


Stay with me

by GeorgiPopovichWitchdoctor



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Coming Out, Exposure therapy, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Other, SO MUCH FLUFF, Separation Anxiety, Slow Build, Social Anxiety, Stripper Katsuki Yuuri, getting feelings and shit, if you haven't noticed i make a whole chapter for sex for those who want to avoid it, lots of love, men in heels, men in makeup, my gay babies are growing up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-16
Updated: 2017-04-02
Packaged: 2018-09-24 20:55:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 89,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9786737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeorgiPopovichWitchdoctor/pseuds/GeorgiPopovichWitchdoctor
Summary: Starting with the beginning at the banquet, what happened, who was there, who he danced with, how the night progressed...It's coming to terms with the conflicts that come with feelings arising between two people who barely know anything about each other and live an entire country away.(It's basically an in depth view of the episodes leading up to what the author has seen from hereon)





	1. He wanted me to stay

**Author's Note:**

> Holy crud this has a lot of fluff in it.
> 
> This is my first published fanfiction! I know it's not entirely accurate to the show, but I started with the banquet and couldn't stop, the words just poured out of me!
> 
> Have fun!

The pounding music blasted through Victor’s ears, the lights were flashing out of control, people bustled and bumped into him in the excitement of the moment. And in the banquet after this, the Grand Prix Final, gold medal laying against his chest against his pounding heart, he can’t hear or feel any of it. His steel blue eyes haven’t been able to look away from the black haired man, thighs clenched tightly around a pole as he was holding the Swiss Giacometti’s toned body up, by the support of only his strong legs. Enthralled by the pure strength of the two as they work to make this a show for their fellow skaters, Victor takes in the skill of this Japanese wonder.  
_“Why wasn’t this guy on the podium with me? He’s got the moves, he’s got the look, the charisma! The passion and…. the surprise factor...”_  Victor wondered, his thoughts racing as he put the pieces of the puzzle together on this magnetic person. __“…I know him. I can’t remember his name, but I know him! He’s a fan of mine, but…. he’s a skater from tonight too!.”__  
Meanwhile, Yuuri was electric. He danced with Chris on this pole with pure shock factor, the cheers around him. It was almost like being in the rink, except a lot less bright and frightening. The 16 glasses of champagne didn’t hurt either, in this particular situation. His brown eyes shot through the lights, knowing exactly who to put those pupils on; Victor couldn’t move the moment they hit him. As Chris lowered down the pole, Yuuri ‘s feet planted against his legs, and began to sway his body against the pole like it was a person he wanted-no—needed to seduce. The swell of his muscular ass waved along to the rhythm as he skillfully threw everything he had into this homage to the pure attraction he had in his heart. _“his eyes belong to me tonight, and I’m going to make them see me as he’s never done before”_

Between the two lustful looking men playing on that pole, the voices around him were laughing and whooping with encore in mind. Yuri, the short blond teenager grumbles at the sight of them together and he elbows Victor in the side. “HEY. OLD MAN. Promise me you’re not going to be up on that pole, you’ll be a disgrace to the entire Russian skating team.”

Mila, wrapping her arms around Yuri, like a big sister, giggles and rubs his head with a gloved hand. “Oh, I think your temper does that quite well, little angry man!”

“LAY OFF, YOU COW.” He argues, but Victor can barely flinches at any of the talk as he smiles to them, crossing his arms.

“Yuri,” He begins, turning his head just slightly, but not looking away to the homage to the idol, “Pole dancing is like ballet but with a tool. I doubt you yourself could hold up against the same pole with the same other party, you could learn a thing or two from this…. little truffle. Who is he?” The silver haired Russian spoke to his rinkmates.

Yuri starts grumbling and chomping the bit at Victor for assuming he couldn’t dance like that, while Mila answers, “I couldn’t say, I wasn’t paying attention to the men’s skating tonight.”

With a perky voice, “That’s Katsuki Yuuri! Skater from Japan, and my best friend! Yuuri was the one in the blue tonight.” Phichit, the Thai skater who had made such a fuss with the presses, as he might as well have been part of them. His phone was directly pointed at the show, camera shutter noises going at the maximum speed that he can.

“…Yuuri Katsuki.” Victor repeats, smiling as he matches a name to this face, rose colored with champagne.  
Phichit leans in as he snaps a quick picture with Victor, while he’s lost in thought. “Heh, score.”

The music draws to a close, and Yuuri is dripping in champagne, sweat, and confidence as he pants, pressed up against Chris, who had his fingers running through the black hair. His other hand clamps on his rear, pressing him closer as they posed for the cameras.  
 _ _ _ __“Oh how I wish I were those fingers”__ _ _ _

Yuri pokes at Victor’s side, grumbling at him. “HEY. SHITHEAD. I’M TALKING TO YOU.”

With a swift grab at a nearby drink tray, the Russian Idol grabs the nearest drink, which ends up being much stronger than he expected, and downs the whole thing in one swig and a hiccup, “And I’m off to dance! Have some fun for once!” Loosening his tie, Victor pulls people apart in the crowd, rushing towards the Japanese dancer. “Katsuki! Katsuki! Yuuri!” He waves his long arms to get his attention.

Chris looks up, Victor looks absolutely touched, but that smile…that’s a new one he hasn’t seen before. “Hey, Yuuri.” He grips him by the shoulders, the young one slumped against the pole still trying to find his footing. “You’ve got a visitor; he looks like he wants an encore.” With a ‘gentle’ nudge, Chris pushes Yuuri against Victor’s Chest, just as the crowd parts.

The Russian lets a small gasp out, catching him carefully. Oh lord, this man reeks of the bubbly. Quickly, he pulls him up by the shoulders and uses his fingers to pull the black hairs out of his face, pushed down by that blue tie wrapped around his head. “Are you alright?”

With the hand of Victor placed on his face, Yuuri presses his cheek against his palm with the biggest smile on his blushing cheeks. “Victor! Nikiforov!” He said his first and last name with equal excitement, laughing with pure joy. “You saw my dance? Did you like it?”

Soon, his blush is matched by the tall soon-to-be 27-year-old, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a GPF banquet turn into this before! Everyone’s so loose! All thanks to you!” He doesn’t pull that hand away, he’s too comfortable having it there, and in fact, his thumb traces the plump and soft cheek of this fascinating man while he has a moment to savor this.

Yuuri grabs hold of his hand, squeezing it as it’s pulled away from his cheek, “Ah gosh! I just wanna dance! Hey! Victor, would you dance with me? I’ve always wanted you to!”

How could he refuse? Those brown eyes have caught and destroyed any chance of saying no for him tonight. “Only if you can keep up!” This adoration grows more and more within each second for Yuuri, and he throws all caution to the wind.

They take the dance floor by storm, one would never guess they were ice skaters, but professional ballroom dancers with a routine planned especially for tonight. Nobody was leading, their footsteps just flittered across the boards as they would meet in the middle and go with the flow. Hands stroking cheeks, arms wrapped around one another, smiles to be had all around.

Phichit thought he was going to wet his pants, and his normally steady hand he would take pictures with is shaking with pure delight. Chris slides on up beside him, watching the two dance the night away. “Where did that Yuuri learn to dance like he does? He’s quite masterful as a drunk, must be incredible sober.”

“Oh, he’s a private dancer in his spare time! Though he’s usually doing this in high heels and covered in glitter.” Phichit answers, nudging at the Swiss.

“…My god, why am I not dating him already?”  
With a laugh, he looks over in answer, “Because that boy wants only one person in this room, and he’s got his attention!”

And that he did, Yuuri pants as he takes hold of Victor, and dips him, his eyes never leaving contact from those blue ones. Victor stares up at him, in untamed surprise that grew more every second he was with him, and yet ten minutes ago he didn’t know Katsuki’s name. That music that changed despite their dancing, and they stayed this way, Victor in his arms, staring into each other’s eyes.

Yuuri was the one to break that silence that was only between them, “I need another drink,” his words broke through heated breath, pulling Victor up. “Are you?” How cute, his words didn’t even pair up properly.

“You might get sick if you have any more champagne,” Victor pants as well, looking for the nearest bar or server to get something for them. _ _ _ _ _ __“Poor friend is going to have the worst hangover if he doesn’t get hydrated…”_______ With a playful agreement, he leads his shorter dance partner over to the bar, telling the bartender to cut the poor Japanese drunk off, giving him water with some syrup instead to make it seem like he’s drinking still. He even slides some money over for the trouble of putting it in a long island glass. With a silly straw.

Meanwhile, victor takes part in some long islands to join in, and they sit off to the side of the room, out of everyone’s attention for now as he gets to know him. “Yuuri, how have you and I never met personally before? I think I would have remembered you from previous banquets!”

There’s a pause to answer, because the intoxicated Yuuri’s lips are dancing around trying to catch the silly straw that keeps spinning in his glass. He gives up for a moment, “Well…. I don’t like coming to them!” Finally, he takes hold of the straw and draws a long sip for the cherry flavored water.

“How can that be? You’re the life of the party!”

The DJ booms into the microphone, "Okay folks! It’s time to slow this dance down a little bit, come take your lovers to the floor, show them how much you mean to them~"

Yuuri’s eyes widen and he sets down the drink, and grabs hold of Victor’s hands again, both clutched close to his chest. “Victor! Let’s dance again! I have to show you how much you mean to me!” Without letting him answer, Yuuri drags his new dancing partner up and despite not on the dance floor….just close enough to hear the music.

“Yuuri! I kind of wanted to relax! You’ve got more stamina than I!” But he doesn’t finish that sentence, instead, he realizes a hand on his waist and another in his left hand, looking down into those brown eyes, stern as they were when he was riding the pole…and soft enough that Victor feels a flutter in his chest. His hand rests on the shorter one’s shoulder and he grips his hand as well, smiling down to him. “But I suppose I can handle another dance.”

Taking the leading step, Yuuri doesn’t take his eyes off Victor, for this was all a dream to him, and he didn’t want to let go. Their steps gentle and romantic, the two sweep away to the edge of the room, like the rest of their lives didn’t matter, and this dance would be the one they would twirl in forever. “Don’t take your eyes off me, Victor,” Yuuri pleads, “stay with me?” This gentle smile that swept across his face, words a little slurry, but still in such deep emotion.

_________“He’s referencing my music…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Again, Victor fails at finding any will to say no, he’s glowing to this young man with excitement and adoration. Stay with me. Stay with me. The words repeat in his head with every step, and he holds Yuuri closer, forehead pressing against his as they sway and spin towards the lobby as the music quiets down from a distance. At this point, the music was almost like muffled elevator music that didn’t matter in the dance anymore, they had each other to sway with and they made their own music by the gentle chuckles when they stumbled, and how the tie on Yuuri’s head slid down to cover his eyes.

They mumbled little things, like how he looked up to Victor and adored his recent routine and the costume. Victor asked about how he admires his love for dance, both of them were in a silky routine of footsteps that just seemed to click like magic. Two pairs of lips were curved in their quiet mumbling smiles, growing close as they kept dancing in the hotel lobby, empty as can be. Yuuri’s feet stop as he sees how close this is for him, but he doesn’t pull away, the feeling is unsure but comfortable at the same time. Victor smiles and squeezes his hand. “Yuuri.”

“Hm?”

“Would you at all mind if I kissed you?” He whispers to him, his forehead pressed against his dancing partner’s once again.

Victor looks down at Yuuri’s lips, and he sees the normally confident man (as far as he knows) and notices he bites his bottom lip. For some reason, it makes him ache for his answer further, and to hope it was yes. Yuuri closes his eyes as he releases his bottom lip, leaning up ever so slightly.

“HEY, FUCKERS.” Yuri storms over to the lobby, throwing the clothes that Japanese Yuuri had left on the dancefloor straight to his face. “How about putting your clothes back on? Nobody needs to see you assholes prancing around naked!”

Yuuri squeals at this sudden clothing attack, and Victor looks up excitedly. “Yuri! Have you met Yuuri?”

The short blond pokes Yuuri in the chest, growling away. “You didn’t actually beat me in the dancing contest, idiot, you left like a moron and started STRIPPING WITH THE WALKING PENIS.”

With all the commotion, Yuuri pulls on his shirt, not buttoning it all the way, while some of their friends walk in to see what all the shouting is about. “Y-You’re asking for a rematch?”

“YEAH YOU PIG, COME ON. DANCE FLOOR. NOW.” Yuri throws a belt at him with frustration. “DISQUALIFIED IF YOU’RE NOT WEARING PANTS.”

“Victor!” Yuuri latches onto him for a moment, catching the taller Russian man by surprise as he wiggles a bit, trying to be playful. “When the season’s over, my family runs a hot spring in Hasetsu, you should come visit!” With that, he pulls back and looks up, such a happy sound in his voice, “Hey! I have an idea! If I win the dance-off, you’ll come to Hasetsu and be my coach!”

The room falls silent, all eyes on them as this intoxicated man child huddles onto the five time winning champion, not to mention one of the wealthiest men in the room like they were lifelong friends. “You’ll do it, won’t you Victor? Be my coach!”

And that glimmer in Victor’s eyes at that moment, there was that familiar feeling…and he couldn’t say no to that face.


	2. What have I done wrong?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after the banquet, Victor is aglow with happiness of this newfound person in his life.

Victor couldn’t remember the last time he dreaded getting out of bed this badly. The pounding music and flashing lights he couldn’t notice last night were finally catching up to him with what felt like lava being poured into his skull. “ooohh….” He groaned, the warm blanket shifted, but not to his own movement. _“….someone is in this bed with me…?” _Slowly, he looks down to his side, where a familiar black haired head was resting quietly on his shoulder, his toned arm wrapped around him like it was meant to be there. Yuuri was quietly tucked into him, so soundly that Victor’s surprised tensing and his small gasp couldn’t shake him in the slightest. _“he’s here…he’s….WE’RE NAKED.” _Victor stared in disbelief and smiled as he pulled the blankets up, making sure his sleeping partner was warm and comfortable.____

____The Dooming hangover was suddenly miniature as he pulled Yuuri into a hearty embrace, surprised as his skin was cold. _“Oh! This won’t do~” _Victor presses his lips to the top of his head, not kissing it, just holding him close within his arms. A gentle grunt in his sleep, Yuuri seems satisfied, happy to be asleep, especially beside Victor.  
His mind raced as he looked down at this man, the sounds of the hotel around them seemed louder when there was such silence in the room. He could swear he heard the young Japanese man’s heart pounding in his sleep, slow, steady, at peace. _“We must have danced the whole night, the last thing I remember was the dance-off, and how we almost ki-…” _His eyes open wide, and the words he spoke were clear in his memory. He asked Yuuri if he could kiss him, and he hesitated to answer. _“I…..I can’t remember if he said this was okay. What if I forced him into this? I can’t remember!” _And even then, they were both blackout drunk, Victor pulls his arm out from under Yuuri and slides to the side of the bed in fear that he may have taken advantage of this new person in his life whom he already cared for._______ _ _ _

__________A camera shutter sound is heard in the bleak dark morning, a light from under the bathroom door and some muffled music from earbuds suddenly comes to mind. Looking up to the door, he thinks how there must be someone else here. Phichit, in his pajama pants and a sweater, opens up, the light shining on the second bed where the two skaters resided. “Oh!” He gently whispered and smiled, looking up from his phone, “You’re awake!” Switching through some filters to choose for his bathroom mirror selfie. “I’m about to go meet Ciao Ciao for breakfast if you…..eh? You look like you’re about to faint, Mr. Nikiforov.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Victor gulps and looks between the Thai skater and the Japanese one, pale in dread and worry. “….Right, I’m Phichit Chulanont, remember?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Right! Phichit!” Victor covers his own mouth as Yuuri shifts in the blankets, whining at the loss of the extra body heat and wrapping himself up in the blanket. “….What on earth happened? Did…..we…?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Phichit giggles and shakes his head. “No, no, nobody in this room got laid last night, I assure you…I and like two other skaters brought you up here. It was the closest of your rooms and to be honest, you weren’t making it easy to get you to bed.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“What?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“After Yuuri won the dance-off, you guys went swimming in the pool with all your clothes on and I had to enlist Chris to help me take you up.” He giggled, watching Victor’s face turning from terrorized to pure relief._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“So we’re naked from the bunch of you?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________That giggle rises again, and is quieted down by the other party shushing quietly. “You did that on your own, the both of you stripped down and climbed into one big bed. I was going to go stay with a friend, but my bed ended up being free after all! You were like puppies! ….Big drunk ones.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________The Russian smiles, happy once more. “I didn’t hurt him then…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“You couldn’t, are you kidding me? He thinks the world of you!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Does he?” A mischievous smirk rises upon his face and he looks down, kneeling down onto the bed, watching as the weight shifts from the blanket. His hand strokes his cheek gently, then pulls away again. “…..Yakov must be searching for me…will you please do me a favor? Make sure he’s alright when he wakes up? He’ll be hungry and parched.”  
With a matching grin, he crosses his arms. “He’s my best friend, you couldn’t leave him in better hands.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Victor hums and gets to the elevator, going over the memories of last night in his head and trying to figure out what happened after the dancing. Perhaps his phone would have something on it, and he pulled it out, clicking the on button, only to see the screen stay black. “Oh. Well, that explains why I didn’t get any calls from Yakov.”  
The yelling from the hall suddenly booms as the door opens up, Victor strolls down the hallway to join it as he knew there wasn’t any fear in this. It was merely his rinkmates. “Oh, when I find the old man, I’m gonna kill him for abandoning me at the banquet!” Yuri growls, opening up the closet to see if he’s there._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Yura, you’d better leave some for me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Mila is sitting on the bed, texting and chuckling at Yuri and Yakov as they search the room._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Victor grins and leans on the doorframe, “Isn’t that cute? You both missed me so much!” Walking in, still wearing the wrinkled suit from last night, buttons in the wrong holes._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________With growling and snapping and all sorts of angry words, Yuri’s volume grew three times that day! “Listen you man whore! I’ve got some choice words for you!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“VITYA.” Yakov grabs his loose tie, “How dare you put on a show like that at the banquet? You make my job look like babysitting!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________He barely budges from the act, “With the angry little kitten around, I thought you picked up another job while the rest of us were winning medals!” Victor holds up the gold and winks with his chuckle._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Yuri screeches and throws a stray shoe at him in frustration, it bounces off his shoulder as he laughs even louder. While the lecture continues, he turns and plugs in his phone to the charger on the nightstand, and realizes he never got Yuri’s phone number while he was with him. “I haven’t had that much fun since….well, I don’t remember.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Don’t tell me you and that other Yuuri painted each other’s nails and gossiped all night l-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Victor interrupted, looking over his shoulder. “We had fun, Yuri, and that’s all that matters. Now I’m about to get naked and wet, unless you want to watch me do what the Japanese Yuuri did last night with the champagne, I suggest you leave.” He whips a towel out from beside the shower in the bathroom, knowing his taunting words mean grimaces from the party outside that door._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Yuuri is in a daze when he awakens, the dark room is a blessing, though it doesn’t feel like it. With a sound of protest at the feeling of being aware of his surroundings, he grunts from the hot blanket wrap, sitting up. White spots flash in his blurry vision from the splitting headache that tears through his mind, and he reaches around for his glasses on the nightstand. “hmng….not there…” He does the normal patdown through the blankets._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Phichit looks over from his bed, where he’s on his laptop. “Hey! Looking for these?” He stands up and brings the blue glasses over, placing them in his hand so he doesn’t have to pick them up. “You put me in charge of those last night!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________With a groan, he puts them on and looks around, then down at his blankets, and notices his bare chest, and the rest of him was the same. “Gah! Phichit, what the hell?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Don’t look at me, I brought you up and you did that yourself! You should have seen yourself last ni-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Don’t!” Yuuri pulls his blankets up over his head, untangling his legs, from them, and the room grows quickly quiet. “I don’t…..I don’t want to hear about yesterday, not one bit of it…” His voice chokes from under the comforter._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Phichit blinks, and he slides onto the bed beside him, wrapping his arms around the blanketed friend. “Okay Yuuri, would you like me to go get some food? Give you some time alone? Maybe you can go shower up?” There’s a gentle nod and a quiet sniffle, which in return, the Thai man squeezes him gently, nuzzling his nose into his shoulder. “Okay, I’m going to get you some eggs and tea, text me if you change your mind or need me to go out longer.” Standing up to get his shoes on, he grabs his coat and leaves the room._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________After the night of dancing and partying, it was easy to forget that all these people they let loose in front of came together for a competition and not everyone left with an award, especially Yuuri who got last place. In fact, Phichit thought after a night with Victor that lasted until dawn might have helped. Perhaps he shouldn’t mention yesterday, though he’ll have to restrain from showing Yuuri those pictures he took._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Sitting in the airport, Coach Celestino’s encouraging words were faded as he walks around Yuuri, sitting on a bench. His mind was clouded. Every moment of his skating routine, how he failed, how his family must be so disappointed, the whole town was so supportive of someone to bring business to Hasetsu. If he had any fans, which in his opinion is limited to just his family and old skating friends, they must be crushed at his failure as well. He can hear the announcements of the flights and grabs his suitcase.  
On his walk to the gate, he’s halted. The sound of Yuuri’s name in a Russian accent taunts him, as he is passed by his dear old. He can’t tell why, but he can smell a familiar aroma, the one he sighed into as he was unknowingly buried facefirst against the kind shoulder that tucked him in this morning. There he was, talking to the angry blond brat, as they paused at their gate, he looked over his shoulder._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Victor’s smile grew, a swell in his chest as he saw that friendly pair of brown eyes. Leaving the gaze of his rinkmates, he smirks, “A commemorative photo?” Now is his chance to see if he can get his number, maybe figure out a time to visit that hot spring he talked about last night. He couldn’t have understood one bit of what happened next.  
The words Yuuri heard from him made his chest crack, he gulps the lump in his throat, and he can feel the hot tears in his eyes ready to form. He turns, rolling his suitcase behind him, head hanging shamefully, _“I can’t…I can’t look at him….” _____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Yuri pokes at Victor’s side, “OY. ARE YOU COMING OR….what?” His stern green eyes watch his older friend. There was worry, fear, pain, and so much confusion in that gaze that many would argue meant nothing. It took him a moment to see where the tall one was looking, after the Japanese Yuuri with an expression rarely seen out of the rink during an emotional show. “…Old man, come on, we’ll miss our flight” His voice softens, reaching his hand out and tugging on his sleeve.  
_“…Did….I insult him?” _  
“Right….Come on then.” Victor plainly says, he picks up the bar of the suitcase again. Falling silent as he walked, wondering why Yuuri suddenly looked at him in fear, when they were forehead to forehead last night. He’s upset somehow at victor perhaps? Did he think the sex did happen? Did leaving in the morning make him feel cheap? Or maybe….He even opposed Victor’s sexuality and didn’t act it unless sober. It wouldn’t be the first time after all.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“Hey, Shithead.” Yuri calls for about the fourth time, “he’s probably jealous of your medal, don’t put that waste of space in your empty head anymore.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Victor can’t help but smile to him, and he pats his hand on his head, scruffling his hair. “Hey! Dick beaters off my hair!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“Thank you, Yuri.” He simply responds in all honesty that would make the most sense. This skater didn’t place, it was probably upsetting. How unfortunate, he really liked this one._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________________“VITYA.” Comes a shout that catches Victor’s attention, he turns his head to Yakov, across the wide aisle of their first class seats. “Tell Yuri he can win the next year’s Grand Prix Final without QUADS, THE BUMBLING IDIOT THINKS HE CAN’T.”  
“I don’t think I can’t, I just know I’ll get a higher score that way!” Mewls the toothpick of a teenager, who hangs over the back of the seat shouting at his coach.  
With a bored hum, Victor halfheartedly mumbles a neutral answer of, “maybe you’re both right.” His neck turns back to the window, mind still stuck in a rut. Mila peeks through the crack of her cushy chair, then turns around to kneel, looking over at him.  
Victor looks up to her only for a moment before returning his gaze to the window. “I haven’t seen you that happy in a while, Vitya…. And I haven’t seen you this sad, either.” His hand waves, looking around to the distracted others in first class. “Maybe the alcohol made him seem more interesting. Both of you were quite abuzz yesterday.”  
He grunts, looking up to her with a slightly irritated expression, but calms it. “We drank a bit too much, we had our fun. Now it’s time to go home and plan for next year.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	3. Self Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life after a crisis can be one hell of a ride, Yuuri is learning to try to move on with that failure (and doing terribly, thanks anxiety) While Victor comes to some surprising realizations himself.

It’s been a week since he got home, and nearly every night, he’s stared at the ceiling trying to dissect everything wrong in his life and push it away. It could be something as little as leaving his shoe untied while he went out running, forgetting to pick up the dirty towels at the western side of the springs, getting a hangnail. Funny thing about depression is the smallest thing can set a person off, for Yuuri, it was the violent collision of losing his best friend Vicchan after not being home for years, living on his own with a job and a competition to train for that he would eventually lose, embarrassing himself in front of the idol he held to be nearly royalty in his field of work, gaining weight due to depressive eating, having to say goodbye to the next best friend to come home to a city he’s SURE is completely disappointed in him. There’s a million other things that are tugging at his heartstrings, until sunlight comes in between his curtains just barely. He hadn’t even showered in a few days, neglecting the basic things that he knows he should do to take care of himself. “I should at least get up, do something productive to stop thinking about all this, if I just lay in bed all day, I’ll fall asleep and be alone with those thoughts again tonight…”  
Slowly, he gets dressed, shuffling out the door and down the quiet hall of the sleeping Springs. He looks into the front hall where all the tables sat, noticing they’re clean and the floor is swept. Perhaps he’ll check the towels and the kitchen for things to do, it would at least help his parents out a little more than they’ve had the past five years when he abandoned th-. “Gah! I gotta stop thinking like that, that’s what you’re trying to do. Stop thinking like that.”  
Luckily, to Yuuri’s surprise, there’s a pile of dirty dishes sitting beside the large sink just waiting to be taken care of. Something to do. Putting on the apron hanging on the door hook by the door, he ties it behind his back and starts filling the sink with hot water and soap, setting the bowls that need soaking in first. The warmth was a welcoming feeling to constantly falling forward onto the ice with his hands, scratching them up from sharp ice chips he lands on. There his mind goes again, right back to the ice. It wasn’t a good idea for him to put so much pressure, yet so much stress relief into skating. Who knows, this may have been his last competition, and he’ll tell his future children or nieces and nephews that he was in a major competition that he couldn’t even place in. Hooray, more disappointment from the people he’d love.  
“Hey” He jumps at the voice, looking over his shoulder to see Mari, her cigarette still hanging out of her mouth with a gentle carefree expression on her face per usual. She’s carrying some cups from her room over to the side of the sink.  
With a quiet voice, he gulps, “Sorry. Just startled me is all…”  
His older sister tilts her head a bit as she glances to the side, looking at his face, studying it quietly. “You’re doing that thing again.” Grabbing a towel to dry dishes with, she tucks over on the other side where the clean dishes were sitting on the drying rack. “Apologizing for doing nothing wrong.”  
As she speaks, he can feel a twinge in his chest, like his heart was stuck and suffocated. He wants to apologize for apologizing, holding his tongue was the best thing to do in this situation. “Yeah, it’s a habit I need to break.” He lets out a quiet chuckle, trying to play it off.  
The silence arises, her towel gently squeaking on the drying dishes before she piles them neatly to be put away in the shelves. “So how was Detroit? I didn’t get too many calls from you like I thought I would.”  
“I didn’t want to bother anyone, there’s a big timezone difference between us there and here.” He logically states, keeping his eyes down to the suds he’s had his hands in, scrubbing one bowl specifically for a little longer than needed. With his hands shaking, it’s easier to keep them doing something so Mari wouldn’t notice.  
Mari puts one hand on his arm, he doesn’t look up at her, just stops scrubbing. “I still missed my little brother.” Yuuri wants to apologize for that, but he worries anxiously that he will hear someone to stop doing that again. In fact, he even whimpers to hold back saying it, biting his lip. “I’m really glad you’re home, Yuuri.”  
A warmth fills his suffocated chest, his sister might be quiet, blunt, and a little stern sometimes, but she was his rock through rough moments in life. Even if he may not want to express his current troubles to her, he knows if he did, she’d pull all the bad out to make room for good. “Thanks, Mari…I did want to call, I wish I did…How was your…er… ‘graduation’?” He nudges with his shoulder, mentioning the “Promotion” their parents gave her to manage the springs business.  
“Ugh.” She groans, raising a brow to him. “You had to call it that.” That put a smile on his face to bug her about something, that made him feel a little more at home. “It’s alright, I know they’re just trying to ease into retirement so they’re seeing if I can handle it.  
Yuuri has a moment of confusion, looking as he passes a wet pan over to her. “Retirement?”  
She nods gently, “That’s what I think. They’re getting old after all. We’ve been helping out here since the day we could walk, so it’d be pretty much the same.”  
With a shrug, Yuuri looks down at the sink to drain it, having scrubbed the final dish. “ Yeah, it’s just strange to think about, it feels like they’ll run this place forever. It’s their temple.”  
“Well, it’s their passion, and even when times got hard, they did what was best for themselves. Everyone needs to take care of what they love.” Her eyes look down to his face, and she knows that expression. There it was, the big sister wisdom.  
He knew exactly what she had meant to do, and his hands start shaking a little more as he tries to resist blinking and throwing himself into her arms. His eyes are burning, his chest tightened, the wrinkled dishpan hands clutch onto his down drying towel. “Yuuri.” The sound of his name made him shiver again, his hand rose to his mouth to cover it, in case he would just burst out in loud sobbing to wake any guests.  
Mari sets her cigarette down in a nearby ashtray, blows the smoke out the side of her mouth, and waves off the air. Her hands pull Yuuri over to her in a big hug, loose enough not to make him feel like he’s choking. “Breathe, Yuuri…” she whispers, “You’re gonna get hiccups.” Slowly, her protective arms are met with a hug back, with shaking arms, and glasses that were pressed into her shirt, dripping with tears.  
Yuuri doesn’t let go for a while, this hug didn’t have to end when it was this badly needed, and he knew she would pat him if she needed him to pull away. Chin resting on his head as he tucks himself under her embrace, she rubs his back as he hiccups, just as she predicted. “Shhhh….”  
There is no certain memories of when Mari first started helping Yuuri with his anxiety, the earliest memory he has is when he was 4 and wanted to join Minako’s dance classes, afraid to ask on his own. Every panic attack he’s ever had, she was the one person able to douse the flames without fault. These past five years, barely getting into contact with her, he can think of so many nights that he needed just to hear her instructions to breathe. Yet all she did was have faith in his ability to survive himself.  
“Hey” She pats his back after a moment of relaxing, “I’ll tell mom and dad you went to the Ice Castle to practice today.” Releasing him of the hug, she pats his shoulders.  
“But…I’m not sure if I’ll ever return to any competition…” He mumbles, wiping his red eyes.  
“Who says you’ve got to be in a competition to go skating? You should go do it for fun again. Remind yourself why you fell in love with it again. Okay?”  
That was the perfect thing she could have said, he couldn’t remember the last time he went skating for fun. 

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Victor was lost in thought, practicing his basic exercises on the rink back in St. Petersburg, eyes glazed over in his slow skate across the gaze of Yakov.  
“Vitya! Watch your free leg!” He shouted, yet as usual, he barely listens, turning to switch his legs. Leaving the balding man to grunt in displeasure, per usual. He grumbles, looking over to Georgi and Yuri, “He acts like a child with his turn on the ice.”  
Yuri glares through the side of his face not curtained by blonde hair, his green eyes follow after Victor, not in concern, but curiosity to how the normally confident man seemed bruised. That night with the pig, he must be messed up on that still, even though it has been weeks. “Coach, maybe your nagging doesn’t work, ever think of that?” He snaps over to Yakov, sipping his water bottle.  
The gravely grumble that turns to him is not new. “Don’t tell me, I should just let you all skate how you want, eh? Yes that will definitely produce some actual other award winning skaters. How many Grand Prix gold medals have you two won?”  
“Hey, old man, you can’t keep nursing on those five medals from Victor alone as you being a good coach, maybe he won from skill instead of angry bald men shouting at him.”  
Victor, passing by them at that moment in the conversation, he skates over in time for the coach to erupt. “AW, YURI! Did you just say I have talent?” Arises a grin from the silver haired winner, the skating picks up the pace as he snaps back to reality.  
“Fuck off, Victor.” Defensive, the short one crosses his arms, yet Victor throws his arms around him.  
“You do care!”  
“AH. FUCK OFF. GET OFF ME.”  
Yakov, slamming his binder of plans down, shouts “ENOUGH.” The skaters look up, pretty sure they can see the vein in his forehead pop. Even Mila who was up in the bleachers can be seen zooming in on it to send to Sara Crispino. “Vitya, you’ve won five times in a row at the biggest skating competition.”  
“Thank you, Yak-“  
“I’M NOT DONE.” He points him down, his fat fingers close to his chest, enough that Victor releases Yuri. “Your performances are nothing new, nobody cares about it anymore. Do you think you’re unstoppable? No! The world is done being surprised at you, they’re not impressed anymore. You might as well be done for. If all you’re in these competitions for is the medals, you’ve got them. But the world isn’t excited to see you anymore.”  
Victor keeps a straight face, backing up a bit on the ice. Yuri can pinpoint in those blue eyes what words are hurting the most, and those hands slip calmly into his pockets the disguise the seething rage that shakes them. “Coach,” he puts on his fairly frightening smile, the one that resembles gritted teeth and growling, “I think you’re going to have a stroke if you keep talking like that. Why don’t we break for lunch?”  
With a throw of his hands, Yakov goes on rambling under his breath, turning to leave the rink and avoid all further conflict. Yuri looks to his rink mate, he didn’t know how to poke at this fire without setting the whole pit ablaze. “….Well he’s bitchier than usual, probably a side effect of his old man medication.” Victor nods to him, looking to the ice where it showed the marks of where he’d been.  
There was a silence as he looked to Georgi, who was on his phone, sighing to the screen, unsure how to break that tension. Nobody seemed to be able to show much they cared about it.  
“…Victor.” Yuri pokes at his side from where he reaches over the side of the ice. “I want my program you promised me.” It’s the only thing he can think of to break the heated words that still lingered in the air.  
“Hm?” He looks up, barely paying any attention. “No, I’m not hungry, Yuri.” He continues to skate along, Yakov’s words echoed in his head.

“I tried not to think about it when I heard the comments at this year’s final. How the judges even commented that someone younger should have been doing my routine that I put all my heart into….seems like the only one who liked it was….Yuuri Katsuki.”

Mila leans on the rink side by Yuri, bumping his hips with her own. “you know he’s not going to remember that promise…but it’s sweet of you that you tried to make him feel better. You even stood up to the grouch.”  
He looks slightly offended, starting to do his stretches, pulling his leg up in a standing split. “Stand up for him? I’m telling of Yakov.”  
Her chuckle is quiet. “I’m proud of you, Vitya could use a break to take care of himself. Why don’t we take him out for lunch? I think if we encourage him to come with us, he will.”  
“I couldn’t care if he wants to eat, why don’t we leave him be? You could use some practice on your splits, I’m a better ballerina than you.”  
With a flick of her fingers, she twangs on the side of his head. “Hush, kitten.”  
“Ow! Listen bitch!”  
Mila couldn’t give a rat’s ass, she waves over to Victor. “Vitya!” Briefly, he looks over, slowly sliding on back. She puts on her best pout and crosses her arms. “I need some company to go for food, but I never feel safe walking to the restaurant that the little fairy wants to go to. The chefs always hit on me!” Yuri looks up, not sure why his name was put into this without his permission. “He’s just begging to go! Come with us, pleaaaasse?”  
“Hey! Hag! I….” He looks to Victor’s face, blinking at them with a little bit of surprise, but he did glance away to the packed lunch on the stands, unnervingly. “…I want to eat my food, and I’m getting it.”  
Victor pats her shoulder with a laugh, “Then let’s feed the growing kitty, he’ll bite.” He wraps an arm around her with a raised eyebrow. “But you and I both know that you can handle yourself around those Chefs….but thank you for inviting me.”  
Mila sticks her tongue out to him like a little sister would, then grabs her coat.


	4. Fantasizing Eros

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The two lovebirds are fantasizing about each other and they don't even know it. Being an author rocks.

It’s been weeks, Yuuri rests in his bed, looking up at the posters of Victor on his walls, lit by the streetlights outside his window at YuTopia. The gentle glow against the colorful ink on his image made him glow in a familiar way, a likeness that Yuuri’s grown up with for a long time when he can’t sleep at night. He imagines what those eyes must look like up close, so crystal clear and sure. They must be different than any performance he makes on the ice, with insecurities like any other human being must, even if he was considered a god of the frozen dance world.  
Yuuri imagines what his lips would taste like, how they would feel rolling between his own. This fantasy has played out before, and for some reason, he can’t put his finger on why, he can almost sense Victor’s body pressed against his, in an embrace of delight and adoration. The close brush of their lips together would be at nibbles, he pulls his hand up to his face, touching his bottom lip for just a moment.  
\--------------------------------  
Victor is looking through pictures of the banquet, at least what pictures he was able to get before his phone died and for a temporary time, he did too. In his bed, at his apartment, Victor scopes out the competition and who they are, where they came from, hoping to get a bit of inspiration of what direction to go for the next year. Eros and Agape, two very different dances for the same piece, in different tones. “if I chose Agape, I could make it innocent while sexy perhaps and combine the two..though that hardly seems correct.” As his finger slides along the pictures, it stops at one, in the background is Yuuri, who is pantsless. They’re just gone, nowhere to be found. Usually he’s able to pass this one by, even noticing that temporary partner in the night in the back…But he admires it.  
Mostly because he’s zooming in, and he notices those muscular thighs. “But Eros…that is a tribute to him, to the man who surprised everyone in the room...” Sliding his finger once more, he knew the next picture, because he’s studied it and admired it in his private time. The moment Yuuri had crossed his legs around that pole, and claimed the room’s attention, stealing Victor’s fantasies and replacing them with this.  
His warm hand pulled up the waistband of his underwear he was planning to sleep in tonight, and squeezed around his softened girth, wishing he were the prop in this stripping dance for Yuuri. To have his legs wrapped around him, whether it be his hips, his face, he wished for a taste of him, perhaps even to fill him.

\------------------------------

Yuuri liked to imagine Victor was one to share dominance, one who could dominate above or below. When it would come to kisses, that Russian beast would have gentle bites that lingered, and could almost feel the hot breath upon his lips. AS his mind continued to wander, his tongue licked to the side of his mouth with a light whimper, “nnf~” breaks the silence in the quiet bedroom, dark as the day he unknowingly wrapped around his idol. …..”I need more.” He mumbles to himself, pulling his blankets aside, Yuuri walks to the wooden desk, opening the bottom drawer and pulling out a box, inside sits a rubbery dildo, a suction cup on the base end of it. Along with a bottle of lube, half a bottle has been used up, and he’s thinking he may need to invest more in it after the thoughts he’s had lately.  
His bathroom door opens only for him to be blinded by the golden light above the sink, he loses his pants along the way, throwing them in his laundry hamper on the way. Dampening the bottom of the suction cup with some water from the sink, Yuuri lowers the toilet lid down, and presses it down there, watching the soft dildo flop a bit as he adjusted it to sit still. Years ago, he’d learned to give lap dances in a Detroit club, and had gotten the side job thanks to Phichit putting in a good word for him. Not only had the stripping helped pay off his schooling, his rent for the temporary apartment, gym rental, equipment….it had also given him a new way to relieve himself.  
The job wasn’t bad at all, it helped bring up his confidence when it came to performing in front of people, improved his flexibility and dancing, and he’d been surprisingly good at it.  
He remembers specifically one night, he was too riled up, he didn’t want to be full mast on someone’s lap in case his manager would see, and he needed a way to calm down discreetly in the back room. Using a chair, the same way he’s using this lid, he imagined a faceless figure most of the time, one with a soothing and confident voice whispering in his ear. Tonight he has a face, and he intends on riding Victor in his wildest fantasy in ages.  
_He steps out, pumps, wearing what they did last Halloween for Playboy night, the bunny ears and all, like a runway walk for him to present himself to anyone interested. Yet he was the one doing the shopping tonight, and he spotted that prize, who stared with a sultry expression from the bar, biting his thumb gently as he saw Yuuri approach. “You~….” The Japanese man pointed, a strand of hair falling to his forehead. “You look like you’re thirsty for more than just a drink~…”_  
 _Victor smirks from behind his glass at him, standing up and swiping his hair out of his face for a moment, only for it to fall across his eyes again. “Are you here to quench me?”_  
 _“If you think you can handle me~ I’ll break a few rules if you’re a good boy..”_  
_¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬-----------------  
_ Victor pulls up the hashtag for all the pictures of the banquet, hoping he can find more than these two blurred pictures he managed on his phone. At his search, typing only with his left thumb, his eagerness has brought to life what was beneath the blanket as his fingers slowly tended to his cock. “Y-Yuuri…” he breathes, the pictures loaded and he scrolls through them, not hard to find the events that really shook up that night. One picture stands out to him in particular, the perfect example of splits, Yuuri has angled his legs, one all the way up to his shoulder’s height, and the other straight down. His tight underwear groped at his cheeks, even detailed the prize beneath the wrapping. How did this man have this skill?

And then a tag hit him, #stripperlife by Chris, mentioning “He’s a better stripper I hear when he’s at work” in the time it was posted.  
Yuuri knew this because he did it for a living? Victor’s hands shake, and he drops his phone to the side, not needing those pictures to get off anymore.

_All he wants is to imagine what that man was like, to know how he dressed and moved as a stripper, and his mind chose to imagine him in a black corset, stockings that squeezed those thunderous muscled thighs, heels that show off his tight ass, and a black thong that barely contained his package. Rarely did he think this much detail into his fantasies, but tonight, he knew exactly what he needed to see. “I-I want to taste….I want to taste you…” He moans as he lets his fingers stroke slowly._  
 _Victor’s whisper carries on in his imagination, having to slow down a little from getting excited. He was there, sitting on the end of a bed at this methodical image of Yuuri, who stands, shifting from left to right. His hands stroke down his chest to his thighs, then his hips, a flash of his tongue as he licks his lips, eyeing Victor with a stern and sultry smile. “I’ve been waiting for this, Victor…” Yuuri mumbles as he lowers onto the Russian’s lap. His spandex hammock that nestled his package presses against Victor’s bulge. With a groan, silver hair falling in his eyes, he grips onto this stripper’s hips, grinding up against him with dirty intentions in mind. Yuuri whimpers, pressing his cheek against his partner’s warm face with a huff and a barely contained moan._  
 _A pair of teeth take advantage of this as he bites onto the lobe of Yuuri’s ear, “Do you want me, Yuuri?” he pants the words to him, “I bet you’re aching for me to be inside you~” With a playful chuckle, he releases his hear and looks down, with his index finger, Victor eases it between the elastic band and the bareness of his side, sliding the finger to his cheeks, pulling them apart playfully_  
 _“Gah!” He moans in response, shuddering to the taller one, who chuckles at the eager wiggle of the corset wrapped treat._  
 _“Why don’t I prepare you properly?” Reaching to his side table, he takes some lube out, stroking his fingers with it, and gently pulling aside the thong with the other hand. “Yuuri, would you at all mind if I fingered you?” His dreamlike Yuuri let out a laugh that was gentle, innocent, adorable, but his response?_  
 _“I want you to spread me~…”_  
 _Victor gasps a little, his shaking hands both at work as one grips the blankets, and the other strokes, resisting from getting off too soon, he didn’t want this to end before he got to the good parts._  
 _With his middle finger, he prods at Yuuri’s tight hole, taunting him with every gentle poke that goes a little deeper each stroke. Watching him wrihe as it slides in all the way slowly as his palm rests against the valley of his muscular cheeks. “Do you want more? You’ll need it to get ready for what I’ll do to you~”_  
 _The response was a giddy nod, breathless already as he’s shaking against his hand. Slowly his middle finger slides out, the tug causing a whine at the lack of pressure there again, but Victor takes his ring finger as well, pairing them together as he gently digs at the hole one more time, easing gently against it, getting him used to it only halfway in. “Breathe, Yuuri~.” Feeling him shake at the change, but his hips shook, almost begging for more. Victor gives, sliding all the way in, wiggling a bit to help him stretch out._  
 _\--------------------------_  
 _Victor is sitting in the lounge chair before Yuuri, strippers just like him are dancing on the poles and on the runways, but his blue eyes belong to Yuuri right now. He lowers down, with the music playing , he turns around, the little bunny tail on the costume wiggles as he spanks himself, bending forward, showing off those cheeks._  
 _Looking over his shoulder, he can see the pleasure the Russian has over this show, gripping the armrests of the seat he’s in, leaning forward, licking his lips. With the plan Yuuri has in mind for his performance, he decides to step it up a little, reaching back to his zipper, he slowly pulls it down, still shaking his hips. “What are you…doing?” The voice behind him asks._  
 _“Breaking a few rules~..” Yuuri answers, stripping down to the heels alone, letting the clothing drop around his ankles, the sway of his hips still to the beat of the song, lights dance across his back as he shows himself off. There’s a little gasp in a few onlookers as he keeps dancing, getting closer and closer to being on Victor’s lap._  
 _He turns to face this one man audience, showing how his length had hardened, ready for attention. “Would you like a sample before you order? On the house…~” Yet he needed no coaxing, this silver haired god leans forward, his tongue stroking the bottom of his cock, all the way to the tip before he wrapped his thin lips around it, humming with anticipation. The Japanese man’s hips gently started thrusting to the motion of his tongue’s direction, noticing his head bobbing gently to the thrusts. “V-Victor, y-you’re so handsome like this…”_  
 _Victor’s hands can’t help but twitch as they reach for his ass, only to see…a glass plug already in this stripper’s hole, plugged, dripping with lube down his muscular thighs. His lips pull off to take a deep breath, panting the words, “My god…”_  
 _“What’s wrong, Victor, can’t handle it?” He taunts and sways above him, turning back around to show off, Victor grasps his hips, squeezing his cheeks. “Ooh, breaking a rule of your own eh? Putting your hands on the merchandise?”_  
Yuuri groans as he thinks of this, all the while he’s having his fun while he fantasizes. With a moment of preparation, his tight hole is prodded. Yuuri takes a deep breath, relaxing his bottom half as he presses down, easing the false dick into himself with a gentle whine. “V-Victor, I want to satisfy you. I know I can show you my skill, enough to make you mine for one night…”

_The champion’s hands squeeze as he bites onto one of his muscular cheeks, somewhere along the way, his pants are wrinkled on the floor, fully erect at the show, grunting hungrily as his fingers slip up between those thunderous thighs, taking up that dripping lube that drips from his hole. While he bites and nibbles, he starts stroking himself off, mesmerized by the scent of his partner who put on this show all for him. Slowly his mouth meets down to the plug that sits gently in his stuffed hole, he clamps his teeth around the base and slowly slides it out of Yuuri with a pop._  
_Yuuri’s moan is rung out with a shudder, more than prepared to feel himself fill up with Victor’s cock, ready to show him how he ran this club and how he would get everything he dreamed of tonight._  
 _Lowering his hips to meet Victor’s, Yuuri feels his hole prodded with the tip of that cock, warm with pre cum that bubbled at the tip of his thickness. God, how he loved that warmth, how he wanted it to fill his gut already. He had a lot more to do before that would happen though._  
 _The slow draw of breath he has to take in as he feels the throbbing fill him, slowly pressing down._  
Yuuri, in his bathroom, bottomed out on this false cock, feeling it press against his prostate, huffing as he sits on it a moment, getting used to where it was, even wiggling his hips a little. _“You like that, Victor?” “Hmnng~….” He hears Victor, moaning at the depth within him, hands slide onto his hip_  
\---------------------------  
Victor settles his knees into the mattress, head hanging as he strokes, panting, grunting as his hips thrust into the motions of his hand, aching for more, but he was holding out. He’s having far too much fun in his head, imagining all the ways he wants to fill Yuuri. How he ached for that smooth skin to press against his, to take him away from all the crowds, the press, the lights and music, and to just press his face into his shoulders. He wants to breathe into Yuuri, to leave little purple marks on his collarbone from kisses and nibbles, to hear him beg for more. More than anything, he wanted to feel Yuuri want him deep into him.  
_He could see it all now, as he lowered Yuuri onto the bed, watching his face as he’s blushed and flustered at the sight of this man above him. Victor gently slides between his cheeks, feeling how tense he is, and how tight he’ll be, and he wiggles down to his hips, lifting them up and grinding against his prepared hole, enjoying every moment that he was in his grasp._  
_The view of his partner aching for his hole to be filled, gripping around his shoulders. “I-I need you…” He moans, “I need to feel you fill me…”_  
 _Victor nearly shoves in all at once, wanting to satisfy him in every way possible, but he holds back to make sure he’s comfortable. Slowly, his girth presses into the fleshy entrance, feeling it grow tighter as his lubed tip widens Yuuri’s passage, guiding his partner to relax with helpful whispers, with gentle encouraging kisses on his chin, one of his hands strokes his hair gently. “Let me hear you, Yuuri, let me know if I’m hurting you. ~” His curious hand, wet with excess lube, takes hold of the hard rod from his lover’s waist, and he strokes nice and slow, his thumb playing with the tip._  
 _“M-More, Victor….” The response, so soon into this surprises Victor, and he looks up to him, a glance to assure that’s what he really wants. “I…. I want….m-more~.”_  
 _The devious smirk on his face drew across his face as he gently pulled out, and presses in nice and deep for him. “Like this~?”_  
 _“N-Nnnh!” The whimper was almost euphoric, to hear that he was pleasuring Yuuri, and he kept going. The thrusting pressed deep within his tightness, throbbing within his lover…. lover?_  
 _Victor pauses, he stops stroking altogether, blinking. His fantasies usually just depict lust, yet that term came to mind, to be a lover against Yuuri. It shocked him a little, but it makes the burning in his chest fierier than before. He wanted to treat this man as his lover, he wanted to make love to him._  
 _The squeak that was produced from that throat that he could imagine kissing all over, leaving bite marks, marking as his own. “V-Victor~ …. Victor~ ….”_  
 _Thrusting in at an easy pace, his silver hairs hung down before his forehead, eyes staying on him. “You want all of me?” Grinding on in, feeling himself throb in this tight hole._  
 _“I-I want……I-I want to….aahh~” Yuuri can barely get the words out._  
 _“Tell me what you want, Yuuri, I want to please you…” Slowly, he draws back his cock to being halfway in, he can almost feel the shiver of his other half as he does so, the deep breath it took. “I want to make you so happy.”_  
 _With the pair of stockinged legs, they squeeze Victor back in all the way in, leaving him with a shocked face and a grunt of pleasure. “I want you… and you alone~”_  
 _Pulling gently out, “Y-Yes…Yes, Yuuri~…” He moans, thrusting harder into him, giving him exactly what he wants. They play at this pace with a heavy desire to press on, showing with his hips wiggling up against this top’s hips, and vice versa to grind deeper. Victor can feel himself growing closer, though he doesn’t want this fantasy to end._  
 _Bending down, kissing his partner on his lips, tongues dancing against each other, his pale fingers take hold of his ribcage while those curious thumbs gently stroke at his nipples. When the reaction is a shiver within his palms, and the flutter of toes behind Victor’s back, it makes him grin wide. His lips meet down at those perky nubs, giving each a lick with a turn of his tongue that left a string of spit from Yuuri’s mouth. “I-I’m g….I’m gonna…”_  
 _“Yes~, show me how much you love it~…” Victor moans into his chest, his lips still licking playfully, that is until he’s met with a new flavor to this batch, as he feels cum shoot to his face, clinging on his smooth lips as his tongue explored the corners of his mouth for a taste. While it spattered onto him, he watched Yuuri writhe, his moan was so hearty as his hips grind on Victor, almost trying to feel him deeper within._  
 _So he delivered. While watching his partner shiver and writhe, Victor presses in nice and deep, going back to fast paced as he awaits his own orgasm to fill Yuuri, watching his face as he kept going was the ticket, and soon enough he thrusts with a whine, his hands sliding to the hips of his lover who shudders at the warmth that fills him, just feeling him throb was enough to make him shake._  
Victor pants as he opens his eyes, his sheets were a mess as he looked around, realizing there was nobody there to joke with about what to do next time. That domestic feeling after an orgasm is something he’s always loved, and yet here he was, alone in his apartment save for the dog in the living room. With a shake of his head, he stands up to get a towel to clean up what he can on the sheets.

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

Yuuri is panting, slapping his ass down against the seat he has his false cock rubs into his depths with a slick stroke. Going faster was a good idea, he forgot how much he missed being able to do this in his private bathroom at the other end of the house from everyone else. His moans could afford to be louder than his apartment with Phichit, though he knew his roommate wouldn’t have minded. As his hips met down to the hilt of the rubbery dildo, he whimpered with relieved smile as it once again rubbed against just the right part of him within.  
 _ _ _ _ __Swirling those hips as he pressed down against Victor’s, he could see his hands reaching onto his hips to grip onto them like he was doing the armrests before. Though it was hard to relax at first, he used his strong legs to grind down onto his lap with a playful grind and wiggle. The moans that were breathed to his bare back was excitable, it made him want to taunt him, to toy with his cock until it would cover him all over with white cum. For he was very close himself. ‘Easy Yuuri, let him cum first…’ he thought to himself, taking a deep breath and holding back for as long as he can.  
It made him feel powerful, it made him want to show this to the world that he’s claiming this athletic star as his own. From the vapor of his hot breath that stuck to Yuuri’s back, he could tell Victor wanted it just as bad, pulling his hips down harshly against his hips in a need to be connected with him as much as humanly possible. “Y-Yuuri…I-I won’t last…” He weeps, shaking like he can’t take it anymore.__ _ _ _ _

_________Then is when Yuuri picks up the pace, though his legs are already sore from this lap dance that’s so much further than before, taunting Victor, letting him go crazy with the feeling. And that’s what he does, Victor is nearly clawing at his thick thighs as they tense from bouncing against his lap as he feels his cock tense, pressing his face against that muscular back and grunting with everything he’s got, filling him with hot spunk, delivering all he can to press his hips up against him. Yuuri takes hold of his own length, stroking and shivering as the heat presses ever so subtly against his inner walls. The onlookers, eyes glued on, even the dancers as he grinds against Victor for every drop he’s got.  
Yuuri huffs, his own shot releasing with a gasp, splattering down onto his thigh highs, , resting against his hips, panting laying back in this romantic lounger, arms wrapped around his. There’s an afterglow as he feels that strong chin rest over his shoulder, kissing his neck._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

And just like that, Yuuri is panting in his bathroom, his spittle between his fingers. He pants, his heavy breath making him that much more excited, pulling himself off that suctioned cock on the seat. Okay. It was time to clean up.  
Yuuri had stopped dreaming of domesticity after sex a long time ago, after working in the club with Phichit, it just stopped appearing to him. Especially since his preferences were different than most would assume. He wasn’t sure of his sexuality quite yet, but Phichit and another friend in Detroit were very supportive when it accidentally slipped out in conversation one day.  
After a quick cleanup and putting the toys away, he slips under his covers and curls up into them to get warm.


	5. Almost There

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a lot of things to do when the video comes out, and Victor and Yuuri couldn't expect the outcomes of their actions about to arise.

 

Yuuri shuffles into the Ice Castle, after not being around for five years, it’s like visiting a childhood memory, and the people that came with it.  Like that voice from behind the skate rental counter saying “we’re closed.”  Nishigori Yuko, she was still the same as Yuuri left her, working here with her husband Takeshi. 

“Even for an old friend?” His voice crackles a little, and before he knew it, they were sitting with each other, talking about all the things that they missed. 

 

“Gosh, how was America? How is your English improved?” She asks, smiling excitedly.

Yuuri laughs, “I couldn’t order any takeout for a while.  I didn’t know how to ask for simple things, but I got the hang of it.  How’re the triplets? Last time I saw them, they were one and making you lose sleep.”

With a nervous chuckle, she rubs the back of her head, “They still do that….Anyway, did you want to skate still?”  He nods gently, setting his jacket on the side and putting on his skates.

“I had something to show you, a routine I’ve been working on for a while. You of all people would appreciate it.”

“Oh? I’d love to see it! Go for it, please!”

Yuuri is back on the ice, the silent rink only echoes the scrape of the well used blades that had put him through so many competitions, the sound bouncing back from the walls to him. His hands moved up, one feigning to his forehead with a gentle caress of the air around his face, the routine most recently performed by Victor Nikiforov, “Stay with me.”

There was a gentle feeling that seems to cover those inner wounds, the feeling that they’re healing just from the motion of an admirer.  Yuko watched her friend with a smile, feeling three pairs of little feet nearby to peer over the rink side, her husband can be seen on the other side of the rink to watch as well

“Wow, mom…is that Katsuki Yuuri?”

“Yes, Axel, he made it home.”

“He got fat.” States Loop.

Yuko glares down to them momentarily, but goes back to the friend who needed this, he finishes and takes a deep breath.  “Yuuri!” She squeals excitedly, “that was beautiful!”

He’s about to speak when a strong arm from Takeshi who pulls him over in one of his macho guy hugs.  But as he’s speaking, talking about the skate and how much they missed him, he can see the triplets, rushing over to him as he steps off the rink.  He’d forgotten how much they like skating, just like their parents.  They knew everything about him already, because the first question to pop out of their mouths is, “Wow, you really got fat, why’d you get fat?”  “Did you really get last place in the final?” “Why’re you practicing now after all that?”

“Girls!” Yuko growls and shoos them away.

Yuuri chuckles a bit, feeling himself descend down to that level he was at earlier.  “Perhaps I should go.  I can catch up with you two another time, perhaps when it’s not closing time for you.”

“If you say so, Yuuri, please be safe going home! I’m glad to see you back!” Takeshi pats his shoulder, “Come back anytime, okay?”

Saying his goodbyes and hugging them all, he walks out.  The sky was starting to darken from the evening upcoming.  He didn’t realize how long they just skated and talked.  It was a day of self-care.  He had gotten the courage to go back to the ice where he first fell in love with his carrer.

Maybe he was going to be alright after all, sure there was a chance that he’d wake up and the pain was still there, but he’d be better.  He cried, he skated, he talked about what was hurting to the people he loved and missed, and he hadn’t ignored the troublesome pains that were festering in his gut.  His hands tuck into his pockets as he thinks about what he should do next to care for himself…and his thoughts go straight into a pork cutlet bowl.

Victor opens his door with a bag of groceries, barely filled with much other than some bread and foodcans.  Maccachin barks and rushes over excitedly, his curly haired ears bouncing as he tries to sniff the bag.  “Ah! Puppy! Are you excited for your walk?” His poodle runs in a circle, hyped up to get outside.

Setting his phone on the counter, he takes the leash and puts the grocery bag by the cabinets, hooking up that puppy dog to his blue leash.

His phone started buzzing somewhere around when he walked out the door, and to the corner down the street where he sits on the bench with his beloved poodle.  He didn’t notice anything indifferent until he takes a deep breath and looks at his surroundings, that’s when he notices his side pocket is going a little crazy.  He pulls it out to look at who must be calling him, and the screen flashes between a few different faces, Yakov, Yuri, and Chris.  “What in the world…?” There was a rare reason why Christophe would call him, as they text more often than anything.  He pulls up the square that has the Swiss man’s face on it, holding it to his ear.  “Chris?”  He can understand Yakov and Yuri calling him, but his friend too? “What’s going on? Is everything okay?”

“You’re going to want to sit down, and if you’re in public, get home quickly.  I bet you’ll be swarmed by paparazzi soon.” What could he have done that would cause this?  He pulls on the leash and heads back down the road towards his apartment building.

“Why? What is it?”

“It doesn’t sound like you’ve heard about that Japanese boy from the banquet.”

Victor drops his key to the door at the mention of him, his heart dropping in his chest. “Katsuki Yuuri? What’s wrong? Is he okay? What happened to him?”  He rushes into his apartment building and up the stairs.

“He’s alright, but I’m sending you the video with him that was posted, call me when you watch it.”

He doesn’t even say goodbye as he rushes on into the apartment, and he doesn’t wait for Christophe to send the video.  With shaking hands, Victor plops down onto his couch to search for what comes up with Yuuri’s name, and he can see it on the front page of his main search engine, it’s hit the news.  _“It looks like he’s on ice in this video, did he get hurt? Is he alright?”_  Even though Chris had said he was alright, he still nervously awaited the video to load..

AS it began, he recognizes it immediately.  There’s no music, but the Russian doesn’t need to pull it up, he can hear it all in his head.  The feelings of the banquet crash into his chest and yet his expression remains stern at the screen.  His hand raises to his forehead as his thoughts raced.  “What does this…what does this mean?  Is he reaching out to me?”  That routine was not easy to learn, it took his blood, sweat, and tears out of him, yet that man who got 11th place was flawless as he performed it.  He finally realizes what those announcers had meant when he had been the one doing it, it’s beautiful when it’s someone fresh and young like him.

Next thing he knows, he’s getting his suitcase out of the closet, the phone ringing in his ear to call Christophe right on back.  “There you are,” he answers, “I was getting worried you had dove into the ocean to be with him.”

“I need to see him, Chris. I need to find him.”

Surprised there’s not a snarky remark to reply, “Oh, so you actually might be jumping into the ocean to find him.  Do you know how to reach him? You had spent an entire night together, after all.”

“I left before he awoke…and I think it frustrated him, he didn’t want to see me after I left him in the bed…”

“I don’t think I even heard what had happened that night, so you two got frisky and you dashed afterwards, I would be pretty heartbroken as well, Victor.”

“Christophe, he’s reaching out to me. He did my program, he danced my dance, and he was fantastic.  If he had any hatred of me after that night, he wouldn’t have done it at all.  Nonetheless post it all online for me to find.”  Chris can hear the sound of zippers as Victor packs the bag up.

If he’s going to support his friend in what he does, he decides he’d better do it now before they start sparking fires at each other.  “Do you even know where to go?”

“He wanted me to go to some hot springs in Japan!”

With a hearty laugh, Chris purrs into the phone, “That doesn’t narrow it down, let me ask, don’t you remember his friend from the afterparty? Perhaps he can help.  I’ll pull him into the call.”

That realization is perfect, he dances in place a bit. “Phichit!” He gasps, “I remember him! The boy with the eyeliner!”

The phone is filled with a familiar giggle, “That would be me!” Says a cute voice on the end of the phone, “Chris, it doesn’t sound like we’re alone, who’s the other number showing up on my screen?”

“That would be Victor,”  Victor almost hears a playful tone between the two as he’s packing up his bag, and he smiles a little at the words. “Help the little puppy out, he’s hungry for that Katsuki.”

Victor rolls his eyes and packs up nearly everything that will fit into his multiple suitcases, sure this will be a long trip.  There’s a knowing tone on the line, “Ah, I bet I can guess why you two would be calling me at this time.” Phichit laughs a little bit, “So you’ve seen the video.”

“And Victor wants to see him.”

“No.” He states to the pair flirting on the line, “I want to coach him.” He corrects, putting the phone on speaker and emptying his few hangers of those fancy shirts of his.

There’s a simultaneous “What” that comes from the phone, muffled as the speaker sits on the blanket.

“He asked me to coach him at the banquet, and I’m going to do it. I promised him.”

Christophe sighs into the phone, “He also played tongue tag with a silly straw for a half hour while drunk off his ass.  Don’t you have a performance you’re already training yourself for in the next Grand Prix?”

Phichit sounds very concerned on his end as well, “What if Yuuri’s not going to skate anymore? Coach Celestino hasn’t been able to get in touch with him since he left Detroit!”

With a deep breath, he gets the charger from the wall. “I know what I’m doing, and all I need to know now is where that hot spring is.  If you two will help me, then I know where to go from there. Phichit? You said you are his best friend, would you be willing to help me?”

While Chris had further intentions to protest, Phichit sounded overjoyed, “I’ll get you the info! I’m saving your number into my phone now!”

 

Yuuri rolls over in bed at the sound of his phone vibrating on the wooden surface of his nightstand, all the notifications that were coming in almost sounded like a hodgepodge of his training alarm that he set for the past five years, and he throws his hand at it with a frustrated and groggy groan.  However, as he looks to it to get the finger swipe just right, he’s only met with further buzzing.  He sits up and sees the messages exploding onto his screen. “…. what the hell?” 

The first thing he saw was the video, and all the self-care he had worked so hard on the day before was burned to a crisp.  A long screech comes from his hoarse throat and he immediately calls the Nishigori family up, they must have something to do with this, they were the only one there.  He’s only met with apologies from Takeshi, and he shakes from the neck down, the short phonecall ends as he stares at his wall. 

Yuuri wants to cry again, he’s so embarrassed that the world pretty much witnessed him fangirling over a celebrity, and that celebrity probably saw it too.  This was it, confirmation that he would never willingly step out in public ever again, and nobody could make him.

“Yuuri!”

**Dammit.**

His father calls from outside the door, “You can’t lay in bed all day. Come shovel snow off the walkway, it sprinkled overnight!”

The pact with his solitary life in his bed was broken.  Grabbing some clean pants, he gets a warm coat and squeezes it on his chubby body. “I’ll be a hermit later, Dad’ll try to do this himself and slip.”

 

 

Victor arrives to one of the entrances of YuTopia, looking up with a flutter in his chest, suitcases in hand and stacked.  Maccachin was sniffing everything he can while on his short leash.  Now what to hink, what to say…who cares anymore? He’s just happy to be here finally, quite tired from his plane trip.  Walking inside, he’s in love already with this place that’s so quiet and homey.

Mari is bringing out a tray of cups, setting them down briefly to pass them to the two other guests sitting and watching TV, her glance to victor is just quick…until she doubletakes to the man she’s unwillingly known about for years. _“oh shit.”_   Quietly she walks over.  “Good afternoon, I am Katsuki Mari, how can I help you?”

“hello!” He leans in to shake her hand, but then pulls back when he realizes he’s not sure how to greet certain people here. “I’m uh…Looking for two things. My name is-“

“Victor Nikiforov.” She states, “My brother has told me about you.”

That heart shaped grin on his face brightens, “Ah! Do you know where he is? He’s number one of the list!”

“And what’s the other?” Mari leans down to pet Maccachin, who licks at her hand lovingly.

“A room, I’m going to be here a while” Her eyes look over her shoulder to her parents, loving but clueless to this man, whose face has had a home on posters in their son’s room for ages.

She calmly bows her head, “Sure, let me take your bags, I’ll clear a room for you.  Would you like to await for it in the hot springs? Your dog can’t go in, but he can follow me around the house if you’d like.”

Victor seems a little disappointed at first, “I can do that, is your brother not around?”

“He’s doing chores right now, he’ll be in hopefully soon.” She nods to him, looking down to the poodle.

He nods, pets the beloved puppy, and bows his head politely, she hands him a robe and points him down the hall to the outside.


	6. Let me be your skates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So it finally happens, the two are destined to meet each other in bliss, but Yuuri's anxiety is making it difficult to believe any of this is real, and Victor's only hoping to meet him where he's comfortable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm trying to write like 12 other fanfictions as well as this one and guess who's nervous as heck about it. It me.
> 
> So I've been contemplating how to play Victor out in the writings here, worried that I'm not doing justice to his character, since I'm so much better at depicting characters with anxiety and depression. I hope you'll all forgive me. As always, my chapters aren't purely accurate to the real storyline!

Victor has a plan the moment he sees the relaxing hot pools just billowing with steam, in fact, he takes a moment to look around at the serenity that lay before him, making him feel at home already with just each little detail.  He’ll sit in the center pool, so he may present himself properly.  Not shy to the company in the property’s many springs, he sheds his comfortable clothes, folding them aside to make sure they don’t get wet.  He steps foot first into the center pool, like an instant, it was though he could feel every ache his body had ever gained, and he sinks into the healing waters. “Oohhh….oh my…..”  Unknowing of how stiff he felt from the plane ride, this was pure heaven.

_“Relaxing is a good idea before I do this, I’ve been so wound up the past twelve hours, who knows how exhausted I would have seemed to him.  Yuuri lives in this incredible place...Imagine how relaxed he is.”_

______________________________________________________________________________

 

Ah yes, our ball of anxiety is on his way inside, his coat just barely buttoned in the front, kicking the snow off his shoes at the steps.  Yuuri’s ready to hole up in his room and go back to sleep for the next 200 years, maybe 300 if he shut the blinds just right.  Those thoughts would have continued if he didn’t hear a familiar sound of panting from a friendly dog, and some hurrying nails clicking on the floor. “…Vicchan?” Turning around, he’s pinned to the ground by a big poodle who licks at his face excitedly.

Mari hears the crash and her attention flings to the doorway.  “…Yuuri’s back.” She figures she should be the one to tell him about the brand new company, who’s about the furthest from any expectation of the day.  Mari’s hands stop rolling hot towels and goes to the doorway, however, the moment she sees Yuuri, their father is before him talking.  From the depiction of absolute fear on his pale face, big sister can tell that the job has already been done.

Yuuri blasts past his father as he zooms down the hall and out the door, he might as well be screaming on his way out with the way he looks.

“Welp, I’d better make sure he doesn’t hit his head when he faints. Come on, Vicc-….I uh..I mean Maccachin.”

 

 

Yuuri skids out the door, his glasses already fogging up the moment he gets outside.  In his line of sight, the one and only Victor Nikiforov was sitting in the steaming pools, and their eyes met in an instant.

A smile creeps on the face of the Russian beauty, who stands in the water and holds his hand out dramatically, calling his host, “Katsuki Yuuri…” His valiant pose glowing in the water that dripped from his skin, he was stark naked and it was very difficult to resist looking him up and down.  “Starting today, I am your new coach, and you will win gold at the Grand Prix Final!”

There’s a silence, he really hopes Yuuri will speak, or cheer, maybe happy dance, at this point, Victor would be happy if he blinked.  Yuuri is a statue, fear in his eyes, and a lump in his throat that is killing any chance of him making a noise, replying, something. 

Eventually, he does move, in the form of a faint against the side of the house, _“He’s naked, so very naked…”_   He can almost feel his soul tear out of his body in an attempt to just die now.  Victor stares as he goes down, a bit surprised. He remembers Yuuri being much more excited to see him at the banquet, and though he didn’t expect more than a hug or some tears, he certainly didn’t expect fainting.

Mari opens up the door, too late to cushion the blow, walking on over. “I expected this.” Leans down and pulls her little brother’s arms around hers. 

While her back is turned to him, out of respect for Yuuri’s family, he steps out of the spring and puts on the dark green robe.  “I have to say, I expected a different way to celebrate that proposition, let me help you.”

“I’ve got him.” She was pretty strong, picking him up on her own. “What did you say to him?”

He steps back, noticing she’s more than equipped to pick her chubby brother up, “…I told him I want to be his coach, I’m going to help him win the Grand Prix Final.”

“…Yeah, that would do it.”

Victor looks over the two curiously. “Do you need any help?” She shakes her head and opens the door with one hand, pulling this dazed Yuuri in. “he looks a little different from the last time I saw him, is he ill?”

Mari doesn’t want to reveal the obsession that Yuuri’s had on this idol for so long, so she clears her throat, “Look, I think dinner may be ready, I’ll take care of you in a moment.” Hurriedly, she carries her little brother out the front door and sets him against the post of the entrance.  “Yuuri, come on, don’t start drooling…” She pats his cheeks, poking him a bit to get his attention back and focused.

The nervous Yuuri’s voice pipes between them as he focuses in, finally getting back to reality. “Aaaaugh, I-I can’t! I can’t see him!” His hands pull up to either side of his head and he shakes it, ready to have yet another nervous breakdown.

Mari frowns and takes hold of his hands, “Breathe, Yuuri…”

“H-How am I going to go talk to him? I can’t even believe he’s here! What if he saw the video? What if he feels SORRY FOR ME?”

“Yuuri, he’s here f-“

“He’s here FOR ME! He came to coach me.  He wants me to win the next Grand Prix Final.”

He continues shaking his head, wiping his eyes and looking up to the two women who he’s known dearly. “He can’t be interested in me…can he?”

“Little brother, he got on a plane and crossed water for you.  If you have any doubts of him wanting to know you and help you, you need to remember that he left home to find you, he brought his dog.  You know, the one you idolized just as much?”

Mari was right, he knew it.  His depression was making it difficult to believe, but this celebrity wouldn’t have cared, wouldn’t have made time for him if he really didn’t want to be there.

 

 

 

Victor sits down, peeking over his shoulder to the doorway in which the two siblings had left, and pouting a little bit.  If only he had a real answer on his proposition, then he’d be so much happier; the hunger has set in though, and when he turns his head, there stands Katsuki Hiroko, the cute chubby mother of the two that scurried away.  In her hands she holds a tray with food, and sets a bowl before Victor, what just seems to be a hearty broth with dumplings in it. “Here you are!” She nods her head gently and gives a wide spoon to him. “Must be hungry after your fly, get something warm to eat.”

A thankful smile appears on his face, “I didn’t think I was hungry until you gave me this.” With a bow of his head, “thank you very much for having me. Your home and spring are both very lovely!”

“Thank you! Where did you come in?” She asks in broken up English, though her son had mastered it and spoke well from early years, she was a little rusty on pronouncing things.  Victor was graciously able to pick up the words, the one language they had in common, and understood how difficult that language was. 

“I flew in from Russia!”

“Do you skate like my son, Yuuri?”

This woman definitely doesn’t know who he is like everyone else seems to, and it’s a little refreshing.  Small chatter and learning about a new friend is fun when the other person isn’t idolizing you, making you feel on a pedestal. “I do! I want to train him, help him realize how good he really is.”

Hiroko is excited, he can see Yuuri’s smile in her chubby cheeks and it warms him inside.  “Oh, wonderful! Eat, eat, eat. Please, you need food.”

With a gentle nod again, he uses the spoon to scoop up the soup, bringing it to his mouth.  Looking around, he notices that people are lifting up their bowl to hold beneath their chins instead of leaving it on the table, he takes after them and begins eating this way. “Vkusno!”

 

 

 

Thanks to Mari, Yuuri has calmed down quite a bit, deep breathing exercises have always been able to help him out, especially when someone would do it with him.  Stepping inside, he takes a deep breath, holding onto Mari’s arm nervously as he peeks into the dining area, only to be slightly relieved.  Victor’s asleep on his cushion, the plane ride had caught up with him, and he was passed out with Maccachin, an empty bowl on the counter before him.

Mari clears her throat, “Woops, I should have gotten his room ready a long time ago…Yikes. I’ll go do that now.”  As she makes her departure, Yuuri takes a seat at one of the cushions, but on the other side of the table from Victor, he felt nervous about what would happen if he accidentally awoke this man who wanted to be is coach.

Hiroko came in and kissed the top of her son’s head. “What a good friend you have, but he’s so tired, Yuuri.”

“Hm? Oh, gosh, I wonder why…is he alright do you think?” He looks to his mom a bit nervously on that, fiddling with his fingers.

Her gentle hum is heard as she walks around the room to pick things up, “He came in, he ate, and fell asleep!” She has a warm smile and picks up the bowls. “I think the plane made him tired, why don’t you make sure if he needs anything while staying here, that he has it?”

Yuuri nods and looks over the table at him. _“I can’t believe I’m staring at him with my own two eyes…and he wants me to get back on the ice, and to be his pupil..”_

The door CRASHES OPEN, where Minako stands, glaring down the room. “WHERE IS HE? WHY ISN’T HE ANSWERING HIS PHONE? WHY IS THERE NEWS OF VICTOR NIKIFOROV WANTING TO BE IS COACH?”

Yuuri waves his arms in slight panic to shush her, guessing she’s heard the news as his mother confirms the news, now having a name to put to this visitor. Mari probably texted his support crew.

“YUURI, DO YOU KNOW HOW INCREDIBLE THIS IS? IT’S ALL OVER THE RUSSIAN NEWS! He’s taking a year off to consider the future of his career and he chose YOU to be his protégé!  He came for YOU!”

Well, he hasn’t gotten that far yet.  He’s been too in awe of the video online to even think if he’d accept that proposal, and all was right, it was quite a big one.  “Well….I-I don’t even think I’ve thought of it completely.  I’d be taking away the most famous skater in the world and trying to replace him with myself, that’s not something I’m chomping at the bit to do.”

He looks over the table to the gorgeous man.  The man he’s had posters of, pictures on his desk, magazines galore, the one who inspired his love for skating and poodles and so much more.  The more he thought about what his answer would be, he knew his mind was reaching for ‘yes’ and his heart ached when he thought of refusing.  “….I accept.  I think…I think this will be good for me. I think with him as my coach, maybe something will change for me.  After all…what have I got to lose?”

With a sleepy sneeze, Minako and Yuuri gasp, the Russian beauty sits up and rubs his eyes.  He gasps, tensing up as he wonders what he’ll do next, for some reason, every angle of him is perfection.  “Hmng…Hungry..” He mumbles, nearly forgetting where he was.

Minako blinks, “Eh? Didn’t your mom just say he ate dinner alre-..”

“SURE, WE’VE GOT LOTS OF FOOD, WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE?” He blurts out, blinking nervously and flailing his arms like he was Kermit.

Victor is happy to see Yuuri figured out how to speak again, boy he’s got a lot more volume than he did earlier. “What is your favorite food? If I’m to be your coach, that’s something I ought to know, yes?”

“Eh?” He blinks, a bit of pink on his cheeks, feeling those words from earlier. He really was the luckiest skater on the planet, now that he thinks about it. “Oh! My mother’s Katsudon, it’s a pork cutlet bowl!”

Hiroko pokes her head in, “Did someone ask for Katsudon?”

“Yes! Yes! Victor would like to try some, do you have any bowls left? I could come in and make some.”

“No, no, it’s alright Yuuri, sit with your friend, I’ve got some still on the stove!”

And there it was, the most beautiful bowl of food that Victor had ever laid eyes upon.  A crispy brown cutlet, looking both soft and crispy at the same time somehow, drizzled with a hearty gravy and sitting upon an egg and some rice, some peas sitting in the mixture as well.  His blue eyes widened at the beautiful food, “Wow! Amazing!”

Hiroko sits down with the group, “This is our specialty!”

The moment he takes a bite with the chopsticks, his reaction melted, “Vkusno!” Scooping bites into his mouth, he can’t help it, it’s so delicious. “Really, there are no words! This must be what God eats!”

Yuuri doesn’t know how, but seeing Victor eating his favorite dish brings to reality that maybe it’s not so scary to have him around.  He’s a human being just like everyone else here at the spring, and he’s cheerful and sweet, he’s wanting to know more about Yuuri.  It almost reminded him of how scary it was to be back in Detroit, the first time he met the group of skaters at his rink, and how he worried he wouldn’t fit in. “I-I’m glad you like it so much, Victor!” Even saying his name felt a little easier.

Minako looks down her friend’s son, nudging him, “The rule is, because Yuuri gains weight so easily, he could only have it after winning a competition.”

_“Why Minako, why would you do that to me, oh god.”_

Victor looks up and dabs at his mouth with a napkin, “Oh really? Tell me, have you had a pork cutlet bowl recently?”

“Oh, yes! Lots!”

“But you haven’t won anything.” Welp, that seals it.  Yuuri definitely realizes how human Victor really is.  Outside of the rink, he even roasts like his best friends do. “There’s not much I can do unless you work off the lovehandles.” He winks and chuckles to Yuuri, who finds himself pulling his shirt down around his gut, suddenly very conscious that he’s gained a lot of weight these past few weeks.  “You need to get back to your weight from last year’s GPF at the least, or I can’t coach you~”  Minako was about to burst from laughter at this, the expression on Yuuri’s face was like a doll without emotion, absolutely annoyed but….he could understand why he needed to do so. “Okay, little piggy?”

_“I hope that name doesn’t stick.”_

Mari comes downstairs. “Hey, Yuuri. I know we’re entertaining a guest and all…but what are all these boxes?”  The room behind her is filled to the brim with them.

“Oh!” Victor waves to her, glad to see she’s back. “Those are mine, think you can take them to the room I’ll be staying in?”

“Say what now?”

“Oh yes, I’m staying here at the springs! Lots of time for my little piggy pupil.”

 

Yuuri starts helping his sister bring the boxes over to the banquet room, perhaps this was good for him to start the exercise and get himself taken care of there. Though if he had known there wasn’t going to be anymore cutlet bowls, he might have savored the last one very carefully. “Whew…that’s the last of the boxes..”

“What an adorable little room, is yours nearby?”

“Eh?” He kneels to line some boxes together.  “Mine’s down the hall on the other side of the house, I’m kind of a hermit away from everyone.  Also, sorry the room’s so small, it’s all we had available.”

Victor looks over his shoulder and smiles, admiring him with glasses.  _“I don’t know why I never realized the reason you squinted the whole night was because you couldn’t see! What a cute man~ I really am glad he’s agreed to all this…Maybe I should rekindle what we had back at the hotel….I know he really liked being cuddled up like that..and Phichit did say I was his favorite.”_

Seeing Victor so happy in this smaller room put him at ease a little bit, “We’ll defer my coaching fee for now until you’ve won something~” He winks, trying to be cute with Yuuri.

The poor little man blinks and thinks back on his bank account and wonders if he’s got enough savings from previous jobs for this crap.

“Now then~” He kneels down before Yuuri, his eyes looking deep to the brown ones, a smile holding his face still, “I want to know everything about you~” His hand gently strokes his cheek the same way as when they had first met, his gaze softening. “Like what rink you skate at, and what hobbies you have, if there’s a girl you like, let’s….” He strokes his arm with the other hand, “Let’s get to know each other~” He brings his face in close. “A relationship like this should be built on trust, don’t you think?”

With a squeal, he digs his feet against the wood to crawl back as quick as he can, his back hits the hallway’s wall, and he gulps. _“YUURI, WHY DID YOU RUN AWAY, HE’S BEING FRIENDLY. Maybe the face touching is a cultural thing, did you insult him? WHAT DID YOU DO?”_

“…Why do you run away?”

“uh…..Leg cramp.” Yuuri gulps. “I’ve….I gotta go down to my room, goodnight Victor!” He sprints off towards his room with his heart pounding nearly out of his chest.

“Y-…Yuuri?” Victor peeks out the door, just enough to see which door he goes into. “….The poor thing is shy, he must be so embarrassed.  I should at least make it easier for him, try to see if I can help him open up!” He takes his pillow out of his bag and goes down the hall, barefoot with the dog by his side, gently knocking on Yuuri’s door. “Yuuri! Come on now, let’s have a slumber party!”

_“this is perfect! It’ll be just like our hotel, except it’s better because I get to meet his family and learn more about him…and we’ll remember the night!”_

Yet there is only silence to the door, and after a few moments of knocking and talking through the door with no response, he gathers that Yuuri’s just in shock after today and needs to think for a bit, which is fair.  If he’s going to show all his care to this man, he’s got to be able to know where Yuuri draws the line.  For now, that is at his door, and he will respect that.


	7. Training day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor's first day of being a coach, and he's finding it a lot easier to get to know Yuuri, not as someone he met at the banquet drunk off their ass, but as someone who's at home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've gotten very fluffy about all this, I know my headcanon of makeup and heels Yuuri is not always widely accepted, but I'm going off of what my stripper friends tell me about life in the clubs.

 

Victor walks through the spring silently in the early morning, in his workout gear with his expensive sneakers, yoga pants, and a v-neck with a sweatshirt.  The rest of the world seems so quiet, and he’s quite happy for such a silent place, despite the fact that he misses some background noise, like the seagulls.  Stepping outside, he notices a shed by the side door, a bike sitting on the other side of the half open door. “Oh! Perfect!” 

It makes him think of what it must be like to bike through the cherry blossoms and enjoy this place, and he instantly thinks of Yuuri.  He’ll have to make a point to do that.

Speaking of Yuuri, he’s surprised to see his pupil is already outside, as he rolls the bike up front, he notices he’s stretching his legs to a full standing split while leaning forward to the bench before his home.   He smiles, “Someone’s eager! Out practicing for your coach, I’m so proud!”

“Hm?” Yuuri looks up from the split and switches legs in the process.  “oh, good morning, Victor. How was your first night in Hasetsu?”

Victor goes beside him and stretches as well, hoping to show some common ground that they’re both in for a workout.  “It was wonderful, I was very tired after the trip here, so I needed the sleep.”

“O-Oh…I’m sorry.”  Yuuri gets that feeling in his gut again and he wobbles in his split.

Looking up, he notices the nervous expression, “Hm? Oh, not at all, its’ not your fault.  I’m just getting used to the timezone difference here.” He takes note of Yuuri’s apologies, he makes them uselessy and after they’re made he seems even more anxious.  “Now, to begin today, you’re going to jog, and I’m going to ride that bike ahead of you.”

“Oh, you’re not running with me?”

“In spirit, I will be! I’ll ride the bike and you try to keep up! Come on Makkachin!”

_“oh boy, this’ll be fun…”_

______________________________________________________

Not only had he jogged, sprinted up stairs, and did skips around the rink, but Victor had one more exercise in mind for him before they went for lunch, he wanted to see him in his usual dance routines.  They were both power walking to the dance studio in town, and Yuuri was finally able to at least catch his breath and get his heart rate to a walking rate.  Glancing beside him, he can see Victor is getting quite the workout as well, having been beside him most of the way, it was comforting to know he stuck around despite the heart-attack inducing stairs. “So tell me, Yuuri, Minako owns the dancing studio?”

“Well, yes, she’s been my teacher since I was four.” Victor nearly squeals at the thought of baby Uuri learning to dance, he’s already so cute now, so it must have been unbearably adorable.

“Do you have a specific dance style you like?”

“Well, I know I’ve been pretty good at basic ballroom, not the best at tap, since I never use it on ice.  I’ve been using more ballet in skating than anything I think.” He answers honestly, thinking back on old routines. “Though….” He slows down a little bit on the sidewalk, looking around. “I have some form of dancing that I don’t really talk about much, but you should probably know, being my coach.”

Victor can guess exactly what’s on his mind, and he slows down as well, allowing this to let him talk.  “Oh? Why is that?” He has a knowing look on his face.

“Well…” He sighs and looks around once more, “I’ve gathered up a lot of expenses from my training and college and traveling, so I needed a wage paying job to catch up and keep myself from depending on winning competitions to fund it all.” He clears his throat, “Though I got more tips than wage…”

A hand slips onto his shoulder to try to comfort him, hopefully make it easier to say. “It’s alright, Yuuri, if you don’t feel comfortable talking about it, I can wait.”

“No! I think you should know now that we’re onto dancing…”

“If you insist…”

“Well….My friend, a fellow skater…he had a job that he thought I could benefit from.  He’s got quite a lot of skills of his own and he’s already paid for most of his college through it.  So he put in a request for me at a…strip…club.” Slowly his face reddens, getting quieter as he awaits the judgement from Victor, probably something terribly embarrassing to say.

Victor’s tone doesn’t judge, and his hand wraps around his shoulder to continue the comfort, “That takes a lot of skill, those dances take months to master!  Not to mention how hard it is to keep that quiet.”

There was a surprised look on his face as he hears those words, non judgemental words that calmed his nerves.  “Well…I was mostly worried it would get us in trouble with press, being famous skaters who are stripping for a living? Well, he had minored in cosmetology at his college and we wore makeup or lace veils or masks to keep our faces hidden.”

Phichit must not have gotten the memo to keep it on the downlow, though Victor wants nothing more than to call him and ask for pictures.  Imagine cute little Yuuri’s face done up in makeup.  Boy his fantasies were going to go crazy later.  “How long did you have that job for then?”

Yuuri has to think a moment, “Oh, about four years.  It still has an effect on my sleep schedule.  Takes me forever to fall asleep at night and I sleep in too often from it.”

“Does Minako know about it?  I think she’d be able to help your practice in it, that strength is useful in figure skating.”

There’s a moment of pondering, it was very useful to have that leg strength and he was at his highest point after doing it for a full two years.  “Well, maybe if we have time to talk about it, okay?”

“Right!” He nods, opening the door for him politely, hoping his smile shows support.

Yuuri blushes a bit as he steps in, he’s happy that he told Victor and there wasn’t a huge reaction from it.  Everyone seems to have negative views about strippers, and though it was scary at first, he did enjoy it for many reasons.  He was stronger from it, Phichit and himself never had to worry about money after that, he had a friend for support, and to be honest, he liked how he looked in some of the makeup and heels.

Minako looks over her shoulders to see them come in, just as she’s finishing up her class.  “okay kids! Let’s wrap it up!”

Waiting patiently, Victor looks to the corner of his eye _, “My~ he’s still smiling, I’m glad we’re getting to be a bit closer. And here I thought he wasn’t enjoying any of this._ ”  And Yuuri was feeling comfortable enough to stand close to him, he’s still fidgeting but it’s a step.

The teacher walks over with a smile, “Yuuri, you already look whipped, how’s the first day of training?”

Victor excitedly answers for him, which he doesn’t seem to mind, “He’s the best little piggy in all the land!” Okay maybe he minds a little bit.  “I’d like to see what a usual dance practice session is for you two, how he moves and all.”

Minako is excited, she loves this new coach-student relationship, mostly because it was so refreshing to see a new teacher for Yuuri.  “Okay, I can do that.  Katsuki, let’s get started!”

Victor would be sitting for all this, but he’s enjoying the new perspective of his dance lessons.  Yuuri seemed looser, he seemed to be in character the way he was on the ice, and the excitement in his stomach when he could see that enthusiasm at last is boiling over.  He sits with them to do stretches, he helps hold the skater in place for toe balancing, even some jumps, he demonstrates best ways to hold arms and make sure there’s less back strain.

In fact, it starts feeling more fun than anything , like this was a day of games and challenges.  Bumping into Yuuri, he giggles, “If we were pair skaters, you’d need a lot more core strength than that! You’d fall on your ass if I was trying to lift you.”

“You’re on, Victor!” He didn’t expect such an enthusiastic answer, “You lift me, but if you drop me, I get bragging rights.” His playful tone is refreshing.

Victor laughs and lays on his back, lifting his legs up, ankles locked together as Yuuri leans his stomach against his feet and pushes forward.  Using the balance of their bodies, Yuuri’s arms and legs are spread out in an intense pose, dramatic as it is skillful. Soon, they’re eye to eye, the younger skater holds this pose and stares his brown eyes into Victor’s blue ones, and yet it was like they’d known each other for years.  They were holding in their giggles as they wobbled a little, mumbling little things to each other playfully.  Victor can only think about their slow dance in the hotel lobby nearly three months ago, how they did the same thing, and he feels warm inside.  He feels his stomach fluttering, those same butterflies as before, as though they’d never separated at the airport.  It’s then he mumbles up to him something unexpected, “I knew you were incredible.”

Yuuri’s blush grows greater and he looks a little surprised, wobbling a little more and waving his arms in a fluster. “A-Ah!” He plops down on top of Victor, chests colliding and knocking the breath out of the pair. Minako can just be heard cackling in the corner from it.

“ВОТ ДЕРЬМО!” Victor coughs and tries laughing, his air is all out, he can’t laugh as loud as he wants.

Yuuri rolls off and starts bowing his head, screeching in embarrassment, “I’M SO SORRY, I’M SO SORRY, I CAN’T BELIEVE I FELL ON YOU, I’M SO SORRY.”

Victor is just trying to breathe in from laughing so hard, “M-My little piggy! You’ve broken me!”


	8. Anxiety in motion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting to know Yuuri is getting more comfortable, and Victor's noticing the differences from when they first met in every bit of him, and falling for each one. Yuuri is getting more comfortable with having someone help him be who he needs to be, rather than what everyone else thinks he should be.

 

Yuri slams his credit card down at the airport, the staff handing him the plane ticket as fast as they can without angering the Russian fairy, who seemed more like a fiery carnivore waiting to devour anyone in his way.  His cheetah print shoes might as well be stomping through the walkway, dragging his matching suitcase behind him with a grumble.

He couldn’t believe this had happened.  The man who had PROMISED to make his award winning routine was gone to do it  for someone else, and not only that, to the OTHER YUURI. He was seething with pure anger, so much so he’s radiating red heat from his face.  _“I can’t believe I have to go pick up that old fart like he’s a child.  How could he go after the pig like that when he’s on top of his game, especially after the douchebag got his stupid gay heart broken.”_   He sits down on one of the chairs by the gate, glaring at everyone going by, looking down at his phone.

Yuri’s fingers scrolled through the pictures from Hasetsu, seeing Victor running, biking, taking in the sights.  “Blech….Despicable, if Victor was as decent as any of his fans think he is, he’d deserve something much better than Katsuki.”

After about an hour of waiting, he finally gets on the plane, grumbling as he sets out for Hasetsu, ready to piss all over the country with hatred.

 

 

Victor is sitting in Yuuri’s room with him, they’re laughing about the day, talking about everything.  Yuuri was listening to Victor’s stories of how he got into skating because of his mother, who was quite the skater before him.  Yuuri told him about shenanigans that came with learning English while living in Detroit, using it in everyday things, like ordering fast food.

It was like being with Phichit again, a lot less selfies though.  “So, tell me, you said you used to wear makeup but I didn’t get a clear picture on how much or what kind.  You know how it is in the skating world, we wear a lot of weird things, Georgi is going to be a little eccentric with his soon with his routines.”  He bites into some popcorn and looks up to listen.

Yuuri is sipping some water and humming.  “Well, I don’t know what it’s all called, only how to put it on.” He reaches for his suitcase he brought home with him, pulling out a box with a mirror on it.

Victor’s eyes widen, he still has the makeup. _“Oh, please, if there is a god, give me this opportunity.”_   He has a big smile on his face and he leans forward a bit. “Think you could put some on me? I’ve never had anything too different than the foundation.”

“Oh! I could do that.  I used to help Phichit with his too.” Yuuri scoots on over, getting close to Victor, more comfortable and happy to do something that reminded him of some good times in Detroit.  “I gotta get your skintone right though, otherwise it won’t look right.”

“Of course!” He was thrilled to be doing something new, crossing his legs and beaming up to his new friend, who was so focused on the foundations in the box, his little tongue even poked out.  Victor thought he was going to melt at the sight of this, he’s so diligent.

Clearing his throat, “Okay, so I’m going to do your face, then I’m going to show you how I do it on mine.”

There’s a gentle touch on his face as Yuuri uses a thick chalky soft pencil to line his face, he feels like it’s not covering everything on his face, and that he’s wearing some weird tribal makeup from all the dots and stripes going all over his face.  Then comes some sort of powder, brushing his cheeks and forehead very lightly, but with a BIG brush.  He wants to peek his eyes open, but he’s afraid he’ll go blind from the powder covering his face, then comes the feeling of some sort of soft sponge.

Yuuri is matching the contour of his face, the cheekbones that were so prominent in his face were already sharp, so he wanted to make them look softer, rosy and handsome.  He had thought of what Victor would look with makeup before, mostly when he had to think of seduction in the club, what Victor would be like as a colleague on the stage.

He can feel the eyelash brush gently stroking his long eyelashes and curling with an eyelash curler.  He didn’t need the fake eyelashes in the case, anyone could see that.  Then comes choosing a shade for Victor, something innocent and light perhaps, he chooses a peachy pink to gently brush on his lips.

There’s a flash in Victor’s mind, the feeling of Yuuri touching his lips, what it must be like to kiss them.  The lipstick is soft, but he imagines the young skater’s mouth is even softer, yet hungry to kiss, like he would bite his lip tauntingly.  Yet as soon as the peach lipstick pulls away, he’s snapped back to reality and opens his eyes to the faux makeup artist stepping in for Phichit. “I think I got it right, I haven’t done it in a few months, so I’m a little rusty.”  He sets the brush down on a silicon mat, keeping it clean. “Now I’ll show you how I did it before you see how you look.

Victor already feels like he’s a stunner in this makeup, it’s almost like it makes him more powerful, like the lipstick makes his words more important than he already was.  His attention is drawn to Yuuri, who pulls out a bottle of foundation, already his skin tone, about halfway empty, and he pulls out the same kind of sponge, the weird thick pencil that was chalky.

The process doesn’t seem as long when Yuuri is doing his own makeup, using the mirror ahead of him as he blends everything in, puts the burgundy eyeshadow along his winged eyeliner, sticking on the eyelashes, putting on the dark red lipstick, everything was an art.  It was like a magical transformation the way Yuuri changed how his cheeks were shaped, how he combed his hair to just barely cover his eyes, the rest pinned back in a feminine way using bobby pins.  This man had definitely mastered this after four years of being in the profession. “…Yuuri, where the hell did you go?” He laughs, looking him over.

Yuuri finds himself grinning as he tries to finish up the last bits, glancing up to the Russian man with the comb.  “Now I have to fix your hair.  If you still had your long hair, this would be super fun, but I think I know what to do with you.”

“Oh~? Taking charge, my little piglet?” He can just barely see the blush under that foundation that Yuuri’s got on as he combs Victor’s hair and gently styles them to be straight bangs, then he gets a headband and gently sets it right behind the hairline where he can really make his face pop.

“There! Ready to look in the bathroom?” He looks enthusiastic, like he’d been holding back on talking about this lifestyle for him, he’s excited to have a friend to help him release all the changes in his life he had to keep secret.

Victor nods and stands up, walking over to the mirror and being amazed, it was like there was someone entirely new in the mirror that he never knew of before. “….Yuuri, is it possible for one to fall in love with themselves?”

“With you, perhaps.” Yuuri is still in the other room, and he stands from the bedside to walk over, except Victor hears the clicking of heels behind him instead of the bare feet they had been sharing just a moment ago.

He turns his head quickly to see the Japanese man has put on a pair of black pumps, he twirls in them a little bit, “Well, I’m a little wobbily, but tell you what, I’m still pretty good in them.”

Victor felt every inch of his insides crush together like shattering glass, his heart skipped a beat, his voice caught in his throat, everything with this man is a surprise.  Yuuri just laughs and plops back on his bed.  “You know, I’m really glad I can finally talk to someone about this stuff, Victor.  I mean, I had Phichit, but he’s not nearby anymore…And my family would probably have a very coordinated stroke if they found out I was doing this stuff…And not only that, everyone who does know makes a huge deal out of it and…”  His voice gets a little quiet again like earlier when he talked about it. “...Japan’s not as friendly to everyone as a lot of other places, cross dressing or men in makeup aren’t exactly treated as anything more than…well…porn here.” 

A warm smile lights up the pink lipstick on victor’s face and he walks over, “If it helps you be a better you, then I want to see more of that, okay little piggy?” He sits down beside him on the bed, his hand trails onto the back of his neck, his thumb in the black hair of his friend, gazing to him softly.

This time, the word ‘piggy’ didn’t bother Yuuri, he just continued smiling. “Wanna try the heels, Victor?”

“Are you kidding me, I’ll die.”

 

 

 

 

Victor has washed off all that makeup and fixed his hair back to his usual way, somewhat of a blessing since he’s worried of breaking out from all that makeup.  It gives him a chance to think about these past few days with Yuuri, where he’s suddenly met someone entirely new from who was at the banquet.  This man was gentle, shy, and so self-conscious, yet he was so determined to make the rink his canvas and to make the world see his art. 

 _“I had hoped coming here would rekindle some feelings, some sort of semblance of our night together.  Yet here I am, and he doesn’t seem to mention it at all.  Perhaps I had gone too far, perhaps he doesn’t even want anything to do with me.”_   Walking over to the window, he looks up to the moon, drying his hair from his shower, deep in thought.  _“Yet when we talk, he communicates how he feels…maybe he doesn’t talk about that night because he’s embarrassed?”_

There’s a gentle knock on his door, and he turns around. “Come in!”

The crack of the door reveals Mari, who has some fresh towels. “Sorry for coming so late, but I was up and had laundry to do. I brought you some fresh ones.”

_“…Just came up here at one in the morning to bring me towels?”_

Victor had a sense there was more than just that reason she was here, and his face stayed a warm and welcoming smile as he stepped forward, holding his arms out to take the towels graciously, “Why thank you! You work very hard, Yuuri tells me you’ll be th-“

“Don’t hurt him.” She states, interrupting his kind words, his words stop as he looks over to her.  Her cigarette in her mouth took a draw as the silence grew between them.

“Excuse me?”

She gently places the towels in his hands and looks up to him, “Yuuri’s been through enough.  I heard how happy he was today, you did a good job there… but if this is all some stupid publicity stunt, you pack your shit and leave.  He doesn’t need any more anxiety attacks over you.”

Victor couldn’t believe his ears, this woman of few words seemed so stern and sure, and all he did was nod to her, no words of his could reassure her, all he had to do was nod. 

Mari turns on her heel and walks out, not used to having to give that speech to anyone, let alone a man in her brother’s life.  Her nerves had risen up for Yuuri because she knew how easy it was to make him happy, and even easier to hurt him and take those smiles away.  She wasn’t always going to be around to take care of those anxiety attacks, she knew that, so someone had to be good to him when she wasn’t able to.

 

The door was left open, and he was standing in its wake, as though thunder had struck in his room alone and started to rain. _“…He doesn’t need any more anxiety attacks over me?”_   That was it, something was a trigger that night for Yuuri.  He didn’t talk about the banquet because he was upset, he was drinking away his sorrows, he wanted to forget all the horrible things that happened to him in his life.

Victor couldn’t tell if he was more relieved or hurt that he was part of that process.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello naughty children, it's angst time


	9. Back to the Ice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri's getting more eager to be in this new relationship with Victor, it's like he's blossoming into someone entirely new, someone happy

Now was the moment of truth, Yuuri had felt great about his progress and how with the routine that Victor had put together per day, the weight was melting off faster than either one expected in the past few weeks of being there, and he was aching to get back to skating.  Not being allowed on the ice kept him excited to skate, it forced him to focus on all the basic practices he overlooked the importance of before. 

Currently he was doing some squats in his room right before he’s to go out where his family waited.  Yet after a full on day of working out, he still feels like he could run a long distance, telling him that his resistance to tiring is getting stronger.  He always thought he had good stamina. 

It was difficult being one who gains weight so easily, but he understood that being fat and being fit weren’t always opposites.  After all, gaining weight during the competition this past year still allowed him to place and get into further competitions.

Victor knocks and with a booming voice, he plays announcer.  “And now presenting, Katsuki Yuuri! Will he make goal weight? Is he ready to be on the ice? DOES HE HAVE THE BEST COACH IN ALL THE LAND?” It makes him laugh as he grabs his water gallon he’s been using to keep hydrated and opens up the door, jogging in place as though he’s ready to step out onto a court of a basketball game. “And he’s still going!”

He passes Victor and goes to the main dining area, his family, the Nishigori family, and Minako all sit having just finished some desserts and visited a little later than usual just to see the event.  The nightly routine had become fun to see the progress that was being made, especially since Yuuri’s silly side rarely comes out anymore.  It was welcoming to see him shuffling on in, piggybacking the star athlete Victor on his back to show off his training progress.

The triples are already snapping away pictures.  Mari raises a glass, “Yuuri, you’ve gained 200lbs and it grew silver hair and a Russian accent.”

Victor gasps as he’s set down, “I’m not even 200!”

“I can feel it, tonight’s the night!” He rolls his shoulders, smiling to his biggest fans.

Hiroko gently sets down the old bathroom scale, sitting back and leaning against her husband, “Go get it, honey!”

Takeshi booms, “Drumroll please!” Before patting his  thighs, hyping up the rest of them to join in.  Yuuri steps on with a smile, watching the numbers wave around the plastic needle.

The needle stops on… 184… Victor looks down and frowns.  “ooh…sorry Yuuri, you’re just a few pounds over.”

The look on Yuuri’s face was as if he’d been betrayed, the scale must be broken, or evil, or plain just plotting against him.  “How? I didn’t lose anything these past few days if that’s it!”

“I’m sorry Yuuri, sometimes when you exercise in the ways we’ve been doing, you plateau and stop losing for a while.  We’ll have to do a few more stair runs tomorrow for good measure.” He pats his back. “Or maybe less rice with dinner?”

Mari eyes Yuuri and she points to him.  “Maybe it’s water weight…literally.”

The attention in the room goes to the big gallon of water hanging from his fingers.  He quickly tosses her the water, and she fumbles before catching it properly, and he looks back down to the scale nervously.

Victor looks down. “….179! Yuuri! You made it!”

The whole room erupts with applause as Yuuri hugs his coach, burying his face into his shirt and hopping in place.  He’s cheering but it’s quite muffled as he feels the strong arms wrap him up, and he suddenly pulls back bashfully. “Ah! Sorry! I was just…excited.”

Victor hums, having been more than excited to get to hug him for something that wasn’t stretches.  “I would be too, tomorrow we skate.  You should get some rest. I’ve got big plans for you in the morning.”

He doesn’t even know how he’ll sleep tonight, all he does is bow his head to the company in the main dining room, “Goodnight Everyone!”

They all wave back to him and giggle at the whole even, Victor sighs and looks to them all, holding up his glass. “My little piglet’s all grown up.” He jokes, “To Yuuri!  


 

 

The triplets are holding back crowds, the reporters had finally caught up to Victor and were surrounding the rink, so the kids were in charge of making sure nobody came in for the private practice about to happen. 

“Stay back!”

“The rink is reserved!”

“Please purchase our photo books at the end of each week, no private cameras allowed!”

Though the six year olds were not the best at keeping everyone out, they did their best and usually their parents helped direct them away if someone made it through the child barrier.  A cheetah printed teenager slips through without care or regard for anyone else around him, dragging a matching suitcase behind his string bean legs.

“Hey! You can’t go in-…….THERE???” They all three look up as the blond young man glares down at them, as if he were daring them not to let him pass.  “Yuri Plisetsky!” They squeal in reaction, the reporters went nuts at the sight of him, cameras flashing uncontrollably.

Yuuri is jogging to the rink, huffing his last lap before his first day on the rink, a warmup that was Victor’s idea, and as he passes through the small crowd, he leans on the door for a moment, “Finally….”  The three small girls look past the other Yuri, who is shaking with fury at the sight of him, nonetheless he had not even noticed he was there. “Hey girls! Victor’s finally going to let me ska-!!!” He’s interrupted by a full on swing of a spindly leg, what felt like the force of a train crash into his back sent him flying through the glass doors and tumbling to the skate rental counter.  He collides into it and flops onto his back, the wind knocked out of him.

A shoe is pressed on his forehead and a growl, so familiar to a few months’ prior, is aimed at him.  It was the equivalent of being face to face with a starving carnivore.  “It’s all your fault,” He says to him, digging the sole against his face, “APOLOGIZE.”

Yuuri can feel the fear he felt in the bathroom stall at the Grand Prix Final, it jumps in his chest, and he finds himself apologizing without any control, something he was quite good at. “He promised me FIRST that he would choreograph a program for me, a WINNING program, and then he goes off and takes up with a fat pig like you.”

Well, he couldn’t decide which part of that sentence hurt the most, instead he just continues to lay on the ground in case it’s not safe to stand up quite yet. “W-We haven’t even talked about programs yet!”

Slowly, he begins to stand, rubbing his face and the back of his neck which seem more sore than the rest of him, but his words look to have angered the teen. “What??  Oh my god, no wonder you need a coach, you haven’t even gotten your program planned yet.  Does he know you like to cry into bathroom stalls like a little bitch? Think he’d want to coach you if he found out?”

Something within him is different than the final, he realizes he’s looking down at Yuri instead of cowering at him.  _“He’s….like twelve, why the hell was I scared of him? He’s underestimating me, all because I made him jealous over Victor!”_   He must have had a smirk on his face, because the animal printed jacket inflated as Yuri huffs.

“Wipe that smile off your face, fatso.”

 _“Oh my god, he’s an infant.”_   Yuuri even resists a chuckle at the realization.  “Well, why don’t you talk to Victor yourself?”

After a few weeks of being with Victor, something he had come to realize is how he knew he wouldn’t have wanted to be his coach for no reason, how he dedicated an entire year, possibly more, just for Yuuri. This angry man child couldn’t handle that.

As he led him through the door, Yuri looks up to see Victor practicing some familiar moves, for an upcoming program he was planning for the next year.  “…That’s his new program he was going to do for the Grand Prix Final this year.”

“Huh?”

“Victor was already putting together programs for next season.  He had some conflict on the style he wanted to do, and how he could surprise the audiences…maybe that’s why he came to see you, because the only surprise someone would have from the old man next was if he was training a nobody like you.”

Those words stopped hurting, this must be what it’s like to have an annoying little brother who learned swear words at an early age.

He takes a deep breath, “VICTOR, OLD MAN, WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?”

Victor looks up, a cheerful smile on his face. “MY SON.” He taunts, putting his hands on his hips.

“FUCK OFF, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?”  The silver haired man slides on over, chuckling a little.

He sips a water bottle, “I’m surprised Yakov let you come, based on that look on your face though, I’m guessing I forgot some sort of promise I made you.  Was it gum? I don’t have gum.”

There was a gasp in his throat, all this time, Yuri thought that the great Victor Nikiforov was taking his time in carefully arranging a strong program that would suit this debut out of juniors and into the big leagues, when in all this time there wasn’t even a thought to it.  “…You. Promised. Me. A. PROGRAM.” His voice cracks in more frustration, stomping forward.  “YOU PROMISED THAT IF I WON WITHOUT USING QUADS IN THE JUNIORS, YOU WOULD CHOREOGRAPH A PROGRAM FOR ME.”

Victor looks blank in the face, blinking between the two. “It sounds like something reckless I would promise.”

“You’re coming back to Russia and you’re going to leave this PIG behind!”

Yuuri feels that anxious lump in his throat rise, a buzz in his chest was either his heartbeat or his ribs knocking around from nerves inside.  His big brown eyes suddenly growing more puppy-like, and more like he may well up in tears if he’s not careful. 

Most of it hurts because Victor looks thoughtful, for the first time, he has to think about it.  “Hmm..” His thoughtful hum leaves him on the edge of his seat. “…Okay! I’ve decided!”  The two seem to tense up, and still as can be stare down Victor for the answer.  “Tomorrow, I’ll choreograph a program for each of you to the same music I was planning for my next season.”

“What?” Yuuri gasps, the first time he’s said anything in this decision.

“The same music as this fatso?!” Yuri screeches, stomping a foot.

There’s a knowing look in those blue eyes, “There’s many different arrangements to this piece, two in particular I’ve been conflicted with specifically.  You’ll each get one!  You’ll each get it one week.  In the meantime, it’s workout time for the both of you!”

Neither one liked that answer, Yuri was angry that he was having to stay here an entire week just to get the damn program.  And Yuuri was back to another week off the ice, he was hungry for it, hell, he was _starved_ to get back onto the ice.

“Then what? Are you going to come back to Russia and stop playing house with this asshole?”

“You two are going to compete for my affections~” He muses, giggling as he brings it up, watching the look on their faces as they look even more distraught than before.  “You’ll compete, and whoever wins, I will do as you please.

Yuri points at him immediately, knowing this full on window of opportunity, “You’ll come back to Russia, you will choreograph everything, you’ll BOW before me before the whole rink, and more if I can think of it!” He shouts, interrupting so it echoes through the whole rink.

Victor looks a little surprised but grins through it all.

“Fine!  A competition unlike Hasetsu has ever seen!”


	10. Filler episode

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Essentially the title.

That night, the trio are on their way into the springs, as Yuri has insisted in the most violent way he can that he’s going to be staying there as well.  Looks like the springs will be in business for the next 100 years from all the stars that are so easily swarming into this business.  “Where’s my room?” The punk asks, glaring over to him.

“Oh, right….er…My sister and I will have to set that up.”

“Well then do it, and get me some food, I’m starving.

Victor laughs and rubs his blond head, “Little kitten, you’re too feisty, even moreso being here than at home.  Someone missed me!” He pokes a little

There’s a flail of arms and some slapping against victor’s chest with teenage fury, “BITCH YOU THOUGHT.”

Yuuri walks into the other room, “Mom? Dad? There’s a new guest, do we have any rooms?”

Hiroko is cooking the specialty katsudon, looking over to them. “Hm? Oh of course! Just in time!  I was about to give it to one of those reporter fellas who was sitting around here.”

…Yeah, he definitely came by at the right time, he couldn’t handle a reporter sticking around his home.  “Mind if I get one of these bowls for the guest?”

“Okay, so long as you don’t get a bite, you remember what Vicchan said about eating those!”

He groans a little bit and picks up the bowl, taking it out to the dining area.  “Okay, um….Yuri, here’s some food. It’s a pork cutlet bowl.”

“So the pig is giving me a pig bowl.”

“Yup, that’s me.” He sets it down before him, sitting down with him and Victor. 

They sit awhile, talking, up until his sister came, had a weird fangirl moment about a band, and suddenly all they were doing was calling a certain Russian kitty, “Yurio” .  What a strange nickname, and it oddly fit. 

“Yuuri! The storage room isn’t even clean, if he’s going to be staying there, we should clean it.” She frowns and starts up the stairs from the hallway, he sets down his bowl of some strange food Victor instructed for him, and stands up.  He then goes to help his sister out with the boxes in the storage room, his ears are caught by Victor’s voice though before he can turn.

“Yurio.”  He states, “If you keep eating like that, I’ll have to put you through a workout regime like I did for Yuuri!”

“My name is not Yurio!”’

Yuuri’s chest tightened again, that familiar doom that often filled him before a competition.  How victor grinned and laughed beside Yuri, he had forgotten selfishly that his coach had obligations, friends, a career, all back in St.Petersburg.  How could he steal him away?  That life was so wonderful, being loved and supported so much, and then leaving it for a fat pig.  With a gulp, he grabs his coat off the rack, running out of the side door, he needed a distraction.  Luckily, Hasetsu had a million of those.

Anxiety has a habit that not many talk about, how addicting it can be to cope in certain ways, even if they were unhealthy.  Yuuri’s way to cope was to distract himself, and then the anxiety would overflow, it would make him break at the smallest things.  Today it was Victor’s laugh.

 

Victor lays on his stomach, relaxing on the cushion beneath him.  “I tell you, you’re going to get a tummy ache!”

With stuffed cheeks, Yuri shovels the rest of food into his mouth. “Don’t talk to me like you’re my father.” Chews a bit and leans back.

“My son!” he repeats as he did earlier, only to get a cushion to his face, rolling back and laughing at his own joke.

“You made a stupid choice, dropping everything like that.  Yakov’s had his angry forehead vein popped since you left.”

Victor sits up, though he cares for those he had at home, he knew if they were really important that he’d be able to go away to take care of what he needed to, and able to come home to at the same time.  “Well, stupid or smart, it was my decision, wasn’t it?”

“Well…”

“And I’m owned by nobody but myself.” He continues to chuckle.

Yuri puffs some air out of his bangs, looking away.  “Don’t preach to me, Victor.”

“If you win, and I am your coach, you’ll hear a lot more than that, Yuri.”

 

 

Running like he’s running from some sort of monster in the night, Yuuri feels like his heart’s going to stop if his legs do.  How could he not realize the fact that he’s being so unbelievably selfish?  The entire world is going to be against him, they’re going to tear into him into shreds, he’s never going to survive life after being the pupil of a star like this because he’s taking away the one they love.  

 _“How could I?”_  The words in his head are so calm, despite the fact that his heavy breath almost sounds like dry sob and feels like it’s barely escaping from him.  _“What if he goes back? Will I even go back to compete?”_  He only wanted to be one place, on the ice.  This was the only distraction that could keep him from hurting this way much longer, he needed to isolate himself, to be distracted.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Victor sits up and looks around with a smile, “Yuri, if you’re staying here, you should at least help with your luggage. I’m sure Mari has finished cleaning upstairs for you.”

“Why should I? Did you carry your own luggage?” He spits back, texting and grumbling to the silver haired man, who laughs in return.

“Don’t be silly, Yurio!” He notices, in his scan around the room, Mari is bringing inside some towels from outside.  _“Eh?  I could have sworn she and her brother had gone upstairs to clean that storage room…where did he go?”_   Clearing his throat, he greets her.  “Mari! Where is Yuuri? Is he still cleaning upstairs?”

She shakes her head in return, picking up some towels nearby as well. “Yuuri left a while ago.” He frowns a bit, though he had the trust in his friend to take care of himself, he was still a little concerned that he didn’t see the Japanese young man offer to get anything while he’s out like he usually does.

“Did he mention where he was going?”

“When he’s nervous, he usually goes to see Minako.  Or goes to the rink.”  She glances up to Victor, a knowing look.  She could only do so much working in this Onsen, and running after her anxious brother could leave her parents without their employees, but her voice reached out to the Russian.

Victor knew exactly what he needed to do, he needed to follow after him.


	11. Queeriocity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a chapter about Yuuri's insecurities with his sexuality, how being open with his best friend for five years suddenly went to nobody else knowing about it. It's hard to push all that down, especially when it comes to your crush becoming your coach all the sudden.

Victor pulls the poodle along on a leash, and he’s sniffing everything in sight on the way out of Minako’s, who has told him to check the Ice Castle. This running away when he’s upset had to be remembered, and though it may just be nothing, it’s still worrying him that he’s unable to discuss how he’s been frustrated. Though he’s personally unbothered by Yuri’s endless salty spew, sometimes he forgets other people can be hurt by what he says. Victor hasn’t been around Yuuri with a nervous breakdown, not yet anyway, but he can feel the anxiety radiating from the younger man, and can sense there’s bound to be one from him someday.   
His own nerves could be calmed with a good support team, or a drink, and he didn’t have many of those issues to begin with. He was top of the world at age 14, half a life away, and he’s always had loving family and friends and could afford therapy and care for himself. Those friends were close and loving, and though he and his family weren’t particularly the same, he didn’t mind. Panic was a stranger to him, anxiety was stronger than he could imagine, and yet he wanted to do everything he could do to help.  
Some movement on the beach caught his eye, and he snapped out of those dizzy thoughts preoccupying, his chest lightened in anticipation that it might be Yuuri. Though he was disappointed, there were some kids with sparklers running around, giggling as they scurried about around the sand hills. His smile returned at how carefree they were, perhaps he’ll have to try that with his pig and kitten. After all, they think they’re as mature as they can be, but they’ve got so much life to live.  
He makes it to the Ice Castle, knocking on the glass door, Yuko looks up front to those doors, having been cleaning the counter. She rushes right on over to unlock them. “Victor! I was wondering when you’d come by.”  
“Is Yuuri here?” He adjusts his coat, getting straight to the point. She nods and closes the door behind them. “Good.”  
Leading him into an alcove beside the rink, surrounded by windows, her husband is already there. Watching Yuuri from behind the glass pane windows. “What is he skating?” He half expects to see his own routine, but as he looks, it’s Yuuri’s step sequence for this past year.  
“His old one, Coach Celestino put this together.” Takeshi looks a little disappointed in it.  
This confuses the Russian one, Victor is surprised to be able to recognize it at all. The GPF felt like years ago after his time in Japan, surely Yuuri should be practicing something fresher, or working on his jumps. “Has Yuuri ever choreographed his own skate? Something he’s particularly passionate about?”  
Yuko shakes her head, “He tried one time, I think his coach turned down the music, and Yuuri just went along without a fight.” She looks concerned, watching him with her arms crossed. “he always comes here to practice when he’s nervous, even ever since he was a little kid. The ice used to make him so much…happier…so confident…”  
It was a spark of realization that warmed Victor in that moment. His hand came to his cheek as he leans against it, watching Yuuri skate away, “So that’s it, I have to turn my piglet into a prince.”  
“Excuse me?”  
With a wave of his hand, he smiles, “Would you two do me the favor of making sure this place closes on time? I’d at least like to help him get some sleep by forcing him to come home.” He turns, petting Makkachin’s head and humming on his way out the door.

Yuuri sped up on the ice, knowing fully well his salchow wasn’t going to work at this speed. The moment he lifted off the surface, he braced himself to fall, no assurance to his internal self that he could actually make the jump. That impact came, he didn’t even try to land it. The thud that echoed was one of many as he tried recreating what he was supposed to do, but he anticipated the falls each time.  
Part of his mindset was telling him that’s all he’ll ever do, and another part says he’s not good enough to even try, but he jumps anyway, even when he lands on his side. Every tone of voice in his head is saying the same thing,   
“You’re only keeping him because you like him.”  
“You’re so selfish”  
“How could you steal him from everyone he loves?”  
“Everyone was right about you.”  
Takeshi calls from beside the ice, “Yuuri! We have to close up!” He holds up the blade covers. “The girls have school in the morning!” Yuuri looks up as he’s mid jump to hear his friend, and with the distraction, he lands on his skate blade this time, a little wobbily, but having been able to do it. “Woah! Hey, you landed it, Yuuri! Didn’t even touch the ice.”  
He was panting from his practice, standing and sliding on over, holding his hand out for the blade covers. “Heh…I did…sorry for keeping you.”  
“No problem…you must have really missed the rink to come by at dinner.”  
“Well, I haven’t been on it in a few weeks…Victor didn’t let me skate until I lost weight, then the other Yuri came by…”  
Takeshi frowns, “Plisetsky? You mean the child?” He pats his shoulder. “Even my girls could handle him, Yuri.”  
He nods in response and gathers his laces in his fingers, loosening them gently. “He’s not what I’m scared of, Takeshi, Victor is.”  
“….Oh hell yeah, fear the hell out of him.”  
“…Thank you, you should really think of opening a practice, Dr.Nishigori.”  
“Nah! Nah!” He waves his hand, “I mean you need to let that fuel you, that fear!” Okay, that made more sense. “He came out here to see-…No, he came out here to be with you. If that’s not indication that it’s so much bigger than your fear of him, maybe you have to make that drive you harder.”  
Yuuri nods a little, putting his skates into his duffel bag in their own special compartment, then slinging it up onto his shoulder. “I’ll try that, thank you.” He didn’t sound terribly convincing.  
“Yuuri….” He puts his hand on his shoulder. “Is this….for…well…non-skating reasons?”  
There was an anticipation that filled Yuuri, goosebumps go all over his arms, a lump swells in his throat. “Ah…uh…well…” A blush goes across his face and he tightens his grip on the bag. “…Y-Yes….”  
Then his old friend smiles a little, “Yuuri, it’s not like it was in school. You’re in a safe place to be open about it. Especially here in the rink, you know Yuko and I have always tried being as supportive as we can to you.”  
“It’s different, Ta-“  
“I know. You don’t like to talk about it much, but you’re in a different kind of situation and we worry about you. Your childhood crush is here, he’s teaching y-…”  
“Please.” Yuuri squeaks, looking up to him. “I….I know it’s not like it was in school, but…nobody else knows about me being….well…” Even at home, he still can’t bring himself to put much of a label on it. All he can think of is different.  
“Okay.” He simply responds. “Why don’t you head on out and have a good night?”  
With a nod, Yuuri says his goodbye to the Nishigori family, and hurries out of there. It feels like the fresh air is going to drown him the moment he steps out. Yuko and Takeshi may be the only people in Japan who know about his sexuality, or as they liked to joke in high school, his queeriocity.  
Japan was quiet when it came to the queer community, where one could only be open in certain places. Designated gay places. Bars and pride parades were mostly the hot spot for those destinations, and for a man who is very well known and represents a tiny town with the burden of bringing it business and attention, he’s stressed about it. Sometimes his father will mention something about a girl in town to him, and he holds his tongue, the same as when his mother mentions how he’ll have a wife someday. He wasn’t sure he could tell Mari either, mostly because talking about sex to your sister isn’t the most affectionate way to talk to family.  
Stepping inside quickly, the springs are in a quiet lull, and Yuuri sneaks down the hall into his room, setting his bag down. It doesn’t sound like anyone’s awake, which is exactly what he’s wanted. Pulling his phone out and getting the right number for the one he felt most comfortable talking to, Phichit’s face lit up the screen on his phone as it rang.

 

Phichit is talking to Christophe on his laptop, the two are chatting it up in a video screen, laughing at each other and little bits of flirting back and forth to each other. “Come on now, say it again, Christophe~….” He whines a little, biting his lip as he gives those big puppy dog eyes.  
The blonde laughs and gives a kissy face to the camera, “du är söt.”  
”Again!”  
”This’d be the twelfth time, Phichit! Hey, is your phone buzzing over there?”  
The Thai skater turns his head from being covered in his blankets and pillows, his phone is buzzing away while plugged into the wall, sitting on his nightstand. ”Oh! Thank you!” He sits up. ”...Chris, it’s Yuuri! I haven’t heard from him since we sent Victor off for him.”  
”Oh, lovely, can’t wait to hear how he’s doing.”  
He swipes the phone button on the screen, ”Yuuuuuuuurrrriiiii!”  
”H-Hey Phichit!”  
”How are you? I miss you! Detroit’s missing you too!” Instantly, Yuuri’s a little relieved, the friend he knew he could always depend on doesn’t sound busy. ”Wait a minute, it must be late where you are. What’s up?”  
”Um....are you alone?”  
Phichit looks to his laptop screen and leans forward, putting the mute button on. ”Yes, I’m alone. Are you alright? Is it drunk call time? Because I can join in, I’ve got beer.”  
”N-No....I’m sober, I just miss you is all.” His voice cracks.

Phichit notes this on his end, and he notices message buttons are popping up on the skype screen as he talks with Yuuri.

Rockhardicepapa88: How is he? What’s going on?

Hamstercutie<3: Hold on he needs me private

”Yuuri, you don’t sound okay..what’s wrong? Who do I need to beat up?” He luckily recieves a little chuckle from that.

Rockhardicepapa88: I thought I was your only private man ;)

Hamstercutie<3: u dirty. U know what I mean.

Yuuri’s voice sounds like it’s holding back, and he can hear him trying to breathe through that. ”D...Do you remember how open we were together when we were roomies? The...uh....preference...issue?”  
There was an immediate understanding.

”...Is it your family?” There’s a silence. ”...Is it about Victor?”  
”Y-Yes...” He whimpers into the speaker, unsure.

”Talk to me, Yuuri.”

”I-I’m selfish.” he’s cuddled ot his bed, and Phichit can hear the blankets sliding around on the speaker as Yuuri gets comfortable. ”I’m letting my feelings try to convince the rest of me that Victor wants to be here.”

”But he does, Yuuri, you didn’t force him to come to Japan.”

Rockhardicepapa88: lol hard

”I didn’t refuse him as my coach though.”

Phichit stands up from his bed and goes into the kitchen to get a drink, ”Who says he wouldn’t have taken a break from skating competitively whether you accepted his offer or not?”

There was a good point, ”Well...”

”Victor is with you because he wants to be.” He pops the cap off one his drinks. ”Yes, you like him, you want to be his, and that’s okay.”

There’s an audible gulp, ”You think so?”

The young friend smiles bright as though Yuuri can see it through the call, ”Yes, what if he lieks you too? Maybe more than one thing drew him to Hasetsu.”

A sarcastic laugh busts out from the speaker. ”He could have anyone he wanted, why would he come here?”

Phichit walks into the bedroom, ”Because he wants that ass, Yuuri.”

”Phich!” There’s a little more gusto that goes into his laugh. ”Stop!”

Rockhardicepapa88: Wait what.

That’s what he wanted, to make his friend laugh. He sets his drink on the bedside table. ”Just keep protection on you, I can’t have you getting pregnant before the Grand Prix Final. I don’t want to be remembered as the one who beat the pregnant guy, it’s not going to look good as the first Thai gold medalist.”

This time, the two were laughing so hard, they didn’t do anything but for the next few minutes. ”Th-Thanks Phichit...You made it a little better.”

”You bet I did, you go to bed, Victor might get mad if I keep you up too late.”

Rockhardicepapa88: You can keep me up all nite bb <3

”Goodnight! You’re the best, sleep tight.” He hangs up and turns the mute button off on Chris, who is laughing hysterically. ”You asshole!”

Christophe was waving his tongue around, ”Come now, you like seeing me do the tongue thing.”

”Not when I’m consoling a friend!”

He’s still doing the tongue thing as Phichit argues back at him. ”What if I lick your butthole while you console your friend, is that a kink?”

”You’re a dick, Chris. ”He chuckles and shakes his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sexuality is a big subject to talk about, I did some research on what it's like in Japan for those in the queer community and I put in some of my own feelings with my own sexuality, it takes a lot of guts to be able to talk about.


	12. I knew it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baby's first fight, aw

It was early, the town was quiet as if it were just waking up, yet there were three skaters more awake than anyone gently gliding to one end of the rink. The eldest of them all smiling to them with a small remote in his hand, he points to each of them. “I’ve thought about these routines far longer than either of you know, I’ve been working on them for the past six months actually, trying to decide which one I wanted to do for next season. That is until I decided my time would be better suited beside Yuuri.”

There was a glare from the blonde fairy, and the daggers were already stabbing into Yuuri’s face from ten feet away, he shrugs his shoulders up and crosses his arms as if a turtle trying to escape the moment. Still feeling some effects of last night’s much needed talk with Phichit, the guilt still sitting in his gut that he shouldn’t accept the coaching offer based partly on his feelings.

“Well, that’s a big crock of shit, now are you going to play it or what?”

Victor nods and turns to the mini speakers that sit on a table beside the rink barrier. “The two songs I’ve chosen for this are the same song. But there are many variations of it, I’ve had two in mind for a while, but these stand out to me the most.” With a click, the music that seems to fill every corner was a sweet voice, the airy churchlike tone chilled every nerve and was almost childlike vocally. There’s an organ in there, a cello, and altogether with that voice was what felt like a choir’s chant in a cathedral. “In Regards to Love: Agape. What do you two think of when you hear this?” 

Yuuri is the first to answer, “It’s very pure, but deep. Innocent.”

“It’s boring.” Yuri sticks his tongue out at it, “What else do you have?”

Victor looks amused, and he clicks the remote to the speaker again, which is followed by a carefree strum of a spanish guitar, and then a violin, a level of sexual tone fills the large room. The moment it starts to play, Yuuri feels like dancing, it just had that way of making the body want to move, to drive a person to be excited. “This one’s…less innocent, kind of…Sexual?”

“I want this one.” Interrupts the youngest, crossing his arms, “Old man, I choose this song.”

Yet the eldest still looks amused to him, as if he’s going to burst into laughter hysterically. “This is, In Regards to Love: Eros. Agape and Eros are not exactly opposites, but they’re definitely not the same. Two different kinds of love, Unconditional and pure, and Passionate and Sexual.” Points to Yuri, “You’re getting Agape,” then to Yuuri, “And you’re getting Eros.”

They immediately jump into a chitter of frustration, disputing every bit of it. “I DON’T KNOW HOW TO BE EROS, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?”

“WHAT THE FUCK, OLD MAN, I SAID I WANTED THE OTHER ONE.”

This time, he really does laugh, Victor swings his head to the side to move the silver hairs that lay before one of his eyes. “Ah, you two are so cute, do you really think either of you have a choice?” They quiet down, looking up to their potential coach. “If either of you were so great, you wouldn’t need me to tutor you. You have to do exactly the opposite of what the world expects of you, and that means you’ll do what I say.”

Yuri growls and points at him, “This had better be a winning routine, Victor.” He’s met with blue eyes piercing into his green ones, and a devilish smirk.

“Why, my cute little kitten, it’s up to you if it wins. After all, if I skated it, I’d win without hesitation.”

Yuuri is silent, still trying to understand how he’ll play Eros, he’s never had to bring sensuality onto the ice before, and he has no props to make himself more sexual like he would at the strip club. There’s no pole, no heels, and there’s no way in hell he’s going to wear all that makeup on the ice without turning some news reels flying. All he can do is clench his fists. The feeling in his chest wasn’t nerves, it wasn’t fear, it was fury.

“You’re both in this competition for your own reasons, I’ll be at the whim of either one of you.”

Yuri wastes no time in claiming the first stake, “You’ll come back to Russia and be my coach when I win.”

Then Victor turns his head to the other party, a smile on his face. “And if you win?”

Yuuri looks between the two, his voice catches in his throat, he wants to beg Victor to stay in Japan, to confess everything he’s been feeling since he got here. All he can say is, “P-Pork cutlet bowl.” They blink at him. “I…” Yuuri, what the fuck are you doing, you have to say something else. “With you.” You fatass, say something, confess! “I want you to eat pork cutlet bowls with me.” …Better, I guess?????

But the look on Victor’s face is touched, and he places his hand over his heart. “Okay, Yuuri. I’ll gladly eat Katsudon with you if you win…YES! OKAY! I’ll show you the programs then!”

Yuri looks surprised, the pig didn’t want Victor to swear to be his coach, he wanted to simply sit and eat with him. Maybe he was wrong to peg him as someone that could hurt Victor, not that he cared. Though perhaps Victor would still come back to Russia.

 

 

 

They’ve been sent off to evaluate what each topic meant to them. Yuri was scrolling through his phone to see if he can find some page on what the song was written about, and to be honest, it was more about some guy who felt super emotional with an organ. He won’t get far with that.

Yuuri however, is still at the rink, and he’s waiting for Victor to gather up his things, arms crossed, a little frustrated. There’s a lot of things going through his mind, but he needs to speak alone with this potential mentor, try to see what his thoughts are, and why he assigned him this song. As soon as the silver haired muse walked into the locker room, his eyes are drawn to Yuuri with curiosity, there’s an expression on his face he hasn’t seen before. He looks almost red in the eyes instead of his beautiful brown ones, and he sets his bag down with a sense that it needed to be expressed. “Yuuri.” He turns his head to see Victor. “What’s going on?”

“You did this on purpose.” 

“…I do a lot of things on purpose, would you clarify?”

“You gave me the sexual one because of my history.” He stops leaning against the lockers and faces him, though it’s halfway across the room, it’s almost like he wants to be in his face. “You chose Eros for me because of my job I took up, the one that I wanted to keep in my private life, the one that I disclosed to you privately.”

Victor opens his mouth to talk, yet he’s not sure he knows exactly what to say, instead, he listens further and sits down on the seats before the lockers. 

“When I told you about this, I specifically told you it was private, I told you it was something I didn’t want to be found out! What if I’m not ready for people to know I’m not the straightest person in the world?”

“…..I was right.” His eyes widen and he looks up to him, in this rant that didn’t seem to have a stopping point, Yuuri hadn’t even noticed he’d come out to the person he’s been trying to talk to about his feelings for so long.

He kept rambling, until Victor’s words stopped him. “How are you so sure that I gave it to you for this reason, Yuuri?” He asks calmly, definitely not wanting to disrupt this relationship he’s built up in this timeframe.

“BECAUSE!” He squeaks and runs his hand through his hair, bumping the glasses to be a little crooked on his face, “You must think it’s funny! That I wore makeup and heels, I dressed up for this job, and now you press it into another part of my life as if it doesn’t matter that they mixed? What will people think?”

_“He’s not wrong…I had thought since he enjoyed that part of his life, he could mix that love into something else he’s cared about, perhaps that was wrong on my part…” Victor holds his hand out to him, gesturing for his hand._

Yuuri stops rambling, looking down to him. This gesture was supposed to be comforting of some sort? Slowly he sets his hand down in his, Victor’s hand gently tightens on it, and pulls it to his forehead where it gently kissed against his platinum hairline. “…Yuuri, I chose it for many reasons, but I would be lying if I told you that wasn’t one of them. I won’t take my decision back, as to change it would be inherently suspicious to the other party in this trio we’ve created…But I want you to know I don’t expect you to reveal any part of yourself you aren’t comfortable with.”

He’ surprised at every motion, feeling a pink blush go across his cheeks as his hand has been stroked against Victor’s face. “…..How am I supposed to do this then, Victor? I don’t want to lose you.” The words fall from his lips before his mind can catch them, and it makes his heart stop in his chest. Yanking his hand out of the gentle clasp, they slap onto his mouth like he wanted to press the words back into it.

Victor looks up to that sound that sounded so much like a love confession to his ears, and he can feel the familiar flutter within him that he seemed to have forgotten about at some point. Slowly he stands up, looking down to Yuuri with a determined look in his eyes. For a moment, Yuuri doesn’t know what to do, he feels like he’s broken some law, that there will be hurtful words to come from this. Yet instead, he is met with a faceful of Victor’s shirt and neck, he yips gently at the surprise arms that wrap around his shoulders.

The eldest has waited a long time to hear something like that from Yuuri. The fact that it came out because of being called out was unexpected, yet he’d gone forever with feelings he wasn’t sure were mutual. There’s a gentle press of lips to his forehead and he pets his hair gently back. “Yuuri, have faith in me, I’m not your enemy. You can do this routine without your history of the club, and I will personally make sure if you’re triggered, that you will be okay.”

Yuuri usually can’t handle himself when he’s held by anyone for too long, he gets anxious and shaken up, yet he wraps his arms around Victor’s waist, pressing his face against his shirt again. “Thank you, Victor…”


	13. My two Loves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor and Yuuri are exploring their relationship, but by themselves, and though it would make it easier to communicate, they simply don't know how to do it while being comfortable. Victor looks over his smol cat son, and makes sure his boys are safe.

Practice is difficult, having to keep himself separate from the days of heels and makeup three nights per week while bringing out some form of sexuality that wasn’t being tipped. Yuuri’s had a rough time trying to figure it out without dipping back into his habits, and he wants it to remain separate. 

He's told Victor he’ll be imagining himself as a pork cutlet bowl to be sexual, and it’s not far from what he feels, the only erotic thing he’s ever really been able to picture being attractive other than Victor has been this pork cutlet bowl he’s grown up eating. If he could change how his history has been with seducing people outside of stripping, he most certainly….does not know how he would have done that.

Currently, looking over the costume he’s chosen for this journey, there’s part of him that wants to run away, hide. How is he supposed to do that though? This is his house, he can’t run away from his own house and go anywhere without taking a long drive to an airport. Nobody else would take him in without telling him to go through with it.

There’s a full spectrum of emotions that were ablaze in his head, his body, his pins and needles filled fingertips, and his shuddering didn’t help as he stared over the fabric. “I …..I can’t believe this is going to happen tomorrow, how did this week fly by so fast?” 

Yuuri feels as though he’s being stretched out to lengths he’s unable to go, but everyone expects him to do it anyway. So there was an answer, he could talk to his best friend again. Picking up his phone and unplugging it from the charger, he dials up his friend.

 

Phichit is against the bedframe of his hotel room, his back against the soft chest of a certain blonde man, who has his strong arms wrapped around his smaller frame. “G-Gah…Chris~ You’re going to disturb the neighbors…Is this your form of foreplay?” He giggles gently, but those noises are quickly replaced with little moans as Chris leans his head down to bite onto his shoulder. Phichit grips onto the frame, wiggling his hips against him with a playful meaning, until their playful touches turn tense with the interruption of a ringtone.

“….Oof, turn it off, Phichit, we’ve been planning this trip for us!”

The thai skater wiggles away from his lover’s arms, and plops down onto his stomach to grab his phone, “…It’s Yuuri, I’d better take this.” There’s a groan from Chris as he slides the button, then rolls onto his back while on the messy blankets of the bed.

“Hey Phichit!”

“YUURI!” Pops this voice from the speaker, “How’s it going? Are you excited for tomorrow?” 

Chris pouts and looks over Phichit’s body as he talks on the phone so nonchalantly, as if they weren’t about to be doing the nasty in .2 seconds before Yuuri came into the mix. Not that he minds threesomes, but in a more sensual crowd. “I-I’m trying to be! I’m not even sure what I’m going to be doing.”

“…Yes you do, you’ve been practicing it for a whole week in the arms of a Russian god.”

There's a nip from Christophe, pouting enviously at the way his lover is talking about another man. He sticks his tongue out at him. 

A frustrated sigh into the phone says otherwise, and he sits up in his bed. “Phichit, I can’t skate the Eros routine like this…. I can’t do it! I have no idea how to seduce, only to perform!”

“Maybe that’s what you need to do then.”

An impatient Christophe leans down, and he begins leaving lovebites against the inner thighs of his partner, who shudders a bit at the little touches. He covers up any noises with the gentle cough of clearing his throat.

“But Yurio is surpassing me because he actually feels his song! I don’t feel like I’m sexy being the pork cutlet bowl.”

Phichit would have slung himself over Yuuri’s shoulders by now in a hug if he were beside him, and Yuuri knows this. “You know, maybe you should think of seducing Vict-ooooooor.~” One of the nips is particularly close to a sensitive spot of his, and Christophe notices it immediately with an evil smirk on his face.

“Hey!”

Clearing his throat to cover up those moans, he leans back against the pillow. “What? I know you used to fantasize giving him a lap dance when you were trying to get yourself riled up for the club.” 

There was a point to all this, and there’s a lot of fear in even considering that, “I’d prefer not to be a pervert and just pretend that just because there’s a spark between Victor and I….that I can imagine those things about him. It’s not fair to him.”

A quiet air is filling up on the speaker, “what do you mean a spark, Yuuri?” All sexual arousal going on at this moment is gone, even despite the playful hands of the partner smothering his whole lower half in kisses.

“God dammit.”

“YUUUUURRRIIII, SPILL THE BEANS, OH MY GOD. WHAT SPARK?” Throwing himself up to stand, Christophe gets a faceful of knee and tumbles off the side of the bed with a grunt. Phichit looks behind him and mouths a sorry.

There was no stopping the nosy best friend anymore, he lets out a long sigh and runs his hand through his hair. “Okay! Okay! Fine! Calm yourself down, I’ll tell you.” A shuffle in the phone indicates Phichit is preparing himself to hear this, Yuuri imagines he’s safely putting his hamsters in their little sanctuary so they don’t fly off the bed. “Okay….Last week, when I was assigned Eros to be skating, I confronted Victor that he gave me that routine because of my days as a stripper.”

“You make it sound like ages ago, Yuuri, it was like three months ago.”

“Do you want to hear about this or what?” The stillness makes for acknowledgement, “Okay. Good. We were in the locker room and I…..I can’t remember but, I think I said something about not being ready to talk about all this stuff, especially putting it out there in my dancing. And next thing I knew, we were…in each other’s arms.”

There’s some sort of pterodactyl screech on the other end of the phone and some thud, as if the damn thing had been thrown across the room. And violently it has been. That prophecy has been fulfilled. Go Phichit.

“…Phichit?”

 

Clattering around, there’s a thud of footsteps to retrieve said flying phone and he appears back to the speaker. “THEN WHAT HAPPENED?”

Clearing his throat, he responds quietly, “I think he kissed my head…”

“And you’re not going to imagine seducing him, WHY?” The excited voice chitters on the other line, “Yuuri, the sound in your voice is happier than our cheat days, you have to imagine something with Victor. Something that gets you excited! It doesn’t have to be sexual, but think of him somehow! What can you do to make it work for you?”

 

Yuuri wondered if he could at least try to insert that somewhere. “…Phichit, I have to go, I’m going to Minako’s to practice. You’ll watch tomorrow, right?”

“Couldn’t miss it for the world, go get em!”

 

Phichit hangs up the phone and sighs, looking around the hotel room, “Chris?

 

“He’s not here, you killed him with your KNEE.” A shudder flies up his spine as he realizes he’d flipped his shit, and he runs over.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I got really excited! Victor and Yuuri have a spark and there was a forehead kiss and there was a loving embrace and I PANICKED.”

“THERE WAS A KISS?” He jumps up, narrowly missing elbowing Phichit himself. “I GOTTA CALL VICTOR.”

Phichit grabs his phone and hides it behind his back, “Christophe, I feel like giving him advice like this is cheating! Letting him know we’re talking about this stuff with Yuuri? Don’t you want them to fall in love on their own?”

Christophe pouts, “I’m Victor’s wingman! Whenever I’m in the room, someone’s bound to get laid somewhere.”

“Ice papaaaaaa,” Phichit whines and leans over, nuzzling under his chin and hugging him gently to distract him, “That’s not happening right now…” Leaning up to bite him gently on the nape of his neck, he sticks his hips out and wiggles them, making sure that while he’s being loving and cute, there’s a view of his cute rear. “You can’t make a phone call if you’re making me walk funny, can you?”

There’s a sudden determined expression on Chris’ face, and he looks down. “You’re an evil little nudel, aren’t you?”

 

Yuri hears thumping of footsteps downstairs, and after spending a week in this forsaken place, he can tell it’s the Katsudon by how he thumps around. _“Why the fuck is he awake? Does he even sleep?” _Sitting up, he stretches, but he thinks a moment. “….He’s up to get extra time with Victor! The prick!” Grabbing his sweatshirt, he runs out his bedroom door and hurries down the stairs. Sliding into the main lobby area, he looks around, Victor is nowhere to be found, but there’s Yuuri, putting on his coat, not even startled by the young man who’s slid into the room. “……Hey asshole, what are you doing up?”__

Yuuri looks over his shoulder, “I’m going out.” He adjusts a bag on his back, it looks like his skating duffel bag, but it’s hard to tell in the half lit room. 

“….You do realize there’s other things to do than practice? Like sleep? We kind of are competing for a bullshit prize tomorrow.” Though he pokes, he’s a little concerned as to why it’s so important to leave at midnight.

There’s no answer, the second skater in the room steps out without response, and he was on his way to Minako’s with a decision in mind. Yuri rolls his eyes, that son of a bitch runs away a lot, perhaps he should tell Victor, no reason. “He at least needs to know the dick’s leaving so late. If he goes missing, I want witnesses.”

Sliding the door open, not even knocking, he shuffles over and pokes Victor in his stupid old man face. “Victor.” Poke “Victor.” Poke. “Victor.” After a moment, the Russian champion sits up with a startled grunt, out of focus as if he’s still dreaming.

“Hmng, no, go away, seagulls…” He mumbles and rubs his face into his palms.

“Oy. Asshole. Your fanboy ran off somewhere.” He slaps his face gently to help wake him up.

Finally, he is shaken into reality, hearing the news of Yuuri heading out, “What? Where did he go?” Rubbing his eyes, he stretches. 

“I don’t fuckin know, I told someone, your responsibility now. Go do what you do, I’m tired.” Finally turns on his heels and starts back out the door and into his own corridor of the onsen. 

Quickly, Victor puts on some clothes, wrapping his scarf around his neck, adjusting his jacket, and rushing to the front door and out. If he’s lucky, he’ll be able to figure out what direction he went, or see him down the road. He’s not that fortunate, and looking down either side of the road, it’s quiet.

_“Okay…if I were Yuuri, and the entire town was closed….where would I go?” _He paces before the spring for a little bit, trying to remember where everything is in this town. He decides to start one direction and try to keep track of all the signs, maybe his very slight knowledge of Japanese language will help him. Off he goes into the busy part of town, towards the shops, the Ice Castle, everything else.__

___“He runs away when he’s scared…it’s his way of coping, just like that night at the rink and…” _He stops in his steps, looking up to the sky, aglow with stars. _“At the airport.” _The realization had hit him before, but something about the stillness of the ghost town was a powerful magnifier to it. It made him think about the banquet, and the regrets he had towards it. _“What if we had kissed? What if we kept dancing? What if…I stayed when he woke?” _Perhaps he would be more willing to loving embraces. As much as Victor adored their relationship now, it was lonely on this one-sided crush. “Bah…crush sounds like a child’s word. I adore him, who am I kidding? But he’s….hesitant. He didn’t mind when I kissed his head, I’m….I think I should let him come to me.”______ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _

He feels his face brightened by the light of a window, Minako’s studio lights shone down on the sidewalk he was standing on, and he knew she never kept it open this late. Victor starts up to the side of the window to peek in, and Yuuri was in sight, a sense of relief lightens the load on his shoulders. Minako is showing some odd movements it seems, they resemble the routine moves that he would be doing tomorrow on the ice, but the steps look more dramatic.

There’s a brighter fire in how he performed, he looks softer, but harsher in his expressions, his lips pursed at the right times and his fingers slink down his body from the chest down. 

Victor almost presses his face to the glass, wanting to be closer, and a remembered sensation within him rises. How he longed to be those hands, to touch what those fingers are stroking. He gets a fleeting sense that he’s cheating, seeing this before the competition begins, despite the fact he arranged everything. He swiftly pulls away from the window, back to the dark and looking to the sky once more with hope in his chest. “he’s doing it, he’s discovering his Eros for all he’s got…”

There’s hesitation to leave, but he knows Yuuri is safe, and he’ll probably sleep over at Minako’s if he gets the chance. The quiet street aglow by the studio’s windows, are filled with the gentle moan of the wind and the hump of the footsteps as he heads back towards the springs.

He’s proud, and though he himself is quite tired, he already senses he won’t be able to rest. Victor once saw himself discovering parts about his skating not even he knew were possible; the bleeding feet from new skates, the cushions one wore first time on the ice, the first chilly nerve filled air of a competition. When he became who he was, it wasn’t sudden, he worked so hard at it, and he became who he was with the love of life around him. 

Yet here he was, away from the rest of the world, and all he can think about is how he feels in this moment, aching to be going to bed with someone beside him. To feel that happiness of telling his loved one about his day, who he’s proud of, what he’s thankful for, and wrap his arms around someone that isn’t his dog.

Stepping inside, the first thing he notices is Yuri asleep on one of the cushions next to the table. Victor can’t help but smile, knowing he must have tried to stay awake for the two to come home, and he was too sleepy, couldn’t even last the half hour. He leans down and takes hold of his wrists, pulling on his arms gently to tug him awake, “Yurio, come on, you’ve got to get some rest for tomorrow.” 

A gentle whine escapes from the brat, and he hoists himself up with the champion’s help, mumbling a little as he shuffles to face his hallway. “Where’s the pig?” Victor puts his hands on his shoulders and starts helping him to his room. 

“He’s at Minako’s, felt a little restless, so he’ll be sleeping there perhaps.” Slowly they go up the stairs, making sure the teen’s coordinated on his way to the storage room changed into a bedroom. He pulls up the covers with one hand, and guides the teen to lay down, as soon as the comforter covers him, Yuri clings to it and rolls over sleepily. Victor just makes sure the rest of him is tucked in with a gentle laugh. “You’ve got a big day tomorrow, get some sleep, son.”

Yuri was too sleepy to even argue, nor to notice.

There was another hint of love he felt tonight, the one for his protégé, Yuri. Much of him realized there was a conflict of interests for this entire competition, and removing himself from it would be the only way to really end it all. But tomorrow would choose who would get him all to themselves. What a prize he must be!

 

Laying back on his own mattress, he’s met with fuzzy cuddles of a puppy against his toes, and a chest that won’t stop fluttering.


	14. The competition!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The actual performances begin, Some visitors arrive, and Yuuri has some major regrets!

It was packed in the arena, the old building hadn’t seen this many people before, and the seats were filled all the way to the ends, children had to sit in their parent’s laps. Eyes were aglow at the media, the flags and banners, the faces plastered on posters all over of idols they had been watching after for eons. Yuri Plisetsky and their very own Katsuki Yuuri, both of them competing with the idol Victor Nikiforov in what was the most exciting thing to happen this town since Yuuri had first gone to compete in the big games.

Yuri is stretching his arms to the side of the ice, and he can see his Japanese competitor doing the same at the wall behind him. Victor nudges him to get his attention with a big smile, “Yurio! Are you excited?” Only to be met with a glare and a scowl.

“You’re coming home with me to Russia, Victor, you don’t get to weasel out of that promise.”

 

He looks blank. “…Right, promises. That’s what this whole competition is about.” The two peer over at him and then at each other.

“Oh whatever!” The blond brat jumps onto the ice, the applause already ringing out of the audience at the young man standing taller than any tree in japan could hope. There’s even a sway in how he skates towards the middle of the rink, waving around to the fans who had made the trip all the way to this tiny town and booked up the spring and all the hotels surrounding.

The art of figure skating was harsh to the body, it involved breaking down to be stronger, and any good skater would never show in his or her skating that they were in pain. They needed to seem effortless, like they were born with the ability to spread eagle, yet their performances needed to make it seem like only they could achieve its perfection.

Yuri moved to the music as though he not only was the artist performing, but the muse. “ _Grandpa_ ,” he frowns, _“I was so selfish to come out here…_ ” With a turn of his skates, he twirls quickly, then prances across the ice with the beauty of a ballerina, “ _I didn’t need to, and my own inspiration can’t be here to watch me.._ ”

The Japanese skater watches at the performer’s peak, more than impressed with the young man who was just now making his debut into the seniors division, ” _He’s definitely feeling agape….I only hope I can match with Eros…_ ”

Victor looks over for just an instant, noticing the determination on his face was thrilling for him. He hid his smile with a gloved hand, barely able to contain the enticing dance that was about to happen on the ice after his friend/son.

The music is all too fast for him, like he needs more time to think about what he stayed up all night for. The feeling of exhaustion didn’t help. As the music ends, he pants and holds his hands up to the lights, yet the voice still rung in his head as if he were inside a bell that echoed endlessly. He was distraught with his decisions of coming here, there’s regret in his eyes, and he takes a deep breath to pull himself out of the pose. With a smile, Yuri’s hands fly up to wave at everyone around him, the Yuri’s Angels group squealed from the corner and he still gave them their love.

On his way back to the entrance where Victor stood, excited with his arms out to embrace him, he doesn’t really fight it, instead, Victor lifts him up and squeezes. “YURI! YOU DID SO WELL! That was the best skate I’ve ever seen you do!”

“You haven’t seen my best.” He growls and pulls away to put on his blade covers, eyes still filled with green pools of darkness.

“That’s what I like to hear!” He laughs and looks up to Yuuri, noticing he looks quite nervous, and very tired.

It’s hard not to when you stay up all night and skip breakfast to practice for a very stressful experience, Yuuri was not as nervous as he usually is, which surprises his possible coach. He approaches the black suited man, looking down to meet his gaze, “Aren’t you excited, Yuuri?” The Japanese skater nearly shudders when his name is said, but he instead takes a deep breath and bows his head ever so slightly, yet his nerves are exposed. “You want me to eat pork cutlet bowls with you?”

Yuuri looks up, trying to think of something to say, instead he wraps his arms around him in a hug, initiating that kind of embrace is not usually something he’s fully comfortable with. The Russian knows this, and he’s a little surprised at first, but gladly welcomes it with a tight squeeze and a chuckle. “Victor.” He glances beside him to look at Yuuri face-to-face, “I’m going to be the spiciest pork cutlet bowl, I hope you’re hungry.”

_“…Did….Did I just say that?”_ He had meant to make some sort of joke, or say something like a thank you, yet instead, his mouth went ahead and said the dirtiest thing it could come up with it. _“Maybe…Maybe he didn’t hear it!”_ Slowly, with determination, he lets go and heads over to the ice _._

Victor is burning to a crisp from the neck up, he’d definitely heard it, and he’s not even sure if he was serious about saying it or not. But he tries to keep his expression calm to be sure not to make Yuuri nervous as he heads out onto the surface with that in mind.

 

Meanwhile, Phichit and Christophe were scooting on into the area where Yuri and Victor were, passing the young protégé and heading over to the eldest in the bunch, sporting their team jackets. Just in time to see Victor blushing like a maniac and trying to seem as serene as he can be to avoid bringing too much attention to his feeling. “Oh boy, did you see that?” Mumbles Phichit, while his partner walks over.

“What was that all about?” Wrapping his arm around his broad shoulders, Victor gasps at the blonde who has appeared. “Oh, hey, by the way, Surprise!”

“Christophe?” Looks to his side, “Phichit?” For a moment, he hesitates. “I feel like you’re those little angel and devil figures that appear during times of difficulty.”

“Close enough!” Pipes in the shortest of the trio. “….You look a little panicked, we didn’t scare you, did we?”

He smiles a little, covering his mouth with his gloved hand, leaning over and mumbling, “Just a little surprised at something Yuuri said.”

Christophe chuckles, “Now, you being surprised? What did he say? Did he propose?”

“I think he told me to eat him.”

They all have the same expression just as Victor did a moment ago, but the silver haired fox giggles under his glove, looking up.

Christophe looks quite impressed, “How did you go from not talking, to a hug, and him wanting you to devour his asshole in a span of-“

“Shush.” He hushes him, “He’s about to start~” He must have misspoken…right?

The room was immediately drawn to how Yuuri looked on the ice, the heat he created was dangerous to say the least. His step sequence was more feminine, the way he stroked his body on the ice was filled with temptation. The cameras, the crowd, the air, all belonged to him; most of all, Victor. Their eyes meet for just a moment and the expression on his face just screamed, “ _ _he’s mine”_ _

Yuri watches with fury, the way this man moves is so much fuel to taunt him with, yet Victor is enthralled like a child to their idol. “This idol is seducing our coach, what the fuck? Is this bullshit legal here?” Even the way he’s tripping on the ice, it looks just fine, and the coach is blushing all along the way. Slowly the thought fills him, that dreaded feeling pooled in his gut. _ _ _“…I’m…. I’m a fool, I should have known. Victor was planning on choosing him anyway…”__ _

Grabbing his bag, he storms off to the back room, off to get out of this damn costume. “ _ _ _ _ _I could have been home with grandpa, I could have improved my focus on the GPF, but I came anyway, and I was a fool.”__ _ _ _

As the fierce violin came to an end, Yuuri takes his final pose and the arena erupts with applause, he’s almost afraid to look up to see if they look as happy as he feels to be done with it. When he does lift his head, his excited mother, proud father, and loving sister are in sight clapping for him, his friends holding a banner with his name on it. In that instance, he feels warm, he’s happy, his heart is fluttering, cheeks are red, and more than that, he can see Victor with a face he wants to run to. With burning affection, he races over, ready to meet him with another hug, as though he were starved from it for a whole year.

Victor looks quite happy to see him, and with open arms, he states it. “That was one spicy pork cutlet bowl!” He jumps over, intending to hug him just like he did before. “But what was with that jump? We’ve got to really work on your landing, Yuuri, and another thing!” Off coach victor goes, rambling about how he could improve. And Yuuri drops.

_______“Well, at least he didn’t take what I had said the wrong way.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _

Then he looks around. “Hey, where’s Yurio?” Victor stops and looks to the benches where he was once before, then behind him, just in time to see Yuko walk into the area.

“He uh….He left! He said he’s going home!”

That means… “I….I won?” He didn’t believe it, even as he was saying it, he searches the room for anyone shaking their head for good measure. “Are you sure he’s not in the bathroom or something?”

Victor grabs his new student’s hand and holds it up, “ATTENTION!” He calls, the room grows quiet as he steals away their eyes and ears, “Ice Castle Hasetsu! I have chosen my champion! Katsuki Yuuri!” In the thrill of the announcement, the crowds cheer louder than Yuuri could have ever heard before when his name was called, it almost brought him to tears. He holds his other hand up, squeezing the one in Victors, cheering in his victory.

There’s a pair of arms that throws around his shoulders, a familiar giggle in his ear, “YOU WON!”

He doesn’t even need to turn around, “Phichit! What are you doing here?”

“Surprise! I told you I couldn’t miss this for the world!”

“But you…” He just notices the man a little taller than Victor, “And Christophe Giacometti!”

Chris chuckles playfully, “So formal, Yuuri, just call me Chris like everyone else.”

Phichit steps over to the three, standing close to Chris, “Well, mostly everyone else! I’ve got a few names for you.”

There’s a shared glance between Yuuri and Victor, a little confused.

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

The Nishigori family disperses the crowds to an open skate on the rink, and after hours of media coverage, fan pictures, autographs, and a lot of praising from all of the skaters, the party of family and friends step out. In their arms were piles of stuffed animals, and strings of flowers and banners, all of which had been thrown to the ice in adoration from the fans he really didn’t expect. Yuuri is tired and hungry, and he is surprised he’s still on his own two feet after all of that excitement, he’s a bit weak from it actually.

Hiroko pinches her son’s cheek, causing his headache to shake around in his skull, he groans as she squeaks too him, “My sweet boy, you’re going to get a big bowl of Katsudon tonight for dinner! I have to run to the store to get fresh ingredients, we’re out of mirin!” Gathering her purse, she gets the car keys for the family van.

As the family steps away to pack up, they wave, heading off to the market and to haul the fan stuff home. Yuuri partly wanted to go with them, but he knew Victor was planning on taking the winner out for drinks when they would win. “Come then, I’m going to take you out! We’ll walk the beach, we’ll run a bit through the cherry petals!” Maybe he wanted the marketplace a little more right now.

Phichit smiles, “Hey! Uh, would it be okay if we joined you? Christophe and I were planning on visiting that noodle place you bragged about, but it could be fun!”

Christophe chuckles, crossing his arms, “Do you two mind if we make it a double date?” There’s reason in his mind, he was going to try to be that ultimate wingman again. Phichit just whips over to his side, leaning in on his personal bubble.

It was then that Yuuri’s eyes widen, he smirks, “I didn’t know you two were together! You didn’t tell me on any of the phonecalls, Phichit!” Victor laughs and bows his head in congratulations as they were starting to walk in no specific direction.

“Weeeellll…..Honestly, we were kind of keeping it on the downlow, and I just really forgot to mention anything. We met at the banquet, got some lunch the next day, one thing led to another….”

“And I destroyed his ass.”

“Chris!” He pouts to the boyfriend, “They don’t need details! You were so polite at my parents and now this!”

“What can I say? Victor is my best friend, he brings out my dirty side.” Victor is certain that’s the only side he really has.

Tilting his head, the Japanese man looks surprised, “You…You came out to your family? Phich! That’s huge! How did they take it?”

His warm smile just makes the rest of him glow, “Well, they love him!” Phichit hid well the crack in his voice with how excited he was about it, yet Yuuri knew he would burst out into tears of happiness. “My dad didn’t understand at first, and my mother was asking Chris a million questions in Thai, but once I told them how happy we are together….” He rambles on a bit, Chris squeezes his hand gently, “….Well, here we are!”

Yuuri was so…happy for Phichit, but in a conflicted manner. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __“Wow…when we first became roomies in Detroit, he always talked about how his family was so against that sort of stuff…It was something we bonded over.”_________ He could even name a time in which a relationship had ended for his friend, who couldn’t bring anyone home to his family. How far he had come from that time _. “I’m thrilled for you!”_ He smiles, though he’s pretty sure he can feel his heart beating in his throat. “I’m glad your family looked past their prior beliefs and took care of you guys.”

Victor was a little surprised himself, nodding Christophe over a few feet ahead of them. “Chris,” He mumbles as the group is walking two by two down to the beachside. “Meeting parents? That’s a first, a big step for you….How are your parents dealing with it?”

Christophe glances over his shoulder at the two black haired men behind them, who laugh and talk together, “We’ll be visiting them after this.” He has a gaze in his eyes and he turns back to Victor, “You’ll think I’m entirely too cheesy, but he’s not my one-night-stand kind of partner; Phichit is different.”

Victor laughs, but he pets his friend’s shoulder gently with support. “You were right, but I’m glad.” They line the water, just beyond where the foam touches. “Are you going to go public?”

Phichit and Christophe go a little quiet, almost simultaneously. “Well…” Begins the Thai skater, “Considering how support for us might vary and safety is an issue for some countries we’ll be competing in…”

“We are going to stay low. Unless somehow we end up only competing in gay-friendly countries, it’s not safe to assume we won’t face challenges from biased judges, fans, or political figures.”

That was saddening to hear, there was a world that a lot of people didn’t know of, where hiding how much you care about someone is necessary to continue a life of passion and career. You fear being in love in public.

Yuuri feels an overwhelming mist of lightheadedness, the third or fourth wave that’s hit him since he finished his routine, the lack of food and overextended exercise he’d done was hitting him. “ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _I really need something, I feel like I’m about to pass out….but…this is such a touching moment, I can’t ruin it.”__ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

The eldest of them smiles a bit, “Well, you’re safe with us, Yuuri and I will do everything we can to keep you two a secret, just don’t use it against us when we win gold.” He winks playfully, Phichit smiles bright, grateful.

Yuuri nods in agreement, his headache thumping around in his brain again, but he shows confidence in his old roomie. “Thank you both! Phichit and I couldn’t ask for better friends.”

“We really couldn’t, come on! You’ve got to show us around this town, I’ve heard about it a million times and this is my first time here!” He hops in place, kicking up a bit of sand in the process.

“Well, Yuuri?” Victor smiles and wraps his arm around him, shaking him a bit like he was going to motivate the crap out of him, “Ready to show our friends a good time?”

_____________“Lord almighty, make it stop.”_____________ He clears his throat and smiles bright, “Okay! Okay! Yes, I’ll show you guys around! How about we get some noodles or something?”

“Really, Yuuri? Don’t you want to save your appetite for the super-sized pork cutlet bowl? Please?” Victor pleads gently, he’s almost as excited for him to eat it as he is.

Yuuri gulps and nods gently, “Right! Right! That’ll be fine!” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __“I’m going to die.”_______________ “This is fine! Let me show you guys the uh…uh…the…”

Phichit blinks and looks around, “There’s some pretty great cherry blossom trees up the hill over there, why don’t we hike on up?”

The rest of the party nods in agreement and starts their trek, Yuuri grimaces a little, more exercise is not what he needed right now, but who was he to keep them from enjoying their first visit to Hasetsu? After all, it might help the town actually get more business, which is definitely what it needed.

They take a brisk walk up the hill to the view of the town, Yuuri takes them down to the marketplace, where all the tourism seems to be most famous, they take tons of pictures, or rather Phichit does. There are some Hasetsu shirts Victor buys for them, Christophe gets his boyfriend a hamster plushie, and in return gets a red heart pillow.

In the first warm day of the year it feels like, Yuuri’s dragging as he walks down the main road on the sidewalk towards the beach again, yet he hears the sound of the Selfie Stick getting set up, and he turns around to get ready for another picture. “Yuuri! I want one more picture out here, I wanna get the beach in the background!” Calls his best friend, he is pulled over. Victor wraps his arms around them, Chris poses and blows a kiss into the camera. “Everyone say Grand Prix!”

As soon as the camera flashes, the shutter noise rings, there’s a thud as the exhausted skater hits the ground back first.


	15. Pure Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor is falling hard, and he can't figure out how to express it, he is walking on eggshells, and Yuuri is worried about his family figuring out about the situation of how he feels

The collision into the ground didn’t make that feeling in his head feel too great, but he couldn’t help it. His ears were thudding in a rhythm, his eyesight seemed like a broken camera that couldn’t focus and faded mostly everything out. Though he can hear some things around him, he’s slipping very quickly into a much needed rest, his body couldn’t handle being awake without food anymore, especially after hiking and skating like he did today.

“Gah! Yuuri!” Phichit tosses his selfie stick into Christophe’s arms and leans down to where his friend was sprawled out on the sidewalk, Victor looks absolutely shocked.

“…Does…Does he do that often?” He’s concerned, kneeling beside him, looking at his prodigy, once Yuuri’s eyes are closed completely, he gasps, “What do we do? Ah! Why did he pass out?”

“I don’t know! I don’t know!” Phichit looks around at them, in a little bit of a panic.

Christophe is the only one of them who doesn’t freak out, in fact, he pulls out his water bottle and unscrews it, dumping it on Yuuri’s flushed face. In shock from the water splashed on his face, he shakes his head, dripping wet as he looks up to the sky, and then down. “Gah! Who the…what…?” He blinks and looks at them. The faces he’s met with are filled with relief, and if his eyes weren’t ready to fall out of his skull, he’d be happier to see them. “Ugh….”

Victor puts his hands on his face, “Yuuri! What was that? What happened? Are you alright?” He nearly demanded to know, Phichit stands over him.

“Don’t sit up for a second, Yuuri, lay there a moment, catch your breath!”

He takes a deep breath and looks around, “ugh…..I……I’m sorry guys, I…I fell, didn’t I?” He mumbles, not registering much of what was happening anymore.

Christophe kneels down and takes his wrist to check his pulse, seeming to be the only calm one in the situation. “Yes, you dropped like a sack of potatoes. Yuuri, are you taking any medication right now?”

“N-No…” He closes his eyes for just a second, putting one of his hands over his eyes to block out the bright light. Also to hide his very embarrassed blush.

Victor looks to Christophe, confused. “…Did you go to medical school?”

“No, but I’ve seen the medicals work at the rink for those who have fainted.  Believe it or not, very fun.” He feels his forehead, “Yuuri, when was the last time you ate or drank?”

There’s a gentle grunt from him as he pulls his hand away, “Uh……Y…Yesterday at lunch…”

“Well, there you have it.”

Victor gasps, “Yuuri! You haven’t eaten anything and you haven’t even said anything?!” He suddenly sees his friend grimacing at the sound of his voice raising, frustrated at the way his head was pounding.

Phichit looks relieved, the most out of them all, “Is that all? Come on, I’ll treat you to some lunch, get that blood sugar back to normal, okay? You’re not used to going that long without food or sleep!” He pulls him to sit up very slowly, “Stay here, I’ll get you something from the car.”

Victor pouts, “What do you mean, ‘is that all?’, he fainted!” Without caring if he’s protesting, the coach lifts his pupil, bridal style, leaning his cheek against the top of Yuuri’s head.

He may have been pale before, but that sure helped bring some color to his face, a nice rouge to be exact. “Uh….Victor…I-I can walk! I just got really dizzy is all!”

“I’m taking you to get a big bowl of katsudon, even if I have to tbe the one to cook it for you.”

“Hey!” Phichit grabs his phone and then Christophe’s hand, following after, “We’re coming too!”

 

They watched Victor carry him all the way back home, quite impressive for being halfway across town, as Yuuri was trying to get down, to no avail. They get back in time to see Hiroko carrying in some spices for the mini party tonight, she almost drops them all seeing her son in the arms of their current guest. “Yuuri! What happened?”

“He passed out, his blood sugar is low.” Victor answers and brings him inside, setting him down to the cushions at the tables, “You. Stay there.” He prances off to the kitchen, followed by the quiet shuffle of Hiroko.

It’s quiet for a moment as Yuuri looks around his home, a little awkward all this had happened. This sort of attention was not usually what he wanted to attract. Phichit can’t help but erupt in the giggles. “…what? What’s so funny?”

Chris leans his elbow against the table and smiles as the young man continues to giggle away, it’s only for a small breath he is able to answer back after his giggle fit, “Badum dadum!” He starts humming the wedding march, causing Yuuri to be red in the face once more.

“Oh, Yuuri, are you excited for those wedding bells?” Chris snickers away, admiring the surroundings as he keeps an eye on the woozy friend.

“Oooh, guys, he wasn’t doing it like that!” He shushes them, shaking his head, but then groaning from his headache. They each lighten their tones after seeing him wince, and Chris passes over another water bottle, nudging him gently on the arm to take it. There’s no hesitation.

“You know,” Christophe hums, “You underestimate how much this man loves to love, Yuuri. When you have his affections, he will do everything he can for you.”

Phichit smiles and nods, “When we talked with him at the banquet, he was-“

They’re interrupted by a loud back, Makkachin prances over to Yuuri who doesn’t look happy at the extra noise, “Ooooohhh…” Yuuri wobbles a bit in his seat as he buries his head in his hands. “He’s got more people to care for than me you guys…” He mumbles and crosses his arms on the table, closing his eyes. This was the most comfortable he’d been all day, just face first into some darkness, though he wishes there was a blanket as well, and a pillow, maybe some….delicious bowl of eros.

There’s some muffled noises for a bit as he dozes off for what feels like a second, but then he lifts his head up, “Gah….sorry…ahem….” He rubs his eyes, noticing the room is…well, suddenly a little darker shade of sunlight than it was earlier.

Chris and Phichit are cuddling on the other side of the table while they’re by themselves, they look up surprised. “…Good morning, Yuuri.” Phichit chuckles, “Did you doze off there?”

“Hmng…No, I didn’t. I was…just thinking of what we were talking about….Did I win today? That’s right, I did…I won by default.” He mumbles again, sitting up and rubbing his eyes beneath his crooked and smudged glasses.

The calm voice of Victor is whispered right over his shoulder, a bowl of hot Katsudon gently being set before him, “You won because I chose you, Yuuri, you must believe that by now, da?”

Yuuri gasps and looks to his side, surprised that Victor had left that kitchen so soon after disappearing, “Gah!......” His nose is captured, after he was going to apologize or something close to that, he’s enthralled by the smell of that familiar pork cutlet bowl with a scent that hovers around him. “…Oh my god, this smells so good…”

The family brings out some trays, passing them out to the guests and sitting themselves down as well, Mari pats her brother’s shoulder. “Good job, Yuuri, your coach makes some good Katsudon.”

“What?” He looks to his mother who nods gently.

“I instructed Victor how to make it, he was very determined to learn.”

The coach enjoys the praise, and he passes the bowls around until he is without any himself. He sits down beside Yuuri and smiles, scooting the bowl closer to him and setting the chopsticks down. “Come on, Yuuri, get your strength back, eat.”

He can’t get himself to take a bite, let alone even touch the perfection in a bowl. “Victor….” He gently picks it up, only to hold it up to him. “This wasn’t the deal.”

“I….” The whole room is shocked, “Yuuri, I don’t understand. You need to eat, get some energy in you.”

He hands his chopsticks to his coach, as well as the beloved bowl, the one he had been awaiting for months to be able to taste again. “I said I wanted to eat pork cutlet bowls with you, you need to have some too.”

It’s quiet, and Victor starts laughing gently, “I suppose…” He pulls out some more chopsticks, “We’ll just have to share.” They share a glance to each other, warm, comforting, a feeling that was like home. “Now take a bite before you faint again.

Phichit smiles and looks up to Christophe, reaching under the table and taking his boyfriend’s hand with a soft squeeze. Chris leans over and whispers, “Looks like we didn’t have to meddle too much after all.”

There’s a day filled with laughter and talking of memories, Victor and Chris share old stories of their shenanigans they used to get into as teens, Phichit talks about his favorite music al and how he wants to incorporate the music into this season, Mari talks about baby Yuuri and how cute he was.

Nobody has seemed to notice Yuuri has nodded off again, leaning into his hand, yet Victor has seen it. He pulls him into his arms, cradling him close and allowing his head to rest on his chest, with a free hand, he pulls the blue glasses off and folds them, setting them down on a napkin. He knew the boy was tired, and he’ll need all the energy he can muster for this season.

Mari stands up, looking to her parents. “Mom, Dad, I think it’s time we wrap up for the evening, we’ll do the dishes so Yuuri doesn’t have to.” They nod and stand up, starting to gather up the bowls, setting on trays, and taking them into the kitchen.

Christophe stands up and stretches, “We’ve got to leave, Phichit and I have to be on a flight at six tomorrow and we’re already pushing our sleep right now. Switzerland is next on the roster.”

Phichit frowns a bit, “I really wanted to say goodbye to Yuuri, but I don’t think he can handle being woken up a third time,” He says worriedly, “Victor, will you at least make sure he’s comfortable in bed? He gets cold easy when he sleeps, so make sure he’s warm!”

“Of course, Phichit, I’ll be sure.”

They each pat Victor on the shoulder as not to disturb the sleeper, and they head out, holding hands as they do when it’s dark out.

Victor looks down to his friend, smiling gently as he sleeps against his chest. It was concerning how Yuuri was so close to needing an actual doctor (maybe) and didn’t say a word to make sure everyone around him was happy first. His head leans down to kiss his forehead, petting his hair with his free hand, there’s a muffled him as he rocks him in his arms, wanting to make him comfortable and happy. “Oh, my poor, Yuuri…” Looking up, his blue eyes were met with another pair of Katsuki eyes, Mari stares, wide eyed at the pair as they’re cuddled up.

She looks quite shocked, and by the expression on her face, she’s already put some pieces together of what exactly Victor was doing. “…..Victor.”

“Mari, I-….”

“Is this why you came?” She asks, staring him down with stern connections of words to say in her head, “Did you come here to be is coach or to be hi-“

“Nonono…” he whispers, making sure Yuuri is still asleep. “I came to be his coach, Mari….He asked me to at the last banquet, and I kept my promise. The feelings just….they started growing and I haven’t been able to stop them….” He almost looks quite protective, holding onto him as though this is the end and he had to savor every last moment against him.

Mari looks at the doorway to be sure her parents aren’t in there, “….does anyone else know?”

He sighs gently, “Phichit and Chris, and….Yuuri if he’s been listening…” He looks down.

The big sister instinct to protect him starts coming down a little bit, Yuuri can handle himself, but that doesn’t mean she won’t be worried. “….I’ll….I’ll let him come to me.” She sighs and looks up to him. “But if I get any red flags from you, your forehead will be my new ashtray.”

There’s a breath of relief and he looks at the doorway. “I’m going to make sure he gets into his bed and I’ll come help you all clean up, okay? He’s going to get a stiff neck from laying like this.” She nods to him and turns to go into the kitchen.

Relaxing a bit, Victor hopes he hasn’t absolutely opened a door that shouldn’t have been opened, he couldn’t bear to witness his chances with Yuuri to be happy to wither away.

 

There is a soft sunshine that glows in the cracks of Yuuri’s window, a big curly poodle is laying on one of his arms and his phone is plugged in above his head at the nightstand. The spring is bustling with guests who came for the event of Hot springs on ice. His brown eyes gently peek open, the headache was gone, a little hungry from his hibernation, but infinitely better than the day before. There’s a twinge of guilt that Phichit and Chris, guests in his home, ended up watching him sleep instead of catching up. He grabs his phone, clicking it to check the time, only to see-OH FUCK HE’S LATE.

Victor is at the rink, he figured Yuuri would sleep in, in fact, he was deep in thought about if having Makkachin sleep in his bed would have been a good decision to keep him warm with the thick comforter. On the side of the rink, he’s spent part of the evening making piroshki’s, sitting in a paper bag in case sleeping beauty forgot to eat breakfast on his way here. “He’s probably freaking out, how adorable.”

The door kicks open, he’s rushing in, apologizing profusely, so fast the words don’t register as a complete sentence. Victor laughs and claps his hands, “Yuuri, I’m quite impressed with how late you are!” the student throws himself before him, still repeating the sorrys.

 _“I must look so weak! So helpless! Aaauuugh!!!!”_ He is thoroughly embarrassed, he doesn’t expect the paper bag just shoved before his face.

“You should have some breakfast before we begin, Da?” He gulps, the lump in his throat he just tried to swallow was plenty filling.

 _“And he made me food? He must think I can’t take care of myself, oh god…”_ Slowly he takes the bag, mumbling his gratitude and slinking to the edge of the ice, to the seats nearby to munch.

Victor has noticed how shy he is, and he frowns, watching him eat quietly from afar. Perhaps he’s still not feeling well from yesterday, maybe he had needed more time to heal up after passing out on the sidewalk. Clearing his throat, he skates around in circles for a bit, letting him take his time eating some protein filled pastries. “We didn’t take him to a doctor or anything…perhaps I should do so today, make sure he’s definitely alright. He’s about as nervous as he was when I first got here, I thought we were making progress.”

 

Practice goes with many distractions, even with Victor nudging him, trying to get his confidence back up to the Eros mode he had before, he’s fidgeting, he’s not making eye contact. As much as he wants to bring it up, he knows deep down that Yuuri won’t want to talk about it, he lets it fester, and build up until it explodes in some form. He’s noticed this just in the little booms, he’s not quite there yet for the full on, and he has no idea what’ll be coming for him.

It’s been three days since they first began actual coaching, Yuuri’s eyebrows are furrowed and his movements are stiff, he’s resorted to preparing to fall rather than preparing to land for his jumps. Victor’s taking notes in a small booklet to keep track, though it’s all steel trapped into his head. He puts on the biggest smile he can when Yuuri drops onto the ice with a loud thud. “I’ve started to notice you tend to flub your jumps when there’s something on your mind! Care to share?” He puts on the kindest voice he can muster for that, and he’s met with a shaking head and getting back up to try the jump again. “…Yuuri, how am I supposed to coach you when you’re not speaking with me?”

“I’m just….tired, Victor.” He states quietly, though every time he looks over his shoulder, he feels intimidated by the mere presence of his coach.

 

Victor tilts his head gently, “….Ah, yes, tired…I’m sure, you’ve been working very hard with no breaks recently.” He tells him, “Though it must feel good to have me as a coach, since you won me! Over a gold medalist really!” _“Oh my sweet Yuuri, perhaps this will raise that confidence a little!”_

He skates over and adjusts his blade, “I won by default…”

”Ah, perhaps not…” He clears his throat, “Perhaps I can explain better how you won another time, Yuuri. Have you thought of what you want to do for your other routine? Your free program?”

Yuuri looks up, a little confused, “Hm? ….I’ve never choreographed my own program, Coach Celestino has always chosen my music and my routine.” At least they’re on another subject, so that’s good. He’d never really been absolutely in love with a certain way to move on the ice, he’s always just glad to be on it, whether he’s beautiful, whether he’s mediocre, even during Eros, he was just glad to be there.

“Perhaps you should give it some thought, give me an idea of what you love and we’ll put it together, and I do mean we, Yuuri.” He looks at the time, “Looks as though we should head back to the springs, you seem stiff, so you should take a dip with me, yes?” As Yuuri was about to refuse, he gives a look, he’s been worried lately, and has been deep in thought just on the basics, how was he going to make this man a champion if he never believed he could do it?

Yuuri saw the expression and he nods gently, “Okay, I’ll come take a dip.”

 

Through the next couple days, after hoping it would lift somehow, Victor found himself struggling to spend more than a few minutes with Yuuri that wasn’t with actual coaching. His friendship was getting thinned out over a period of time, and he couldn’t figure out why.

Yuuri is chin deep in the spring’s hot pools, his glasses set aside, and his attention along with them. He couldn’t bring himself to say much, though that wasn’t too different from his usual self, he heard his own thoughts more than his voice most days. Victor peeks out the glass door at him, wrapped in his green robe and beside Mari who’s refilling towels on a shelf. “Mari….Is he alright?”

She glances over, then out the door where Yuuri was stewing under a dark cloud of his own despair, he looked tired. “…I don’t know, but he does look upset.”

“Why? Did something happen? Everything seemed fine just this past week…”

“I wish I knew what his emotional turmoil was about all the time, but people with anxiety and depression can be set off by anything.” Mari takes a draw from her cigarette, then turns to the next shelf with her laundry basket.

Victor frowns, _“And…he told Chris he doesn’t take any medications when he passed out…”_ Perhaps he could help his dear friend a bit, maybe the confidence the poor piggy lacked had something to do with it. Yet he knew Yuuri hated being fussed over, he had to be delicate. “…Thank you, Mari. I think I can figure out a way to help somehow.” Walking out, Victor tosses aside his robe to the side of the spring, and starts doing stretches, “Yuuri!” He grunts ,doing some toe touches, “I want to talk to you about lowering the difficulty on some jumps in your program.”

“Wait, what?” He looks over his shoulder, only to get an eyeful of some Russian junk, he whips his head forward again with a blush. “I-I need the points! We can’t just make it lower and expect gold!”

“Who says? If we just adjust it to your abilities, like performance, where you always have higher marks, you won’t need the jumps you aren’t able to land.” As the words come out, he senses perhaps that’s not the best way to say what he meant. Perhaps it could have been softer coming out. As he watches for a response, he notices the heave of the shoulders that fall with his sigh, and he slowly sinks a little lower into the hot waters. “Dammit.” Victor tries to think of what to do next, and what he knows best is praise, he’s so used to getting it after all. He’d just have to minimize flaws and maximize the wonderful things about his pupil.

The Russian chuckles gently, thinking on his favorite things about him, which fills his chest with the flutters again. “You know what I love best about you, Yuuri?”

There’s an audible gulp heard as he looks back up to him, his brown eyes were like a puppy who had just gotten in trouble, it nearly broke his heart, “What?” He peeps and turns around to look up at him.

The Coach strides over, kneeling before the statue beside the pools, reaching down to gesture for Yuuri’s hands, he pulls his hands above the surface and places them in Victor’s palms, they’re held dearly. “I love the music within you.”

Yuuri blinks, looking up at those blue eyes, unsure how he feels about it. Everyone has a signature line when they’re trying to comfort him, and this was much different than how he had received those words before. “It’s like you’re filled with it, and the only way to release it is to move your body. You barely know your potential, and I can’t wait until you see it, until you let me see more of it.”

The feeling in his throat was like a scream was waiting to get out, and it was growing, he wanted to whimper, and sob, and break out into tears, tell Victor there’s no potential left for him. Yet as he felt himself being pulled out of the water, Yuuri feels just a little bit stronger.

 

The evening grew late, the waters have only the ripples of the fountaining water pouring in, the halls were empty, except for one pair of footsteps that quietly thumped along the doorways. Yuuri is making sure any spare towels thrown outside the doors are being taken to the laundry room, it was nice to get some quiet time to himself.

Downstairs, Mari was pulling out some clean cloths, setting them in a wicker basket, seeing her brother coming down to bring some more down. “Hey,” She nods, stepping to the nearby table to roll the clean ones.

“hey, Mari.” He starts throwing the new load in, “I can finish those up if you want to go to bed, I’m going to be up a while.”

She sounds tempted by her thoughtful hum, “Nah, you have practice at 6am tomorrow; you should be the one getting to bed.”

“Yeah, but I can’t sleep….Too much on my mind.”

She looks over her shoulder, her little brother had a tendency to neglect self-care sometimes, and usually she would be nudging him to do little healthy things and get a better grasp on things. Recently, Victor had taken over on that, not that she minded, but he’s still learning about Yuuri, and can’t know how to help him with everything. “Anything you want to talk about?”

Standing up with the basket, he walks over to help her fold and roll them, “Hm? Nah, just feel like I need to have some time at the end of the day, get a little organized.”

Mari sighs gently, she’s had a few questions on her mind pressing since she saw them cuddled together, and was thinking about it for a long time, having stayed quiet the last few days. “….Hey, You know….It seems like you and Victor really care about each other.” She mentions, “I think it’s really great, how you like him?”

Watching out of the corner of her eye, she watches his face light up a little bit, but not with just happiness, a little anxious bite from his lip, and that’s when everything is confirmed for her. He answers quietly, “I do like him, he’s a skating god, but…he seems more human now. Like I can actually talk to him…I mean, it’s like he’s known me for years.”

“I’m glad, I’ll have to interrogate him.” Mari looks down at him, noticing he’s got a confused look on his face, “If my little brother’s got a crush, it’s my job, isn’t it?”

Yuuri’s basket drops and he fumbles all the rolled towels he was carrying until they’re back into a messy pile, he’s blushing all the way from his head down to his fingertips. “Wh-What are you talking about? I-I! …V-Victor? I mean, we uh…..Mari, maybe you’re mistaken, I uh…w…” He stammers, yet she starts up the stairs with a basket of clean towels.

“Finish up for me down here, will you?”


	16. Pure Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor is falling hard, and he can't figure out how to express it, he is walking on eggshells, and Yuuri is worried about his family figuring out about the situation of how he feels

The collision into the ground didn’t make that feeling in his head feel too great, but he couldn’t help it. His ears were thudding in a rhythm, his eyesight seemed like a broken camera that couldn’t focus and faded mostly everything out. Though he can hear some things around him, he’s slipping very quickly into a much needed rest, his body couldn’t handle being awake without food anymore, especially after hiking and skating like he did today.

“Gah! Yuuri!” Phichit tosses his selfie stick into Christophe’s arms and leans down to where his friend was sprawled out on the sidewalk, Victor looks absolutely shocked.

“…Does…Does he do that often?” He’s concerned, kneeling beside him, looking at his prodigy, once Yuuri’s eyes are closed completely, he gasps, “What do we do? Ah! Why did he pass out?”

“I don’t know! I don’t know!” Phichit looks around at them, in a little bit of a panic.

Christophe is the only one of them who doesn’t freak out, in fact, he pulls out his water bottle and unscrews it, dumping it on Yuuri’s flushed face. In shock from the water splashed on his face, he shakes his head, dripping wet as he looks up to the sky, and then down. “Gah! Who the…what…?” He blinks and looks at them. The faces he’s met with are filled with relief, and if his eyes weren’t ready to fall out of his skull, he’d be happier to see them. “Ugh….”

Victor puts his hands on his face, “Yuuri! What was that? What happened? Are you alright?” He nearly demanded to know, Phichit stands over him.

“Don’t sit up for a second, Yuuri, lay there a moment, catch your breath!”

He takes a deep breath and looks around, “ugh…..I……I’m sorry guys, I…I fell, didn’t I?” He mumbles, not registering much of what was happening anymore.

Christophe kneels down and takes his wrist to check his pulse, seeming to be the only calm one in the situation. “Yes, you dropped like a sack of potatoes. Yuuri, are you taking any medication right now?”

“N-No…” He closes his eyes for just a second, putting one of his hands over his eyes to block out the bright light. Also to hide his very embarrassed blush.

Victor looks to Christophe, confused. “…Did you go to medical school?”

“No, but I’ve seen the medicals work at the rink for those who have fainted.” He feels his forehead, “Yuuri, when was the last time you ate or drank?”

There’s a gentle grunt from him as he pulls his hand away, “Uh……Y…Yesterday at lunch…”

“Well, there you have it.”

Victor gasps, “Yuuri! You haven’t eaten anything and you haven’t even said anything?!” He suddenly sees his friend grimacing at the sound of his voice raising, frustrated at the way his head was pounding.

Phichit looks relieved, the most out of them all, “Is that all? Come on, I’ll treat you to some lunch, get that blood sugar back to normal, okay? You’re not used to going that long without food or sleep!” He pulls him to sit up very slowly, “Stay here, I’ll get you something from the car.”

Victor pouts, “What do you mean, ‘is that all?’, he fainted!” Without caring if he’s protesting, the coach lifts his pupil, bridal style, leaning his cheek against the top of Yuuri’s head.

He may have been pale before, but that sure helped bring some color to his face, a nice rouge to be exact. “Uh….Victor…I-I can walk! I just got really dizzy is all!”

“I’m taking you to get a big bowl of katsudon, even if I have to tbe the one to cook it for you.”

“Hey!” Phichit grabs his phone and then Christophe’s hand, following after, “We’re coming too!”

 

They watched Victor carry him all the way back home, quite impressive for being halfway across town, as Yuuri was trying to get down, to no avail. They get back in time to see Hiroko carrying in some spices for the mini party tonight, she almost drops them all seeing her son in the arms of their current guest. “Yuuri! What happened?”

“He passed out, his blood sugar is low.” Victor answers and brings him inside, setting him down to the cushions at the tables, “You. Stay there.” He prances off to the kitchen, followed by the quiet shuffle of Hiroko.

It’s quiet for a moment as Yuuri looks around his home, a little awkward all this had happened. This sort of attention was not usually what he wanted to attract. Phichit can’t help but erupt in the giggles. “…what? What’s so funny?”

Chris leans his elbow against the table and smiles as the young man continues to giggle away, it’s only for a small breath he is able to answer back after his giggle fit, “Badum dadum!” He starts humming the wedding march, causing Yuuri to be red in the face once more.

“Oh, Yuuri, are you excited for those wedding bells?” Chris snickers away, admiring the surroundings as he keeps an eye on the woozy friend.

“Oooh, guys, he wasn’t doing it like that!” He shushes them, shaking his head, but then groaning from his headache. They each lighten their tones after seeing him wince, and Chris passes over another water bottle, nudging him gently on the arm to take it. There’s no hesitation.

“You know,” Christophe hums, “You underestimate how much this man loves to love, Yuuri. When you have his affections, he will do everything he can for you.”

Phichit smiles and nods, “When we talked with him at the banquet, he was-“

They’re interrupted by a loud back, Makkachin prances over to Yuuri who doesn’t look happy at the extra noise, “Ooooohhh…” Yuuri wobbles a bit in his seat as he buries his head in his hands. “He’s got more people to care for than me you guys…” He mumbles and crosses his arms on the table, closing his eyes. This was the most comfortable he’d been all day, just face first into some darkness, though he wishes there was a blanket as well, and a pillow, maybe some….delicious bowl of eros.

There’s some muffled noises for a bit as he dozes off for what feels like a second, but then he lifts his head up, “Gah….sorry…ahem….” He rubs his eyes, noticing the room is…well, suddenly a little darker shade of sunlight than it was earlier.

Chris and Phichit are cuddling on the other side of the table while they’re by themselves, they look up surprised. “…Good morning, Yuuri.” Phichit chuckles, “Did you doze off there?”

“Hmng…No, I didn’t. I was…just thinking of what we were talking about….Did I win today? That’s right, I did…I won by default.” He mumbles again, sitting up and rubbing his eyes beneath his crooked and smudged glasses.

The calm voice of Victor is whispered right over his shoulder, a bowl of hot Katsudon gently being set before him, “You won because I chose you, Yuuri, you must believe that by now, da?”

Yuuri gasps and looks to his side, surprised that Victor had left that kitchen so soon after disappearing, “Gah!......” His nose is captured, after he was going to apologize or something close to that, he’s enthralled by the smell of that familiar pork cutlet bowl with a scent that hovers around him. “…Oh my god, this smells so good…”

The family brings out some trays, passing them out to the guests and sitting themselves down as well, Mari pats her brother’s shoulder. “Good job, Yuuri, your coach makes some good Katsudon.”

“What?” He looks to his mother who nods gently.

“I instructed Victor how to make it, he was very determined to learn.”

The coach enjoys the praise, and he passes the bowls around until he is without any himself. He sits down beside Yuuri and smiles, scooting the bowl closer to him and setting the chopsticks down. “Come on, Yuuri, get your strength back, eat.” 

He can’t get himself to take a bite, let alone even touch the perfection in a bowl. “Victor….” He gently picks it up, only to hold it up to him. “This wasn’t the deal.”

“I….” The whole room is shocked, “Yuuri, I don’t understand. You need to eat, get some energy in you.”

He hands his chopsticks to his coach, as well as the beloved bowl, the one he had been awaiting for months to be able to taste again. “I said I wanted to eat pork cutlet bowls with you, you need to have some too.”

It’s quiet, and Victor starts laughing gently, “I suppose…” He pulls out some more chopsticks, “We’ll just have to share.” They share a glance to each other, warm, comforting, a feeling that was like home. “Now take a bite before you faint again.

Phichit smiles and looks up to Christophe, reaching under the table and taking his boyfriend’s hand with a soft squeeze. Chris leans over and whispers, “Looks like we didn’t have to meddle too much after all.”

There’s a day filled with laughter and talking of memories, Victor and Chris share old stories of their shenanigans they used to get into as teens, Phichit talks about his favorite music al and how he wants to incorporate the music into this season, Mari talks about baby Yuuri and how cute he was.

Nobody has seemed to notice Yuuri has nodded off again, leaning into his hand, yet Victor has seen it. He pulls him into his arms, cradling him close and allowing his head to rest on his chest, with a free hand, he pulls the blue glasses off and folds them, setting them down on a napkin. He knew the boy was tired, and he’ll need all the energy he can muster for this season.

Mari stands up, looking to her parents. “Mom, Dad, I think it’s time we wrap up for the evening, we’ll do the dishes so Yuuri doesn’t have to.” They nod and stand up, starting to gather up the bowls, setting on trays, and taking them into the kitchen.

Christophe stands up and stretches, “We’ve got to leave, Phichit and I have to be on a flight at six tomorrow and we’re already pushing our sleep right now. Switzerland is next on the roster.” 

Phichit frowns a bit, “I really wanted to say goodbye to Yuuri, but I don’t think he can handle being woken up a third time,” He says worriedly, “Victor, will you at least make sure he’s comfortable in bed? He gets cold easy when he sleeps, so make sure he’s warm!”

“Of course, Phichit, I’ll be sure.”

They each pat Victor on the shoulder as not to disturb the sleeper, and they head out, holding hands as they do when it’s dark out. 

Victor looks down to his friend, smiling gently as he sleeps against his chest. It was concerning how Yuuri was so close to needing an actual doctor (maybe) and didn’t say a word to make sure everyone around him was happy first. His head leans down to kiss his forehead, petting his hair with his free hand, there’s a muffled him as he rocks him in his arms, wanting to make him comfortable and happy. “Oh, my poor, Yuuri…” Looking up, his blue eyes were met with another pair of Katsuki eyes, Mari stares, wide eyed at the pair as they’re cuddled up.

She looks quite shocked, and by the expression on her face, she’s already put some pieces together of what exactly Victor was doing. “…..Victor.”

“Mari, I-….”

“Is this why you came?” She asks, staring him down with stern connections of words to say in her head, “Did you come here to be is coach or to be hi-“

“Nonono…” he whispers, making sure Yuuri is still asleep. “I came to be his coach, Mari….He asked me to at the last banquet, and I kept my promise. The feelings just….they started growing and I haven’t been able to stop them….” He almost looks quite protective, holding onto him as though this is the end and he had to savor every last moment against him. 

Mari looks at the doorway to be sure her parents aren’t in there, “….does anyone else know?”

He sighs gently, “Phichit and Chris, and….Yuuri if he’s been listening…” He looks down.

The big sister instinct to protect him starts coming down a little bit, Yuuri can handle himself, but that doesn’t mean she won’t be worried. “….I’ll….I’ll let him come to me.” She sighs and looks up to him. “But if I get any red flags from you, your forehead will be my new ashtray.”

There’s a breath of relief and he looks at the doorway. “I’m going to make sure he gets into his bed and I’ll come help you all clean up, okay? He’s going to get a stiff neck from laying like this.” She nods to him and turns to go into the kitchen.

Relaxing a bit, Victor hopes he hasn’t absolutely opened a door that shouldn’t have been opened, he couldn’t bear to witness his chances with Yuuri to be happy to wither away.

 

There is a soft sunshine that glows in the cracks of Yuuri’s window, a big curly poodle is laying on one of his arms and his phone is plugged in above his head at the nightstand. The spring is bustling with guests who came for the event of Hot springs on ice. His brown eyes gently peek open, the headache was gone, a little hungry from his hibernation, but infinitely better than the day before. There’s a twinge of guilt that Phichit and Chris, guests in his home, ended up watching him sleep instead of catching up. He grabs his phone, clicking it to check the time, only to see-OH FUCK HE’S LATE.

Victor is at the rink, he figured Yuuri would sleep in, in fact, he was deep in thought about if having Makkachin sleep in his bed would have been a good decision to keep him warm with the thick comforter. On the side of the rink, he’s spent part of the evening making piroshki’s, sitting in a paper bag in case sleeping beauty forgot to eat breakfast on his way here. “He’s probably freaking out, how adorable.”

The door kicks open, he’s rushing in, apologizing profusely, so fast the words don’t register as a complete sentence. Victor laughs and claps his hands, “Yuuri, I’m quite impressed with how late you are!” the student thrwos himself before him, still repeating the sorrys. 

“I must look so weak! So helpless! Aaauuugh!!!!” He is thoroughly embarrassed, he doesn’t expect the paper bag just shoved before his face.

“You should have some breakfast before we begin, Da?” He gulps, the lump in his throat he just tried to swallow was plenty filling.

“And he made me food? He must think I can’t take care of myself, oh god…” Slowly he takes the bag, mumbling his gratitude and slinking to the edge of the ice, to the seats nearby to munch.

Victor has noticed how shy he is, and he frowns, watching him eat quietly from afar. Perhaps he’s still not feeling well from yesterday, maybe he had needed more time to heal up after passing out on the sidewalk. Clearing his throat, he skates around in circles for a bit, letting him take his time eating some protein filled pastries. “We didn’t take him to a doctor or anything…perhaps I should do so today, make sure he’s definitely alright. He’s about as nervous as he was when I first got here, I thought we were making progress.”

 

Practice goes with many distractions, even with Victor nudging him, trying to get his confidence back up to the Eros mode he had before, he’s fidgeting, he’s not making eye contact. As much as he wants to bring it up, he knows deep down that Yuuri won’t want to talk about it, he lets it fester, and build up until it explodes in some form. He’s noticed this just in the little booms, he’s not quite there yet for the full on, and he has no idea what’ll be coming for him.

It’s been three days since they first began actual coaching, Yuuri’s eyebrows are furrowed and his movements are stiff, he’s resorted to preparing to fall rather than preparing to land for his jumps. Victor’s taking notes in a small booklet to keep track, though it’s all steel trapped into his head. He puts on the biggest smile he can when Yuuri drops onto the ice with a loud thud. “I’ve started to notice you tend to flub your jumps when there’s something on your mind! Care to share?” He puts on the kindest voice he can muster for that, and he’s met with a shaking head and getting back up to try the jump again. “…Yuuri, how am I supposed to coach you when you’re not speaking with me?”

“I’m just….tired, Victor.” He states quietly, though every time he looks over his shoulder, he feels intimidated by the mere presence of his coach.

 

Victor tilts his head gently, “….Ah, yes, tired…I’m sure, you’ve been working very hard with no breaks recently.” He tells him, “Though it must feel good to have me as a coach, since you won me! Over a gold medalist really!” “Oh my sweet Yuuri, perhaps this will raise that confidence a little!”

He skates over and adjusts his blade, “I won by default…”

”Ah, perhaps not…” He clears his throat, “Perhaps I can explain better how you won another time, Yuuri. Have you thought of what you want to do for your other routine? Your free program?”

Yuuri looks up, a little confused, “Hm? ….I’ve never choreographed my own program, Coach Celestino has always chosen my music and my routine.” At least they’re on another subject, so that’s good. He’d never really been absolutely in love with a certain way to move on the ice, he’s always just glad to be on it, whether he’s beautiful, whether he’s mediocre, even during Eros, he was just glad to be there.

“Perhaps you should give it some thought, give me an idea of what you love and we’ll put it together, and I do mean we, Yuuri.” He looks at the time, “Looks as though we should head back to the springs, you seem stiff, so you should take a dip with me, yes?” As Yuuri was about to refuse, he gives a look, he’s been worried lately, and has been deep in thought just on the basics, how was he going to make this man a champion if he never believed he could do it?

Yuuri saw the expression and he nods gently, “Okay, I’ll come take a dip.”

 

Through the next couple days, after hoping it would lift somehow, Victor found himself struggling to spend more than a few minutes with Yuuri that wasn’t with actual coaching. His friendship was getting thinned out over a period of time, and he couldn’t figure out why.

Yuuri is chin deep in the spring’s hot pools, his glasses set aside, and his attention along with them. He couldn’t bring himself to say much, though that wasn’t too different from his usual self, he heard his own thoughts more than his voice most days. Victor peeks out the glass door at him, wrapped in his green robe and beside Mari who’s refilling towels on a shelf. “Mari….Is he alright?”

She glances over, then out the door where Yuuri was stewing under a dark cloud of his own despair, he looked tired. “…I don’t know, but he does look upset.”

“Why? Did something happen? Everything seemed fine just this past week…”

“I wish I knew what his emotional turmoil was about all the time, but people with anxiety and depression can be set off by anything.” Mari takes a draw from her cigarette, then turns to the next shelf with her laundry basket.

Victor frowns, “And…he told Chris he doesn’t take any medications when he passed out…” Perhaps he could help his dear friend a bit, maybe the confidence the poor piggy lacked had something to do with it. Yet he knew Yuuri hated being fussed over, he had to be delicate. “…Thank you, Mari. I think I can figure out a way to help somehow.” Walking out, Victor tosses aside his robe to the side of the spring, and starts doing stretches, “Yuuri!” He grunts ,doing some toe touches, “I want to talk to you about lowering the difficulty on some jumps in your program.”

“Wait, what?” He looks over his shoulder, only to get an eyeful of some Russian junk, he whips his head forward again with a blush. “I-I need the points! We can’t just make it lower and expect gold!”

“Who says? If we just adjust it to your abilities, like performance, where you always have higher marks, you won’t need the jumps you aren’t able to land.” As the words come out, he senses perhaps that’s not the best way to say what he meant. Perhaps it could have been softer coming out. As he watches for a response, he notices the heave of the shoulders that fall with his sigh, and he slowly sinks a little lower into the hot waters. “Dammit.” Victor tries to think of what to do next, and what he knows best is praise, he’s so used to getting it after all. He’d just have to minimize flaws and maximize the wonderful things about his pupil. 

The Russian chuckles gently, thinking on his favorite things about him, which fills his chest with the flutters again. “You know what I love best about you, Yuuri?”

There’s an audible gulp heard as he looks back up to him, his brown eyes were like a puppy who had just gotten in trouble, it nearly broke his heart, “What?” He peeps and turns around to look up at him.

The Coach strides over, kneeling before the statue beside the pools, reaching down to gesture for Yuuri’s hands, he pulls his hands above the surface and places them in Victor’s palms, they’re held dearly. “I love the music within you.”

Yuuri blinks, looking up at those blue eyes, unsure how he feels about it. Everyone has a signature line when they’re trying to comfort him, and this was much different than how he had received those words before. “It’s like you’re filled with it, and the only way to release it is to move your body. You barely know your potential, and I can’t wait until you see it, until you let me see more of it.”

The feeling in his throat was like a scream was waiting to get out, and it was growing, he wanted to whimper, and sob, and break out into tears, tell Victor there’s no potential left for him. Yet as he felt himself being pulled out of the water, Yuuri feels just a little bit stronger.

 

The evening grew late, the waters have only the ripples of the fountaining water pouring in, the halls were empty, except for one pair of footsteps that quietly thumped along the doorways. Yuuri is making sure any spare towels thrown outside the doors are being taken to the laundry room, it was nice to get some quiet time to himself.

Downstairs, Mari was pulling out some clean cloths, setting them in a wicker basket, seeing her brother coming down to bring some more down. “Hey,” She nods, stepping to the nearby table to roll the clean ones.

“hey, Mari.” He starts throwing the new load in, “I can finish those up if you want to go to bed, I’m going to be up a while.”

She sounds tempted by her thoughtful hum, “Nah, you have practice at 6am tomorrow; you should be the one getting to bed.”

“Yeah, but I can’t sleep….Too much on my mind.” 

She looks over her shoulder, her little brother had a tendency to neglect self-care sometimes, and usually she would be nudging him to do little healthy things and get a better grasp on things. Recently, Victor had taken over on that, not that she minded, but he’s still learning about Yuuri, and can’t know how to help him with everything. “Anything you want to talk about?”

Standing up with the basket, he walks over to help her fold and roll them, “Hm? Nah, just feel like I need to have some time at the end of the day, get a little organized.”

Mari sighs gently, she’s had a few questions on her mind pressing since she saw them cuddled together, and was thinking about it for a long time, having stayed quiet the last few days. “….Hey, You know….It seems like you and Victor really care about each other.” She mentions, “I think it’s really great, how you like him?”

Watching out of the corner of her eye, she watches his face light up a little bit, but not with just happiness, a little anxious bite from his lip, and that’s when everything is confirmed for her. He answers quietly, “I do like him, he’s a skating god, but…he seems more human now. Like I can actually talk to him…I mean, it’s like he’s known me for years.”

“I’m glad, I’ll have to interrogate him.” Mari looks down at him, noticing he’s got a confused look on his face, “If my little brother’s got a crush, it’s my job, isn’t it?”

Yuuri’s basket drops and he fumbles all the rolled towels he was carrying until they’re back into a messy pile, he’s blushing all the way from his head down to his fingertips. “Wh-What are you talking about? I-I! …V-Victor? I mean, we uh…..Mari, maybe you’re mistaken, I uh…w…” He stammers, yet she starts up the stairs with a basket of clean towels.

“Finish up for me down here, will you?”


	17. Perhaps it's Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri is getting comfortable with the thought of coming out to his family, but first he wants to talk to Victor

His sister knows. God dammit, his sister knows. All he’s been so good at hiding for years suddenly felt like an open wound, felt vulnerable for anyone to destroy. Had she seen the makeup or heels hidden his room and assumed? Has anyone else seen it? Did she see him look at Victor a certain way?

Thinking of what he could say or do to talk to Mari without revealing more, he can’t really think of anything, she seemed so supportive. The deepest fear he held to himself was having an unaccepting family cast him aside in rejection of what gender he would fall for. He needed to talk to someone, but he knew he couldn’t interrupt Phichit on vacation, and the Nishigori family couldn’t be the only people he could talk to constantly. They had a family they were busy with.

Skating was hard to do when one has all these questions running through their mind, Yuuri was frail within the shell of his stern face, and he fears breaking apart at the mention of the littlest thing. Victor noticed the expression on him, and hopes its fuel for inspiration or determination as he works his best to put together a new free program for the upcoming season. “Yuuri! As much as I love your determined face, you’re slacking in the emotion department.” He calls as Yuuri attempts a quad loop, and without even thinking about he, he falls back into the habit of preparing to fall instead of land, he thumps onto the ice and slides a bit. “Careful now!”

He groans and stands back up, he’d taken worse hits than that, but he was out of breath. Having done that jump over and over again to warm up his liftoff, it was unlike him to flub a jump just because he’s distracted. A skater’s body can handle the falls most times, but the stamina filled man is almost lackluster to conflict with his expression. Slowly, he skates to the edge of the rink to catch his breath, then stretches out his arms and bends gently to loosen up his back. “Yuuri, you have to put some emotion into this, show me you love it!” Yet there’s not much of a response, he just continues to pant and stretch out, “…Have you ever been in love? How about you tell me about the first time a girl said she loved y-…”

The deep shout that replied in an angry, “WHAT?” echoed around the entire rink, as soon as it bounced off the wall, it lingered in the ringing of ears. Victor was shocked such an aggressive sound could be made by his pupil, he must have definitely struck some sort of nerve. It came with a scowl, his panting breath hissing between clenched teeth. Yet just as soon as his outburst came and left, the softness returns in his voice, “…I’m so sorry, Victor, I didn’t mean to snap at you…”

“No, I understand. I forgot you haven’t had a lover before.” He places a hand on his shoulder, ‘You look overwhelmed, care to talk about it?”

“No.” He shakes his head, turning back to the ice to begin again, skating to the center to begin again. Victor frowns, wishing he would talk to him at least, ever since he fainted, he worried about him.

After practice, Yuuri wanted to eat dinner in his room, and go to sleep immediately. He wanted to be alone and take time for himself. “If Mari knows…what if the rest of my family knows? Russia has actual laws against LGBT communities last I heard, and victor may seem alright, but…” He grunts against the thought, _“He was alright to Chris and Phichit when they talked about their relationship…. What if he loses credibility with having a gay student?”_ This shatters him to think about, _“Oh god, what if he finds out I like him?”_ It was like glass breaking little by little in his chest.

“Yuuri!” Calls the Russian accent from the other side of the door, causing him to gasp, “Let’s have a slumber party! I want to talk!”

“U-Um…no thanks, Victor! I’m tired!” He peeps and pulls his blanket up, ignoring the knocking as best he can.

Victor sighs and takes the pillow back to his room after a minute of knocking, Makkachin lingers to scratch at the door and whine a bit. He wonders what on earth happened to the foundation they had just a few days ago.

 

The next morning, Yuuri stayed beneath his comforter, his head was counting the seconds he had ignored the alarm, snooze button being pressed every few minutes as it had been the past hour and a half. He was late for practice, and he battled with his conscience to get up and face the day.

Victor had other plans that didn’t involve a cooped up Katsudon, he opens the door roughly, without knocking. He’s not going to give him an option to shut him down by denying his knocking again. “Yuuri!” He calls, loud enough to make the pupil startled, he sits up and turns his head to look at him. “We’re taking a day off from training, just you and I.” He sounds demanding, and Yuuri won’t take no for an answer today.

“…. O-Okay…” He peeps from his cushy cocoon, trembling a little. “U….um…. I’ll get dressed…” Victor nods and shuts the door, rubbing his temples; as much as he adored Yuuri, this conflict avoidance would never get anywhere, and he strongly believed in communication to solve problems. He sighs at his own thoughts in annoyance, “Just because he handles problems differently doesn’t mean I have a right to be angry with him, I must be patient and hope that he can take care of himself…”

When the door slides back open, Yuuri brings out his dishes from the night before, staying quiet as he shuffles past his mentor and down the hall to wash his dinner dishes. _“Don’t look at him, Yuuri, you’re bound to be getting a lecture today…”_

He can hear Victor following behind him and it makes him stiffen up and pay attention to his padding footsteps along the wood floor. Yet as they enter the kitchen, Victor steps over to where Hiroko stood, who seems to have packed some box lunches for them. “Thank you for doing this, Hiroko, I’ll have to cook for you sometime this week to show my gratitude.”

She has a big smile on her face, “Vkusno!” Looks up to him, “Right? Did I say it right?” He laughs and nods.

“Pafekuto!” he responds in Japanese to her, causing them to giggle with each other. They must be teaching each other little words to be able to communicate, how heartwarming that when his mother knows little English, he makes the effort to find some way to communicate.

Yuuri sets his dishes in the sink, glancing over as they interact, his mother has welcome into their home not only as a guest, but like another son.

Hiroko turns around and pecks Yuuri’s cheek, going back to cooking for the other guests at the spring, “You two have fun today!”

Perhaps his coach had planned the day out already, knowing how much he adored organizing events and performances, he wouldn’t put it past him.

“Are you ready, Yuuri?” He nods to Victor, getting the leash for the brown poodle.

 

Victor sits beside Yuuri on the beach, gazing out at the busy waters, the roar of the waves covered with the sounds of gulls that flew above them. Even sitting in silence on the rifts beside the ocean, Victor could look at it forever, and part of him wishes it were possible. Yuuri had never taken the time to really sit and look around, having lived here most of his life, it was hard to find anything surprisingly beautiful as you pass it every day to work. “I miss home, sometimes.” The Russian man breaks the silence between them first, “I grew up hearing the sea gulls every day, and when I started traveling as a skater, I never knew I could ache to hear it again.”

Yuuri’s attention goes up to the clouded sky, his own heart ached for home that way before, especially when he would walk alongside the Detroit river. “I missed the food here, Americanized Japanese food is nothing like home. Everything is fried and has cheese, and comes with weird cookies they say are traditional, but we don’t have those here.”

Victor chuckles, knowing the familiar food he’s had in other countries. “Traveling forced me to learn how to make my favorite foods using substitute ingredients. There’s no Russian restaurants for me to get my Rassolnik soup from.” That cracked a smile from his friend. “What was the worst food you had out there? Mine was a frozen taco from some drive through when I was drunk.”

“That’s hard to say, might be hot dogs, I got mine from a gas station though, can’t say I’m terribly fond of how that tasted.” Victor laughs and leans back to lay on the sand, shuddering at the thought.

“That sounds awful.”

“Well, Phichit had lived there a bit already when I moved over, so he showed me the best places to go. It wasn’t as bad as it could have been.” He sits back with him, the air less tense than it was before.

It was almost therapeutic to just sit there, admire what it felt like to be home, to be a stone’s throw away yet be in a different world entirely. Being next to his idol made it much better, but he was happy to just sit beside him. “I haven’t been the best to Victor, ignoring him all this time when he’s just trying to make sure I’m alright.” He takes a deep breath, glancing over to him. “…. When I was in Detroit, one of our skating friends got hurt, myself and a classmate of mine who was at the rink took him to an urgent clinic. She tried to comfort me and I shoved her away.”

“…. Why would you do that, Yuuri?”

“I thought….” He sighs gently, “I didn’t want her to think I was weak. All she was trying to do was make sure I wasn’t freaking out and I couldn’t handle it.” Victor starts understanding a little bit, how he must feel right now with someone he’s looked up to versus that classmate he didn’t know very well. The feelings must be magnified. “It made me think of everyone back home, Minako, the Nishigori family, my family… they never treated me like I was a weakling. They had faith that I would continue to grow, and they let me do it, helping me without ever making me feel weak.”

His hand slides over to hold onto Yuuri’s. “… You’re not a weak person, anyone who knows you can see that.” They sit there a moment quietly, looking up to the gulls again. “Yuuri….” He turns over to look at him. “What do you want me to be to you?” Though the Japanese man stares forward, sitting up again, he crosses his arms, closing off that question quietly. “A father figure?”

“No…”

“A friend then?” He hums in response, Yuuri wanted him in ways he couldn’t say without having a heart attack trying to say it. “…A lover then, I’ll do my best.” He tells Yuuri, part of him wanting to see his reaction on it, the other part curious to if he’d answer.

He jumps up, not expecting such a smooth transition into that familiar topic of relationships that Victor always seemed to inquire about, “V-Victor!”

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I ju-“

“I want is for you to be who you are!” That’s when Victor got curious, looking up to him. “I look up to you, I always have.” He shuffles his feet, tucking his hands in his sweater pockets. “I was afraid to let you see my shortcomings… I guess that’s why I’ve been avoiding you.” He gulps, “I’ll make it up to you by skating my best.”

The familiar heart-shaped smile of Victor’s is enough sunshine to brighten every cloud in the sky, and he holds his hand out, “It’s a deal, I won’t let you off easy. That’s my way of showing my love.”

The word catches in his throat when he says it aloud, Love, the almighty word that most fear and hope for at the same time. Yet Yuuri doesn’t look scared. Yuuri takes his hand and shakes it, smiling softly. “When I open up…he meets me halfway.”

 

After their talk, the week seems to get better and better, Yuuri heard back from the musician college friend who was going to rewrite his music, Victor was going to teach him all those jumps, and it’s making it easier to be able to think.

With this free time, Yuuri has considered his personal life, what Mari had said before, and if it was time to talk to someone about exactly who and what he was. Phichit had come out to his family, who were at one point incredibly strict about what sexuality meant, and what he should be. Perhaps he should consider how his parents would feel about him, and how Victor would think of him afterwards.

He decides to talk to Victor first, and if he takes it well, then maybe he can get the confidence to talk to those he’s felt support from forever. He had his concerns, no doubt, but the thought of coming out to him is oddly more comforting to do than the others he’s hidden this from.

Yuuri stands before the sliding door of the banquet room, he’s got a shaky breath as he looks around, in case his family would see him there so late and assume something. With a shaken hand, he slowly knocks. “Come in!” Calls the cheerful voice on the other side, making him jump gently. Yuuri takes a moment, then cracks the door and peeks through, just wide enough for his blushing red face to poke through. “Yuuri?” He looks genuinely concerned. “Is everything okay? Are you going out? Let me get my coat.” Victor stands up out of bed and grabs his tan coat.

“No! No! I’m….I’m just visiting.” He says and looks around, holding onto a pillow and hugging it gently as he stands, hesitating to step in completely.

Victor looks down to the pillow and starts understanding, “Are you coming in for a slumber party?” He chuckles, gesturing to point at the pillow. “Come in! Come in! Sit with me!” He approaches the futon again and sits atop the blankets, patting beside him.

In his mind, it was like gaining the trust of a new puppy, and it was almost so precious he wanted to take pictures. Of course, he leaves his phone alone, and Yuuri closes the door behind him, shuffling over and sitting at the foot of the bed. “I-I want to talk…” Victor’s excitement starts sizzling down as he hears the frightened tone, “I-I need to talk to someone, and I don’t know who else I want to go to, and I’ve wanted to talk to you for a while…”

“Please, Yuuri.” He nods to him, “Let me help you, what can I do for you?”

There was a deep breath as he squeezed his pillow and crossed his legs to get ahold of his words. “Well…I…. I had a conversation with Mari, and I’m…” He loses his words again and gulps again.

The happy feelings are gone, in fact, they freeze entirely of what is about to happen.  
“I don’t care anymore if you know, Victor…. But I think it’s fair to tell you this…” He presses his forehead down into the fluffy pillow, shaking terribly. “I-I’m…. G-G….” He wants to say it, he desperately does, but he feels like he’s about to cry. “…. Gay…” He whimpers, eyes growing hot and wet. “I-I know Russia isn’t very tolerant of the gay community and…. I-if you think of me differently, I understand, but-but…. You don’t seem to m-mind…”

Victor’s heart broke, there was a relief in his breathing again, and he interrupts him with a gentle shush, “Yuuri, look at me…” The brown eyes rise up to meet his, still shaking terribly, jaw clenched. “…I know.”

“…. You…what?” The tears that started to drip are quickly wiped away.

“When you confronted me after I assigned you Eros, you told me.” He looks utterly shocked, not sure what to say next. “You were rambling and frustrated, you must have said it without even thinking about it!”

Yuuri rubs his eyes, gulping. “So…You’re not against it? You…You chose me anyway?”

Victor chuckles and looks down to his own fingers. “Being gay doesn’t make you a bad skater, let alone a bad person… After all, look at me.” Yuuri gasps, absolutely shocked.

“…You?” He nods back, Victor looks down again and fiddles with his phone.

“I’m Russia’s role model, and if anyone else knew, I’m not sure they would have me performing and competing in the Olympics or the Grand Prix Final.”

Yuuri knows Victor has probably held it in for a while, he didn’t have the luxury of training in another country where it was accepted, having friends he could be openly queer around. Of all people, he needed the support more, and his mind raced to figure out how he could show the same care and comfort that he had received. He sets his pillow aside, “Victor?” He looks up with those puppy dog eyes, and crawls over the blanket to wrap his arms around his coach, trying to give the most loving hug he can. “…Thank you.”

Against the side of his black haired head, he can feel the smile he’s seen a million times press against him as he’s hugged in return.

“Thank you for trusting me, Yuuri.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's a short chapter, but I had a lot of organized thoughts to put into this!


	18. Definite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri is confronting his feelings of how he lives his life, and he's going to talk to his family and hope they support him in what he decides

Victor enjoys the summer evening walk with Makkachin, the wind that is sprinkled with the mist of the ocean is salty, yet refreshing. He had let himself have alone time, which is rare nowadays, being so immersed in this town which has grown to know him on a first-name basis. He knew the names of the people in the stores and gas stations, though most of them still seemed stunned at the mighty view of the idol. Not that he minded, I mean, he is Victor Nikiforov, let’s be honest here. He’s memorized the route he walks on, and he trails the boardwalk and takes a shortcut through town back to the Onsen.

He walks through the open tourist stands, which have grown accustomed to the rise in the visitors, thanks to the presence of new skaters. Some were selling products advertising victor’s skating career, like posters and figurines with misspelled Russian words on them. It made him chuckle, and as he passes them, there’s something else that catches his eye, a Katsuki Yuuri poster. Victor is immediately smitten.

It looks like a picture that had been taken at the Hot Springs on Ice competition just a few months prior. Though how they got this beautiful angle of his Yuuri while he was in the middle of the ice, it remains mysterious. Without hesitation, he grabs his wallet, asking how much it was, dropping some extra coinage in on that.

The elderly woman looks up, surprised to see the product of her sales was before her, she smiles bright, “  
1200 YEN!” Squeaks as she holds her hand out for the currency, looking quite star struck.

Victor rolls up the poster, holding it close to his chest as he gently tugs on the leash to direct his exploring poodle towards a certain direction. “I can’t wait to put this up when we get home…” He was so thrilled to have the poster; he hadn’t even heard himself he internally called this place home.

There was a buzz in his front pocket, “Hm?” Glancing down to reach for it, it buzzes again, in fact, four or five. “…. Christophe better not have seen a video of Yuuri again.” Pulling it out, he types in his password, and clicks on the pop up notification. “…. The assignments!”

Yuuri was cleaning dishes when he heard the thumping steps running through the front lobby, followed by the clicking claws of a puppy dog. “Yuuri!” Turning his head, he just sees Victor slide in on his socks, holding the phone up. “The assignments are in!”

“Already?” he frowns, nervously grabbing a towel to dry his hands and rushing over.

Yuuri takes a moment to read, his family gathers at the door to figure out what all the commotion was about. “…Cup of China! I’m in!” He laughs, hugging his coach excitedly.\

Victor blinks at the words, why wouldn’t Yuuri have gotten in?

“Mom! Dad! I made it!” he runs over to them to give them a squeeze, they smile and Mari pats his back affirmatively. “I-I have to call Minako!” Passing the phone back to his coach, then rushes to go get his own cell.

With a grin, Victor starts over to his room to hang up his poster, he wants it on the door to wish him luck coming and going. He can hear the excited chitter of the happy Katsudon all the way where he was; if only he could bottle up that joy and give it to him when he’s upset.

 

The next day, the house is filled with celebration, a morning brunch with Minako, the Nishigori family, a few guests, and the happy family.

“Block championships?” Victor asks, looking around the room of friends and family, “What are those?”

Yuko, who starts cleaning up the little confetti poppers looks over, “Oh, that’s right! You haven’t had to do those before, have you, Victor?” He shakes his head, “They’re sub-competitions to be able to qualify for the grand prix series.”

Yuuri pets the colorful paper off his head, and looks embarrassed as can be. Takeshi crosses his arms, “I don’t know if you remember, Victor, but Yuuri got 11th place last season? Didn’t even qualify for the final at one point?”

“I wish I could forget…” Yuuri mumbles, Victor can see his insecurity rising up in his chest by that deep breath he takes. “I’ll have to compete and then we’ll see how the Grand Prix Final goes.”

“Which of course you’ll breeze right through!” He smiles, petting his pupil’s shoulder. “No way I’ll be letting you get away from me that easy!” Come September, you’re going to be the emperor of the ice!”

Takeshi can see the encouragement make Yuuri glow a little, he tilts his head and glances between them warily. Nudging his wife, he gestures to the two who sit close and hesitate to break any gaze of their eyes meeting, but perhaps it’s not best to just outright say anything. Takeshi worries about if Yuuri’s getting ahead of himself in this situation, working with his crush and working like he was. He’ll have to keep an eye out to make sure if he can help out somehow, he’s available. Despite their friendship being a bit more distant, there’s a feeling of brotherly protection towards his younger friend.

Takeshi clears his throat, “Hey! Girls!” He looks to his three daughters, “Some of the Katsuki family members look a little befuddled on how those ranks work. Why don’t you explain a little better?”

Axel, Lux, and Loop gasp excitedly, and they grab their markers to draw pictures and help teach. Meanwhile, he walks over, tapping Yuuri’s shoulder, “Hey, I want to talk to you really quick, my car is sounding kind of funky and I need a second opinion.”

Yuuri looks over and nods, standing to follow him outside, the warm air filled with the quiet noise of the town the moment they open the door. The pair go out to the family van, climbing into the front seats, he turns on the engine. Yuuri listens for any strange sound he’s supposed to be looking for, any minute now it would show up, he’s sure. “Hey…I’m really happy for you, Kiddo.” He says, though it’s easy to tell now by that tone that the car is just fine.

“…You don’t’ sound like it, what’s wrong?"

Takeshi rubs the crook of his nose, sighing, “Yuuri, I…I think we need to talk about you and Victor.” There’s a confused expression on his face, “You look at him like he’s a god, and I don’t know what you think is…going to happen after this… You win gold, you get sponsors, you bring Hasetsu back to the map, but…what happens when Victor isn’t here anymore? Are you going to be okay?’

Yuuri looks down again, frowning as his face usually defaults to. “…Nothing else has to happen, I’ll be happy being this close to him right now…” Takeshi opens his mouth to speak, “And you’re wrong.” Yuuri interrupts. “I don’t think he’s a deity or a god, he’s just like me.”

“…How do you figure?” Takeshi was at least glad to hear it, but he’s still quite concerned.

“He has flaws, but I love them…. He’s not some sort of perfect person who does no wrong. But just because I’m looking up to him does not mean I think he’s a god.”

Yuuri sounded fierce, ready to defend any feelings he has towards his coach like a beast.

“…Good…. I was worried.” They sit there a minute in silence, the car still running, and he looks over to his younger friend, then to the window where Victor interacted with the family. “…So…You love him then.”

Yuuri jolts in his seat, looking over, “I-I said I loved his flaws!” He bashfully defends.

Takeshi turns off the car, “Same thing,” He chuckles, stepping out and starting back inside, a little less concerned for his friend.

Yuuri sighs and climbs out, he’s been tense, thinking of competitions and the future occupied his head. He’d survived 23 years without Victor right beside him, he could handle life without him…but he doesn’t want to spend any amount of time ever thinking he would leave.

 

Tonight was a good time to talk to his family, he’d waited until the night, when the Katsuki family all gathered in the front room with the cushions.

Yet Yuuri was pacing in Victor’s room, not sure if he’s going to say it without crying like he did to Victor. His coach wanted to help, but he’s not sure how, Yuuri even made flashcards, like this was an anxiety ridden project. “O-Okay…okay, I can do this, I can do…Can I do this? I don’t know if I can do this, Victor, do they really need to know?”

“Yuuri, come here, talk to me.” He gestures for him to sit beside him on the futon bed, seeing him this nervous was brand new, he’s noticed Yuuri has let him see different levels of his anxiety since they’ve spent time together.

The Japanese skater just shakes his head, “No! I have to do this; I just need to calm down…”

Victor had been helping him figure when to come out to his family, how to say it, what to do in any situation that would follow. They’d come up with a plan all the way down to the financials; if they were accepting, they’d go shopping and cook a loving family meal to celebrate, if they weren’t accepting, there were suitcases ready to go to St. Petersburg with Victor.

Seeing his pupil this way was awful, he’d never known what to do when his friends were this nervous. He stands and approaches him, wrapping his arms around him in an embrace to keep him from pacing further. It stops the babbling, but there are still little whimpers muffling into his shirt. Gently he shifts from foot to foot, the taller one making them dance slowly as he can. IT reminded him of the banquet when they were wandering into the hotel lobby, the rest of the world around them muted except for background noise. Yet even in the moments of worry, Victor cherished reliving this moment, soberly cuddled into a sway, “I need you to breathe….” He tells him, “And then I need to tell me if you’re okay.”

Yuuri pulls his face out of that shirt and he starts taking a slow deep breath, already feeling how much it helps, like it was peeling the anxious shivers away. After a moment, he nods and buries his face back against his dancing partner’s chest, he didn’t realize this was a familiar situation, but it felt like home.

Looking down at him like this, so much despair in his eyes, the way he leaned against him, Victor wants nothing more than to make him smile like they did on their first night sleeping in that hotel room. “ _Wouldn’t’ it be funny if…I asked to kiss him again?”_ Though a voice that sat in his head protested, he couldn’t take advantage of how vulnerable he felt right now.

They let go, and take the journey down from the guest rooms to the relaxing area, and as much as Victor wants to go with him, Yuuri turns his head to look up at him. “…. Wait for me in the kitchen, okay?”

“…. Okay, I’ll be here for you.”

Yuuri shuffles down the stairs, looking around at his mom and dad sitting in their cushions before the television, Mari is reading in her own seat a few tables over. They look up at the new body in the room, and casually greet him before going back to where they were. “Um…Hey guys…” He smiles gently, fiddling with his hands, “I was wondering if I could…talk to you…”

The sound of her son’s nervous voice caught Hiroko’s face, she turns to see him fiddling with his hands, “Is everything alright, Yuuri?” Toshiya hears the tone as well and looks over, adjusting his glasses. Mari sets her book aside, taking the long draw from her cigarette, then nodding with a supportive glance.

Victor stands in the kitchen, gently pacing around the island counter, the walls were thin, he could hear muffling, but he would have to be patient to wait and hear.

 

Yuuri kneels on the floor, his hands clench, his glasses inch gently down his nose when he looks down. In his shaking hands are his notecards, and he gulps as he gets the first one out. “…. For a long time, I haven’t been sure how to talk about this…because you don’t discuss it…and…I…” He loses his words, a smudge that must have come from his teary eyes earlier, he tries flipping through the cards, losing exactly where he is. “I…. I’m sorry, I….” He shuffles through them nervously.

Toshiya tilts his head, “Yuuri, what is this about?”

 

The shuffling through the carefully planned words has been lost, and he slows down, sighing and looking up to them. The inside of his chest felt like concrete had filled his lungs and heart. “I…. I don’t like girls…” He gulps, looking down again to his hands as they clench.

Hiroko looks surprised, the most out of them all. “…What do you like?”

“I-I like men….” He states with a squeak, he wants to ramble on like he usually does, but he’s made himself promise to be direct.

Toshiya looks to Mari, and then back to his son, “How long have you hidden this?”

Thinking back on it was not painful, but it’s not his favorite thing to look back on, how often he would hide everything from his parents. “I’ve known for a long time, since I was twelve…” He mumbles, “I-I want to know your thoughts…”

Mari is wary to speak, looking to their parents who both seem shocked to say the least. Hiroko thinks deeply, “So…you like only men?” He nods, “…So you won’t be giving us grandchildren.”

For some reason, he didn’t expect that, as it didn’t seem like that would be the big concern. “…Uh…well, whatever I decide in the future, adoption or surrogacy is always an option, but….”

Toshiya lets out a hearty laugh, “Well, so long as it’s an option, I suppose.” Hiroko giggles herself.

The sound of laughter is crumbling that concrete in his chest, the weight getting lighter and lighter. “I can’t say I understand entirely,” His mother begins, “I just wish you told us sooner, you know we love you no matter what, Yuuri.”

All those fears, the packing, the lack of sleep, all of it was for this moment…and all his parents wanted was his happiness.

Mari pipes up, “Well…are you dating anyone?  
“No, but… I’ve been too busy to even think about it, but…now I’ll be able to bring him home a lot easier when I do decide to start dating a little more openly.”

The parents stand up and step forward and embrace him, happy he was able to tell them something that had bugged him for so long. Yuuri almost felt guilty, not only for keeping them in the dark, but because he was one of the lucky ones who could continue to love their parents the same way they had their entire life.

“So is Victor single?”

“Ah! Mom!”

“I’m not hearing no!”

 

Victor hears both laughter and a bit of Yuuri yelping, unsure exactly what that means. He’ll just have to be patient. It’s been about a half hour since he’d gone in, maybe a little bit longer.

He assumes there are people who know about his own preferences, and they stayed quiet to be safe. Yuri was one of the ones that knew for sure, and he didn’t mind it; back at the banquet, he could have taunted and teased for the entire time Victor pined after his Japanese delicacy, and yet he was one of the only people who never held it against him. He’s never outed him. Perhaps the feelings of familial connection were mutual, maybe there was respect yet to be had.

His thoughts are interrupted when the door opens, eager to see how the room would look, he can see Yuuri with a big smile, rubbing his eyes under the blue rimmed glasses. The relief that rushed over him was almost so heavy of a load lifted, Victor felt like he could float away.

Hiroko walks out with him, barely noticing him there, “Now, I think you’ve deserved some Katsudon, I won’t tell victor if you won’t.”

Victor chortles, “Victor knows! But my little piggy has to win an actual award!” He winks, crossing his arms.

Yuuri giggles between their interactions, he receives a pat on his back from his coach, “Feeling better?”

The pupil nods, “I’d feel even better with a pork cutlet bowl.”

“Yuuri! Using it against me, how dare you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so short, but I've been posting another chapter! I'm actually working on it at this very moment!


	19. So this is love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The slow burn is finally turning into a bright flame, Yuuri and Victor are developing in ways they've never expected before. Meanwhile, Chris and Phichit still are the best wingmen of this day in age.

Victor knocks on his student’s door, humming and waiting, Yuuri opens up with his phone to his ear, gesturing him to come in. At this hour, he must be talking to Phichit, and as soon as he hears him talk, he knows it must be him. “Yes! Everything went well! Dad’s asking about my type, weirdly enough, I think he wants to set me up.”

Entering, he sits on the edge of the bed, wait for him to finish. “Yeah, mom did mention that…yeah…Hi Chris! I don’t know if you can hear me on the laptop there!” He laughs a bit into the speaker, “I’ll have to get out of here though, I’ll talk to you tomorrow maybe. Goodnight, guys!”

Yuuri sighs, throwing his phone on his bed, rubbing his eyes, needing to get himself some rest after a full day of excitement. “You look exhausted, Yuuri.”

“I’m alright, it’s just been a big day, in a good way though! For once, I’m more excited rather than terrified for what’s to come.” His chuckle is happy, how Victor loved when his laughter was more than a nervous coping mechanism, it was far too long since he’d heard it last.

“Well,” He replied, “I have something to show you, I need you to come with me.”

Yuuri didn’t want to go too far, he really was sleepy, but he’s more than happy to follow his beloved coach if he was being called upon. “Alright, where are we going?”

“Just to my room, it’ll only take a moment!” Victor grabs his wrist to pull him along, though the student is barely surprised, this has become his mode of transportation through the springs. Soon, the pair make it to the guest room, and Victor closes the door behind them, where he proudly presents the Yuuri poster. “Ta da!” He straightens a corner that’s been bent from the sliding door, but he looks excited.

Yuuri blinks as he looks up to see his picture on the back of his coach’s door, sitting on the side of the bed, he was quite sure it would be something else, like the cute poodle that liked to jump between their rooms per night. Honestly, he’s never seen a poster of himself except for the one his parents made to advertise the pork cutlet bowl in Hasetsu. “...W…Wow, I didn’t realize you could find one of me, let alone want to put it in your room!” He hugs his knees to his chest.

“I saw it, I fell in love, and I had to have it!” He states, “I know you have a million of me, but let’s be honest, who doesn’t?” Victor even strikes a pose, flipping his silver bangs and popping his hip out. “But it’s only fair for your biggest fan to have one, yes?”

There’s no answer, Victor assumes either absolutely smitten and about to confess his undying devotion to win gold medals for him forever, or he’s mesmerized by the Nikiforov Ass ™. When he turns to look, he’s in pure and utter pain from the beautiful sight of that sweet man dozed off, holding his arms together to his knees as he rests. “…. Oh my god.” He beams and walks over, “Yuuri…” He whispers, putting his hand on the crown of his head.

“Hm….”

“Do you want me to take you to your room?” He asks quietly, already scooping him up from the cushy bed, but it results in the cutest protesting whine he thinks he’s ever heard. “…. did you want to sleep here? I won’t mind, I know you get cold easy.”

Yuuri nods gently, his face presses against Victor’s shirt for just a moment. Coach Victor smiles, he uses his knee to push the blankets aside, setting his dear friend down, _“Well, when he’s sleepy, he’s a lot less embarrassed for me to hold him…. or perhaps he’s getting used to it.”_ Victor takes the glasses off his face, and sets it on the nightstand.

Victor climbs in on the other side, deciding to sleep with pants will be more respectable for this shy puppy, and he gently nestles his bare chest against Yuuri’s clothed back. _“Goodness…he’s so cold! How on earth? It’s summer! I must be sure to keep him toasty!”_ Gladly, he wraps his arms around him, one goes under his pillow, and the other around his chest as he pulls him in for the best body heat sharing he can muster.

Still barely awake, Yuuri doesn’t have the energy to be bashful, instead, he rests against the Russian and closes his eyes.

 

There is no phone alarm this morning, both of their cells were absolutely dead, having been neglected of their chargers by accident. The warmth of summer sun beamed down to the two grown men, shifted and spread out on the futon with the curly haired puppy dog that laid on their legs. Victor yawns gently, laying on his stomach, his forehead is pressed against Yuuri’s as they somehow share the same pillow despite two others available.

As he shifts, Yuuri groans, he was having such a nice sleep before all this movement began, he could feel Victor’s legs untangle from his own, _“Oh yeah…. I slept in his bed last night…”_ He feels around for his glasses, at least he could somewhat make out where the nightstand was.

Victor opens his eyes reluctantly, almost familiar with the desire to stay where he was all day. That is until he hears the rustling of the blankets as Yuuri stirs, now he can’t wait to see him; it will either be a shy bashful Yuuri, or a sleepy mini-freak-out that they had cuddled most of the night.

Propping his upper half up on his elbows, he looks to the side, trying to look as graceful as he could this early (or late, who knows what time it is). “Good morning, my little piggy~” Yet he could not be prepared for the view at his side, the bundled up Katsudon with bedhead is so close as he rubs his big brown eyes sleepily, then puts on his glasses. _“Oh my god, my heart!”_

“Hey Victor, sorry if I kept you up all night…” He yawns and stretches his legs, looking up at him. The way this handsome man gazed down at him gives him an unexpected realization he wasn’t prepared for in the slightest. He’s one of the few people in the world who got to sleep with Victor. He blushes furiously, he shouldn’t be having these thoughts, how disrespectful of him. The heat of his face even radiates to the pillow he’s pressing his cheek on to hide.

After all these months here, away from home, he aches to finish exactly what he knows is bound to happen, he wants it now.  It's a good time to finally say something.  After all, he'd helped Yuuri come out to his family, he'd organized a skate with him based on pure love, and sexual love, Victor has endearingly implanted into this pupil's life, but he was missing one last thing....  “Yuuri.” Victor sighs, he’s not one to be nervous easy, but the view of this man in the morning just throws him into the open water. Yuuri pries his eyes back open to look up at his idol, who pulls the blanket down from his chin and scoots a little closer. “…Would you at all…. mind…. if I kissed you?”

Of all the things that could stop Yuuri’s heart, this one felt like screeching brakes that stopped his breathing, his thought, but not the butterflies in his stomach. Surely he must be dreaming, this is the start of some wet dream that isn’t like the usual ones he’s had involving Victor, it’s been brought on in result to sleeping beside his childhood/adulthood crush. “I…. I….” He peeps, stammering and trying to take some sort of breath inward, “S-Sure!” He squeaks, before he can even help it, this was definitely a dream, it had to be.

Victor didn’t expect the rush of emotions that was flooding into him when he hears him quietly agree, he eagerly presses his hand to Yuuri’s cheek, his silver hairs drop to brush against that face beneath him. There’s no hesitation to the gentle fleeting touch the Russian places delicately onto Yuuri’s lips, his breath blankets around the kiss, a sigh of pure delight, what he had waited for months to feel was more incredible than he could ever imagine.

This is not a dream, those are definitely Victor’s lips that seem to fit against and between his perfectly, there was no doubt in his mind. He’s tensed, he’s shaking, he doesn’t know how to move his lips, should he tilt his head? In an attempt to do something, maybe try to kiss back; his lips part, giving a gentle nibble at Victor’s with hesitation, and he gets somewhat lost when the gesture’s returned. The two feel like their mouths will never pull away again, the only thing they can do is let their bodies press against each other, the Russian feels hands that he didn’t know were wrapped around him gently run down his back as he pulls the Japanese man into the kiss by the back of his neck.

Victor opens his icy blue eyes once more; his breath has been stolen from his lungs as he looks down to his partner; his soft lips already missing the other pair. Yuuri looks out of breath, his breath is shaky, and he opens his own brown eyes to gaze back; he’s nervous, he’s very nervous, he can tell. “Yuuri, are you alr- “

The Katsudon buries his face against the bare chest of his other party, he was trembling, his first kiss, his first real kiss. Silver hair sweeps out from the side of his face as he laughs, hugging him gently as he hides away, “Are you hiding? Was that too much?”

“Th-That…. was my first kiss…” He whimpers, cupping his own hands over his face, “I-I g-got nervous…”

There was better comfort in Victor’s heart knowing he didn’t overstep his boundaries, “If it helps, you fooled me~ You’re doing so well~”

Yuuri looks up, still in disbelief, “A-Are you sure?”

“But you’re so tense, you don’t have to worry so much! You won’t be able to enjoy yourself if you do~” He leans down to him, as he whispers the words, they stroke against his lips again, giving him goosebumps all down his arms. “is it too much for you?” Yuuri’s hands are taken into his. “I can stop~”

“No!” He didn’t mean to sound so urgent, but he wants to go for more, and he gulps, trying not to hide again against Victor.

Makkachin huffs, annoyed of the two men shifting about in the bed, hopping down and going over to the white chair beside the bed.

“Oh?” Do you want more?” He taunts, his words were quiet, sultry, and irresistible, Yuuri wants to taste those words. “You’ll have to come and get it~” He pulls away, sitting up on the bed and winking at the young man.

He was being challenged, to initiate, he wasn’t even good at receiving the kiss, how was that supposed to happen smoothly? Sitting up, he still looks like a tensed up version of himself, still as a statue. Yes, he would love to be suave and to sweep the other kisser off his feet. The only thing stopping him from being a dashing prince, equipped with romantic acts…is the fact that he’s Yuuri Katsuki, equipped with anxiety.

Victor can see the conflicting fear with the desire to do this just right, and he holds his hand up, stroking some hair out of his chocolate eyes. “Aren’t you so cute?” Yuuri gulps, getting a determined look on his face as he gets on his knees, throwing his arms around the other and pressing his lips back onto his, almost too harshly. The coach is surprised as he falls back onto the mattress, Yuuri on top, they break apart from the collision, and immediately, the pupil breaks into an uncontrollable cackle with his face in the crook of his bare neck, bouncing from Victor’s reciprocated reaction as he booms in the bedroom.

“I-I’m sorry! I tried, I tried not to mess it up!” He wheezes, trying to breathe in this mess of blankets.

“It’s okay! I’m just glad you said yes~”

Somewhere in the tangle of sheets, as they began to calm down, his little piggy has somehow taken hold of his hand, it must have happened in the fit of giggling. “…. I-Is this alright, Victor?”

He kisses his forehead with a soft peck, “Yes, everything is wonderful, Yuuri~”

“O-Okay, good.” He responds, shrinking back into his own shoulders like a nervous turtle, shifting to lay against each other, he’s smiling and tries to hide the giddy lip biting as he thinks endearingly on the past few minutes that seemed like forever, but Victor has a matching one and he’s not afraid to show it. “…Are we training today?”

“Nah, it’s a national holiday, didn’t you hear?”

“…What?”

“It’s ‘I got kissed by a cute boy’ day, we’re celebrating.” The coach nuzzles his nose against the black haired head that is against his shoulder.

Yuuri is back to being a bumbling and blushing fool, covering his face with his hands, Victor giggles away in joy that his little holiday pick up line worked so well.

 

 

Victor is out walking Makkachin, Yuuri went to shower up after the two spent most of the morning laying there and talking about little things. He’d charged his phone up enough to make a facetime phone call while he was out, he needed to talk to his best friend. Scrolling through his phone, he doesn’t even look at the time he’s calling, knowing from Japan it’s about an eight-hour difference; instead he rings anyway.

It takes a while, as he expects, but there’s soon a click, a shuffle, and an animalistic growl from the speaker and a pure black screen. “CHRIS! GOOD TO HEAR YOUR VOICE!”

“Victor…..It is four in the fucking morning, your ass better be on fire or drunk and on fire at the same time.” The light from Japan’s side of the phone lights up his face just barely, and boy does he look angry and tired.

He laughs to the response, “Come now, it can’t be like when we were teenagers, we have to get special visas to enter Budapest again.”

Christophe sits up in bed, causing his cat to mewl in case it’s food time, he shakes his head. “What’s up? Why are you calling at this hour?” He turns on his light and rubs his eyes, peering into the phone screen as best he can without blinding himself terribly.

Victor looks aglow, a smile permanently plastered on that sharp jawline, he’s laughing still, “It happened, Chris.”

There’s a silence as he stares into the phone, “….The Grand Prix Final is like six months away last I checked, you two haven’t done anything. Unless I hibernated without knowing it. And I’m sure that didn’t happen, because I’m awake and angry and the cat’s all pissy now.”

“No!” He chortles, the bright sun lit his face up, “What’s the other reason I came to Japan, Christophe? Think hard, you’ve got a big brain, you can do it!”

His face looks befuddled for a moment and then he rubs his face, “…..Did you call me at an ungodly hour to tell me you tapped Japanese ass?”

“I didn’t tap anything, Chris, not everything’s about sex!” Christophe can recognize the background where Victor strolls, seeing the beach and skies, “We kissed, not just on the forehead this time….we kissed, for what felt like hours!”

His friend can’t help but laugh now, staring at him, “Oh, Victor, you’ve got it terribly, you’re a lovesick puppy.”

“Love is too soon to say at all, but what I’ve got is….fantastic~….” He hoots.

“So when’s your first date?” Victor airs at the screen, blinking at him. “….You’re not just going to kiss him and let him assume you’re together, right? What if he doesn’t know what your intentions are?”

The determination in his face grows solid as a rock, “A DATE, YES, THAT’S SOMETHING I NEED TO DO….Should….Should I ask his parents for permission?”

“It’s not his hand in marriage, Victor, something simple yet elegant. After all, if you make a fuss, then the media will hear about it.” Christophe opens up his laptop, propping the phone up against a pillow nearby. “Speaking of which, what are your terms going to be for that? Straight people won’t like it. Especially the ones who judge our competitions and write our articles.”

That’s something Victor has thought about his whole life, what it would be like to be in an open relationship, where his fans would be jealous but praise his lover for being the lucky one to be with him. “Well…I want to talk with Yuuri before I make any decision about that, but not tonight, I’m going to show him I care! How should I do it? Should I buy him roses? Or…what are the nice flowers they have here? Should I buy him a cherry tree?”

“Yes, nothing says, ‘I’ve been in love with you since you got drunk and naked,’ like a tree.” Christophe snickers, “although I would have to say, maybe something cute and small, an inside joke between you to lighten the mood, make it easy to say yes.”

Victor groans, looking to his screen and pouting, “How did you ask Phichit out?” As he questions, the Swiss man’s face gets a smirk on his face.

“I did it wasted off my ass, on accident. You don’t need to know the story.”

“YES I DO, TELL ME! You never get drunk!” Victor laughs and sits down on the rocks at the beach, “Come on, I’ll tell you everything if you tell me everything. I’ll even get you pictures!”

Christophe groans, “Fine, but only because Phichit will want to know the details later, he’ll kill me if I don’t get them all right away. I went to a bar and some fans of mine bought me a lot of shots.” Victor looks like he’s preying on the details, smirking that curly grin he likes to do. “I was skyping with the dear later, he was cackling his ass off, because I started singing. You know the song I hate?”

Victor was already keeled over, nearly dropping his phone, “No, not that song.”

“Yes, that song, and I changed the words.”

“Sing it, sing it now. I have to hear it!”

Christophe groans and rubs his eyes, trying to remember. “….Hey, I just met you….” He mumbles quietly, “….and this is crazy….I’ll eat your asshole….go out with me maybe.”

 

Makkachin ran away at the sound of the laughter the Russian man had as he drops his phone into the sand, and flops back onto it, his sides hurting, his throat hurting, even his eyes hurting from how he was weeping with humor. The sound of a protesting Christophe is stifled in the grains; even the fisherman who stood above the pier about a mile down worriedly looked over.

“THIS MAN….WILLINGLY STARTED DATING YOU…AFTER YOU DID THAT…”

“Vitya, you must remember, I’m Christophe Giacometti; if I can’t do it, nobody has any hope left. Although Phichit might get mad at me if you do the same thing, really.” Victor calms down his laughter and he sits up, clapping his hands and gesturing the poodle to come over.

“Right…Right, what should I do?”

Christophe shrugs in the camera, leaning back on his pillows. “That’s up to you, I think something little and sentimental might be better for you. Perhaps you should cook for him and him alone. Or take him out to a restaurant, go for a picnic.”

“PICNIC! HAH! THAT WORKS PERFECTLY!” He shouts at his friend, “You! It’s four in the morning, what are you doing awake? You get some rest, okay? I’ll take it from here!”

 

Yuuri finishes up his shower, drying his hair and looking in the closet, particularly thinking of if he can dress nice somehow. He doesn’t have very many formal shirts except for the white one that he wore his blue tie with sometimes, that’s been with every press conference and banquet he’d ever been to. Honestly he’s sure he needs to be refitted, yet they’re expensive, it’s quite difficult to want to go get a new suit, or go shopping in general when you do it by yourself.

He grumps and picks up his phone, plugged into the wall, he needed to talk to Phichit, perhaps it was something in the air between the blossoming feelings of the two who had spent the night together, but talking with a best friend sounded like the best idea. Phichit was in Thailand training, and there’s about a two hour-ish difference, he knows it by memory from all the texts they’ve been sending recently.

Needing advice on outfits, he’ll have to facetime him, looks like he’s on the same brainwave as the Russian coach, for he presses the button and awaits to see if Phichit answers. Luckily, the face pops up on the screen, “Yuuri! Hey!....Wow, sleeping in?” He mentions at the sight of wet haired and bathrobed bestie, “I’d expect you to be working on your jumps right about now, not showering.”

Yuuri chuckles a little, “We’re skipping training today, I have something to tell you.”

The screen is filled with Phichit’s face, up close and personal with that camera, “You’re pregnant. I knew it, how could you? I thought what we had was special!”

The chortle from his friend was exactly what he needed to hear, “No! Hey! I’m serious….Victor and I…kinda spent the night together….I fell asleep with him after I hung up with you and…well….”

Contorting his face, the acquainted pterodactyl screech is heard over the speaker and finally has an expression to go with it, Yuuri might lose his shit if he keeps staring. “YUUUUURRRIIIIIII!”

“I’m not done! Come on! I need you to let me tell you!”

“There’s MORE? Oh my god, I’m going to die, this is fantastic. GO ON, GO MY GAY CHILD.”

“I’m older than you, Phichit,” He puckers, then shakes his head, “ANYWAY! When we woke up this morning…well….we spent about an hour or so kissing,”

The thai skater is dancing in place, the phone screen blurring immediately, “YUUUUUUURRRRIIIIIII! Was it on the mouth? Of course it was on the mouth! I’m so proud of you, way to get that.”

The appearance on Yuuri’s face was serene and happy, he was blushing very bright, “It was amazing, I didn’t realize he liked me…but now I don’t know what to do next! I’m even trying to figure out if I should wear something different! I don’t have any nice clothes!”

“Are you going on a date? Did he ask you out too?” It looks like Phichit is in one of the private rinks where he’s training with Coach Celestino, which he’s lucky for, considering there’s a yelling young man talking about his romantic lifestyle.

“Well….I was going to ask him out actually, but….I don’t know how….” He pulls the phone over to his closet, “I don’t know what I could wear to do it! All I have are my fat clothes and my press conference suit.”

There’s a thoughtful hum, “….You know, it’s really unfortunate that I’m not one of those stereotype gays who can help you pick out the best outfit and send you off on a romcom journey; if you weren’t with your family, I’d tell you to wear that lace bodysuit from the club…Ooh, how about the Eros costume?”

“Gah! I’m not trying to seduce him!” He peeps, pulling out a few different shirts to look at them. “At least not yet! I’m looking for a first date! Should I go out and buy an outfit? I don’t know!”

“If you do, you look really good in green!” Phichit touches on, “It goes with your brown eyes! Maybe comb your hair back like you do in your performances!” He peers into the screen, “…Hey, what’s that shirt in there? The light one?”

Yuuri looks in the back of the closet, a shirt from when he was in high school. “Eh? I can’t believe I still have that.” It was a white shirt with thin black stripes, he never wore it because of the rumors it would make him feel like he looked fatter. “…Yeah, this could work! Phichit, thanks for your help, wish me luck!”

"Good luck! I want details later!" He calls back, the phone hangs up, and Yuuri can feel a swell in his chest as he dances in place, looking over his outfit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
> 
>  
> 
> So this got very sloppy and I had to use my reference for a first kiss for any of this to really happen. I really hope you guys like it, I'm sorry if it's not as good as the beginning! I'm trying my best!


	20. Shall we Date?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor has been planning this date in his mind over and over again for the past hours since that first kiss, and Yuuri wants to ask him out first. With the help of their best friends, they decide to plan a romantic date, each in their own little minds to be able to show the other how much they care.

Victor carries in some bags of groceries, nodding to Hiroko as he passes her, “Hello! Hello! I’m going to need to use the kitchen for a little bit, would you at all mind?” His signature heart smile beams as he continues in anyway.

“Victor?” She chuckles, “What are you cooking up tonight? I was planning on duck, but I can put everything away if you’d prefer this.”

“Oh!” He shakes his head graciously, “No, Yuuri and I are going on a special trip today, and I’ll be making a picnic for it. I just need to be in here to pack up what I bought, I kind of had to drive out somewhere to get some of it.”

Hiroko has a look on her face, it was confused at first, but then it grew warmer within a moment, “Did you want to make a bento box? It’ll make your food much easier to store, I’ll teach you how to make them pretty.”

An excited expression fills every inch of Victor, he nods quickly, “Yes! That would be wonderful!”

“Great! What do you have?”

Pulling out some paper bags, “I have cucumbers, tomatoes, I got some bread as well. Never underestimate how much cheese and bread one can have at a picnic, spoiler alert, there’s no such thing as too much.” He chuckles, then he pulls out some oranges and strawberries. “And some fruit to go with it. I hope he likes it.”

She peeks in to also see a bottle of wine, mommy senses are definitely tingling, and she’s got a giddy feeling bubbling in her short self as she turns to get the bento boxes out of the cabinet. “That doesn’t sound like a picnic box from around here, did you just have a craving for them?”

“Well….” He starts cutting some of the cucumbers up for bite pieces, “As much as I’ve come to love the foods I’ve eaten here, and there’s quite a variety, I miss little things about back in St. Petersburg. Picnics are very common in Russia, and I’ve missed the little things quite a bit; though the seagulls cries help me remember that it’s only a plane trip away if I need to be there.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re bringing your home into ours!” She says, “Even teaching me some Russian, I bet I know more than Yuuri does right now!”

Victor laughs, looking over to her and shrugging, “But I know more Japanese than my rink mates, so I suppose that’s a win-win!”

Together, they put together the bento boxes, in the most decorative way possible with the foods that were purchased for today. She teaches him how to make little faces out of the foods, and he gives her a slice of some Circassian cheese, a Russian soft cheese, to which she finds she’s very fond of on bread.

She helps him put some little desserts in one of the boxes to keep it fresh, telling him how they’ll go well with the plum wine he’s gotten for the occasion.

 

Yuuri hears the kitchen bustling, and the Russian language going back and forth between his mother and Victor; now was his chance to recruit Mari into his shenanigans. He rushes over to her room, ducking the kitchen with a quiet stealth he wasn’t used to really having with his chubbier figure creaking across the floor. Soon, he makes it over to her room, and he knocks quietly, “Mari? Maaaarrriiiiii? I need some help!”

There’s some creaking on the other side of her door before it swings open, her band posters all over, and her headset resting on her neck. “…Yuuri, are you wearing cologne?”

“I need your help!” He whispers, stepping into her room and closing the door, something he doesn’t normally do, yet he needs to make sure he’s unseen. While she protests, grumbling at her invaded personal space. “I’m sorry, I just can’t let Victor see me! I really need your help.”

“….What, did you get in trouble? You slept in til like noon today. He’s your coach, he’ll be fine regardless.”

“I’m asking him on a date.”

She looks a little surprised, she expected Victor to be the one to do it first, in fact, Yuuri never really took the first initiative in a lot of things in his life. “…What, and you need my help? He might take it the wrong way if I’m helping you somehow in it.”

“I’m taking him to the beach, I want to set up a place under the dock to be romantic and nice and I just need some help to do it!

“Yuuri, I’m surprised.” She sits on her desk chair, “Romantic? You’re not usually like this.”

“I-I just know I want to be suave and I have a plan, but I need to be able to pull through on it, and…it’ll be suspicious if it’s just me leaving to set it up.”

She sighs and rolls her eyes, “Okay, come on, let’s go get it taken care of. Are you wearing that on your date?” She points to his sweats, only to receive a frantic head shake, “Good, comb your hair back too.”

What was with everyone telling him to do that? Maybe he just should do it in general, though he’s always more comfortable with his hair down, even if it looks messy.

 

Victor has the boxes packed up and set aside in the kitchen, and he’s off to go get himself ready, though it won’t be hard to do, he’s an attractive person and he knows it. He’s put on a navy shirt and a tan cardigan, humming as he combs out his hair and puts on his watch. “He won’t suspect it, the poor thing, I’ll look so damn good~” Though he had to figure out how to set up the picnic blanket on that hill where they could look over the town, he hadn’t actually been up there before, but he assumed this would be alright. It was after 5 now, perfect, the cute little piggy of his hasn’t been around today it seems, perhaps it was errand day for the spring.

Though his thoughts were interrupted by the knock on his door, “Yes?” He calls, fixing his chinos on and looking in the mirror, “I’m decent!” _“Bullshit, I’m perfection.”_

“V-Victor!” He hears, that familiar nervous voice, “I need your help!”

Help? That makes the Russian nervous, he rushes over to the door and slides it open, looking down to see his Yuuri, and he’s done up real nice. The cute 23 year old man is standing before him with a striped shirt and sleek black pants, his hair combed back, his blue glasses resting on his nose, and holding a matching blue hydrangea blossom in his hands, yet the flower trembles. “……You look ravishing~ What may I ask is the occasion?” Victor prods; one might see hearts popping around him as he looks at how he’s dressed up.

Yuuri gets lost a moment, noticing how well his other party is dressed, his hair is framing his high cheekbones just right, and he silently admires for just a moment to realize he came for a reason. “V-Victor. I-I’ve come to ask you to accompany me! T-To…uh…. a date!”  
“Oh my! Zamechatel'no!” He claps his hands together with pure joy, “Yuuri, I would love to!” Victor’s long arms pull him into a hug immediately, resulting in the short one being a blushing katsudon again.

He mumbles for a moment before clearing his throat and pulling back, “I-If you’ll come with me, I-I think we can go before my mother makes that duck dish, she’ll save us some if we don’t get something to eat on the way.”

“Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise!”

How endearing, Victor’s eyes just light up at the thought of this cute date Yuuri must have set up, and he thinks about how wonderful it would be. “I’ve got a surprise for you too~”

The brown eyes look up, eyebrows quirking at the inquired surprise, “What is it?”

Victor takes his wallet and the leash for Makkachin, gesturing Yuuri to follow him as he closes his door and leaves down the hallway towards the relaxing front room. The Japanese man shuffles after him, it’s hard not to be excited of such an accepting date that is literally so happy, he skips down the hallway with absolute vigor.

 _“What on earth could he have for me?”_ He asks himself, still holding onto the little flower as they venture off into the front area, and he notices a basket tied with a thin blanket, it’s a large basket, so it must have something big in there. “Is that a picnic basket?”

“Exactly!” He chuckles, turning around to face him, “Yuuri, you must have gotten to me before I could get to you, yet I think we can make our plans work together…. why don’t we have our picnic dinner at that place you were telling me about? Maybe we’ll recite this morning~”

Three things come to Yuuri’s mind; THE Victor Nikiforov was going to ask HIM out, the same Nikiforov has put together a picnic dinner for them, and last but not least, he can’t wait to kiss him again. And for once he’s not scared from it, he’s absolutely thrilled. “R-Right! It’s walking distance, I can take Makkachin if you want to take the basket.”

“Sounds like a deal!”

 

There’s a short walk to the beach, though it’s not normally the place where they walk, it’s not right alongside the water where they usually go. Victor’s curious and excited to see where they were going, Makkachin sniffs everything along the way, and in away, his owner wants to as well with curiosity. “I have to say, you’re unusually adventurous today~ Were my kisses a bad influence on you~?”

Yuuri has to laugh a little at that, “Not at all, they just…lit a fire under my feet is all.” He rubs the back of his head, they’re approaching the boardwalk, empty from festivities about a week before. “Just uh…. promise me you won’t laugh at me, okay?”

It’s now when he notices there’s a slew of blankets, hanging like a large tent from the boardwalk posts, it’s open enough to see the ocean as the day is ending; within those hanging walls was one big blanket and some cushions from the front room and from Yuuri’s room to rest on. “….Yuuuuuuurrriiiii!” He smiles, rushing over.

“It’s not too much…is it?” He asks, going over to a few lanterns with small battery candles inside, turning on their little switches. “I just thought it’d be something nice, and I know I’m not the best with words….So why not be better with scenery?”

Victor sets the basket down and looks around, “Well, you certainly did it! Come on then, let’s sit down, I have my own little surprises here!” He sets the basket down and plops down onto the cushy comforter placed delicately in the half tent. Yuuri can feel bubbling excitement well up within him, seeing Victor like this scenery was just more confidence, and it gave him the energy to sit right up next to him to look what was in the basket. “First!” He pulls out the bottle, “I’ve got plum wine! A little birdie told me it was his favorite wine once~” Thanks for that, dad, always looking out for his drunk ass. “Then I have some artesian bread, a cucumber tomato salad, come of my favorite Russian cheese, called Circassian~”

“Oh my goodness, this is a lot of food….”

“Then some fruit~. I also got some cakes from your mother, she said you liked the little raspberry ones~” He smiles, pulling out some wine glasses, “Have I ever told you that us Russians love picnics? I’m an expert picnic packer!”

Watches as Victor pours each glass daintily to an elegant halfway line in the glass, handing him one, “I can’t say you’ve ever said much about what it’s like back home, do you miss it?”

“Quite often, yes.” He answers, “I miss my rink, my friends, my apartment, there’s a lot of things you miss when you call it home. Try the cucumber tomato salad, it’s one of my favorite things to make, and it goes well with the bread!” Yuuri can hear the tone in his voice as he turns the conversation away from missing home, perhaps to cushion his student from the feeling of guilt. To make him comfortable, he takes a bite with the bread, and he’s stunned.

“…..Ohmgh..” He mumbles with his mouth full, there was a garlic ginger flavor, must be the vinagrette, and it soaked well into the crispy bread. He’s sure he could live on this for a full week with no complaints, he may just have to. As soon as he gets some room in his mouth, he looks up, “Is this a Russian dish?”

Chuckling, he shakes his head, “No, this is something I learned to make on the road, and turned out to be my favorite dish to cook. When I was in Italy for the grand prix at 19, I missed working in the kitchen instead of going to restaurants where they would do it for me, and I picked some things up at a store and this was the result.”

“So you really like cooking then, I love it too!” He smiles, “You seem to get creative when you’re really homesick.”

A chuckle sits in his glass of wine as he sips it, “Oh yes! Though that’s not my most creative I’ve been, did I ever tell you when Chris and I got drunk and tried making pizza out of a hotel microwave?” Yuuri can’t help but giggle, shaking his head, “Well, it all began with…”

The gold of the sunlight mixed with the pink cotton clouds that lit most of the conversations they switched between, slowly nibbling on the delicious treats as it grew dark around the blankets. Their little area is filled with the orange of the lanterns, and as Victor leans his head onto Yuuri’s lap, talking about the upcoming Barcelona sights they should see, he can’t help but feel his entire world slow down. The shadows that danced on his date’s face were beautiful, even in the dimmest of light, and he was amazed how a person could look so incredible in any way he could imagine. His palm strokes away the silver hair from his blue eyes, “Yuuri? You’re staring again!” He chuckles, eliciting a blush.

“Oh! I’m sorry, heh…. I just got a little distracted is all…” Victor takes his hand with his fingers, then leans his cheek into his palm endearingly, making the rest of him gently bounce with a giggle. “I’m glad you liked the blankets and all, I’m glad I had so many extra. Though I’ll have to recruit Mari again to put them all back in the car.”

Victor sits up a little, stretching, “Who says we’re ending this now?”

Brown eyes shifting around at the blankets around them, he clears his throat, “OH, well…. Dinner’s done.”

The silver haired fox gets close, leaning his head against his pupil’s shoulder and gazing up, “I suppose I just want to be alone with you a little longer~” There’s a gentle peck near his ear, and Yuuri gulps a little, his nerves coming right back. “……You’re scared, Yuuri. If you’d like, I can stop.”

He seems to always give the option to stop, and as Yuuri is thankful for that, at the same time, he worries that he’s being a prude. “I am scared…” He acknowledges, “I’m just…trying to get used to someone liking me like this; I’ve never been in a relationship, let alone had someone who wanted to kiss me.”

Victor hears the word ‘relationship’ and smiles a little, he puts his hand to Yuuri’s chin, “You always seem to feel like you don’t have fans, people who adore you, teenagers who look up to you the same way you’ve looked at me!” He chuckles, “You’ve been on podiums and championships before, you’ve won medals and cups and you have merchandise people sell…. Yet you don’t know people adore you.” Yuuri looks embarrassed, looking down to his glass of wine with red cheeks again, “But that’s not a bad thing; if you need me to stop any of this, if you can’t handle what feelings are happening today, I understand. I am happy just having been able to kiss you once…”

Looking up, a little surprised, he gulps again, seeing how stern Victor is about this, “…I want it, I truly do. But you have to understand, Victor…I can think logically about it. I obviously have people who love me, otherwise I wouldn’t be where I am today…but the rest of me doesn’t want to believe that.”

Uncomfortable, not exactly knowing how this really feels, he has an expression that’s unreadable, “…. I’m not sure I follow, is there another way to explain it?”

With a gentle sigh, he sits up and looks around, then sees the wine bottle. “…. Well, imagine there’s a ship in this bottle, an artist has worked his entire life to be able to do things like this.” He holds up the re-corked bottle on its side. “Everyone admires how he did it, the ship is fantastic and delicate, and it’s detailed.”

Victor enjoys this symbolism and nods, looking to the bottle, “Yes! They’re very nice!” Even clapping his hands, as so far he’s getting it.

“But imagine what it’s like being that ship inside that bottle.” The look on his face changes, “To the ship, everyone’s watching it, loving how it’s looking, how pretty it is, and maybe it’s even won awards for being such an artistic ship in a bottle. But…..”

“It’s trapped.” Victor frowns, looking to him, finishing that sentence for him was heartbreaking, “Yuuri, how awful.”

There’s a shrug, “I’ve lived with it a long time, in fact, I’m a lot better than a lot of people who have anxiety like me. Mari’s always there for me, our parents are always very good at making sure I’m taken care of, and eating, and sleeping. I’ve learned how to take care of myself, but sometimes it’s hard. Especially when someone shows that they care about me; I just…..I want to believe you do really like me, it’s hard to figure it out though. And there’s no overnight cure.”

“…Will you let me help you?” That makes him smile, in this whole conversation that dives into unknown territory, that’s the best he could hope for.

Yuuri presses a kiss onto the very tip of the Russian’s nose, “I’ll try my best.” Victor smiles at the little nose kiss and he bursts into a fit of glee.

“Uwah! My Yuuri gave me nose kisses!”

The pupil giggles back and wraps his arms around Victor gratefully, just glad he is where he is right now. The past six months have been pure joy, he’s felt more clear headed for the first time in a while, like the roar of life slowed down, tranquility met him at home and took care of him, it’s helped him heal. _“So, I’m your Yuuri now then?”_

The two lay back, looking as the moon lit up the dark blue of the night sky, and the same way as they woke up this morning, they lay with each other, fingers entangled and whispers close to bare skin of neck and cheek. It takes them a while to realize a few of those battery lights have gone out, “Hm….What time is it, Victor?” He looks up, chin resting against his chest.

Victor pulls his phone out from Makkachin, who is asleep against his side, “Hm…9:37, getting a little bit late. Did you want to pack up and head home?”

“Yeah, that’ll be best. I can drive you home if you want, Mari and I left the car up on the boardwalk so I could pack up after.”

“Nah, I’ll help.” Victor sits up and stretches, “I wish we could stay out here forever, though it’d be pretty uncomfortable to sleep after a while. Plus, to explain to anyone who might find us down here would be a doozy.” He chuckles a little bit.

They start folding up blankets, and carrying them up the rocks over to the parking lot where the van sits, Makkachin hops on up like a pro, watching them do the heavy lifting.

 

Yuuri parks the car in front of the spring, rubbing his eyes already before they even begin to do much of the heavy work. “Whew, what a day, I can’t believe all of it happened….”

“I know, it feels like that first kiss was a week ago.”

Hiroko, Mari, and Toshiya are gathered in one of the rooms upstairs, trying to change a light that’s gone out, and cleaning up the last towels of the visitor who had just left said room. That is until they had seen the headlights sweep across the ceiling, in which case, they all decide to look out. “Oh!” Hiroko squeaks, “Yuuri’s back from his little date! Ooohh, what are they doing? I can’t see!”

“Wait, you knew about the date?”

“Yes! Victor was asking him out today, at least that’s what I gathered from him cooking a big meal for him…Oohh, Mari, can you see?” She turns to the windows of the darkened rooms, trying to see if they can be able to make out what’s happening down at the car.

If there was a disappointed look on anyone’s face, if they were drunk, anything. Mari has binoculars and is whispering to her parents, “They look happy” She mumbles, “They’re just talking right now.”

Victor opens the door, “Hold on, Yuuri!” He says, rushing to the other side to open it for him.

“Eh?” He chuckles a little, stepping out, “Thank you, I can’t say anyone’s ever rushed to do that for me before.” Yuuri opens the back door of the van to get the blankets and cushions. “You think you could get the door for me?”

“Now hold on,” Victor takes his hand, “Before we start doing any heavy lifting, I just…I’ve wanted to do something all night, and I think it’ll be best if you’re not holding anything as I do it.” Yuuri has an idea what this must be.

 

Mari mumbles again, “Victor’s holding his hand.” There’s some hushing and they peer out quietly to see if they can see more.

 

Pulling his date over, Victor puts one hand on Yuuri’s waist, holding the other hand up. “Do you remember how I told you the music is inside you?” He begins to sway with him a little, “You’re just waiting to release it.”

Yuuri is a little surprised, looking up to his dance partner, he laughs a little, “Have you seen yourself? You’re the legendary Victor Nikiforov, and you’re always shocking the world! You’re a lot of the reason I kept skating my whole life.” He has some terribly cheesy things to say in this instance, however, he clears his throat and looks down to his feet.

 

Mari leans over, “They’re slow dancing in the front yard.”

Toshiya looks over to his wife and snickers, “Remember when we used to do that?” Only resulting in a quiet shush and a giggle from his cute wife.

 

 

Victor shakes his head, “I can’t take credit for your performances, but I’ll gladly take credit for being able to make you smile so much tonight. It’s been one of my favorite parts of tonight~”

Usually Victor was corny with this, however, it seems as though it got worse throughout the date, not that his dancing partner minded, he was blushing the whole way regardless. “Well….I could change that.” The coach looks wide eyed, but he raises an eyebrow seductively to him.

“I would love to see that, Yuuri~! But tell me, how do you plan on reaching me all the way up here?” He taunts at him gently, only to see his dance partner with an expression he doesn’t expect. The Japanese man’s biting his lip, he takes his hand back to run his hands back into his own black hair, before taking hold of Victor and swinging him down in a dip.

The silver fox’s eyes grow wide as he’s pulled down, a way he hasn’t done before, only to feel a full on kiss press to his thin lips, astounding. He’s managed to get Yuuri’s confidence up so high, he was able to be the suave prince he’d been aiming for this entire day, all it took was a few hours to muster up the courage.

 

Mari hmphs, “Well…I don’t know what Yuuri just said, but Victor looks like he’s red as a tomato. OH. OH…..”

Hiroko covers her mouth, “What?!”

“That is definitely a kiss, the poor fool dipped his coach, and he’s full on kissing him.” Mari drops the binoculars and turns to her parents, “We’ve got work to do, come on, we don’t need to be watching this.”

Toshiya frowns, “I want to hear about it!”

“Well then ask him later!” Big sister hmphs again, grabbing both of their wrists, “We shouldn’t be spying to begin with! Maybe he doesn’t want us to know yet!”

 

Yuuri’s arms are strong, but they can’t hold this grown man here forever, and he releases the kiss, swinging him back up to a standing position. The both of them take a deep breath, hair disheveled, red in the faces. “….Yuuri~ I’m so proud of you! Channeling your Eros specifically for a kiss, I must be some coach~” He jokes, though he hides his face into his palm bashfully, something Victor never really finds himself in the state of being.

The shorter one smiles a little, still looking somewhat nervous, “What can I say? Maybe there’s a few other things you could teach me.”

Welp, Victor is destroyed, he shudders at the thought of what Yuuri proposes for future dates, “GOODNESS~ I may just have to think of a few things~”

The two gather the blankets and such, carrying Makkachin in on top of them, as he has refused to leave the comfort of the many cushions. Yuuri may be sleeping without a blanket tonight at this point. After returning all the cushions, easing the puppy dog onto Victor’s bed, and throwing the sheets down in the laundry room, the pair walk up from the basement, talking about how the night was.

“So~ Since your blankets are indisposed, why don’t you spend the night with me again? You seemed to sleep so well, and this time we’ll have an alarm for practice.” Victor smiles warmly, “Don’t think just because you’ve won me over, I’ll be taking it easy on you~”

Yuuri gulps and looks away, “So…. this…you do want this to happen again, right? I’m not just needing to pinch myself, you truly believe this is alright?” Those fingers are fiddling, and the nerves have risen up once more to his katsudon, but it was his job to make sure everything was alright.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I? I had a fantastic time, and I want many more dates with you!” He answers, holding his hand out, “That is if you’ll have me.”

Yuuri’s eyes widen at that, he feels honored at this, _“I did…I did a good job on the date and now he wants more? Can I top myself on this?”_ He smiles and takes his hand gently, _"I think if he's there....I could do anything,"_ The student nods to him, “I’ll have you any way you want to be to me, Victor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this took me fOREVER TO WRITE, next chapter is going to get back to the skating that we all know and love, I swear!


	21. The source of my Victory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We look back to Russia, where Yuri Plisetsky is looking back on what his life is, as a young man at 15 already, he's taking care of his grandfather, or at least trying to. He's exhausted and overworked, and the Russian rinkmates he knows are more than happy to help him out.

Russia has been all too busy since Victor left, specifically for Yuri, who has gone through so many changes. He became the number one pupil to Yakov, and has gained an extra coach in ballet who is even tougher than he is, he’s traveled from rink to rink, ballet to ballet, and has lived on what feels like four different airplane lines. Throughout these six months, he’s barely been home, this week is the first time he’s been able to see his grandfather; he’s taking care of him today and has been the past few.

After cooking a quick lunch for him, he stands up to get another beer for him. “So, Yuratchka, this new woman…she’s hard on you, yes?” He asks from his chair, looking to his grandson.

“Yeah, claims if I’m not willing to be ‘reborn’ or some crap, I won’t win gold.” He pouts, his blond hair half tied up. “Old hag makes me move in with her, interrupting my time with you, who does she think she is?”

His grandfather sighs, “I can take care of myself, Yura, I should be taking care of you. You’re fifteen for god’s sake.” Today he seems particularly tired, perhaps his back was hurting him again.

“I know.” Yuri walks over and picks up the empty plate, “I meant I have to keep you out of trouble.” And sets the beer can beside him, glad that his comment had made him bounce with a hearty gruff laughter, “Come on, Grandpa, you’ve gotta be out of jail when the Grand Prix begins, I’m counting on you to be there when I win gold!” Sitting on the small cheap couch covered in blankets, he looks over at his own idol.

“They’ll never catch me, Yura!” He winks jokingly, before a cough bubbles into his throat, he puts a napkin over his bearded mouth and shakes his head. “…You know I hate to do this…but I’m tired.”

Yuri quickly jumps to his feet again, taking the unopened can back to the fridge, “I understand. Do you need help getting to bed?”

“No, no, no,” He grunts and clears hi throat, “I’m going to nap in my chair a bit. Is your coach outside? Yakov?” He nods, “Good…drive safe, Yura, I’ll see you tomorrow…”

Yuri frowns, he takes the cane from beside the door and sets it next to his chair, before he even knows it, the gentle gravely snore of the old man fills the small living room. Quietly, he takes the lunch dishes over to the sink and begins to scrub everything down. _“Grandpa looks like he’s losing sleep…And he’s definitely catching a cold, I know that cough.”_ The least he can do to help when he’s only around at lunchtime is to take care of the house, and he starts putting away the dishes, “I don’t care what the cow says, I’ll come back if he gets too sick.” He sweeps up the floors, even cleans out the fridge of any old food that’s expiring, and he makes sure his grandpa’s pill bottles are out where he can see them.

Yuri cared quite a bit for his grandfather, the one person in this world worth more to him than skating, and all the gold medals in the entire world. He felt guilty for being away so often, so at lunch, Yakov drives him over to take care of the poor old man, who’s scraped by on retirement.

As he locks the door behind him, dropping the heavy trash bag into the metal canister, he hears the car in the driveway start up. Patting his hands on his pants, he walks over and climbs in on the passenger side, “That was fast.”

“He’s tired,” The little punk glares out the window, wishing he was there more often, “I think he’s getting sick, or his back is bothering him…. Either way, he’s not sleeping…”

Yakov sighs, “If you want, I’ll drive you here at dinner as well.”

“I can make the trip myself, I’ll take the bus. I have to go shopping for him anyway, he’s running low on some food.” There’s an approving grunt in response, and the two stay mostly silent on the way back to the rink.

Mila is sitting with Georgi eating some tarts from a bakery nearby, taking a break from skating a little longer now that their coach takes a full half hour trip with Yuri every day to make sure the old crow back home is taken care of. “Oh, hey! Looks like they’re back!” She stands up, patting her hands and fixing her skates, looking out the window, her expression changes. Her little fairy looks even gloomier than usual, like he is close to crying out. “…Georgi, do you have any tarts left?”

He’s about to put the box away when he looks up, “yes, there’s one left.” Noticing her gaze to the window, the container comes out again, “Yuri looks broken, do you think something happened?”

She shakes her head, “Not one thing, he’s been looking exhausted for a while now. Doesn’t really eat much either. He’s not used to this much travel and attention from the coaches, let alone being away from home.” Looking over her shoulder, “He’s not going to want charity,”

“Oh, we’ve done this before.” He chuckles gently.

Yuri walks inside the ice area with a grumble, right before the doors, he sees his rinkmates arguing, just what he needed. “Georgi! Let me have the last one! You ate like ten!”

“I bought them!” He raspberries, “I can eat as many as I want!” He snaps. “Yuri, help us settle the fight, who should get the last tart?” Holding the box with the berry tart inside.

Yuri scowls and reaches in, grabbing the treat, stuffing it in his mouth. “There.” He muffles with a full mouth. “Now neither of you assholes get it.” He whipes his hand on a towel and goes to the side of the rink, taking his skate guards off, then going right onto the ice. “LILIA!” He shouts, making about four people jump, “Are you going to do your job or what?”

The ballet master looks up from her book, unphased at his impatient outburst, slowly, she closes the book and looks him up and down. He looks ragged, he looks angry. “You’re upset, my ballerina.” She states plainly, “I won’t let you on the ice today, do your basic stretches until you calm down.” Her fingers lace together patiently, yet her words set him ablaze.

“Are you telling me that you, a world known fucking ballet instructor, can’t teach someone who is a little fucking upset?”

“I can teach just fine to anyone, but I refuse to teach someone who will endanger themselves on the ice because they’re pissed off.”

Mila shudders, the tension in the rink has thickened into concrete, and the rest of the people around them stop to watch this shouting match, “So you refuse to teach me, fuck it, play the music and I’ll practice without you!”

It was as though the moment he entered the rink, the stress was peeling the wallpaper, the ice could melt by the heat of their words, and the glass could crack of the intensity of Yuri’s stare. Yet Lilia could not be broken as easy into intimidation, she was even more stern than he. “Go home, Yuri. Not even Victor Nikiforov could skate being the way you are today.” And that is what broke him, those green eyes burned like hell’s gates.

“That’s because Victor Nikiforov isn’t ME.” He screeches, his fists are clenched so tight, it stabbed into his palms, the sight of blood even drips out the bottom of one of his hands. He was sick of being compared to the coward that left, he was his own person and yet nobody seemed to know that everywhere he went.

Yakov steps inside, seeing the fear in everyone else’s eyes, and the furious tears that set burning in red stricken eyes. “…Yura, what did you do?” He grumbles, setting the bag down at his side.

“Of course you assume it was me, I’ve been ordered to go home, she refuses to teach me.” His throat growled, though it was choking on his fury. “Take it up with her, I’m going to the market.”

Yuri sits down, violently tearing his own skates away from his feet and throwing them into the bag.

Mila frowns as they watch him take his bag and leave, she rushes over to the benches and starts taking her own off. “Coach, I’m going to make sure he’s okay. I don’t like the thought of him going out like this.”

“Do any of you take my instructions anyway?”

Yet she’s gone, grabbing her team jacket, chasing down the Russian fairy with her backpack and her car keys. “Yuri!” She shouts, waving her hand high above her head, “Wait up! Yuri!”

Yuri is plopped onto a bench before a bus stop, he doesn’t look up for longer than a second before he pulls his hood up, fists tucked into his pockets. She scampers over, “For fuck’s sake, you cow, leave me alone.”

She stops and runs her hand through her red hair, “Yuri, you’re not taking the bus.” She says with a calm voice, but not to demean him.

“Yes I am. Fuck off.” He snarls back to her, turning his head forward.

She crosses her arms and looks down to him, “Do you want to be holding twelve bags of groceries on a public bus, cramped together between two people for an hour as you try to take the trip to your Grandpa’s, only to have to walk the rest of the way?” He is silent a moment, looking down to his phone screen at the time, where it’s definitely a high-volume travel time. And all that stuff she’d just said didn’t count the chance of if his fans were riding in anticipation of upcoming events in the fall.

“Fine.” Yuri stands up, Mila takes his chance to grab one of his wrists where he had dug his nails into his palms, they’re creased with red lines already dried. “Hey! Leave my hands alone!”

“I’ll be carrying your bags, let those cuts close up, okay?” She yanks his bag up from beside him, carrying it with her backpack. “Come on! I’ll show you my pretty car.” She’s relieved that he doesn’t fight her on it, instead, she guides him over to the parking lot for the ice rink, where her cute little purple car she’s had customized for her sits. He grimaces at the color, but is already glad to see how much room there is in the passenger seat. “Now which market do you want to go to?” She opens the back door, throwing the gear in, and then climbs into the driver seat.

“The town square…” He grumbles, getting in and putting on his seatbelt.

Mila drives around the whole afternoon with him, taking him to two markets, where she shows him the best places to get cheeses and takeout. He returns that favor with a middle finger and then telling her the borscht place is closer here than where she normally goes from her apartment. It’s exactly how she wanted it to be, she was worried this little kitten of a teen would be out hurting himself further and getting angry, yet she’s gotten him to the point where he even laughed at her for stepping in gum with her new shoes she just got. It’s something.

She shows him a restaurant with the best soups in town, arguing with him on how much to buy, until she states she’s paying for it anyway, and she’d get some for his grandfather as well.

Finally, Yuuri directs her to his grandpa’s small home, happy he was blessed with another visit in a single day, and as they pull into the driveway, it’s already noticeable how eager he is to get out of the car and take the groceries in with him. He unbuckles and picks up the box with the carryout. “I won’t be long, you can turn the car off if you want, it’s not a bad neighborhood.”

“No, Yuri, I’m dropping you off.” Mila smiles, especially when his expression turns surprised. “I’ll call Yakov, tell him that I’m picking you up in the morning, but you need to be home with your grandfather right now, okay? If he’s still not feeling well tomorrow, I’ll bring you by after we finish skating again.”

Yuri doesn’t know what to do or say, a normal person would hug her, thank her perhaps, maybe even cry, but not him, “…. Don’t forget your soup bowl, you got one too. You get crabby when you don’t get your onion soup.” He takes one of the large cups out of the bag and puts it in her cup holder, as not to spill in her brand-new car.

“I won’t, tiger.” She winks, watching him step out, balance the soup while picking up all the groceries, and doing a struggled shuffle over to the door, all the while, laughing at him. She gets another middle finger, and he makes it up the steps into the house.

“Grandpa!” He calls quietly, in case he’s still asleep after a few hours, “Are you still sleeping?”

“Yura!” She can hear the excitement in their voices, she chuckles a little and closes her window, then pulls out of the drive, heading back towards the city.

It’s a good day when big sister can make little brother feel good, even if they’re not really related.

 

 

Yuko is sweeping near the locker room, beginning her day the same as always, though yesterday she expected to see the coach and student at it again. Strangely, they didn’t come in, even when Victor’s been booking the ice rink, keeping it in business in this ghost town. There was a reassuring sound of the front door opening, and the sound of Victor in coach mode as he tells Yuuri about what the end of his free skate will look like. “Ah! There they are, after yesterday I had thought they disappeared for a while for some training.” She tells her husband, who gets his keys out to the back office.

Takeshi shrugs, “Nah, they probably needed a day to celebrate, or have personal time. They spend all their waking time together after all.” He goes into the office and down the hallway to the front desk to sign out some equipment out for the pair to use. Though Yuuri and Victor brought their own skates and blade guards; he still had to sign them out for lockers and use of the music speakers.

Stepping into the back, he gets the clipboard off the wall for the locker keys and he looks out of the corner of his eye to see….Victor kissing Yuuri’s cheek? Turning to them, the pair are now evenly spaced apart, both with certain smiles on their face that don’t quite seem so innocent. “….Good morning, you two.”

“Hello!” Victor greets, “How are you, Mr.Nishigori?”

He sets the keys and the clipboard down with a pen, not used to the two looking so chipper this early in the morning, “Fine, how about you two?”

Yuuri is beaming, even stretching his arms in place, like he’s eager to get out there. “Great!” He shorter one peeps, “Are the girls here? I got some shells from the beach for them yesterday, they haven’t gone to school yet, have they?”

“Yeah, they’re on the ice, go ahead and say hi if you want to.” Takeshi knew Yuuri was closer with the three little fans, yet his excitement was warily received. Victor signs the clipboard, and takes the keys, picking up his back. “You two seem different today.” Takeshi comments as his friend leaves.

Victor doesn’t look nervous, but he does continue with his smile that’s less than innocent, “Oh? Maybe we’re just happy after a break! I think he needed it.”

He couldn’t deny that was a very good explanation to the two being so chummy, probably had a relaxing day somewhere. The coach walks into the rink to see the kids with the shells that were collected for them.

Yuko walks in, humming, only to see her husband staring at the rink doors as the pair disappeared behind them. “…Everything okay, sweetie?”

“I’m…. I’m not sure.” He scratches his head, “I think it is, but…. I thought I saw something, maybe I’m mistaken.”

 

Victor and Yuuri get right down to business as soon as the triplets left, and the Japanese man could understand what he meant when he said, “I won’t go easy on you, I’m still your coach.” Because he could feel his legs burning from how many stretches he was doing on the ice.

Yet he was more determined than ever to be the best skater he can be, the first competition was just two months away, and he’s certain the practice is going to get more hardcore than it has been. Though with someone by his side, he’s more excited than anything.

“Yuri!” Victor calls, “You look stiff, you need more stretching before we get into those jumps. Let me see your spread eagle!”

“Right!” Yuuri nods, picking up some speed on his blades as he goes for it.

The coach smiles, he has been thinking quite hard on the glory that the world will get to see, the victory that he could see sitting in the brown eyes of this dear man. Yet he’s selfishly taken it for the past few months, savoring it; yes, he’s had his own victory and glory, yet it’s never been this beautiful before. Imagine that he’d come here months ago knowing he would be a coach, yet…he never expected to feel victory through him before any medals would have ever been won.


	22. Developed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting back to the ice, the two are definitely feeling the heat of competition rising in the distance, and are willing to do anything to be ready and prepare for that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because editing is going to be much neater, this is a very short chapter, and there's another one popping up soon!

“Yes!” Victor whoops, applauding Yuuri’s jump he had landed nearly perfectly, more excited than the performer himself. “Good form! Maybe I’ll teach you to do it with your arms up for more points!” yet his student remains focused on the next step sequence, dancing his feet beneath himself, taking a timed breath and preparing for the next spin, mentally and physically. As soon as his feet cross, his body looks like a speeding drill spiraling into the ice with his blades.

Yet the look on his face doesn’t look sexual, eros seems to be slipping as he focused harshly on the appearance of the jumps, Victor notices immediately. “Stop!” He shouts, adjusting his skates before grabbing a water bottle, “Stop! Stop!” The skating halts, the pupil looking up to see if something is wrong, seeing him approach.

“What? What’s wrong?”

“You’re slipping.” He holds up the bottle for him, “Losing your Eros, Yuuri, you’re not expressing it, do you feel okay?” 

The student accepts the water graciously and starts catching his breath before answering, “I feel fine, I thought that was one of my best practices lately.” He huffs, taking a gulp. “But then again, I can’t exactly watch myself too intently, can I?”

“Surprise!” Victor pulls out his phone, “Yes, you can! I’ve been filming some of our practice today. We can watch over dinner tonight, alright?”

“Well…” Yuuri must admit, he’s eager to see how he’ll look, as well as a little self-conscious, but that’s not why he’s wanting to protest.  
“…You look hesitant, did you want to reschedule date night?” Victor looks a little disappointed, they’d been doing their weekly night out every Monday for about a month, it was a good way to stay low in a non-crowded restaurant or theater. It was a way for them to be able to be open as long as they can before the press would be swarming them constantly. It was getting to be a pain.

Yuuri shakes his head, “No, no, I guess I was…just thinking we could look at that before or after…” His coach tilts his head, “Well….I want to just have a night with you, savor the time we’ve got. I adore everything you are to me, and I understand competitions are on their way, but….I want to keep coach Victor and……boyfriend…victor…separate.”

Victor’s confused and disappointed expression lights up, he’s melted completely. “You just called me your boyfriend~” He waves a finger at him, but then uses his hands to cover up the blush on his pale cheeks, Yuuri is soon matching and he starts gulping down his water bashfully. “Oh, I’m so embarassed~”

“Well…you are my…boyfriend…aren’t you? We’ve been at this about a month or so, and I don’t know what to call it otherwise…”

Though the taller one taunts, he does understand where his pupil is coming from, “Of course we’re boyfriends, very secretive ones, but boyfriends nonetheless!” He keeps his voice low, and he shakes his finger in the air, “But you’re right, I must keep Coach and Lover separate! We can watch the video after we finish with dinner~”

Yuuri looks relieved, glad he spoke up about how he felt, “Good, I was worried I had called you that too soon…”

“Nonsense, you’re too cute.” He chuckles, “But there’s one more thing I want to do before I go back to coach, okay?” Beholding down to him, Yuuri opens his mouth to question what he intends to happen, when he’s pulled by his wrist over to the side of the rink on the edge, and turned so his lower back is pressed against it. His russet eyes widen nervously, “Oh, don’t look so scared~ I just want to sneak a kiss in, I won’t let your coach know, alright?” He whispers into Yuuri’s ear, causing him to smile and want to smack his own hands over his face with embarrassment. 

“O-Only a minute…. okay?” He looks around, hopefully his friends are doing something that keeps them from coming in.

Victor sets his phone down on the table, setting up a timer, “Okay, a minute, I promise~” his hands come back to rest on his student’s hips, pulling them in to press against his, and presses his own lips onto Yuuri’s gently, yet readily. There’s positively a response as he feels the shorter one’s arms wrap around his shoulders fervently.

Yet there’s another motive to the sudden instant of romance, as he reaches hands to Yuuri’s lower back, slowly his fingers trail down to cup his muscular rear into his pale palms. There’s a mewl of breath that escapes between the lips that seem to want to devour each other, Victor pulls away for merely a second, forehead still pressed against his, “Oh, someone likes that~” The kiss rejoins, hips grinding against each other, and positively some hints of excitement arising between either one in the form of greedy lumps making them even more excited. The timer dings, making the two jump slightly, Victor chuckles, “Do you want me to go back to being your coach now~?” In the huffing of the kiss, he looks up to him, “Come on, I can’t hear you~”

Yuuri can pinpoint where his fingers squeeze onto his cheeks, and he was sensitive, “N-No, don’t stop….” He mumbles, trying to stay quiet; next thing he knows, they’re pressed up against each other again, and a tongue slips into his mouth, he can’t help but give in to the urge to pull him closer, returning that gesture breathlessly. They ached to be closer somehow, despite the only thing being the layers of clothing they each wore. The coach pulls away, skating backwards with his chest rising and falling in his weighted breath. “Why…w-why did you stop?” Those blue rimmed glasses were crooked and foggy as they sat on his nose…somewhat. 

“Yuuri~” He whispers, “I want you to skate Eros like this~…” His blue eyes trail down to the tight leggings that seem to be pitching a tent, and he bites his lip, “With as much excitement as you seem to have now~”

Yuuri huffs, legs a bit wobbly as he’s left pressed against the rink’s edge, but before he can have the energy to whine about it, he knows he’s right. “…Play the music.”

The difference was electric, watching his student taunted to the point of arousal, then set free to be a panther lurking to the ice made even him sweat at the thought; watching his twists and turns make him ache to touch him. He filmed it all on his phone, yet part of him felt like this should turn to some horizontal pair skate without the skates.

As Yuuri spun his last combination and halted in his pose, panting, he can see why that kiss helped so much. Perhaps his lover and coach could mix, even though he doubts Victor would be willing to shove his tongue down his pupil’s throat before every Eros skate….or would he? Looking up at the single person applauding him, he pants, staring him down.

“Yuuuuuuurriiiii! I didn’t expect that to work as well as it did!” He laughs, “Though I loved the sounds you make~ So incredibly sultry, and the skating? You were ravishing!” 

“R-Really?” The sound in his face was no longer the whine for the love he was being shown; those brown eyes turn into innocent pools of chocolate again, completely opposing that sensual tone in his gaze. “Because I was thinking, we should figure out a good motivation for the free program too! If that kiss triggered eros to look that good…”

Victor loses himself in the words, how the young man went from that irresistible panther to a cute little puppy once again was astounding. Though he can’t be too surprised, he was present for Yuuri the pole dancer, and again for Yuuri the drag makeup artist.

“You just keep on surprising me,” He chuckles, Yuuri stops rambling, looking up, “Come on, we’re done with practice for today, we’ll go have our date night, da?”

His endearing boyfriend smiles, starting to go to the exit of the ice arena, and Victor can’t help but watch after him, how he still felt so fluffy around him.


	23. A new weight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor's got love on his mind, what it really means to him to be falling for someone, especially for the sweet lovable boyfriend he's brought into his life.

Packing up everything he needs for his first block competiton, Yuuri is walking around his room while talking to Phichit off his laptop video chat, “You nervous at all for your first appearance with Victor as your coach?”

“Eh, a little, but only because we have to be more careful than usual. Hasetsu is barely even populated, so we can be more open while we stay here…” The Thai skater nods from his end, “Hell, even if we weren’t dating, I’d be nervous.”

“Well, I can understand why, but you know I have faith in you two.”

“Thank you,” He smiles over his shoulder and folds up a jacket. “How is competing against your lover going to be for you and Chris?”

Phichit sighs, “We’re getting connecting hotel rooms.” Yet he doesn’t sound nor look too happy.

“…Uh oh, what happened?” He stops packing to sit at his desk, frowning.

Rolling his grey eyes, Phichit crosses his arms, pouting on the screen, “Okay…I feel like Christophe is avoiding me….when we talked on the phone last week, I kept asking him when we could video chat and stuff, and he didn’t sound like he wanted to see me.” Yuuri’s a little surprised, and he must look it, “I know! I know! I tried calling him at a specific time I know he’d be free, and everything goes straight to voicemail, he’s only texting me and it’s all one word responses!”

It all ends with an annoyed breath of air, “Sounds…. like you guys need to talk this out, maybe figure out where you are in the relationship, I would be frustrated by it too. What was your last conversation like? Did either of you say anything that might have annoyed the other?”

“Not that I remember, I asked how his practice was, talked about how we’re going to do the hotel room thing, and at the end of the call, he barely even said goodbye…” 

Part of Yuuri feels like he should call Christophe and ask what’s going on there, but it’s unquestionably not his place to be meddling in, especially if something may have happened he has no business knowing. “I stand by the fact that when you guys see each other next, to sit down and have a talk, even if it results in a fight. It’ll be better than giving each other the silent treatment.”

Phichit nods and sighs, the grain of the computer screen didn’t do much to hide that glooming face, “I know, and we’ll be at the cup of China in a few weeks anyway, maybe if I just hold off on bitching him out, we can be adults about it at the hotel…”

“Other than that, how’s the relationship going?” Yuuri inquires, knowing at least thinking about the good things going on may be able to settle the nerves of his friend. 

He nods, looking fidgety, “Well, it’s been a little hard since we got to see each other for a two-week long vacation months ago, and now we’re secluded to a six-hour time zone difference. We’ve made it work, I call him when I finish practice and he’s on lunch and then he calls me when he finishes skating so we can talk before I have to head to bed…. I’ve taken to napping when I finish so I can stay up with him a bit.”

That made Yuuri smile, “That’s really nice, didn’t you say you wanted to plan a trip with him after Christmas?”

“Yeah, we wanted to go to the U.S. and I was going to show him where we used to live, but I don’t know if that’s a good idea anymore, so we’ll figure something out after the talk….anyway, it’s a bit late over here, I think I’m going to call him.”

“Okay, keep me updated, Phich, you know I’m here for you.” Phichit nods, thanks him, and ends the call.

Yuuri had arguments with Victor before, though he can’t imagine the silver haired man would ever be avoidant to him, especially after they’d been dating for a month and a half, and were about to see their first block competition in three days. Perhaps maybe he would be the avoidant one, it sounded more logical that he would be the one to do it more often, he’d have to watch for that. 

In fact, he’d been thinking about a lot of things lately, he’d felt incredibly guilty that his feelings towards Victor haven’t always been so innocent, how he’d accepted a lot of Victor’s help swayed by the notion that he’d been idolizing him for so long. Yet when the real human being that was his coach was around, it wasn’t idolization; and the certain sexual feelings he’d felt in the past felt less acquitted. This was a real person with real feelings that he had toyed with in the past for his own personal gain, and he was fully aware of it.

In fact, a few weeks prior with that kiss at the rink, that was the closes he’d ever come to anything sexual, it was important to him that Victor knew what he felt in regards to this. Perhaps he’d go talk to him sometime about it, and he’s conflicted on when to.

 

Victor is petting his poodle, facetiming with Chris and sitting on his bed, “Relax, Christophe, you’ve got two weeks until you’re gonna say it in person.”

“Victor, it’s bad enough I realized it last week, but this entire week has been killing me. I’ve never been in love, and I want to say it now, not in two weeks!” The Swiss man whines, “It’s taking forever.”

There’s a laugh between them as Victor rubs his dog’s tummy, “Now who’s the lovesick puppy? Have you thought of exactly what you’ll say and how you’ll say it?”

Blonde curls bounce as he flops on his pillow, the phone shifting with him, “Yes, every moment of every day. I thought of saying it in Thai just to make it special to him, but then I can’t remember exactly how everything’s pronounced and google translate won’t be of much help, they can barely translate anything there. What if I end up insulting his mother?” Christophe is less laid back than usual, Victor and himself were quite stone faced in many situations, keeping themselves above boiling water by never letting anyone know it burned. 

Luckily, when it came to talking to each other, it was always perfectly open, and today was a perfect example. He’d known Christophe was in love from the moment the swiss man had realized, for he called him at five in the morning, disturbing a cuddle session to tell him, and he made him promise to keep it quiet, even to Yuuri.

“Then you’ll have a funny story to tell the little blond babies in the future!” He jokes, only to get a green-eyed glare from his counterpart, “Listen, let me make it easy for you…. would you rather be able to say it when you can kiss him right in front of you, or over the phone where you can’t see his face through anything but a lit up cell phone screen?”

“…. damn you, you brat. Ruining all this fun for me…What about you? Any love yet?”

“From him? I don’t know. From me? I’ve been falling for him for a long time, but we’ve only been dating two months…. would it scare him if I said it?”

Christophe’s cat hops into the screen with him, “It might, but if you feel it, perhaps you should say it as well, before you two are forced to have to behave in public…. How long have you known?”

With a hesitation, Victor looks up at his door, making sure it’s shut, and then looks around the room, “…. Since the day after he won that competition, the Hot Springs on Ice.”

“Woah now! Woah, hold on, Victor…. you’ve been holding this in for six months? How on earth did you find out these feelings so soon for him?” There’s a pause, “And how the hell haven’t you told me?”

“Imagine all the good things that made you realize it, Chris, and then put them in a timeline of three ish months, and that’s how I feel.” He chuckles, sipping his water bottle and looking to Makkachin, patting him, “Maybe it is time I said something, da?”

“Making the rest of us look like whiney babies.”

“The rest of you shouldn’t be acting like them, you’re 25, Christophe,” He laughs. There’s some expletives in Swiss he doesn’t quite understand completely, but he gets the gist of it, and he taunts back with a few in his own mother language.

The phone beeps, “Oof, Victor, that’s him. I’m going to let you go.”

“Don’t accidentally propose, you big sap.” There’s the middle finger he knows and loves; ending the call, Victor sighs, looking down to his puppy dog. “Perhaps I should talk to Yuuri, I know it’s only been a little while, but…he’ll understand, won’t he?” Makkachin sits up, licking at his face, “Oh, will you be my practice? Such a cute little puppy!” The excited dog wiggles from his tail wagging, even making the bed shake a bit.

Sitting him still, he scratches his ears, “Yuuri, who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy? You’re a good boy!” Makkachin barks and even snorts, “You’re right, you’re the good boy. Yuuri’s a fine boy.” Satisfied puppy is satisfied, especially with his owner paying so much attention to him. “Hmm…How about…I hire a gardener to write it in blue roses in a red rose field and take him on a helicopter trip? A big ol’ ‘I love you, Yuuri’ above them.” There’s another whine, “Maybe I should just…. tell him I’ve been in love with him for a long time. Tell him how I’ve been waiting to kiss him from the end of winter to the end of summer…. I’m not usually one to be this pitifully adoring towards another person, but for him I’d take the chance~. What do you think Makkachin? Eh? Confess my love?”

What a silly dog, he just rolls onto his back for tummy rubs.

With a sigh, he stretches, looking up to see his door is cracked, something it wasn’t two minutes ago. Something in his chest shatters, someone must have heard him, someone must have cracked the door, and it could be a stranger who could out him, or it could be…

“Yuuri.” He whispers, staring at the crack, it doesn’t move, but he can hear the tense sound of someone holding their breath, he jumps out of bed, running over to open it with panic in his eyes. It was exactly as he feared, before him was the black-haired man in glasses, a look of terror had crossed his face, he was clutching his phone to his chest with one hand, and covering his mouth with the other. “…Yuuri, we need to talk.” He sighs, yet the young man won’t move, he doesn’t budge, his pupils just look Victor up and down, unsure if they’re about to burst into tears or not. 

“…. You……. love me….” He states behind his hand, shaking like a leaf, Victor was distraught, unable to understand if he was taking it well or not, blind to if those feelings were mutual. “I…… I….. I need to sit down.”

Victor knows that face, it was the face Yuuri had made in the past when he fainted the first time he’d shown up, maybe he should go see a doctor about that. Quickly, he rushes over, just in time really to scoop him up, walking him over to the chair in his room, Yuuri was covering his face in those sweaty palms and had no idea what to say. 

In his mind, everything he was going to confess and thought was silly to begin with now that he was dating such a wonderful person…. was so miniscule all the sudden, he was hearing that Victor Nikiforov was in love with him. “I…. I don’t understand….”

“Yuuri…” He kneels before him and looks around, trying to figure out if there was anything in this room that could help. To no avail, he turns back to him, “You weren’t supposed to find out this way, I was going to talk to you, I was, I swear.”

“How long did you say? How long have you known?” He uncovers his eyes, luckily for the coach, no tears had shown up, yet he was still quite worried they would eventually.

He sighs, rubbing his temples, “….I’ve been in love since you accepted me as your coach after the Hot Springs on Ice….two days after I think….” Somehow he thought that adding an extra day onto that would make a difference, until he had said something out loud. 

Obviously shocked, he hunches over, running his hands into his dark hair, “Oh my god, I just….I don’t know what to say to it, I’m….Why?”

That’s where he was confused, “Why what?”

He looks up to his coach, frowning, “Why would you fall in love with me?” It took Victor a moment before he grasped Yuuri was asking an actual question, and that was more devastating than everything. Yuuri couldn’t understand why someone would want to love him.


	24. My theme is you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy oh boy oh boy there's some lovey dovey crap in this one.

Victor was less astounded, and more concerned over the fact that his own lover could say something so terrible about himself. Yet his mind goes to that first date on the beach, where Yuuri explained his best about anxiety and depression. “This…this must be like that ship in the bottle…” Victor wants to hold his hand, kiss his cheek, something . “Yuuri…” He begins, “I love you….for many reasons, not just one…” He’s afraid of frightening him further, and he just keeps his unsteady hands to himself as he says the words, wishing he’d gotten to choose when his lover would know. “I know the new world of dating is frustrating sometimes, and I’m going to try to tell you something important, I hope you understand, it’s not like books or shows or movies…” Yuuri pulls his knees up into the chair with him, hugging them to his chest, “One of the biggest truths about this is that you don’t have to fall in love at the same time as your partner.”

Looking up from his curled position, those words seemed to reach out to him, “…You don’t?”

“I know, I know, media makes everything look different.” He smiles a little. “I’ve held it in for a long time, and it’s hurt quite a bit in hiding it from you…but it would hurt me even more if you said you loved me back and didn’t mean it.” He gently takes a shaky hand and places a kiss on the fingers, “You don’t need to say it back for me to know you care about me, and if it takes you years to say it, I’ll be here to accept it with a hug and a kiss.”

Yuuri adored those words that came from him, and he knew he cared for Victor, quite possibly even loved him back, but he was scared to death to say it back, perhaps it was silly, but he didn’t want to make him even more upset by mistaking it as love. What if it wasn’t? It was terrifying to think of the ‘what if’, and his anxiety was through the roof and ready to tear him apart.

“…I think…I need to go lay down…” He looks back down to his hands, “I really want to talk about this again, but….I’m really stressed…” Victor’s impressed, Yuuri’s trying to rationalize when he’s obviously going through a very emotional transition into this miniature panic attack, and it makes him proud. “I want to say all the stuff on my mind after I think about it…okay?”

The coach nods and releases his hand, then stands to grab the pillow on the left side of the bed, “Please, sleep in here tonight, I’ll sleep in your bed, and you’ll stay warmer and get better rested. Makkachin can even warm you up.” Yuuri shakes his head.

“I want you to be in here, just because I need time to think doesn’t mean I’ll kick you out of your own room…” He stands up, surprised at his own reaction to the nervous feeling within him. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

There’s an understanding between the young men, and the eldest one nods, “You talk to me when you’re ready, okay? No deadline, I’ll see you in the morning.”

Yuuri steps out, heading down the hall to the other side of the spring, a familiar feeling in his gut that told him food would make him feel better. That’s not the answer, and he knows how this situation would play out with hiding eating and making unhealthy habits again, he had to make sure he was staying out of the kitchen for any stress consumption. Though there is a pause in front of the kitchen to see if there’s any Katsudon left, he turns his head away and looks up to the doorway again, _“I can last without a pork bowl…besides, if you win in three days, you get one anyway.”_ Satisfied with that thought, he continues back to his room quietly

 

It’s early in the rink, Yuuri has come in at the same time as Yuko, the early morning clouds packed the skies and hinted of fresh fall rain ready to come down on this mid-September dawn. He needed to be here this early, it was the final practice before the trip to the block championship, the first step to show the world he wasn’t through yet. There was no better fuel for him to skate when there was something on his mind, even if it would be filled with falls and flubbing a step sequence, but he had to think in a place that brought him peace. And victor couldn’t be there. He’d left the coach asleep, having decided to come in an hour before his actual alarm would go off.

“The ice is all yours, Yuuri,” Yuko smiles, “I’ll be making sure the girls don’t interrupt you when they come in before school, Takeshi will be here in a bit with them, so we’ll keep your door locked.” She winks gently, meaning to show him a bit of compassion, though he just nods sternly and goes through the doors to his familiar frozen office. “Yikes, something’s bugging him….I wonder if he’s just nervous for the competition….?” She decides to check in from time to time to make sure everything’s alright.

Putting on his skates and tying up the laces tightly, he stretches out his legs and starts with some average arm pulls. _“Victor loves me.”_ He gulps at the thought, squinting his eyes shut when the words appear, _“He loves you, he could have the whole world, and in the time he’s had with you, he’s been in love. It’s been nearly all the time you’ve known him.”_ Standing up and adjusting his team jacket, he steps onto the ice and starts gently gliding, getting himself used to balancing on those thin blades barely there to hold him up above the hard surface. _“You’ve adored him, hell, loved him for a long time….Is it idolizing or is it love? How would you know?”_

Putting his head down, he starts lunging to speed on the edges of the rink, limber up his hips as he races across the edge. _“I don’t know if it’s love, but somehow looking up to him isn’t a thing I do anymore; honestly, he’s seen me at eye level this entire time, without letting me depend on him for that.”_ His body angles as he turns sharply to avoid the plastic advertisement that bordered. _“Even when we started dating, he felt honest in everything he’s ever done, and I can’t say I’ve ever done the same.”_ Brown eyes focus on his next step as he prepares himself to quicken his pace a little more. _“Okay, okay, okay…maybe thinking it this way is harder because I’m trying to figure out what this love is, maybe I should compare my feelings to everything else….”_

Yuko glances out the windows from the doorway to make sure everything’s alright, seeing her friend with the contemplative look on his face, she grows concerned and crosses her arms, wondering if she should call Victor.

 _“I’ve felt some forms of love before; my parents have always loved me, even when I left for five years straight. I love the Nishigori family, those two have been my support team for so long, and they’ve never made me feel like an outsider….”_ He slows down a little bit to take a deep breath, _“Minako has always made sure I didn’t suffocate in just one way of dancing, she taught me what I asked, she’s like my loving aunt. And Phichit? I love him so much, he’s always been the best friend I could ask for…Imagining my life without having someone to help me with insomnia or anxiety attacks, especially the way he does, I could be a lot worse.”_

Figuratively comparing the types of love, familial, friend, neighborly love, and the love for things he’s known in this world, mainly skating. All were so strong in his life, and yet he absolutely knew what he was feeling for Victor may be scary, but it’s there, and he wants to express it.

When Victor walks in with his equipment, he notices his lover is doing some warm ups on the ice, he’s unsure if it’s a good thing after last night’s discussion. He was surprised Yuuri had even wanted to do one last skate practice before their trip for the first block competition, yet he knew the man he adored was persistent. Perhaps it was an indicator for how nervous he was to step out after stealing a universally adored athlete to become his coach.

Silently, Victor sets up the small speaker, getting his few books out for the plans of the whole grand prix, in case they needed to look over the point system or the rules one more time. Placing the CD down beside the small music player, he looks up, meeting eyes with his pupil, who’s approaching slowly. “Good morning, Yuuri.” He smiles, trying to seem as calming as he can, “Eager to get on the ice, it’s what I like to see!”  
“Any other warmups you need me to do before we get started?”

“Yes, I need you to do some basic training to limber up, I think it’ll do you some good.” The student nods, stepping off the ice, he sits to remove his skates. The pair were professionally platonic today, sticking to their hard work, though perhaps it was practice for when they had to be in front of cameras and press.

After stretches and basic exercise, Yuuri works on his poses on the ice, a few instances of new motions were enticing to look at, yet the coach wasn’t sure what they were all for; all he knew was he had given Yuuri the freedom of expression in his work. “I like that last one, did you want me to film those so you could see them?”

He shakes his head, continuing to practice how his appearance would look, still as quiet as before. Victor understands the silence, and he looks back to the book, hiding his frown behind those pages as he reads on; he’d hoped at least some words would be exchanged today. He felt like the love confession was turning into something he should apologize for somehow, and it was more painful than holding it in for so long.

“Yuuri,” He calls, “According to the competition guidelines, we’re missing two things. You need to name your music on your CD, and you need to choose a theme for the announcers.”

Yuuri steps off the ice, looking up at his coach, “Do you have a marker?” Nodding, he passes the black one over, watching him write on the CD. At first it takes him a moment, unsure why he’s writing it in English letters, but he sees the scribble of ‘Yuuri on ice’ take the title. Something about that was soothing, as though it was marking the start of the young man’s career again, like he was reborn.

“And your theme?” He asks as he closes the case to let it dry, turning to put it away.

Yuuri gulps quietly, looking up, clenching his fists, he finds it’s much easier to say it without turning into a bashful mess while he’s looking at the back of his boyfriend’s head, “My theme is: On my Love.” The words lingered in the empty rink a moment.

Victor himself was halted, turning his head to look at his other party, blue eyes seemed to be searching for any indication of doubt in his face, yet he’s met with a smile he had missed for the entire practice, “YUUUUUURRRRIIIIIII!!!” He squeals, throwing his arms around him and giving him little pecked kisses all over.


	25. Short Program!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second time uploading, I"m so sorry for the issues, it's been fixed.

There they were, in the arena the day of the block competition, and while Yuuri knew what to expect, Victor was surprised to see his little Katsudon may be the tallest skater there. God did that make him feel old. His hairline could recede at the speed of light if he stayed here too long. Yuuri had gone ahead and driven out for the pre-stretch and order event with Minako and Takeshi, leaving Victor to go out to pick up his new suit he would make his coach debut in.

Yes, he wasn’t the center of attention, but damn did he look good in his overcoat and gloves, like he was a real coach.

Yuuri had been picked to go first, he’d trusted he would get last, or rather anything except what he pulled out of the hat. He would be the first impression of this competition, and he’s not sure his performance could be memorable. His trail of thoughts are interrupted by some sort of cartoon mouse noise beside him, a teenager skater, Minami Kenjirou, he was nearly wiggling out of his chair in exhilaration. “I can’t believe I got to see you draw….TWO YEARS in a ROW!” He squeaked, Yuuri blinks and looks around, wondering if those endearing words were directed towards him. It would seem the blonde kid with a big red streak in his bangs was doing the infamous fangirling dance in his seat, quite masterfully at that.

Though he did remember this young man, a teen, who had beaten him brutally in nationals last year. _“Minami…that’s right, it feels like yesterday since this kid beat me for my free skate.”_ Boy, that felt great to remember. Staring at his hair a moment, it somewhat reminds him of ketchup and mustard, or Mcdonalds or something. _“This chicken nugget kicked my ass last year and he’s still my fan.”_

Minako calls him over from the door, “Yuuri! Where’s your coach? I need to ask him where our seats are!” He’d nearly forgotten she was coming to cheer him on, he turns to the child and nods his head.

“Excuse me.” Walking over to the dance instructor, he shakes his head, “No, he was meeting with the announcers to give them my overview for the program today and tomorrow.” His eyes search the room, trying to see if he can locate the silver haired teacher in the crowd, despite his best efforts, it’s hard to see much when you don’t have your glasses on and everyone looks like one giant moving blob from where he stood.

Takeshi brings over some bottles of water, he’d offered to come along and make sure his friend was being taken care of. “Where are you on the bracket?”

“I’m going first.” He cracks open a bottle and starts gulping some down, but is sidetracked by cameras and bustling of press. _“….I bet that’s the boyfriend.”_

Sure enough, Victor steps through the tunnel of paparazzi, suited up, gloved, and looking handsome as always. Of course he’s the snazziest looking coach of the entire group that had come today. “Yuuri!” He smiles, taking off his sunglasses and walking over with a wink, “How do I look?”

Takeshi butts in, “I see you spared no expense for the suit.” Raising an eyebrow and glancing to Yuuri, who doesn’t answer.

Victor giggles, “It’s my debut as a coach, what can I say? I have to look my best!” Though he can sense the burly man dislikes him, he’s unsure why really.

Yuuri looks up to the PA, an announcer was giving the time marker for the first warmup skate, and then following would be the first performer: himself. He turns to the group, “I have to go do interviews and then change, why don’t you guys go to your seats? Victor, you have the tickets?” Before he can even finish the sentence, his coach is handing them their seat tickets, right in a good spot to watch, he’d made sure to pull some strings.

It was time for the press conference, and he’ll be bound to his coach’s side for professional appearances, yet he’ll be unable to hold his hand or lean on him for luxury and comfort.

As the public pours into the seating areas, the lobby is left with the skaters and the journalists; Yuuri is guided over with his boyfriend before the posters where his face sat. Victor was used to these cameras, used to being worshipped by the press, and all the many pictures of himself being perfect at every angle. Yet as he stands before the press, those feelings of nervous wreckage hit before the first camera even shutters. He knows what they’re going to ask first, and he’s not sure he’s prepared an answer for anything, usually he’s at least thought about it before this.

“Good morning, everyone!” Victor greets, nodding his head politely, everyone smiles like he’s an old friend, and the nerves lift instantly. “I trust you’re all here as fans of my protégé, I think you’ll be as proud of him as I am!” They chuckle, it makes Yuuri more relaxed, having someone so charismatic to keep him steady. “Now, why don’t we make this quick and save that interesting stuff for after he wows you?”

_“Okay, Victor. No pressure or anything.”_

The first reporter stands up, “What’s the plan for you two if Katsuki Yuuri makes it to the Grand Prix series?”

Strange, though he wasn’t the biggest fan of the press, having this skater become his coach took the cameras and the journalists and redirected the attention to Victor. Part of him is relieved, but then again, he’s the one that will be representing Japan if he wins this championship. Perhaps they should deliberate it later.

“The plan is for Yuuri to take it easy today, and save all that good stuff for the Cup of China.”

That was alarming, Yuuri whips his head over with a frown, “Victor” He warns through clenched teeth, “I don’t know how you’ve forgotten so many times, but oh my god, I bombed last year, in almost every competition I completed.”

“…. Wow.” Victor’s expression remains cheerful, but he’s probably taking notes of that somewhere in that silver noggin.

A journalist stands up, “And what is your career plan at this point?”

Yuuri looks over, glad to get a question to answer, “Well, at this point, I’d like to…”

“Oh!” She grimaces, “I apologize, that question was for Mr. Nikiforov.”

Victor feels a bit of frustration as he sees his boyfriend shut down from an interview that is supposed to be about his big debut as someone brand new in their beloved career. “I ask that your questions be directed to the actual star today, my student is the one here to perform for Japan, not to hear me answer questions about my career.”

Yuuri glances around as the questions die down after that, he’s a little disappointed, like he was going to have a lot more to be excited for after they spoke. _“Well, this is what comes with dating an athletic celebrity, I suppose…”_

“Yuuri?” Victor puts a hand on his shoulder, “You have a costume to change into, let’s get you ready.”

The cameras flash as the pair turn over towards the locker room and walk in, and the group of reporters turn to go to the next skater, all of whom are just waiting in a line to talk before their own posters.

Coach Nikiforov can nearly sense the goosebumps and the dissatisfaction on his student, he wanted to say something, but he feels guilty that Yuuri had said less than ten words in an interview that turned into Victor’s. “Maybe when we talk to them after the skate,” He breaks the peace between them, getting the costume out. There’s self-esteem missing here, and it drilled deep into his chest as he unrolls the spandex and hangs it on the small hanger in the locker before him. “Think they got the hint?” He jokes a little.

Victor just smiles to him, wishing he could kiss him, or even his hand, but there was only so much he could readily do without seeming like there was something between them.

His student was in competition mode, he has shut off his shy eyes, becoming determined and harder to read. He takes his jacket off, setting them into the top shelf of his locker, then takes off his athletic shirt and his pants, wearing tights beneath them that keep him warm. Victor gets a familiar idea as his blue eyes scan down his body, and he looks around to see where the people in the room are. It seems as though the last coach who’s dropping a bag off before a locker just leaves. They’re alone.

Yuuri was about to take his Eros costume, when he felt a hot breath against his ear, and a hand sliding down his side to the edge of the tight’s, a finger looping under the band. It felt like Victor’s hand had undressed him completely in one stroke, yet he was still in his garment. “….V-Victor…” He looks up at the gaze, meeting an icy blue primal look, and he gulps. “Someone’s going to see us…”

“You’re too irresistible to me, Yuuri…I need to kiss you…” He whispers against that ear, his teeth take a gentle hold and tug on the lobe as a huff of warm air hissed through his teeth, “There’s a private dressing room here….if you want to keep feeling my wandering hands~”

Yuuri gulps, a blush covering his face, “Everyone might see my…...m-my tights are going to show everything…”

“I could take care of it all for you~” He whispers, “all I need is my mouth, you can be my little Vitenka…”

That Russian word alone nearly moaned into his ear was enough for Yuuri to shudder and grip tight onto his shirt that sat in his hands; the noises outside the door were getting louder, like people were about to come in. “……V-Victor, there’s people coming.”

“Too bad~” He whispers, “You’ll have to show me your Eros another way, I suppose~”

Yuuri starts sliding on the Eros costume, “I suppose I will…zip me up?”

It was a good thing they stopped, the doors open as the skaters spill in, and he bites his lip, “With pleasure.”

The warm up skate was hard to do when Yuuri was thinking of how badly he wanted to be kissed, how badly he wanted Victor in that moment. That proposal of sneaking off first day of having to pretend to be platonic, victor wanted to taste him. He wanted to feel it, the way Victor claims with his lips, even when they were to everything neck up, and it made him think about what it must be like to taste his lover right back. The urge was definite to talk about the thought of what he wanted to feel with him; it fueled his appeal.

Luckily, the ice was very cold, and it cooled him down a bit as he hears the announcement to exit the ice for the first performance. He just glides over to the exit where the coach awaits him, holding some tissue and water, back to being his goofy self it seemed. “Yuuri! Look! Makkachin came to cheer you on!” The tissue box cover was a spitting image; it was very cute. Yet the skater just steps off with a nod, where he notices a young Minami stands nearby, starstruck.

Victor ganders over his shoulder, and he can’t help but beam, this teenager may be about seventeen, maybe eighteen, but he looks like a kid at Disney. _“This must have been how Yuuri felt at competitions with me~, oh, this is too precious!”_

“G-Good luck out there!” The childlike teen peeps, looking like he’s ready to cry with happiness.

Yuuri doesn’t really respond, he doesn’t understand why this kid is so enthralled with him, he just nods and turns to get his drink of water.

 _“…I was certainly not as rude as he just was, what the hell was that?”_  
The young teen looks disappointed and he gulps, looking over to the coach and walking over.

Victor frowns, “Yuuri!” That tone was very…. coach-like. The grown man looks over to face him, “How can you expect to motivate yourself when you can’t even do so for those who look up to you?” Crossing his arms, non-joking tone, Yuuri’s not sure he’s ever pissed him off before. “You should always make time for your fans.”

Yuuri sighs, though that was one of his biggest flaws, closing himself down when he was nervous, even to the few fans he did have. He should make it up to that teen, perhaps he’ll cheer for him during the program when he’s about to go on.

As he enters the ice again, he’s announced with the pair of deep voices giving details about Eros in his upcoming program, it’s starting to get quite annoying that they feel the need to include sexual attraction towards the pork cutlet bowl all the time. Especially since his eros was and always has been for that man on the side, he looks to him longingly, hoping he can apologize for his shut off behavior.

Victor looks stern, “…Yuuri, turn around.” He mumbles, his partner has a confused expression and tilts his head, did he not want to look at him? “just do it.” So he shrugs and chances his back to his coach as instructed, sipping his water still. A pair of arms take hold of him lovingly, he’s actually quite surprised he’s so affectionate in this crowded public place. Cameras flash over to them and he gulps.

“V-Victor?”

“This is the closest we’ll come, Yuuri, seduce me with all you’ve got.” He hears whispered against the same ear he had bitten tenderly before. Yuuri smiles and gives the water bottle over, skating towards the middle of the ice, the roar of cheering starts getting louder as he makes his starting pose, back arched and head tilted.

He barely needs the music to keep him on track, his body moves like this is what he was born to do, to show the world he was in charge, that he was their Vitenka. When his eyes pop open, and he shoots his seductive glance at Victor, this one was more ablaze with desire than the last competition, and his lover noticed. His thoughts go back to when he first started his job as an exotic dancer, how he’d take the attention of every pair of eyes in the building just by his walk, by the seductive pout in his painted red lips. He remembered driving his patrons crazy when his tongue would stroke his top lip, how he could take down any and every person he chose by the way he moved.

He wanted Victor to be there when he had that attention, his hips garnished with the lace garter and belt. _“Nobody can satisfy Victor like me._ ” Imagining himself, Yuuri can see Victor being unable to resist himself, being weak in the knees from wanting to touch him, desire alone. _“I want the world to know he’s mine, I want them to know I don’t care if they want him back.”_

Yuuri’s mind starts to wander, being too excited to show the world what he’s learned, on his first jump in the second, he gets the rotations, yet he touches down. Scrambling his focus as he tries to guise back to where he was. Luckily, it doesn’t take longer than a second, and he looks less…alluring suddenly, the nervous expression frazzles him, and he’s doing the math in his head to assure he’s definitely got the right amount of rotations.

_“Yuuri, you’re getting nervous, don’t get nervous, you have to pay attention.”_

Before he knew it, he’s spinning that last combination to skid into his own arms, wrapped together like he was in his lover’s arms. All eyes were on him, just as he wanted, they were enthralled, amazed, he’d done pretty well considering the touch down.

He waves, taking in the joy of his fans, as he slowly skates towards his coach, the two of them share a gaze more knowing than the rest of the crowd could know. Yet there’s a smile he despises sitting on those cheeks, the coach smile, and he gets himself ready to hear about his jumps. “Yuuri…. you over focused on those jumps, we’ve talked about this.” Oh boy, this again. “Tomorrow during your free program, you’ll have to lower your difficulty, okay?”

“B-But Victor!”

“Katsuki Yuuri!” The announcers call, the two of them freeze as they whip their gaze over to the screen above the ice, in their places they’re stuck. “94.36!”

That score, he didn’t expect it to be so high for touching down, let alone to get a good score. Victor hugs him and pats his shoulder, perhaps he’d heard it wrong and his blind eyes were playing tricks on him? That was a personal best. “Yuuri, I thought for sure you’d break 100, but you did quite well!”

He smiles, looking to his coach, the look on his face was pure and sweet, even after such a raunchy performance where he was daydreaming of giving his own boyfriend a hard on. Perhaps he should keep saying he thinks about pork cutlet bowls, for the world’s sake.

Immediately, they’re ushered off to go see the press into the lobby, so the other skaters can prepare themselves for their performances. One of the better-known reporters is the most excited out of the bunch, Marooka perhaps? “Katsuki Yuuri!” he already begins before they can make it to the area for questioning, “What a difference from seeing you at Hot Springs on Ice! It’s like you’ve been reborn!”

Victor nudges him to speak, having them stop before those posters like before. Yuuri feels the poke in his side and takes a deep breath, “I feel stronger since then. I’m having a new look on life this past…well…almost a year since victor’s been training me.”  
“Do you think Coach Celestino’s coaching was ineffective then? Compared to Coach Nikiforov?”

He shakes his head, “Not at all, coach Celestino was one of the most involved coaches I could hope for, he was like family.” Yuuri did remember many times where he was homesick, and his coach knew to speak to him kindly and to make sure he was eating and sleeping. Though doing both of those too much or too little was a constant problem.

Another question comes from the back, “And how does that tie into your crushing defeat at the last series?”

Victor wants to answer this with a snarky remark, wanting to have that lady sit down. He can see the Japanese man’s shoulders tense up as he takes a deep breath, “I was in a rough place in my life, and after I came back to Japan, my support I got from friends, family, fans, and my coach…I was ready to train to represent japan again.”

The coach was quite proud of his student for answering like he did, it was hard to go through a crisis and need to take care of oneself, let alone admit it. He knew it wasn’t an easy question to answer. They answer a few more, discussing costume, how he thinks of other skaters, brands he uses for his equipment, other small bits, until he hears a voice behind him.

“Did you see me?” He looks down to see Minami, a big smile on his young face.

“Ah!” An internal kick to his head is felt, “Did you go on already? I was in an interview; I didn’t get to see!”

Perhaps Yuuri should have lied, the returning expression was a demolished young child, he was heartbroken. “What? B-But I styled my costume just like your junior’s costume final for this!” Opening his very loose jacket, Yuuri recognizes the style right away.

“oh boy…from my dark past in Juniors…” The whole leotard was decked in rhinestones and glitter, making him grimace internally. _“You poor chicken nugget, you looked up to me?”_

Oh no, why does the kid look even more upset? “What dark past?” Oh nononono. “You don’t have a dark past! And when you say you do, it makes fun of us fans who are looking up to you!”

_“Shit, the chicken nugget is angry, what do I do??”_

There’s a challenging finger pointed at him, “You’d better skate your best tomorrow, or I won’t forgive you!”

The eyes in the back of his head can sense the press is getting riled up, and he gulps, this was him six years ago, determination and all. It was painful to realize it, and he takes a deep breath, stepping forward with a hand outreached. What this boy needed was someone to take him seriously as a competitor, and he intended on showing it. “Bring your best game tomorrow, Minami.”


	26. The first time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Exactly as the title images, Yuuri's ready to bring their relationship to a new level, he's ready for that big step, and he's going to seduce the hell out of his coach!

 

Opening the hotel room door, Yuuri sighs, pulling his suitcase in behind him with intentions of dropping it and himself on the bed.  He’s exhausted from barely sleeping the night before, again, and he avoided letting Victor know in case he would force him to sleep 20 hours until tomorrow’s next competition.  Speaking of which, he’s not yet returned to their double bed hotel room, he must have gone out to talk to the press about the challenge the chicken nugget stated to him, or perhaps to get food.

 

Yuuri lays on his back and looks up to the ceiling, he’d had a lot on his mind lately, and it hasn’t just been because of today’s little locker room incident.  The two had barely managed to keep their hands to themselves on their first day of platonic coach-hood.   Though it sounded like something Victor would have done for a kink, he wondered if the risk of being in public was his turn on.  _“I could like that…”_

 

There was no time for actual fantasizing about it, the pupil had plans for his coach, and he’s been planning it for about a week before their trip.  Standing up from the bed, he unzips his suitcase, pulling out a miniature bag inside, rolled up lingerie, stockings, and some supplies.  There’s a glass plug he’ll use to stretch himself with, some lube of course, because you can’t have good anal sex without it, and if he needs it, a tube of red lipstick.  His thoughts of the garter and belt weren’t just for pretend on the ice, he’d bought it specifically for their first night in the hotel room.  It couldn’t be like the one’s he’d gathered from his old dancing days, this had to be for this moment.

 

There’s a little bit of preparation as he gets the plug lubed, as well as himself, and with a gentle press against his entrance, Yuuri has that familiar feeling of gentle pressing against his sensitive taint.  He trembles in the fingers a moment, the glass was a little cold against him, but this was one time that chill couldn’t bother him.  He had seducing to do. After donning his hips with the belt, he has to check the bathroom mirror to be sure it looks alright, humming as he contemplates putting on the tights with them.  He could show as much skin as possible, or test the waters of a sock kink.  _“Let’s see how your legs look with them perhaps…”_   Stepping back over to the bed, he shakes the pair out, they’re shimmering and dark, but it would contrast beautifully on his skin.  _“…well…if he doesn’t like them, he can pull them off, that’s essentially the worst that could happen with hose.”_ Then slipping the stockings all the way up to squeeze on his muscular legs, he hooks the little straps onto them, all dark blue as he finishes it off with a satin robe covered in lace on the bottom rim.  The cute little floral lace is just barely covering the halfway point of his supple rear.

 

There was no better place for this, a private room, locked doors, a view, room service, it was already better than being heard through the thin walls at home for their hopeful first time.  That is if Victor were to consent, though there’s little doubt he’ll say no.

 

He tucks himself back under the blanket, wanting to make sure when the door does happen to open, the press won’t have him in lingerie to put on their papers should they be stalking the hallways.  The 23-year-old lays back down and stares at the ceiling for a bit, trying to think if he’s going too far on this surprise, maybe being too forward, but every thought leads him back to how badly he wants to do this.

 

The talk of sex between them was drawn out over the past few months of being together, mostly Yuuri felt uncomfortable with it, his confidence lacking.  It didn’t mean they didn’t tease or taunt, how their kisses would get so heated and heaving, it would get hard to breathe.  There’d been stroking against each other in their wake ups, the press of morning wood against the blankets, making it quite difficult to resist some mornings.  They wanted to wait a little bit, until a special moment when they were both ready, and until now, Yuuri was the one reluctantly holding back.

 

Today was the day, and he’s more nervous for this than he was to get on the ice this morning. What if he declines? What if Yuuri looks like a fool for all this pressure about to unfold?  No.  They were ready.  He just had to hear, ‘yes’.  Yuuri adjusts at the feel of the plug within as he tenses and loosens up, that alone was enough to give him a moan as he wriggles in the blankets, he hoped his lover would come in soon so he can show him what he’s made of.

 

The door key pings, heard from the other side of the entrance to their room, it makes Yuuri peek up from beneath his blankets anxiously, until he remembers he’s supposed to be pretending to sleep, per his plan in his head.   The nervous wreck wanted to make it seem both cute and sexy somehow, as that seemed to be working this far in the relationship.

 

Victor walks in with some Styrofoam boxes, it was quiet, so there must not be anyone with him.  His lover closes the door and bolts it, then turns to the small table by the couch to set all the food down.  Victor looks up to see him burying his face into the pillows, which warmed him with a loving feeling.  _“Ooohhh, my poor little Yuuri is so tired…but I know he needs to eat, he’ll sleep better with a full tummy!”_   Slowly, he steps over and kneels beside the bed, stroking some hair out of his face.  “Yuuri, I know you’re tired b….”  His eyes are drawn to the blue satin just barely showing from beneath the blanket.  _“…Yuuri’s pajamas don’t look anything like that.”_   He peels the blanket away slowly.  _“…. Mother of god…”_

 

Yuuri opens his eyes, his hand raises up to gently stroke at the open robe’s rim on his chest as soft as the fabric itself, trying to use his seductive eyes.  “Vitya~…”  he bats his eyes to him, that voice was so sweet and breathy as the words gently trickled from those beautiful lips, he can pinpoint his lover’s heart skipping a few beats.  “Do you like your surprise?  I wrapped it just for you~”

 

The way he had said Vitya, it sent chills up his back, his blue eyes scanned his body as he pulled the blankets up further, stockings decorating his little piggy’s thighs. “Yuuri! How bold~”

 

His paramour sits up, presenting his body wrapped in a needy little cutlet bowl of a man, and he leans forward to caress his lips.  Victor was hungry for any touch, and as he was kissed, it was as though they were trying to devour each other.  A pair of arms was pulling Yuuri closer by the waist, hands gently feeling down his sides, stroking behind the edge of the robe.  Exactly the feeling he ached all day long.  Their tongues pull away from each other for just a moment as Victor growls endearingly, “You want me to keep my promise to suck you off~?”  His hot breath dances on his cheeks between their fervent kisses.

 

Yuuri pulls back, panting as he gently tugs on the long thin tie of his coach in one hand, “I want to see all of you, think you can do that for me?”  He was actually internally screaming, wanting to hide his face for saying such corny things.  His nerves are settled by the melted expression on that silver haired man’s face, he’s got total control of him.

 

Victor stands up, starting to undress as quickly as he can, the expensive coat, button up, tie, shoes, all fling to the other bed in the room.  As he is taking off his pants, he looks down to the stocking covered toes, which curl nervously as he does, “…Yuuri?”

 

 _“…Fuck, did I look scared? I was trying not to!”_   There’s an audible gulp as he looks up.

 

“…Before we do anything, I want to make sure, are you 100% ready for this?” The tone sounds serious in here suddenly, “I need to know you won’t be afraid to say you need me to stop.”

 

Yuuri takes a deep breath through his nose, exhaling through his mouth, “I’m ready, I’ll let you know if it’s too much for me, alright?” That promise helped Victor feel more comfortable with pulling his underwear down, and his boyfriend’s brown eyes study every inch of him.  The sexual gaze has turned tense, like he’s focusing too hard, like he’s in the middle of a performance.  He leans forward at this sight, looking up to Victor with those big beautiful eyes, his mouth opens as his tongue strokes against the tip, _what a sight_. 

 

The way he tried his best to be as sexy as possible, Yuuri wraps his lips around the girthy cock and starts sliding it into his mouth, humming as he slides in deeper without choking.  It was a bit of an effort, as he really didn’t practice too much when he was at home working on himself, maybe he should have, he looks uncomfortable.

 

 _“Aw, that poor thing is trying not to be nervous, I should help him relax~”_ Victor runs his hand through the black hair of his lover, smiling and stepping back to pull his length from his lips.  “It’s a little tough at first, but don’t think you have to fit it all in your mouth at once~.”  Yuuri gulps a bit, his tongue feels…not sticky, but like he had a coating of goop on his throat.  He knew what it was, he’d just never taken the time to taste it before.  “Please, let me~” He kneels onto the floor, pulling up those decorated legs, leaving kisses, some bites on his inner thighs where the stockings didn’t cover.  The way he squirmed was adorable, watching as those tight undies get spots of damp beads on the very tip.  _“So excited already~”_

 

Pulling the robe’s flaps up, he can see Yuuri’s, what he’s had wet dreams about for months, and it was sitting in his hand as he slowly began to stroke it, his tongue drags against the side gently.  Yuuri’s moan was broken, having someone else touch him was overwhelming and his shaking hands are gripping onto the sheets beneath him.  Victor smiles at this, starting to bob his head down onto his lap with a steady rhythm, those blue eyes just adored watching him writhe.  And the _sounds_ he was making, they were addictive to listen to.  The twitching was even adorable, and Yuuri’s hands pat onto Victor’s arms that rest on his hips, gasping a bit, “S-Stop! Stop!”

 

Eyes widening, he pulls himself off Yuuri, looking at him with a concerned look in his eyes.  “I-I’m…I’m sorry, I’m really sensitive, I got a little…”

 

 _“Oh, what a relief, he’s just sensitive…”_ Their fingers meet and tangle up in a comforting squeeze. “Heh…yes, it’s a little overwhelming, isn’t it?”  He kisses his lover’s stomach, then his chest, “Why don’t I let you rest a minute? Or perhaps you’d like to explore what you’re doing? What do you want to do for our first time?”

 

Yuuri sits up a little more, looking up to Victor who gets comfortable against some pillows on the bed.  Yet he doesn’t have to wait long in his seat, Yuuri’s soon against him, kissing his neck and biting his shoulders, where they could hide those marks.  “O-Oooh, someone’s hungry~ Does my little _Vitenka_ want to leave little love bites?”

 

Yuuri’s hand gently starts fondling him, trying to eagerly see he’s nourishing his suitor, watching him twitch, feeling the precum on his fingers that string from his loose fist grasp the throbbing member.  “Do you want to be inside me, Vitya?”  Yuuri mewls against him, yet Victor was quite astonished.

 

“Yuuri, are you…are you sure?  It’s not what porn says it is, there’s a lot of pain involved!”

 

Oh.  Victor assumed this would be the first time he would have put something up there.  That’s cute.  If there was anyone who knew about his sex life, (not counting the drunk nights with Phichit and himself talking way too openly) they would know he’s got a collection of dildos.  Not a giant one, but a definite collection.

 

He sits up, on his knees as he looks to the rambler. “Victor.”

 

“And I’ll have to stretch you! It’ll take a while, I’m girthy…” Victor stammers on, for once, their roles are changed.  “If you want I can bottom this time, I’ve been on both sides for years.”

 

Yuuri sits up, turning halfway to reach the handle of the glass plug he’d toyed with earlier, gently drawing it out with a grunt, a string of lube between his entrance and the toy.  The pair of blue eyes follows it, then looks to the sultry grin of his partner.  “…Still worried, Vitya~?”

 

 _“Why the fuck did he choose a Katsudon bowl to source this eros again?”_   Victor leers with a new dangerous grin on his face, “I’m so proud of you, for being so irresistibly sinful~ I might not be able to control myself~”

 

Yuuri grins, the more Victor plays with him, the more contented he gets to be bolder, and he pulls him in for a deep kiss, the Russian’s hand slides down to pull apart his cheeks, playing with his entrance gently.  “how do you want to do this, Victor?” He wiggles his hips a bit, taunted.

 

“Well, you look so damn good, I want to see your face while I fill you~” Yuuri smiles at that, “But doing this on my lap will definitely be difficult, why don’t you lay on your back and let me take care of you?”

 

The Japanese man blinks, wishing he himself can do more than just lay here, “A-Are you sure?”

 

“Believe me, when someone else is doing this, there’s not much you can do, Yuuri.”  Leaning over, there’s a twinkle in his eyes, “You were overwhelmed when I was just blowing you~” He picks up the bottle of lube that was set against the clock earlier, he’d eyed it earlier during their handiwork.  “lay back, get a pillow, get comfortable, my love~”

 

The Russian gently gets himself ready, gazing to his partner endearingly as he removes the robe and lays down, facing him.  For precaution, eh slicks up two fingers, the sight of it enough to send a blush overcoming to the current sub’s cheeks.  “Relax~ Let me know if you need me to stop, okay?”

 

Yuuri nods, shuddering as a finger slips into him, gently toying with his sensitive prostate; wow, it feels different with someone else fingering.  Not only could they go deeper, but they can move.  The free movements as another soon joins it after a minute is satisfying in a way he hadn’t thought of before, always fantasizing about the sex, not the foreplay.  The way they curled made him gasp, his back arching as he reacts to the new feeling of someone else, someone experienced, wanting to pleasure him.

 

“Hohoho~” Victor purrs, observing him, “Getting close, are you?” He eyes his lover’s tip that drips softly of little white pearls.

 

Through clenched teeth and a hiss of air, he makes out, “Y-You’re teasing me now!” He whines, his brown eyes rolling at the gentle lashes within him.  “J-Just fuck me…”

 

Victor wants to say something silly, something to make him less tense, but he’s distracted by the way this young man moans for him, it was irresistible.  He pulls his fingers out, taking hold of his hips as the coach lines himself up, gently rubbing against his stretched hole.  “it’s hard to resist ravishing you~” He chuckles, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

 

Victor presses forward, despite the stretching, he can only take a deep breath at how tight he was.  Passing his girth slowly in, the fleshy ring of muscle squeezed around him, as he can sense his anxious partner trying to relax, yet he looks almost relieved to feel so full.  Using his supportive hands, he wraps them around his sides with his thumbs resting on the two nubs of nipples to toy with him.

 

“My goodness! What a face~ You’ve been thinking about this all day, haven’t you?” Yuuri isn’t even embarrassed, letting himself get used to this, Victor wasn’t kidding about girth, maybe he should have left the plug in longer.  His knowing partner delays for him, reaching a hand down to gently dip his finger in the precum from the leaking tip of his cock.  Bringing his fingers up to his lips, he licks at them, then bites his lower lip with a sultry grin.  “Mmnn~ Vkusno~”

 

There’s a huff of air from him when he sees that, smiling bright, “Y-You can move now.”  Yuuri will have to log that memory into his head, he’s really liking these Russian words murmured in the middle of sex, it might be one of his favorite things.  Victor’s hips pull back a little bit, only to grind back in what feels like deeper than before.  “A-Ahaaahhh~” He moans, his head pressing back against the pillow at that. 

 

“Such a good student of mine~ “He whispers as his slow thrusts deeply grind against the base of his trimmed silver hairs at the base of his cock, exactly how he seems to be enjoying.  His face was growing pink behind the curtain of silver hair, he’s starting to get a bit of a heavy breath as he presses against his darling’s body.  The way Yuuri seems to ache for him, his fingers digging into Victor’s hips to push into himself, it was almost desperate to feel him fully.  He goes a little bit faster against him, watching his face as he does so to see if there’s a reaction, and goodness, the face Yuuri makes as he grips onto his back, trying not to claw down his shoulders.  “My Yuuri, you like me going a bit harder?”

 

Yuuri’s hand slips onto his chest, nodding with a lingering creak of his voice, “D-Do….do you want me to play with you so-somehow?” He huffs as he feels the need to help Victor somehow, little does he know he’s pretty overawed himself. 

 

“My little Katsudon, you’re breathtaking~ All I need is to know you’re happy~ Though I don’t mind kisses~” Yuuri leans up once he knows this, and though the thrusting halts for a moment, Victor’s chest starts getting little kisses, so tenderly planted at his pecs, then at his collarbone.   His teeth gently nibble at his skin, and Victor sighs lovingly at it, “Oooohh, lovely~” He groans, letting himself slide deep within him, getting a moan and some jumbled sentence.  “Hmmm~ What was that?”

 

Yuuri’s head presses against his chest, and he looks up with his brown eyes sharpening onto his blue ones, “H-Harder~”

 

Victor has stopped functioning, hearing that moan, he smirks and pulls out, his hips slapping up against his.  “Da? Want me to wreck you?”  The Japanese man nods, eyes rolling gently, whispering that word again, it made him smile. 

 

The heave of their hips meeting was audible in the room, and it was heard in the way Yuuri clamps his hands down onto his shoulders again, and the way he cried, “Vitya~!” in a broken, beautiful moan.  It was like music to Victor’s ears, he wanted to keep hearing it, and he keeps thrusting, his eyes watching down to him, how he’s enjoying his first time more than any other first he’s been with.  Grunting against his lover, he tucks his arms under him for leverage.

 

Yuuri can’t help but want more, he’s absolutely lost as his ankles link around each other, wrapped on Victor’s hips as though it would help him go deeper.  This was unlike what he’d felt before when he was by himself, this was completely different from when he would be stripping and had his fantasies on the stage, he wants to say more and do more.  Yet the only thing he can find himself doing is to rake his fingers against his partner’s body with hefty breath.  Victor’s thrusts are feeling unsteady, his face is tensing up, his head bows against Yuuri’s chest, and he can feel a gentle throb between his cheeks, he is mumbling and moaning.

 

Not far behind, he squeaks, “V-Victor…I-I’m re-really close…” His hands pull up the Russian’s face to turn up at him, he looks him in the eyes and smiles, “I-I want you to cum first~ I want it in me~”

 

It was those words that threw him over the edge, the silver haired head shivers against his chest as he thrusts in deep, grinding against him, hot breaths would steam before his face if he were breathing any harder, yet all Yuuri can think is, _“how does this man look so beautiful even when he orgasms?”_

Feeling his body flared with a hot wave under his skin, he pants, looking down to Yuuri, who’s stroking himself still at the feeling of the heat within his gut.  He keeps grinding against him despite the sensitivity at his hips, trying to help him reach his own, Yuuri’s eyes roll as he feels the pressure building up in every inch of himself, until he’s painted his hand and Victor’s chest with white splatter that glistens in the sunlight peeking through the window.  The Russian looks proud to don the hot silk that has decorated him, even though he feels like the energy has been sucked out of him.  They’re a heap of sex that don’t know how to move after they’ve finished, just twitching and panting with overstimulated and worn out bodies. 

 

Yuuri begins laughing as he lays back against the pillow he was fucked against, shaking his head and rubbing his eyes, his partner blinks, wishing he could figure out what was so funny.  “Yuuri? What is it? Did I knock your brain around too much?”

 

“N-No!” He laughs, sitting up, “I just don’t know how I managed to do all that without being an embarrassed wreck!”

 

Victor snorts at that, “Now that I can’t answer, perhaps you’re just so in love with me, it’s melting away~” He leans down to nuzzle his nose against his pupil’s, then stands up to get cleaned up.  “I’ll get you a towel, you’ll need it.”

 

“I’ll hop in the shower.” He says and rolls over, getting up as well, though he’s a bit wobbly. “Woops, there I go…”

 

“Even better!”

 

 

 

Minako closes her hotel room behind her, her eyes were wide, her hands shaking with her purse and her key, the only two things she’d managed to grab.  Had she just…heard what she thinks she did?  Perhaps it came from the room on the left side of her, not the one with her friend’s son and his coach to her right.  Perhaps the room on the left with someone named ‘Victor’ in it, maybe it was all coincidence.   Yes, that was a logical explanation, there was someone in the left room getting railed and her young student was pure and sweet and certainly not giving her nightmares.

 

The dance instructor was not quite confident in all this, in fact, she’s hoping to dear god that it’s going to be a funny story she tells later.  Until she hears the door a few numbers down click shut, she meets eyes with Takeshi, who has the same fearful expression she was wearing, also somewhat nauseated.

 

“…Oh god” He gags, “….. You didn’t hear…. things….did you?”

 

She gulps and shakes her head, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”  Her voice cracks as she grips her keys, “I’m just going to go for a long walk with my car, SO I’LL BE OUT.”

 

He clears his throat, “RIGHT, I’LL BE GOING SOME OTHER DIRECTION THEN!”  They part in the hallway, the same ‘stay calm’ face as the other. 

 

This could get interesting.


	27. It was very nice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri keeps his promise in the free program, taking on Minami and showing his love on the ice for his dear coach. Though it's difficult to contain his feelings, Yuuri has to show it somehow, or he feels like he could burst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me FOREVER to get this chapter started because I started a new fanfiction for Phichit and Christophe called The Thai Prince, you can find it in my works. 
> 
> Don't worry though, I'm dedicating myself to posting chapters at the same time for both fics until completed, so I don't forget about them!

 

 

The arena was packed the same as it was yesterday, and Yuuri was refreshed and excited to get back on the ice, of course his nerves couldn’t catch up, so he was a mixture of happiness and anxiety.  It’s a lot better than depression and anxiety, but he’s not sure how to handle some of it. 

 

For Victor, he couldn’t be in more pain than he was now, unable to cuddle and kiss his lover and show him what he meant to him after all that time they’d spent in the hotel room with cuddling and naughty little thoughts.  If only he could, maybe he could ease those nerves and take care of him, though he’s not the best at helping with anxiety.  Victor was a fixer, and he couldn’t fix tensions, not the way Yuuri needed.

 

Today, his order has chosen him to be the last to skate, if only that had worked out the day before, he’d be a lot more confident in himself.  Today, Minami, that one challenger of his was to be going first.

 

As Yuuri stood before his coach, he looks out of it, he looks upset and nervous and about twelve shades of red as he tries to calm down.  _“Oh boy, he looks nervous, he can’t even make eye contact with his coach…”_   though he feels like this should be a good thing for their agreement, at the same time, he sees what he was like years ago.  Someone originally so excited to compete, only to end up like him; and he didn’t want this to happen to the poor kid.

 

Minami starts out to the middle of the rink where his skate will begin, and he looks down at his skates, there’s that accustomed gaze to the ice he is all too familiar with having before any competition.  _“No. He’s going to have something I didn’t have: my idol cheering me on.”_   He holds his hands up to his mouth, “HEY MINAMI! GOOD LUCK!” He calls.

 

The young teen’s eyes search the rink for the source of the voice, only to fall upon his idol cheering away at him, “…..AAAAAAHHHHHHH.” Woops, he may have broken him, the kid begins tearing up on his own skates at the sight of his idol supporting him, even in their own miniature competition.

 

As the jazzy music starts up, there the chicken nugget goes, his feet tapping along with the beat before he truly skates, the crowd jumping into it already.  It was impressive how this child had the charisma that threw experience out the window, it was as though the world loved him already.  His step sequence was like tap dancing, and as Yuuri hadn’t thought before how that would look on the ice, it certainly gave him ideas now. 

 

The second half of that skate began, and Yuuri knew it was time to stretch for his skate today; he puts in his headphones, gets himself to a nice quiet place, and begins to start limbering up his hips.

 

Victor stands up after hearing that cheer and seeing his lover disappear, that smile that appeared on his face was greater today than it was before, knowing that’s the most he could do for the young skater without him having a heart attack.  Perhaps his pupil learned something new today.

 

 

 

 

The three skaters before him had come and gone, doing their best with Minami cheering them on like his idol did for him; after today, he was going to be a cheerleader for all his competitors.  He was at the rink side the entire time, clapping and whooping like he was one of the coaches, and it was quite admirable for him to do so, putting his heart into this.  But the thumping of footsteps caught his ears as he turns his head, Yuuri Katsuki, his one inspiration on the rink, steps with an expression more determined than yesterday, and he felt his heart stop at the sight of it.  With every step of his blade guards, he strides in to take the attention even while the last skater is still waving to his fans.  He comes over beside Minami, and with a swing of his hand, gives a hearty slap to the shoulder to his competitor, albeit, quite rough.  Yet the young chicken nugget was ready to bust a leg just to contain himself.

 

Without making a big deal of it, he steps over to his coach, who takes his team jacket.  On the Japanese man’s costume, it was like a navy suit, embroidered with designs of beautiful small rhinestones, paisley designs of a wine color, and a cloth belt at his waist that was very corset-like, showing how much weight he’d lost for this event.  “I think this costume was the right choice,” Victor smiles and takes his coat, “It suits you perfectly-…. Oh! Yuuri! Your lips are chapped.”

 

Victor takes off his gloves and pulls out a round canister of balm, and gently with his fingers applies it to his pupil’s lips, smiling to him.  They pull in together for a hug endearingly.

 

Yuuri had made this program with his coach, with in mind what his skating career would represent, how he’d discovered parts of himself he didn’t know about before.  How he’d been so low, so lost and trying to find the next path for his life to go on to, and then his coach showed up, and he fell in love.  This was a love story on ice, one that couldn’t be portrayed in any better way than how he would move on the ice, it was a declaration that he was not sure would be good enough for his love.

 

Stepping onto the ice, Yuuri makes his way towards the center of the spotlight, he bows his head, his arms facing out, like he was presenting himself as a person.  _“Victor told me to be open with myself, and I intend to show the world what I’m made of.”_   As the piano began, he raises his hands up to his chin, like he was drinking in the sorrows of what he’d felt before this happiness came into his life.

 

Victor was his sunshine, his moonlight, and all the stars in the sky for him.  The sight of cherry blossoms over the river he’d grown up with and loved were no match to how he felt for the man who had taken apart the life they had known and put it together.  The way it felt to kiss him was the feeling of taking a deep breath after being underwater for so long, like he needed that person in his life to keep helping him.

 

Yet he knew these feelings were unable to be voiced, everything he would ever know would never amount to the adoration he felt every time he saw the silver hairs that bounced on his lover’s head, the blue eyes that greeted him in the morning,  the smell of his cologne in his sheets.  There was no end to the words he wanted to say to reach out to him, this was past idolizing, this was a man he had grown to fall for in an entirely new way. 

 

He loved the way their fingers felt tangled up together loosely when waking up in the dawn to the blaring alarm, how his lover would smile when he was annoyed and make a snide comment to express that, the long clumsy legs that barely seemed to know how many things they bumped into in a day, the way he would forget the biggest things, but remember the littlest details. 

 

Just the thought of it made him choke within his own chest as he glides along the ice, his combed back hair billowing gently on his head as he gets lost in the thoughts of how to show his love to the world.  He wanted to show it, he wanted everyone to know Victor was his, to feel the wrath of them all, but face it with the most beautiful man he’d ever been overjoyed to know.

 

The first jump was a quad triple combination, the only quad to be in this entire program thanks to Victor’s instructions, though he had other plans on his mind.  He wanted to show his coach how he’d improved, he wants to let him know the love he feels through his skating can’t be muffled by just scores, but by how he performs.  In the triple, it becomes a double, and Victor’s eyes widen at the motion.

 

_“I’m doing all three quads, and I’m going to get them for you.”_   He thinks, glancing over for just a split second to see the reaction, it doesn’t look happy, but surprised. _“Good, he loves being surprised.”_   Although he thinks deeply about how he’s skating, he looks stiff, he’s focusing too much on the upcoming jumps rather than the performance itself.  Exactly the opposite of what he needs to do.  As the triple Salchow comes up, Yuuri’s hand touches the ice to stay upright, getting right back to the skate.

 

_“Ah! Yuuri! Shake it off!”_   Victor bites his lip, clutching the little poodle case for the tissues he was holding, he might need a few after this.

 

Although he’s messing up his jumps, Victor can’t keep his eyes off his pupil, not because he wants to be sure he does well in the program, but because there’s something different about this than in practice.  Yuuri was not only enthralling the audience in this performance, but himself, giving himself completely into Victor’s choreography like it was his last declaration to the world.  Skaters don’t do things for no reason, they’re very sentimental, and that’s magnified with the skater Yuuri has always been.  This theme of love is larger than life, it takes hold of everyone in the room, it grasps at their souls and pulls them forward against the edge of their seat, shakes them from within.

 

This part of the skate is Yuuri finally understanding what love is, right before the second part is about to come up, and even though he looks tired, he’s got his head held high.  It suits him.  Tired, anxious, depressed, but so unbelievably in love, he could almost forget all the worse things about himself, if only for a moment.  The motions were romantic, they were dramatic, and as he clutched one hand to his chest, and then to his lips before swinging those arms out, he spins around.  The piano was getting faster and faster, his blades scraping down into the ice with his fervent step sequence and the love he held in his heart.

 

As Yuuri’s blades release themselves off the ice, he spins out of turn and goes facefirst into the side of an ad on the rink, causing a gasp from the audience and fellow skaters, yet he gets right back up and goes back to skating, a more determined face than before, despite the droplets of blood slowly dripping down his from his nose.  He goes on, because he needs to finish this as well as he can, he needs to display what he must the world with such a fervent passion, he barely notices the pain that throbs in his face. 

 

He spins, he twirls, he spreads himself across the ice like it’s his last time to move his own body to any music, and Victor can hear it all from where he is, every heartbeat that pounded within the man he loves.  It is then that Yuuri places a hand over his heart with his right, and with his left, reaches out to Victor, as though he’s claiming him from the world.

 

“……what the?” Victor gulps, his heart has stopped within his chest, he’s a young boy with a crush again, a child with flittering butterflies as he’s reached for on the ice. _“This….This is the perfect end to your skate.”_

 

Yet he stares, unable to process the perfection that was that imperfect routine, the way that his darling Yuuri had made the skate into, in that moment, they knew he had won this event ahead of every person in the room.  And the score that was lit up on that board above the ice confirmed it.

 

 

 

 

 

The drive home was far from quiet as the four discussed ways to celebrate, how Yuuri wanted to be sure he was still getting a pork cutlet bowl.  There’s no way in hell he’s going to go on a trip and not get one of those before he goes, he’s got the Cup of China to get to.  “Well, you youngins can go drinking, I didn’t sleep well due to some awful noises in the bedroom next to mine last night.” She grumps, wondering if they’ll get the hint.

 

The naïve pair are peeked at in the mirror as she drives, and they just get an expression of tense silence, shaking their heads.  “Really?” Takeshi glances over his shoulder, “I didn’t think they were awful, they sounded like they were having a lot of fun.”  The taunting is almost unbearable, like Victor can’t contain his laughter.

 

_“Well! I’ll have to distract them!”_  He turns to his lover, “Now Yuuri! How about you get your pork bowl for tomorrow at lunch, then we can go celebrate with drinks tonight?”  Victor jokes, nudging him.

 

Yet the hesitant agreement on Yuuri’s face makes him bust out in giggles, “What? I can last!”

 

“You really do love those pork bowls more than me, don’t you?” he giggles, then stops, covering his mouth.

 

The whole van is jerked forward by the halted brakes Minako slams her foot down on, the seatbelts pin them to the seats, and the horn of the car behind her blares as it swerves around her.  She puts the car in park, unbuckles her seatbelt, and turns around with an indescribable look on her face, “……. WHAT’S THIS I’M HEARING ABOUT LOVE BACK HERE, KATSUKI?”

 

For the first time, Takeshi is certain, he’s seeing Victor somewhat terrified of a person, as he seems to tug at the belt around his waist to escape the car somehow while Yuuri stammers on, trying to explain.  “Minako, Minako! Calm down! Please!”

 

“I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE JUST FUCKING, YOU’RE IN LOVE?”

 

 

Victor finally unbuckles and he turns to Yuuri, “Is your neck okay? Those brakes went pretty hard…do you have whiplash?” He asks, making sure his student was alright.

 

 

The embarrassment burned like boiling water starting from his chest and pouring all the way down into his toes, he’s red all over, he covers his face, “Minako, please! I’m……. We weren’t…. ready to tell anyone yet, please, both of you…” He pleads from behind his hands, looking over to Victor with a frown.  “We just…. We started dating about two months ago, we’ve been hiding it from the family.”

 

“Do they know about…. the whole thing?” Takeshi blinks, he turns in his seat as well, Yuuri nods gently.  “You came out! Oh, my god, I’m so glad for you! Your parents obviously took it well then! They’re still as loving as ever!”  

 

Once Victor finishes making sure his boyfriend is feeling alright, he takes his hand, “And…we would greatly appreciate you keep it down from anyone, not only the sexuality bit…but the dating bit as well.” Though it was necessary to talk about, he still sounds somewhat sad about it, “Neither one of us are ready for this to hurt chances with the Grand Prix Final, in case of any bigoted judges or fans.”

 

Minako climbs into the back, pulling both of them into a hug that could crush a man’s skull.  “Oooohhh! I can’t believe it, Yuuri’s finally feeling love! I’m gonna scream!”

 

“You already are! In our ears!” Yuuri struggles as he’s hugged in one arm and his lover the next, “J-Just please! Promise us you’ll make sure nobody else knows for now?”

 

Takeshi laughs, “You can count on me, Yuuri.  I knew there was something going on between you two, I just wanted to make sure my childhood friend had someone who could take care of him!”  Shaking his head, he points to Victor, “Yeah, you watch yourself, Nikiforov!” He laughs beside them.

 

Yuuri sighs and squeezes victor’s hand, looking between them all, _“Gosh…being able to be open around someone is….really nice.”_   He leans his head into the taller one’s shoulder, his glasses nudged to be crooked as he does so, the drive beginning once more back home. _“I wish I could be open about it with everyone, so we didn’t have to hide it all.”_


	28. Cup of China's arrival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A long chapter, Yuuri and Victor pack up and arrive in their destination, and though it's been planned out to every detail, day one of being there ends up being quite adventurous. And not the way they had planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOOOO, SUCH A LONG CHAPTER. And I have many more coming. For now, though. I'll be working on my other fanfiction, The Thai Prince!

Within the next three weeks, packing everything carefully for their trip to the Cup of China competition was already figured out ahead of the trip, and they’d taken meticulous care of how their next few weeks were going to be in hotels and between each competition.

 

For now, though, Victor awakens on the shoulder of the young Japanese man, a small pain in his back.  _“ugh…these damn coach seats…._ ”  Being used to first class was difficult to switch off, yet he knew that’s what his Yuuri always chose.  Most of his reserves went into paying off the remaining college debt he finally got rid of the last competition he’d won in the GP series, and then into his parent’s spring to be sure it had an emergency fund in case of economic hardship.  He’s quite frugal despite the amount he has saved up.  Although his coach offered to upgrade seats for them, the shy man seemed uncomfortable sitting in the ‘important people’ section, as he had put it.

 

Yuuri looks over to his boyfriend with a smile, “Hey! Good morning!” He chuckles, “You woke up just in time, we just landed.”  The coach sits up straight, noticing people were getting their things gathered to leave.

 

“Oh good! We can move!”  He manages to yawn out, getting his phone and headphones out from the pocket in front of him.  “Did you sleep any? You tossed around all night last night and then we had to get up at four.”

 

The skater shakes his head, “Nah, I can’t sleep on planes, I’ll get a better night’s sleep tonight before our warmup tomorrow.”

 

It was concerning that his apprentice was so bad at sleeping, something very much required to function not only as an athlete, but a human being.  He had voiced possible sleep aids in the past, yet competitions on drugs can make one groggy for days on end.  _“Maybe some drinks before bed would help tonight…”_

 

Shuffling off the plane, they go off to retrieve their other luggage, Yuuri had brought his costumes in carry-on for precaution, which ended up being a good idea, for his suitcase at luggage could not be found.  There’s a few laps around the belt, searching tag after tag, trying to locate the lost bag.  Victor even gets to one of the employees to try to locate the bag ticket they had, and it has not come with them to China, it seems it’s gone to Canada.

 

“SERIOUSLY?” Yuuri whines, “I had my charger and my clothes and everything in there! Augh, I can’t believe this….” He hopes this isn’t an indicator for how the rest of this trip would be.

 

“It’s okay! It’s okay!”  The coach turns, taking his shoulders in his hands to diffuse this circumstances.  “It’s okay, Yuuri, we can go shopping and then if you need more clothes, you can wear some of mine! Heaven knows I brought way too many shirts, okay?”  Yuuri snuffles and shakes his head, “Hey, hey, we’ll have them ship the bag back since it was their fault for sending it elsewhere.  There’s a solution for this.”

 

Yuuri exhales from his breath, “Well…I need some pants, but I won’t mind borrowing a shirt…and I can ask Phichit if I can use some of his spares, he’s always got extra just in case, we’re the same size.”  He rubs the bridge of his nose with his forefingers. “Okay, okay…let’s get them to send the bag back here, and then we’ll go from there.”

 

Victor smiles, leaning over to hug him, “There! A solution!” His head lowers to his right ear, a devilish smile on his cheeks, “You’ll be wearing boyfriend clothes~” Though he can barely cover his enthusiasm with saying it.  His shorter lover buries his face into his jacket bashfully.  “Come on then! We’ll drop our things off at the hotel room, and then we’ve got shopping to do.”

 

There’s a reluctant nod, and the skater takes his carry-on bag by the strap, a little frustrated he should go shopping. At least he had some money saved up, and due to previous competitions, he knows how to navigate this area.

 

Dipping into his savings was not what he liked to do often, in case of emergency situations or medical bills.

 

Shopping did not go as quickly as planned, or at least as quickly as Yuuri planned.  Victor points at shops with expensive clothes, wanting to see his lovely boyfriend in linen shirts, each of which cost more than the single suit the Japanese man owned.  He’s sure if he looks into this window any further, there might be a fee.  “Yuuuuuuurrriiii!” The Russian whines, “At least let me buy you one, your birthday isn’t that far away, and you haven’t asked for anything!”

 

“V-Victor! That costs more than I feel comfortable with!”  He’s blushing, worried about a dozen things of course.  What if he gained weight and it didn’t fit anymore? What if he has to get it cleaned at some faraway place because he can’t wash it in the machine?  **What if it shrinks?**

 

“Listen, Yuuri, which one of us has won nearly every competition he competed in since he was 15?”  Well, that didn’t feel great to hear, Yuuri had lost to him multiple times before, and that didn’t make him feel more confident.

 

“…You.”  He says with an annoyed tone.

 

“Which makes me rich!  What are you so worried about?”

 

Yuuri groans, looking up to him, “Well, I can’t afford to treat you to these nice gifts, when your birthday comes around, I won’t know what to get you!”

 

Whoops, Victor didn’t think that far ahead, and he smiles as his hands place on his lover’s shoulders.  “…Alright, alright, I’ll get you something else…but just know, all I want in life, I’ve already got.” He turns to his shorter partner, his fingers slide down his arms and tangle into his own, squeezing them endearingly.  “I have you~”

 

Yuuri is aglow at the corniest line in existance, and he’s ashamed by how well it worked on him.  “You’re too handsome, you know that, right?”  He mumbles, their eyes deeply lost in each other, drinking in the moment of sweet romance that was stumbled upon.  There’s some giggling that interrupts the moment, and Victor’s hands tug away to put in his pockets as they turn around, some fellow shoppers just looking at their phones on the other side of the sidewalks.  The passing of these two ladies, that was the mighty power that kept these two lovers from expressing their adoration.

 

Something that miniscule dictated how much he showed his love for Victor, and it ached within him to know this.  What he envied of straight couples was the ability to be open if they decided without this pain he felt filling his chest.

 

Victor turns back, seeing the look on his lover’s face as his hands are pulled away, and he watches the shoppers pass out of sight. _“My dear Yuuri…”_ He frowns, but there was no way to comfort him in the way that makes him the happiest.  “Yuuri, where did you want to shop for your clothes? We can get those and go back to the hotel, okay?”

 

The black-haired head picks up as he hears his boyfriend talking, then nods gently as he starts leading them down the sidewalk.  “Right, sorry.”

 

_“…. He’s apologizing for no reason again, he’s upset at me…or maybe he’s nervous…”_   He follows quietly as the young man looks around at the signs, seeing which ones he recognizes from his previous trips. _“I wish I could give him what he wants, to be openly in love…I’m even nervous about telling my own family.  Yet my boyfriend, the man that I love, he’s expressed his honest self to everyone he loves now….and I’ve hypocritically kept myself so closed.”_

 

They turn into a regular retail store, “Here, this is the place I remember.”  Yuuri walks in, grabbing a basket and walking straight over to the men’s clothes.  Victor blinks as he scans the room, the price signs sitting on the clothing racks.  They’re so…..tiny.  Yuuri has disappeared from his side to go to the shirt racks, going through to find a formal shirt, and a few casual, as well as some pants. _“I know Victor wants us to stay quiet for now…and I’m more than willing to respect that….so why do I feel so guilty for being his?  Do I make him happy?  How will I even know?”_

 

Yuuri ended up finding some nice shirts, a few dark button downs, and some athletic pants and a shirt to work out in.  Victor has bought a few sweaters he knows his lover will like, and is quite impressed when he finds out how absolutely cheap everything turned out.  “Look at you~ Teaching me how to shop~” He jokes, which manages to crack a smile.  “We’ll pack everything in my suitcases on our next trip, okay?”

 

There’s that smile he knows and loves, “Okay, I’m sorry for being so frustrated before.  It wasn’t how I wanted our trip to start…why don’t we head back to the hotel?”  There’s a nod between them as they start out to go get a taxi.

 

 

 

Christophe is in the lobby of the hotel, pacing near the front desk with anticipation in his chest, he must have memorized twelve different love poems today alone on his plane ride in.  His coach even offered some advice before parting to his own room, yet he was still nervous.  He was just in time for seeing the other secret couple walk into the front desk area with shopping bags galore.  “Oh! Hey Chris!” Yuuri waves with a smile, yet that returned grin is hardly gleeful.

 

“Hey, you two….Have you seen Phichit?”

 

_“Wow, he looks nervous, I wonder what’s going on…”_

 

“Yuuri and I just got in, has he posted anything on twitter or Instagram?” Victor pulls out his phone, “I thought he’d be here before any of us.”

 

Chris sighs, looking like he needed to pace, he adjusts his cable knit cardigan wearing a dress shirt beneath it, and he was searching the room for his lover, patting his inner pocket to make sure his notecards were in there.  The Japanese man stares at him, looking at his movements. _“He’s dressed up…he’s looking for phichit…he’s nervous….is he….? OOOHHHHHH…”_   He wants to squeal with excitement, “Chris, what’s going on?”

 

He sighs and looks around, “I can’t say out here.” He looks over at the doors at the new guests coming in, none of them were his Thai skater.

 

Victor raises an eyebrow at the excited hop his boyfriend seems to have in his step, it’s cute as can be.  “Any way we can help?”

 

“…Actually, yes.  I don’t want to seem suspicious, but I really want to know where he is.”  Chris answers, looking down at a notecard he pulls from his side pocket.  “Yuuri, do you think you can call him, ask where he is?”  Only the face he’s met with is suspicious. “…. You’re staring at me in an odd way, is this your messed-up way of asking for a threesome?  Or a foursome?”

 

“Are you…” He leans in to whisper, “Proposing?”

 

The red face that replaces the Swiss man’s cheeks his nearly hysterical, and he shakes his head with the reaction, “No! No! Definitely not!” 

 

Yuuri looks a bit confused, looking over at Victor who has now burst into laughter, obviously, he must know now.  “Then what’s going on? You look like you’re doing something suspicious now!”  His boyfriend leans in to whisper, explaining the situation.  “…..OH wow, I overshot that!” He snickers, covering his mouth to try to hide how funny his friend’s distress really was.”

 

“It’s too bad, I do love a good wedding~” Mumbles the coach, who joins in on the laughter, they have to lean on each other momentarily.

 

Chris Groans and tucks his card back into his pocket, crossing his arms now and popping his hip out, “You two, I’m nervous enough as it is!” The grumbling doesn’t cease as the pair keep on their giggle fest.

 

“Just imagine, Yuuri.”  Victor suppresses a snort, “When he is going to pop the question, how nervous he’ll be!” It turns into wheezing, trying not to cause a scene in the corner. 

 

“Yuuri! Can you call him? Please?” After they get it together, down to some tired chuckles and some out of breath tear wiping, Yuuri pulls out his phone to get his best friend on the line.

 

Soon, Phichit’s voice is heard from the speaker, “Yuuri!” The tired voice calls, “Boy am I glad to hear from you…”

 

“Hey! Where are you? I thought you’d be here by now!” Yuuri sees a bit of relief in the Swiss man’s face as he knows his boyfriend had picked up the phone.

 

“I’m still at the airport, my flight got delayed on top of a million other things…I swear, this day’s out to get me.”  That’s a bit concerning, it was hard to get Phichit in a bad mood, especially when he’s had such a good practice this year.

 

“What is it?” Victor whispers.

 

He looks to the pair and shushes them silently with a finger to his lips as he presses the speaker to his ear and plugs the other to hear better, “Bad day?”  The two men beside him look curiously at each other.

 

“Like you wouldn’t believe!  I left last night, hoping to get here first so I could wake up at my own pace and not have to deal with all this travel crap.  Not only was my ticket stolen from my bag, but the new one I bought had to be four hours ahead of where I was, and Coach still had his, so he went ahead without me. Which isn’t his fault, I told him to.”  There’s a grimace on his face, which means that Coach Celestino was probably in the hotel, and would try to reconnect with Yuuri and some other students.  “And then, all the food places were packed or out of supplies, so I haven’t eaten in HOURS.”

 

The more Yuuri winced, the more nervous Christophe began to look, he can hear from a distance how his lover was in despair.  Victor tries to listen in himself, being impatient.  “Oh boy, so you haven’t eaten either?”

 

“No!” Phichit groans into the phone, “So I get on the flight, and I’m crammed right next to the bathroom in some broken and busted up chair, and they upgrade the guy sitting next to me who has been sitting on me most of the flight, and he gets to first class while I’m still sitting in the broken chair!  No big deal, I try to get some sleep, I barely get any.  I get to the airport, and apparently, my luggage got temporarily lost and came in on a different plane that was supposed to arrive three hours after I landed, and it has all my stuff in there so I can’t really go anywhere!”

 

“Christ, Phichit! Did you get it?”

 

“Eventually, and now I’ve been waiting for my taxi that I called for to pick me up, one that won’t make stops for everyone else, and they’re an hour late!  And to top it all off, I’m 100% certain that Chris is going to break up with me when we talk at the hotel, and I’m not sure if I can handle that.” His voice chokes over the speaker.

 

“Phich.” He frowns, “Listen to me, okay? Breathe, take a deep breath with me….” He says into the speaker, not having known himself to give his best friend this pep talk, it’s always been the other way around.  “I’m going to call Celestino to pick you up with the rental car that Victor and I got.  It won’t take long.  If he can’t do it, then I’ll personally come get you.”

 

Phichit starts calming down on the phone just a little bit, “A-Are you sure, Yuuri? It’s like a forty-minute drive, and I’m sure you’re tired from your flight.”

 

“Hey, I’m your best friend, I’ll try to see if I can pick up some food too.  What are you in the mood for?”

 

“Yu-“

 

“No, no, what are you in the mood for? I’ll get it on the way.”

 

 

Christophe covers his face with his hands, he’s absolute, this was going so well planned so far, but then here comes a snag that could tear all of it apart.  After a few moments of talking where exactly they would meet, Yuuri hangs up and turns to them.

 

So desperately, he wanted to tell him it would get better, but he has to hold his tongue for the sake of his competitor and friend, Christophe.  He shudders and turns to them.  “He’s have a really bad day…also, he thinks you’re going to break up with him, and he’s going to probably do some binge drinking.”

 

Victor grimaces, “You may need to actually propose, Chris~” He tries to joke, only to receive a whack on the shoulder.

 

“Oh boy, I have to step it up…” He looks to Yuuri, “So you’re probably going to pick him up then, Celestino is off for a press conference until about four.  Victor? Will you help me? I want to make this more special than I planned, flowers, balloons, all of it.”

 

Victor beams, “I would love to!  Yuuri, before you leave, will you tell us all the things he likes most?  Favorite flowers, drinks, maybe a favorite color?”

 

Yuuri chuckles, shaking his head, “Christophe knows it all, I’m sure… I’ll be back in a little more than an hour, okay?”

 

His lover gives him the keys, and a squeeze in the hand.  “We’ll be here, my love~ Be careful.”

 

“I will!”

 

 

 

Christophe and Victor have run to the nearest flower shop to find Damask Roses, luckily, they found one open, and are currently waiting on quite a large order of the beautiful flowers, as well as some petals so the Swiss man can spread it around the room.  Meanwhile, they walk around and see if there’s any balloons to be able to contribute to this love fest, Chris particularly looking at some plushies, seeing if there’s any hamsters in there.  “So, how are you and your lovebug doing?”  He asks as he searches.  “You seemed tired coming into the hotel.”

 

Victor is picking up some baby’s breath flowers to go along with the roses, “Ah, yes, Yuuri’s luggage got sent to Canada, so we had to go shopping for some clothes, I may have overwhelmed him with my expensive taste~” He chuckles, picking up some ribbons to go along with everything. 

 

“Oh?  What, were you trying to buy a shirt made from caviar or something?” He laughs, picking up a cute little hamster balloon instead of a plush, this would do much nicer.  “Or were you trying to dress him to your liking?”

 

“I do admit, some of the clothes Yuuri wears don’t suit him.  I’d love to treat him to some nice shirts and pants, but he seems satisfied wearing the leggings and old shirts, which if he’s comfortable, I’m not one to judge.”  He shrugs, “I’ll have to buy him something nice for his birthday at least, it’s at the end of November.” 

 

Christophe decides to throw back a bit of the medicine dished out to him earlier with a snide smirk, “Perhaps there was a hint back in the lobby when he thought I was proposing~” 

 

Victor bursts into laughter, looking over to him with a coy look in his eyes. “You underestimate how shy my dear Yuuri is… Imagine him being the one to make that move~ But he’s too timid!”  His sigh a finale to that chuckle, he turns his head, “I’d put him down for a solid maybe~”

 

“Wait, you’ve been dating for like three ish months….and you’d already say yes? Just like that?” Chris glares over, unsure if he’s pulling his leg.  Yet Victor’s a hard one to read sometimes, especially as he holds all this lovey dovey merchandise meant to decorate the rooms.

 

The Russian smiles, twirling a bit as he holds the baby’s breath, “I said ‘maybe’, Christophe, I’ve known my love for Yuuri for a long time~ But my little piggy will talk to me about that when he’s ready.  Nice try though~”

 

 

 

 

Phichit’s stomach was rumbling like crazy as he stood out on the sidewalk, looking both ways to see if the rental car described to him would be pulling up at all, he danced in place with his suitcase frustratingly.  Of all days for him to be stuck in airports all night long and most of the morning, today had to be it.  When the blue car pulls up, he couldn’t look more relieved, running up to the door, he peeks in to see that familiar face.  “Ah! Yuuri! You made it!”

 

He opens the door and plops in, immediately handed a wide mouth cup with a lid, “I brought kelp noodles, it was the closest thing I could get to that one recipe you made all the time when we were roomies.  I asked them to put peanuts in it if that’s alright.” He nods excitedly.

 

“You have no idea how much better my day became because you called, Yuuri…” He sighs and starts eating immediately.

 

Yuuri nods and starts the drive back towards the hotel’s route, letting his friend get some food in him before they start talking.  “So it’s official, all my closest friends and family know about Victor and I.  I’m so glad I followed your footsteps to be able to talk about it, it’s a lot smaller of a deal to me now that I’ve done it.”

 

With a full mouth, he’s answered with, “Yuuri, that’s awesome! Any negative talk?”

 

There’s a gentle shrug, “I mean, some of the talk sounds like they’re worried they’ll offend us.  Or I’ve heard a lot of ‘is this what made you gay?’ questions and things like that.  It’s been a little weird, but I can handle it.  I expect it out of my parents after all, I think I’m their first gay person they’ve ever talked to.”  He glances over to his pal who wipes his mouth with a napkin.  “How about you? Anyone giving you crap for it?”

 

Phichit sighs and looks out the window a moment, “My cousins are pretty mean about it, saying it’s why I haven’t won gold before.”

 

“Ouch.”  He winces at that, “how do you respond usually?”

 

The Thai skater plugs in his phone and looks to the screen, “Oh, emotional blackmail of photos of them doing things they shouldn’t be doing, no big.”  The words spilled from him without a hesitation, without a hindrance to his emotions, as though he’d done this many times before.

 

Oh, right, Yuuri forgot about the power his best friend held over anyone he’d ever met, he’s even sure he’s on the list if he ever acts out of line towards him, as he’s documented every event he’s ever attended.  Maybe he should be a little more careful during competitions. “So!” He changes the subject, “I heard you got the rights to do the ‘Shall we Skate’ routine!  I can’t wait to see it!  You’ve been talking about doing it for years now, what finally got you to do it?”

 

There was the glow he had, that knowing friend talk of what he loved and what his aspirations are.  “Well, Christophe helped me figure it out, sent me some advice on my routine and how to make it my own and I got inspired to finally make it this year.”

 

“That’s great! I expect you to be a challenge, Phichit.” He jokes, getting a bit of a laugh from his old roomie, he wanted to make him feel positive on the way back to the hotel, especially if he was planning on getting to his room in a storming rage.

 

 

Getting onto the floor they were assigned, Phichit looks like he doesn’t want to step off the elevator, he knows going into his room is one step closer to that serious talk.  “I need a bath…” He rubs his eyes, the weary young man is exhausted with the day, and he longed for it to end this second.

 

Yuuri picks up the suitcase behind him and starts walking out in hopes his friend will follow after, luckily that works.  “You’re room 407, just a across the hall from my room.  If you need me, just knock.”  There’s only a nod as they stop at the correct door, he hands over the key to his best friend, exhausted.  “Hey, you’ll be alright.”

 

“I hope so.” He replies, without indication, he swoops in for a hug, Yuuri tries to show as much support as he could.  “Get the strong stuff ready, I’m going to get trashed tonight.”

 

Letting go, he unlocks the door, and opens it up.  Phichit turns to roll his suitcase in, when he’s stopped in place at the sight of a trail of petals, lit with scattered candles into the room that was aglow with a dim golden shine everywhere.  Tea lights sat flickering around ribbon tied bouquets, scattered long step flowers, plush with life, and in the middle, Christophe was sitting on the bed, looking up to the door with his hazel eyes wide at his boyfriend.  Standing up quickly, he gulps and adjusts his cardigan, looking more vulnerable than he’s used to ever see.  “I know.”  His accent choked, “You hate me so much right now. And you have every right to after I’ve avoided you these past few weeks.  But I couldn’t say this over the phone, or on skype, and it ached in me not to be able to be beside you.”

 

Phichit drops his suitcase beside him, and he takes his scarf and jacket off.  “Chris…” He begins, starting to rub his temples.  “If you don’t want to be around me, why would you set up all of this? To make it feel better?” He’s choking up himself, just wanting everything to end.  “It’s bad enough that you made me go through weeks of grueling waiting so you could do it in person, at this point, you could have just done it over the phone and let me mourn before the competition. BUT NO! YOU-…”

 

“Phichit, I love you.”  Chris talks over him, not caring on the volume so long as he gets heard.  “I’m _in_ love with you.  I can’t hold it in any longer.”  The Thai skater gasps as he’s interrupted.  “I’m so sorry I’ve made you wait so long to hear it! I’ve written poem after poem trying to figure out how to say it and I…”  The poems sitting in his hand as he trembles to pull them out drop to the ground at the full force of his lover’s body colliding into his in an embrace, Phichit’s face digging into his shirt, shoulders shuddering as he starts choking up.

 

There was the burning happiness, the sunlight of his life that made his days well again, that he daydreamed of in the moments he had alone.  Christophe’s smile hides into the soft black hair of the whimpering mess he’s fallen for, and his strong arms hold him close to savor every second he’d missed of his beloved.

 

Yuuri decides the rest should be behind closed doors, and he slowly pulls on the handle until he hears the lock click.  _“That was the most stressful moment I think I’ve ever seen Phichit in, or rather…. moments, it was a few weeks after all.”_  

 

Phichit had been through heartache before, which would turn that wonderful beaming personality into a painful storm that forgot how to function.  His competitor and best friend was going to be so much better now, after thinking the worst, the best was the result.  His heart has melted at the thought, and he turns to his door, trying to figure out which he wanted to get dressed in: Pajamas or pantsless.  Opening the door to rest up, he finds…. a similar situation to the room across the hall, the roses filled up one of the beds, the other clean and made.

 

“…Victor?” About to step in, he can hear music, _Stammi Vicino_ , stay with me, it as Victor’s old program music.  It was the song that brought them together.

 

Peeking around the corner after closing the door, Victor is holding one of the roses that isn’t tied in a ribbon on the bed, nor scattered on the floor, couch, and blankets.  He beams and holds a hand out to him.  “I know it’s not out in public, and I know it’s not declaring it to the planet…but you’re my entire world, and all my stars, and the galaxies and all that exists.”  Yuuri must be holding his breath, as the Russian stroking his cheek, “And I would give my every living breath to you if it meant you were happy…”

 

There’s a chuckle that breaks his breath holding, “I don’t know how I got so lucky to find you in life…”  He catches up with his words, setting his hands on his hips, and pulling the silver haired man in closer.

 

Victor’s breath makes that gentle huff that’s heard when he smiles, “It wasn’t luck, you got here being my wonderful Yuuri.  My Yuuri~” 

 

They slowly sway to the music a while, being against each other seemed to melt away the jet lag, the shopping frustration, the stress of their friend’s relationship.  The rest of existence could disappear and they would be happy with the little steps they make to their song, and the sound of the smiling chuckles between them.

 

 


	29. Deep feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How each person handles their feelings is going to become a great challenge for coach and student.

Warm up practice was more like public skating back home in Japan, when the ice was open and children were running around and falling on the ice, except this time it was the press.  Every branch of journalism Yuuri was aware of was present, and each skater was taking the opportunity to get the publicity.  The group of skaters who kept leaping into jumps were taking up quite a bit of room for those, and it was smart to stay out of their ways when they did so. 

 

Victor was on the sidelines, prowling for which competitors would be the biggest feat to beat, inspecting them more carefully than he let on.

 

Tomorrow was going to be crucial for Beijing to see what they’re made of, but relaxing was just as important as getting practice in.  The coach was aware and wanted to be sure Yuuri knew that.  After the nerves from the last competition, it was apparent he needed to find a way to relax or cope with his anxiety in a healthier way than just closing himself off and overthinking.  As his lover started to exit the ice, he had open arms.  “Yuuri! We’re going out for hotpot, and it’s on me!”  He winks, asking his sweet boyfriend out as casually as possible.

 

Yuuri blinks and leans down to put the blade guards on.  “Well, hold on…. I have to do some interviews before we do anything, I don’t want to be rude to everyone who’s been so patiently waiting for us.” There were some chuckles of people in professional clothes, cameras, and recorders ready to talk.  He walks over with a smile, taking after his coach’s words.  “Hello, everyone!  How are you all?” There’s a few mumbles and polite bows as they mumble pleasantly back to him.  “I trust you’ll all enjoy the competition; I have some great competitors to go against.”

 

“You’ll be going against some close friends; how does that make you feel?”  One young woman asks.

 

The Japanese man smiles warmly, “Well, I think they’re all my friends in a way, but when we’re leaving the ice rink, we also leave the rivalry there.  Phichit Chulanont is my best friend, and I have faith he’ll do great on his own.”

 

That was a great way for him to add in how he hoped competitors would do well, and it kept the angst of press from twisting his words.  “Are you at all nervous about your programs?”

 

“To say any skater doesn’t have some form of nervousness before a big show like this one is assuming this is easy.  All of us can get scared in a way.”

 

Victor was happy with that answer, it allowed Yuuri the comfort of stating his feelings and how relative it was to everyone else he rivals.  He’s glad for it, the press didn’t need to know about his anxiety. _“He doesn’t need my help with these questions, my dear Yuuri has this under control~”_

 

He lets the questions fly about, looking between reporters, letting his mind wander a bit.  Yet, speaking of skaters, a familiar pair of faces come into his view.  Yakov Feltsman and Georgi Popovich, his father figure and brotherly rink mate.  “…Yuuri, I’m hungry, let’s go for hotpot.” He nudges, interrupting a question and grabbing his wrist.

 

“B-But I’m in the middle of an interview!”  He’s yanked away before he can even finish his sentence.  “Sorry! I’ll answer your questions later!”

 

They run down an alcove and then into a hallway beside the stands, “Yuuri! Yakov and Georgi are here, I just saw them, I’ve missed them so much. Can we invite them out to dinner with us?”  That tone in his voice was like a child going to see their favorite Disney character, so precious and eager.  Once they rush around the corner, the pair can be seen from behind.  “Yakov! Georgi!” He calls, “Yuuri and I are about to go for hotpot, please join us, I have so much to tell you!”

 

Georgi stops in his steps, glancing his shoulder to give sad eyes, they stab directly into the gaze of his rink mate, before looking down to his feet.  The old coach however, is not as gentle with any gesture, and he shoots a frustrated wrinkled glance.  “What, so you can show me how you’re playing coach?”  He doesn’t even fully commit to turning around, he just snarls out, “Don’t talk to me, come back when you want me to salvage what career you might have after you throw this student away, what may have been your sixth gold medal.  You make Russia sick.”

 

The expression may not have been seen where Yuuri stands, but the way those words bit the air with sharp teeth made him shake within. _“I would be in tears…that was his old coach? What happened to those stories about Victor’s ‘ice family’?”_   He wanted to shout at the old man, call him names, say something that would dig in deep and make him apologize.  Yet he doesn’t know if he can find the words, he would be vulnerable, useless stammering would ruin it.  _“And that skater, Georgi? If they were so brotherly, how is he not standing up for him?”_

 

Suddenly, Victor turns, a warm smile with a creeping undertone remains lining his eyes, “Looks like he doesn’t want hotpot, let’s go, Yuuri!”  He guides his pupil out the door, humming as they go.  “I think drunken shrimp would be delicious tonight!”

 

“Victor…” Yuuri frowns, he’s led to the outside, where their rental care sits in the parking lot.

 

“And duck blood! Maybe we can get some sake like when we had that picnic back home!”  The Russian hops into the driver side, as his partner tucks into his own seat and looking up to him.

 

“Victor…are you alright after that? I need you to talk to me…”  He gently sets his hand against the steering wheel to get his attention.  “…Please.”

 

His coach looks down to the hand, his blue eyes trail up the arm over to the black-haired head, Yuuri looks concerned, more than that he looks sad.  “…. Yuuri….My rink family is certainly upset at me.” He looks forward.  “I left them without notice, made them feel like I could drop them without saying goodbye. Yakov is angry, and says senseless things when he’s frustrated, has always done so, and of course it is…unorthodox for those insults.”

 

Yuuri frowns, moving his hand down to Victor’s and squeezing gently.  “…. They’re awful.”

 

“Yes, yes they are.  However, I’ve been his student…hell, closer to a son to him since I was twelve.”  His smile continues, “I know he still cares about me, even if words like that suggest otherwise.  Yakov is my family, and just like that family, sometimes we don’t get along.”

 

“But…how do you know?”

 

“If ever I was in danger, he would be the one who would step in to help me.  He would do anything for his students, and that helped me become your coach in doing this.”

 

The explanation started to make sense now, but that didn’t make him happy with any of it.  “…Doesn’t…Doesn’t it hurt?” He can think back on countless times he was in pain of much softer words than this, and though his boyfriend had been with him in times of terror and depression, he had never had the chance to do the same.

 

“Yes, of course it does… but I have faith that my old coach would never do anything to seriously tarnish our relationship.  If I called him at four in the morning upset, needing to talk, in danger, you can bet he’d book a flight to see me right away, and would call my family to make sure they knew I was okay.”

 

Though his boyfriend can’t understand how these words had been translated to love from a father figure, he knows Victor can handle this, and he nods.  “Okay… I understand a little better now…”

 

The Russian squeezes his hand back and holds it up to kiss his fingers.  “Come on… let’s go get some dinner, and if you want to talk further, we can do it at the hotel room.”

 

 

 

 

 

Hot platters of food surrounded the booth where the two sat, yet Yuuri had his head stuck in all that he had heard today, watching his lover eat the drunken shrimp excitedly.  _“What do I usually do for these situations? I guess I try to ignore the whole ordeal happened and then when I feel like I need to talk about it, I do.  Maybe I should let Victor come to me if he’s upset.”_   His thoughts are interrupted by the Russian accent.

 

“Don’t you want any shrimp?”

 

“Ah! No, no thank you.  Nothing raw for me before a competition.”  He answers, then glancing down at the table, when did that sake bottle get there?  He’s not sure when a server had even come around to give more than the waters they ordered before the food got there, perhaps while he was daydreaming.

 

It is then when a familiar voice comes right over, “Hey guys! Fancy seeing you here!” Phichit looks like he’s been out taking pictures, as he’s got one camera hanging from a strap at his neck, and his selfie stick with his phone in his hand.  “How are you?”

 

“Phichit! Nice to see you!”  Yuuri smiles, out of the corner of his eye, there’s another shot of sake Victor takes without being in his direct line of vision.  “Want to join us for dinner?”  Maybe some more company will keep Victor from just drowning his sorrows of his ice family’s mind.

 

“Sure! I’ll invite Ciao-Ciao!”

 

 

_“Well, I suppose the more the merrier…”_   Though Yuuri was reluctant to invite the old coach, as there were bound to be some awkward moments in this mixture of people.  _“But…maybe in doing this, we’ll all have a good time, maybe this will solve all the problems and clear the air for tomorrow’s competition.”_

 

 

Yuuri was wrong.  Yuuri was so incredibly wrong. 

 

There were way too many shots between three out of four of these figure skating lovers.  Coach Celestino had passed out from drinking too much, and Victor had drunk him under the table, cheering for himself as the champion.  His boyfriend was hanging around him, stripped down to his skivvies and slurred, stumbling on his own words, talking about how they need to go to the hot springs right this second.  Not only that, some competitors had showed up, Leo De La Iglesia and Guang hong ji, a pair who were way too young to be seeing what the Russian one was doing in his undies at the table.  Wherever he turned, one person in the group was either drunk, passed out, or had their phones on the Japanese man as he held his boyfriend on his back to keep him from slipping under the table. _“Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god….”_

 

Even Phichit was tipsy at this point, something he hadn’t seen since the two worked in Detroit at the club, and although Yuuri was a messy drunk, his friend was quite clumsy, and a drunk texter.  There was no doubt he’d be getting a slew of messages meant for Chris or Celestino, judging by how close the phone was pressed to his friend’s nose, it could be anyone.  “Yuuuuuurrriiiii, you guys are so cute together~” His best friend mumbles as he speaks from behind his phone.

 

“U-Uh…thanks! But my coach and I are in a very professional student/teacher relationship, I wouldn’t call it cute!” He whimpers as he tries to control everything going on at the table.  The waitress comes by, very annoyed by all the action going on here, and she slides the bill over.

 

“Sir, I’m going to have to ask for your party to leave once you pay the balance.”  He nods and starts digging out his wallet, trying to fumble through his wallet folds, and coming up with the blue card sitting in there.  He gives it to her, and he hopes he’s not going to overdraw for the day.  He’s paying for all the food in this buffet of a booth, all the drinks that tanked his new coach, old coach, AND current competition rival, and he’s sure that receipt also will state something about a few glasses that may have dropped off the edge.

 

_“Okay…I have to get Phichit and Celestino and Victor back to the hotel somehow….do I make trips? How do I even do this?”_ He didn’t want to ask Leo and Guang Hong for their assistance on this, they were just kids who happened to show up to get a picture with Victor, they shouldn’t have to carry him up to their room.  _And what if Victor started blabbing on about something?_

 

He gets his card back thankfully, leaves a tip, and stands up.  “Okay! Phichit, I’m going to need your help, Ciao-Ciao’s out and Victor’s not far behind.  Will you help me take them to the car?”  Out of the three drunks, he was the least tipsy, it only made sense to try to recruit him.

 

“Sure!” He drops his phone into his pocket and stands up, stumbling a bit, it takes just a moment to readjust, and get himself figured out on balance and coordination.

 

This gave Yuuri just enough time to turn to Victor and start redressing him, he pulls his pants back on him, and throws his coat over his bare chest, since dealing with buttons is not something he wants to do right now.  With a hefty zip up the front, Victor’s better clothed than he was before.  “Heyyyy, Leo!” Phichit waves, “Have some duck blood, it’s so good! We’ll see you tomorrow!”

 

The two younger ones mumbled something as a thank you, but they were mostly trying to see if they could get out of there without being associated with the quad of bumbled messes.  Yuuri pulls Victor up, an arm around his waist to keep him upright as he dug for the keys in his pocket.  “Okay, Victor, we’re going back to the hotel, alright? I need you to tell me if we need to stop for you to throw up.”

 

“I’m fine! I’m fine! I just want to be out of these clothes~ You want me today, I can tellllll~” He loudly states, yet Yuuri can only pray there’s not that many people outside, he’s lucky when he sees the late night is only shared by people who seem to not understand the Russian’s accent when it’s so slurred. 

 

“Yup. Always, come on.”

 

Loading all three of the tipsy people in the car, he groans a bit to himself, Yuuri was babysitting the night before a competition when he’d desperately need to get as much rest with as little worry as possible.  He had gone from concerned boyfriend to pissed off, thinking it was going to be a nice date night before the drinks started pouring, and it wasn’t just because his friend and old coach had showed up.  Victor was drinking before that too, and was by far the one who consumed the most.

 

How was he supposed to sleep well tonight making sure his lover wasn’t sick in his sleep?  Would Christophe be upset with him for delivering a drunken Phichit to his door and asking for him to be taken care of? And as he heard a chorus of snoring in his car by those three passengers, he wondered how he was going to get everyone inside.

 

 

Stopping before the hotel, he takes a deep breath, looking around and hoping he can find a way to do this in one swing.  That is until he sees a luggage trolley out front, then a lightbulb switches on in his head. 

 

 

Never did Yuuri Katsuki know that using the power of not wanting to make three trips up and down flights of stairs or elevators this late at night, that he would be carrying history’s first Thai skater to get this far into the GPF, five-time champion of said GPF Victor Nikiforov, or his careful prior coach up to their rooms. Let alone, he didn’t think he would be doing it on a hotel trolley, pretending they were luggage by throwing blankets from the car laying over them.  He carefully passes employees, turning his face away to keep them from recognizing him, and heads over to the elevators to see if they’ll work.  To his utter delight, they do.

 

Yuuri’s trip to Christophe’s room was wary, and he’s not sure the Swiss man will appreciate the visit, but it needs to be done, as he doesn’t have any keycards.  He knocks and calls, “Chris? You up?”  There’s a light that goes on beneath the door, and some grumbling and shuffling, before the door cracks, his blonde hair a mess.

 

“…. Yuuri? What’s going on, do you know how late it is?” He rubs his hazel eyes.

 

“Yes, I do.  But I need your help…” He lifts the blankets to show the three drinkers of the evening.  “I don’t have Phichit’s key, nor do I have Celestino’s.  I don’t know if you want to do this, but did you want to have Phichit sleep in your bed and I can stick Coach Celestino in the attached room?”

 

The expression changes from annoyed to concerned when he sees how the trio have crashed, he opens the door all the way. “That will be the best way, come on.  How much did my nudel drink?”

 

“Not as much as the other two, but enough.” He shakes his Thai friend’s shoulder, “Phich…. come on, I’ve got to get you to bed.”  Chris leans down and picks him up, bringing him to his feet at least.

 

The dark grey eyes open and look around, his face glowing when he sees his boyfriend. “Chris!”  He pulls his phone out, “I was just thinking about you!” The camera starts going off, taking a few selfies. “Gosh you look good with your hair like that!”

 

Yuuri pulls Celestino up next, glad he’s an athlete to be able to get this grown man over to the door right inside the room and opening it up.  It doesn’t take much for him to just toss him onto the bed, knowing he’ll be alright by himself, and the skaters in the room beside would wake him up in the morning.

 

Phichit is going through his pictures, already has his pants off, and hums as he stands in the bathroom, “Yuuri, I’m gonna post a picture of us on my page! It’s got You and Victor and me in them!”

 

_“Well…that doesn’t sound too bad…”_   He thinks to himself, “Just check it before you send it, make sure it’s a safe picture to post, alright?” He gets a nod from his friend who hiccups and shakes his head as he texts away.  He turns to the swiss man. “I’m really sorry for interrupting your night, but if drunk Phichit now is anything like when we worked in the club, he’s going to fall the hell to sleep in like two minutes and will just have a headache in the morning…”

 

“It’s alright, I’m glad you brought him to me instead of dropping him off in the other room.  I will make sure he has water before bed.” Patting his shoulder supportively, he turns to the bathroom door to get a cup for water.

 

 

Next challenge was Victor, as Yuuri opened the door, his coach has wrapped himself up in all the blankets, forming a blanket burrito of Russian descent.  He’s just happy their room is right across the hall, and he rolls the trolley over, unlocks the door, and pulls it in.  “Victor…Victor, time to get up…”

 

“I’ll get you up!” He grunts in the blankets and sits up, he seems to have somehow stripped again during the drop off on the other side, Yuuri pulls him up to his feet, but has to catch the stumbling mess of a lover he has.  “Heh…Yuuuurrriiiii~ You should get naked too~” He leans down to nibble on his neck.

 

Yuuri was not going to have it, “Nope.  You can ask me when you’re sober, Victor.” He pulls away, looking up to what he thought would be a sad face, but instead…a very green looking one. _“Oh fuck, he’s going to blow.”_

 

Quickly, he ushers the man into the bathroom, who takes it into his own hands by throwing his face into the toilet bowl.  It was a good thing he’d been naked, Yuuri didn’t want to clean up clothes like that.  With a sigh, he turns on the shower, letting Victor just do what he needs to do. _“I’m mad at him now… but I want to make sure he’s sober when I talk to him about this… And he’s not going to feel great if he goes to bed gross and tasting vomit.”_   He puts a hand down onto his silver haired head.  “Victor? Do you feel better?”

 

It takes a few coughs, but Victor sits up again.  “…. I feel better…”

 

“Good.”  He wets a cloth and gives it to Victor, who starts wiping his face.  “Now stand up, we’re taking a shower; you’re not going to want to go to bed covered in throw up after having so much fun tonight, do you?”  Victor stands up from the cold tile and sighs, shaking his head with a slightly clear-headed outlook, stepping into the shower. 

 

“No…. Thank you, Yuuri.”

 

With a nod, he takes off his own clothes, folding them up and setting them on the sink delicately to keep them neat and tidy.  Opening the shower curtain on the other side of the tub, he steps in to the light layer of water that pooled at their toes in a gentle current.  Victor closes his eyes as he feels the steam around the edges of his shoulders where the water doesn’t seem to drip down, the warmth seems to be getting him back to where he needs to be, in focus despite being temperate. 

 

He doesn’t realize he’s been dozing off until his head jerks up from the feeling of a rough scrubbing brush down his back and up his neck, lathered with soap suds, his lover is cleaning him and making sure he’s comforted, and he can tell just from that beautiful gesture. “Does that feel alright, Victor?”

 

“It feels wonderful.”  Oh, god, were those his words? They sounded like they were all one big word tripping over itself coming out.

 

There’s a bit more rinsing to wash it all away, then the water shuts off, Victor is almost sure he groans from the cold air hitting his skin again, feeling like the October air is filling him up.  He’s pulled out gently by those strong arms of his lover, and he’s given a towel, rubbing his face as he feels another towel wrap around his legs to dry them off as well.  The same towel flops over his head.  “Dry up your hair, so you don’t get a cold or anything, okay?” He hears from the other side of the white cloth; he responds with an approved grunt.

 

Clean pajama pants, clean sheets, clean self, a glass of water by his bedside, Victor’s not sure he’s ever had a time drinking this much where someone took such good care of him.  He’s had nights alone where his drunk self had left notes to ‘drnk waaaaaaatr’ and then leave a bottle of vodka near the bedside table, but never someone who made sure he was clean and happy before stepping into bed.  His only complaint, was that as he felt the blanket come up, he didn’t feel his lover slip in beside him to wrap their legs around each other in ritual goodnight snuggles.  Turning his head, he saw the other bed being utilized for the first time since they got here, Yuuri pulls the blankets up and turns out the light.  “…. Yuuri?”  He calls from his bed, sitting up a little.

 

“You should get some sleep, Victor.”  His lover’s voice says, back still turned to him. “I want to get as good of a rest as I can for tomorrow, so I’m sleeping over here, alright?” 

 

_“He’s upset.”_   Victor thinks immediately, yet as he wants to move over to talk to him, he also feels the urge to just pass out from all this.  Yuuri’s pretty much an insomniac who hasn’t been diagnosed yet, and he’s exhausted, he wants to roll over and go to sleep, but the tension in his words linger to the intoxicated man. _“He’s holding back, he’s upset, why is he upset?”_  The more he thinks, the more it exhausts him as he scoots over to the edge of his bed.  When he can’t be right beside Yuuri, he wants to be as close as possible to him while respecting his space, he’s to the very edge, holding his pillows in his arms as he looks over at him.  _“I did something wrong, I know I did.”_   Though fully aware, he’s not able to stay awake long, the more he wants to talk, the less energy he has to do so.  His eyes drop like boulders off cliffs, he crashed hard into his sleep.

 


	30. The Little Fan

 

It took Yuuri about an hour to get to sleep, but that was quicker than most nights when he would combat rest and worry all in the same evening.  The worried glancing to the other bed was partly to blame, as he kept telling himself to possibly prop Victor up against something so he wouldn’t choke if he were to vomit again.  It frightened him to death.  Every noise that was made from the other side of the room, even the gentle sleepy sighs that filled the corners where rose petals sat the night before was as if Yuuri was being shocked by some exposed wire, it made his nerves feel hot and on edge. 

 

Nope, he couldn’t wait any longer, after a while, he stood up and went to the other bed, piling some pillows behind the Russian’s back to keep him on his side, and then tucking him in to assure a safe night’s sleep. It is only then he can climb into his own bed and get some thinly veiled rest.

 

 

The room was still dark, but the sense of morning was present, more so now that Victor shifted in the feeling of his biological clock within, grumbling at the stinging of his own blankets as the sound of his legs stretching was even too loud for him.  It’s early, earlier than their alarm clock would usually go off for a jog and some practice to look forward to, and yet the realization of being awake forces him to sit up.  There was a familiar pulse that slinks through every vein and with each blink, his eyes felt they were two blocks of hot coal burning his aching brain.  With legs swinging over the side of the bed, he looks up to see the other mattress with a clearer head than last night, yet the hangover was no match for the shame that began welling up in his throat. 

 

Last night was in puzzle pieces, some missing, as he goes over what had happened between their lovely date and getting home and in that shower.  _”Let’s see… I started doing shots with Celestino…I took selfies with Phichit…. Yuuri….did I get naked? Did Yuuri have to dress me?”_   He glances to the clock, he’d woken up just a moment before it were going to go off, and he doesn’t want to be the one to wake the exhausted skater on a day like this.  He didn’t deserve that, not after the pupil had taken care of everyone except himself.  He knew Victor had a rough reaction to Yakov’s words and excused it, drinking away his feelings instead. _“And I told him…I was alright… when I wasn’t.”_

 

When the alarm clock buzzes, it nearly breaks his eardrum, hangovers were the worst with the unexpected noises and he tries to hum slightly to ease the headache.  He presses the button on top and hears the steady breathing of his boyfriend, as it’s shifted to a long sigh, rolling over to try to find his glasses. 

 

Yuuri sits up and rubs his face before setting the spectacles on his nose, and looking over to see those blue eyes, bloodshot red, watching him.  “….Hey, Victor….” The tone of avoidance, the lack of eye contact, Yuuri was tired and upset about the events that transpired the night before. “Um… How do you feel?”

 

“Ashamed.”  He bows his silver haired head softly as he buries his hands in the strands, it was somewhat soothing to feel them running through his scalp.  “I’m sorry, Yuuri, I didn’t want to drink to upset you, and that was- “

 

“No.”  Yuuri faces him, legs hanging off the side of the bed with his hand reaching out to take his out of his hair.  “How do you feel about what Yakov said?” 

 

The confusion kept him from speaking, Victor didn’t expect this question at all, and his brain wasn’t processing the words in one formable sentence, yet as each one individually.  “…. What?”

 

“I know that’s why you were drinking so much; you wouldn’t have had more than one cup the night before a competition.”

 

It was almost enough to make him nauseated, and he clears his throat.  “…. Yuuri, please, listen to me.”

 

“No.” He sternly holds his hand up, interrupting him and taking the conversation back.  “I’m going to ask that you answer my next question if you’re not going to answer the one I just gave you.  Do you remember what I said about you at that press conference where I announced my theme?”  Victor squeezes onto his hands and sighs, shaking his head to try to remember those words.  It seems Yuuri will say them regardless.  “I said you were the first person in my life I wanted to hold onto.”

 

“It was a few days after you said you loved me…”  Victor nods, feeling the Japanese man rise, still holding onto him, and sitting by his side on the same bed.  “It was the happiest I think I’ve been in a long time.”

 

“When I said that, I meant it entirely.  You said you were alright last night, and then blatantly showed me you absolutely weren’t by drinking a dozen or so shots to make yourself feel better.  You could have opened up to me, like you always tell me to do, and we could have talked about it!”

 

Victor’s shame continues, he knew his lover was right, he hadn’t been open with all his emotions like his pupil has been, boxing up the negative ones with a smile, and disregarding those who wished to help.  “Yuuri, I….I agree wholeheartedly agree… I’m so used to being my only shoulder to cry on, I should have thought about it…”

 

“Not only that… But Victor, I want to be with you, for a long time, and if I don’t know how to take care of you, how do I know you’re being honest with me?”

 

The Russian pulls him into a hug and strokes his head, “I’ll be honest with you, I will.”

 

“Good…”  Yuuri yawns and rubs his face a bit, still exhausted from his few hours of sleep he was getting from all this excitement.  “Now, because I took a shower with you last night, and I also did way more extra exercise, I’m going to take an extra hour to sleep, and then we’ll get out of here.” 

 

Though the coach was going to argue about it, he realizes he was himself the reason for such little sleep, and he nods, stepping over to the dresser, getting his clothes on, and smiling.  “I’ll get some breakfast with Chris and bring you up something.”

 

 

 

The beautiful invention of coffee was Victor’s life and love today, and he was excited to be able to have the downstairs lobby to himself except for a few different employees who pass with the complimentary breakfast being set up.  It was nice to have such a peaceful area.  _“Ah… I wish the moments before every competition were like this, I should savor this before it all becomes so congested.”_  

 

“Ah, I was going to ask for a white Russian, but a silver one will do just fine.”  Says a Swiss accent that creeps up behind him as he sits in his chair, Victor takes a deep breath as his thoughts are interrupted, and he turns his head slowly.  “Someone’s quiet, I’m guessing the flowers haven’t bloomed for you yet, your head must be swimming.”

 

“Just a little, Chris.”  The blonde walks over and sits beside him at the coffee table, he as well is carrying some coffee, just in a small cardboard cup like he’d walked to a shop nearby.  “How did you two sleep?  I seem to remember your lover being quite eager to dance with you... or did he dance for you?”

 

Though there was some semblance of dirty talk in there, sure to crack a smile from his foreign friend, Christophe looks a bit concerned to him.  “We need to talk, Victor.”

 

“Chris~ Did you need my help with getting your little hamster back in the happy place?  I fear this may be a little too soon after the last one, am I going to make your relationship work for you?”

 

“Victor.” His voice sounds a little more urgent as he pulls his phone out. “Phichit was tipsy last night and he posted a few pictures of the four of you doing shots last night… One of them might be a bit concerning to you, more than the others.”

 

His blue eyes blink, a gulp arising in his throat as he shifts, leaning up to look down at the screen.  “What is it? What’s in it?”  The big picture that pops up is less than admirable, one of his naked back, arms draped over Yuuri, who looks quite panicked, and Phichit in the foreground with a scandalous face.  How suggestive it looked with the bedroom eyes Victor posed with in the picture, with how he pressed against his lover and how red they both were in the face because of it.  There was a caption in Chinese, which is recognized as being posted on one of the largest news websites on these soils.  “…. Phichit….?”

 

“He drunk texts when he’s tipsy, and he meant to send it to you, instead, he posted it on twitter, and now it’s everywhere.” Chris leans forward and whispers.  “Do you think people suspect of your relationship?”

 

Victor is silent a moment as he takes the phone, scrolling through comments, and yet…he’s not as frightened as he thought he would be in the moment of knowing he was absolutely wasted and seductively against his lover in a viral photo.  The comments beneath translated through the online app, it appears there are only one or two negative comments, which seem to be mostly about drinking before a competition, there are hundreds that state how loving they are. 

 

_They’re so cute together!_

_How adorable it is, Victor looks to him for support!_

_Yuuri looks so flustered, poor thing!_

_This’ll be an awkward morning after_

 

They’re friendly, they’re supportive, fans that wouldn’t stray from the ones they cheer for no matter what would be posted.  Victor Nikiforov was shown naked and drunk and inappropriate and they still think the world of him, and show concern for the man he adores.  “…. Who cares if they know, Chris?”

 

The lobby seems much quieter than it was before suddenly, as Chris’s hazel eyes stared him down with a bit of an expression that grows softer with each second.  “… Victor, are you still drunk?”  He asks gently, a hint of joking in his voice.  “I mean… You know the implications that come with coming out like this, we’ve seen it happen with many athletes in many sports.”

 

“I love Yuuri, and if the world so happens to know this, maybe…. It wouldn’t be so bad.”  He sips his coffee, looking down at the creamy brown liquid, it reminded him of his lover’s eyes when he would stare longingly into them.  “I know he’d love to be out with me, out for real, not just with family.”

 

Chris sighs and leans back, looking up at the ceiling.  “Do you want to hold a press conference for it? What’s your plan exactly?”

 

There’s a sigh and a shrug as he hands the phone back to him, sure that he will look it up later and smiles a bit.  “I don’t know… I really don’t…”

 

 

 

The televisions across the world are tuned in, all at different time zones as the skaters are arriving to their own competition in Beijing’s best ice rink.  Surprisingly, there’s a crowd that gathers behind a red rope set up hours before, and the afternoon’s light has filled the city that bustles with the excitement of the athletic event. 

 

Yuuri steps out, sporting his black and blue Japan Jacket, eyes sternly focused on the entrance as the lights of the cameras and the cheers of fans increase.  He looks slightly surprised at the group of people who are so excited for him, he had no idea he even had any fans out here a plane trip away from home.   In fact, it seems before he can even fully place both feet on the ground, his coach is pulling him towards a particularly excited crowd.  “Ah! Victor!”

 

“Come on! Your fans want to meet you, Yuuri!”

 

Adjusting his glasses, he stands upright and adjusts his stepping, seeing the crowd who seems to go nuts when he approaches.  “Oh boy, uh… H-Hello everyone!”  They have pictures and merchandise of him, some of which he hasn’t seen before.  It looks like most of them are handmade, which is heartwarming yet also a little intimidating how they look so forward to meeting him.  “Victor, do you have a marker?”

 

“Why, Yuuri! I thought you’d never ask!” He chuckles, pulling his jacket open to give him a gold marker.  Of course, it was gold.  “Only the best for the next champion!”

 

Victor steps aside, a little chubby boy tries peeking over the rope, where his little hands can barely wrap around as he peers over with straight black hair and big brown eyes, he’s wearing a little Katsuki shirt, one that nearly matches his idol’s jacket.  He goes unnoticed due to his short size as the movement of the crowd nearly makes him disappear.

 

How unnerving, so confident he’ll win gold again, and he takes the marker and starts signing pictures and shirts, standing with his coach for press photos, some fan selfies, and popularity poses.  He’s not used to being the center of attention in these events, though having a world-famous coach helps.  “Wow, it’s sure nice to be able to have you guys supporting me, I hope you all enjoy the competition today!”

 

Victor starts ushering his student, “You did so well, look at how your fans just fell apart just at the sight of you~” 

 

The little boy, so excited as he tries to wave at the skater, plops beneath the rope onto the ground behind the pair.  He squeaks as his noise is heard by the Japanese man, who whips his head around, noticing the bundled up four-year-old struggling to get up from his clunky snowboots.  “Ah!” Instinctively, as he would with the triplets back home, he rushes over and kneels beside him to help the child up.  “Hey! Are you okay, little guy?”

 

The kid looks up as he’s assisted to his feet, and those big eyes begin to well up anxiously, the sight of the celebrity is almost overwhelming.  “W…. W... Wuh….”  He starts whimpering, shaking and covering his face with his little gloved hands.

 

“It’s okay! It’s okay!”  Yuuri puts on his big smile, trying to show the little one everything’s alright.  “You took a little tumble there.”

 

Victor’s heart feels so warm at this sight, the confidence that is so much better than the cold air he used to have towards those who looked up to him.  He knew how much Yuuri respected little kids, as they were just big balls of anxiety just like he’s always been.  It’s heartbreaking to hear the little one say, “I-I-I’m s-s-s-sor-r-ry!”  Oh goodness, it sounded like the little boy had a stutter, and he looks so flustered and embarrassed by it.

 

“It’s okay!” Yuuri says again, “What’s your name?”

 

Seems as though the other skaters look behind themselves to see the little boy, and they pause at the door to see what happens.

 

“C-C-Cha-….Ch-Chanm-ming.”  He manages out, starting to calm down a little as his nervous tick takes him a minute.

 

Yuuri doesn’t pay any attention to that tick, he just keeps smiling.  “It’s nice to meet you Chanming!  Did you want a photo? Or a hug?”  He holds his arms open, in case the young one accepts, and although hesitant, his little legs waddle closer to give him a hug. 

 

Behind them, the press starts to go crazy, yet he barely notices as he stands up, the little guy’s legs wrap against his hip as he bounces him gently to calm him down.  Just like the triplets back home, he wanted to comfort him when he fell.  Victor even walks over and leans forward. “Are you a little skater?”

 

“I-I-I skate th-three times per we-ee-eek.”  He answers, looking much better than just a moment before when he was face down on the sidewalk.  “I-I w-wanna b-be like Kats-s-suki Yuuri!”

 

Yuuri looks delighted at that, and he chuckles a bit.  “Well, keep up with skating, I bet you’ll be amazing!”  Chanming is smiling as well as he holds onto his idol.  “Did you come here with your parents today?”  He nods a little, saving his stuttering words.  “Okay, let’s look for her.  Did someone lose a little skater?” The Japanese man calls, looking around his crowd of fans, who start frantically waving, taking pictures. _“Oh dear, this might take a moment.”_

 

“M-M-Mommy!” He calls, pointing to a woman in the back who seems to be frantic at trying to get up front.

 

Victor frowns, about to go back there and get the woman herself so she can get up front without these fangirls losing it, when a soft voice he knows and adores calls, “Excuse me, guys?  Can you please let her through?”  So polite, so sweet, so much so the fans calm down.  They look at each other a moment before separating, allowing the woman to rush forward with her arms open.  As Yuuri looks to the little one, he asks. “You said this is your mommy?”

 

“Y-Ye-Yes!”

 

“Okay, good!  You cheer for me nice and loud, Chanming, okay? I want to hear you, so I can make you proud!”   Slowly he passes the little one over and smiles to his mother.  “Please, be safe in case the crowd makes you lose him, it’s really easy to get separated between everyone here.”  He signs another photo, just for them, and waves as he walks away with his coach.

 

Victor has a mighty grin on his face, and he wraps an arm around his student, he’s almost blushing.  “You have no business being as adorable as you are, it must be a hazard.”

 

“What?” Blinks Yuuri, looking over his shoulder and then back to Victor.

 

“Goodness~ I want to see how you are with our kids someday~ You’ll probably be so adorable.”  Victor smirks, nudging him playfully, watching as his face grows pink and his hands cover up his cheeks.  “Oh, don’t be shy~ If we’re going to be together a while, we’re bound to think of those kinds of things, whether we decide to have it happen or not~”

 

Shaking his head, he looks around, shushing him. “Aren’t you afraid someone will hear us?”

 

“Not at all~ I shouldn’t be afraid of talking about you.”

 

 

That was new, Yuuri was surprised as can be that those words passed Victor’s lips.  Was he trying to make up for last night’s drinking binge? Did he have a change of heart? What is this new feeling that rushed over him hotter than his pink cheeks?  “…. Well…. Maybe we’ll talk after the competition.”  He gulps and turns, walking towards the locker room.  Victor chuckles and follows him with his hands tucked into his pockets.

 

Stepping into the bright locker room, he notices the familiar friends of the ice: Leo de la Iglesia, Guang Hong Ji (Both avoiding them) Georgi Popovich, and a nervous looking Phichit.  Yuuri leans over to his coach, mumbling quietly.  “Hey… Why don’t you go apologize to Leo and Guang Hong?  You kind of freaked them out a bit last night and all they wanted was some pictures with you.”

 

With a nod, he approaches the two respectively, his student goes over to the Thai friend to see why the sunny personality was now filled with stormy weather.  “H-Hey Yuuri!” He smiles a bit, clinging to his phone a bit more than usual.

 

“Phichit, how do you feel after last night? Everything okay?”

 

“Yeah…but I kind of need to show you something.”  He hands the phone over with a frown.  The photo of Victor against Yuuri in a naked and drunken stupor, it was as though he were modeling.

 

“Oh god, everyone’s going to think I was out fooling around after I made such a big speech of how serious this year was going to be! Augh!”

 

“I’m sorry! I was tipsy, I chose the wrong picture to post on twitter and I could have outed you!”

 

There’s a disappointed sigh in that, and he hands the phone back over with a shaking head.  “it’s not obvious enough, but Victor might be concerned about it, we can blame it on the drinking but he’ll worry...”

 

Perhaps he should tell him after he skates, perhaps he should talk to him when someone else is skating, make him walk with him to a quiet place and discuss what to say about it to the press. 


End file.
